Things already weren’t working out well.
Dr. Jacobson had thrown a fit when I told him that I wouldn’t be working during the summer after all. Even with a week’s notice, he’d gone over my head and complained to my advisor.
That hadn’t been fun because, apparently, Don had already complained about me too, mentioning how I was going away to work on my dissertation instead of being a serious student and remaining on campus.
It was all bullshit… but my advisor had grilled me on my continued commitment to my studies and had hinted that he could make my final year unpleasant if my next dissertation draft was less than stellar.
The bottom line was… I needed to play the role of Mrs. Brendan Ward perfectly so I could get the divorce out of the way. I also needed to write the most amazing and insightful dissertation the world had ever known, or the past four years of my life would have been in vain.
I was having trouble filtering through all the panic inside me. I kept shoving it aside, pretending that it was just nerves, but it was way more than that. The reality of the situation had hit me hard when I got out of the car. I was going to live here, with Brendan. I was going to see him every day. I was going to have to touch him when it was required. Smile at him. Get used to the idea of him smiling at me.
Like we were still in love.
My stomach fluttered, and it had nothing to do with the horse manure. The man who’d made me melt in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt looked even better in the cowboy hat. Under the glow of the sun, he was very hard to ignore, and it pissed me off to no end that he could still affect me like this.
It was going to be a long summer if I couldn’t keep my hormones in check.
“Before we go in, there are a few people I want you to meet. Micah Hollister was the person who greeted you when you came in. He’s my head horse groomer. We call him Mickie. Debra Jefferson is my horse trainer. You’ll probably meet her before the day ends, and this is Ben Jessup. He’s my ranch manager.” Brendan gestured to a slightly older man. “They help me take care of the ranch. They’re important to me, so while you’re here, they need to be important to you.”
“Of course.” I shook Ben’s hand and tried to ignore the critical gaze he swept over me. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“I’m not sure if you’re aware of this, but it looks like you might have stepped in something,” he said as he pointed to my feet.
Wonderful. He apparently also thought I was a complete idiot. “Yes. I realize that. Thank you for pointing that out to me,” I muttered through gritted teeth. Was anyone on this ranch going to like me?
“You married her?” Ben muttered. “Really?”
“She wasn’t like this eight years ago,” Brendan assured him.
“You weren’t some country bumpkin eight years ago either,” I grumbled under my breath. They both looked at me quizzically, and I took a deep breath. “Never mind. We don’t need to talk about the past. We just need to focus on the present.”
“She’s a psychiatrist,” Brendan explained.
“Psychologist,” I corrected. “Almost anyway. I won’t prescribe medicine. I still have a year of school left, and I still need to finish my dissertation. I’m hoping to finish it while I’m here.”
Ben raised his eyebrows. “Smart and beautiful. No wonder you slipped through his fingers.”
“Cute.” Brendan narrowed his eyes. “Real cute.”
“Just calling it like I see it. Darling, you’ll need to get yourself a pair of boots if you plan on walking around here. We’ve got a lot of horses.”
Did everyone at this ranch think that I was a moron? “Thank you for the advice. I’ll keep that in mind.”
Just then, Brendan’s phone rang. “Ward,” he barked into the phone as he answered. Immediately, he straightened. “We’ll be right there.” Hanging up, he eyed me. “And now it’s time for you to meet Harry Blackwell.”
I gaped at him. “Now?”
His mouth was a tight line. “Yes. Here’s here now. I guess Gordon’s rumors through the grapevine reached all the right people because he’s here to meet my wife.”
I couldn’t help but wince. I was hoping to have a little more time to acclimate myself before playing the loving wife, but on the other hand, the sooner Brendan signed this deal, the sooner I could go back to my life.
“Let’s get this over with.”
“That’s the spirit,” Brendan said sarcastically. He put his hand on the small of my back and pushed me toward the house. Immediately, my heart skipped a beat. I tried to shove the feeling down deep inside me.
Ben started to follow us, and Brendan turned around and stared at him. “What are you doing?”
Ben snorted. “You don’t really think that I’m going to miss this, do you?”
As we walked across the pasture and out to the dirt road that wound around the fields, I tried to ignore the stench of the horses and my shoes. The sprawling white farmhouse really was beautiful. With its pale blue trim and tin roof, it was an old house with a modern edge. There was a wraparound porch and a second-story balcony. I was already imagining sitting out under the California sun and working on my paper. The view in all directions was incredible too. In spite of being a city girl, I couldn’t wait to explore it.
Even city girls liked a little nature.
“Would you walk a little closer to me?” Brendan hissed as he wrapped his arm around my waist. I nearly fell over as he pulled me closer.
“I don’t need to be this close, do I?” I had to grab his shirt to stay balanced, and I was fairly certain that I looked like a drunk as we neared the older man waiting by the fence.
“Mr. Blackwell,” Brendan said heartily. “Did we have a meeting today?”
“Brendan.” The older man smiled charmingly as I righted myself. “I heard an interesting rumor, and I just had to see for myself. Is it true? Are you married?”
“You heard?” Brendan made a show of pushing his hat back and scratching his head. “I guess that doesn’t surprise me. News travels fast around here, although I’d hoped to keep it quiet while we work things out. Harry Blackwell, this is my wife, Jillian. Jillian, this is our neighbor.”
“Pleasure to meet you.” I gently disengaged myself from Brendan and shook his hand.
“Brendan didn’t mention anything about a wife a few weeks ago when we spoke.” His gaze sharpened as he looked at me. “Which is odd considering that this is exactly what I wanted for him.”
Brendan didn’t really think that he could fool this man, did he?
I glanced back uncertainly at him. “You wanted Brendan to be married? That’s very neighborly of you.”
“I wanted Brendan to be settled and happy.”
“I see. Well, I’m afraid that we’re a long way from either.” Clearing my throat, I tried to look sheepish. I needed to play this role perfectly. “Brendan and I got married when we were young and foolish. We should have gotten a divorce a long time ago, but we…” I slid my hand into Brendan’s, linking our fingers together. “We just didn’t, for some reason.”
The old man narrowed his eyes. “So you’ve been married for years?”
I nodded. “Since I was eighteen. Six months ago, I approached Brendan again, thinking we should probably just make things final but…” I let my voice trail off uncertainly as I glanced back at Brendan.
He smiled softly at me. “I guess I’m not ready to let her go just yet.” He turned his attention back to the older man. “And what you said to me in that meeting hit me between the eyes, Harry. You aren’t the only one living with regrets. After I left you, I couldn’t get Jillian off my mind. I went to see her and…”
He stroked a hand down my hair. It wasn’t hard to smile back at him this time as all the feelings I used to have for this man came flooding back.
“So you’re going to see if the ashes still have any flame? How charming.” The old man chuckled, but he didn’t seem fully convinced. “I didn’t know that Brendan had it in him.
Are those your bags in the driveway? Are you moving in?”
“We’re seeing a marriage counselor,” Brendan interjected quickly. My eyes widened, and I took a step back. Inside, I bristled. Marriage counseling was a serious thing, not some tool for him to use to get a land deal. “She advised that since we’ve been apart for so long, we should move back in and see if we still like the people that we’ve become.”
“Like?” Harry cocked his head and stared at us. “Don’t you mean love?”
“Baby steps,” I muttered.
I was more than a little pissed, and Harry could tell. He chuckled, a sparkle in his eyes. “I can see that you two have some work to do. I think I’ll check in frequently and see how things are going. This sounds like it’s going to prove very entertaining.”
Entertaining? Having the one man we were trying to trick around so often would be a nightmare, and Brendan didn’t make it any better. “Would you like to join us for dinner?”
“No, I’m actually on my way to dinner. I just had to see things for myself. Mrs. Ward, I can’t wait to get to know you a little better. Brendan, we’ll talk later.”
He walked slowly back to his car and climbed in. As soon as he was out of sight, I rounded on Brendan. “A marriage counselor? Are you kidding me?”
“I had to say something. He was already suspicious,” he defended. “I’m not actually going to make you go to marriage counseling.”
“That’s not the point, and you know it. It’s not okay to lie about that kind of thing.” Marching away from him, I grabbed one of my bags. “Can you please show me to my room? I need a shower and to change.”
He didn’t even move. “This whole thing is a lie, and you’re pissed that I lied about counseling?”
I faced him. “It’s one thing to fake a reconciling marriage, but when you include us getting professional help, and we don’t make things work, then you’re giving counseling a bad name.” I didn’t even know why I was arguing with him. I would never make him understand.
“No amount of counseling could have helped us anyway,” he muttered under his breath.
I could tell from the look on his face that he immediately regretted the words, but I felt like he’d just slapped me in the face. Whirling around, I dragged my luggage behind me as I headed toward the house.
It was going to be a long couple of months.
CHAPTER TEN
Brendan
Jillian looked around the bedroom with narrowed eyes. “This doesn’t look like the guest room,” she said slowly.
“Really? What makes you think that?” I teased.
Crossing her arms, she gave me that annoyed look she did so well. “For one thing, the bed isn’t made. Your clothes are all over the floor, and it smells like you.”
“You know how I smell?”
“Brendan, I agreed to move to the ranch for a few months, but I did not agree to share a bed. Quit messing around and show me to my room. My actual room.” She reached over for her luggage, and I quickly blocked the door. Having her in my room was more intimate than I expected, but I wasn’t just messing with her.
“The house is old, Jillian. It needs a little work. There is a bathroom attached to the guest bedroom, but the shower doesn’t work, and Kim gets a little crazy when it comes to her bathroom. If you want to shower before dinner, you’ll have to use mine.”
I could see the yearning in her eyes as she looked behind her to the bathroom. “Fine. You’re not planning on staying in here while I shower, are you?”
“Worried that you won’t be able to control yourself once you’re naked?” I asked softly as I took a step toward her. She immediately backed up, and I froze. The panic in her eyes hurt more than I wanted to admit. I didn’t want to push it on her first day here. “I’ve still got some work to do. The guest bedroom is on the first floor off the living room. Dinner is at seven.”
“Thanks.” She still looked pissed as I walked out. I knew that she was angry about the marriage counseling comment, but I hadn’t meant anything bad by it. She was here for one reason, and I was going to do whatever it took to make sure this plan worked.
I’d barely gotten down the steps before I heard the water start running, and I grinned. The picture of her horrified in the middle of a pile of manure would entertain me for years to come.
But I didn’t have time to entertain Jillian all day. There was work to do, and I’d barely carved out enough time to get her settled. I did my best to pretend that this day was no different than any other day as I headed back outside to one of the pastures.
Ben met me at the gate. “That’s a real sweetheart you’ve got there.”
“I’ve pretty much ruined her life by yanking her here,” I admitted. “So, I’m not exactly on her Christmas list this year. She won’t be here long, so all personal opinions should be kept to yourself.”
Ben snorted. “Yeah, that’s going to work. How long were you married anyway?”
“Too long, and that’s all I’m going to say on the subject. How is Onyx doing?” One of my broodmares was due to give birth soon, and I was already fielding high-profile interests in the foal. The father had a long history of race winners in his lineage.
“Vet should be out in the morning. I’m more concerned with Silva at the moment. He hasn’t been eating much since Blue died.”
“What?” I jerked my head up. “Ben, that was days ago. Why am I just hearing about that now?”
“You’ve been busy.” We walked to the stable, and I stared at the gray workhorse. We’d rescued him and Blue a few months ago from an abusive owner. We tried so hard with Blue, and for a few weeks, we thought he was going to make it. I knew that Silva and Blue were bonded, but I hadn’t realized how much. “I called the vet, and he’s agreed to see Silva and Onyx tomorrow, but I don’t really think that there’s much we can do if I can’t get him to eat.”
Silva swayed from side-to-side and kept his head down to the ground. I gritted my teeth and shook my head. I hadn’t rescued the horses just to lose both of them. Silva was still young. I would find a way to make sure he did more than survive. He was going to live a good life here.
“Move Darling into this stable. If we can get him interested in her, he’ll want to eat again.”
Opening the stall, I cautiously approached him. The stallion had healed from the wounds his bastard of a previous owner had inflicted, but he was still wary of men. Debra and Kim had some luck with the poor horse, but they were both too busy to spend too much time with him.
Although, there was one female who now had nothing but time on her hands. An idea bloomed in my mind. “How do you feel about pretty blondes?” I asked softly as I checked his feed bucket. Shaking it to try and entice him, I kept a close eye on the stallion.
He was keeping a close eye on me as well, and his nostrils were flaring.
I kept talking in a calm voice. “She’s got a bit of a thorny side, and I don’t think she really loves animals, but I think you might find her interesting. God knows that I do. Years ago, she could make me melt with a single look. Of course, I’m a little harder now. It takes a little bit more than a long look from a pretty woman, but she might be your type, Silva. What do you think?”
As I walked around the stall, careful to keep to the edge, Silva moved to keep an eye on me. His gait was unsteady, which was a bad sign. I didn’t want to have to force-feed him. It would stress him out even more.
I didn’t actually think that Jillian could do anything with Silva, but if I could convince her to keep him company, he might start to eat again. With Blue gone, the stallion was probably lonely. Hopefully, by seducing him with a pretty mare and a pretty girl, he’d feel a little less alone.
We got Darling situated in the stall across from him. Darling was easily adaptable and didn’t mind the new location. She chomped cheerfully on her feed and didn’t seem to care at all about the stallion staring at her from across the barn. Pleased that at least Silva was staring at something other than the floor,
I headed out to finish the day’s chores.
Afterward, I headed up to my room to shower before dinner. The door to the guest room was closed, and Jillian’s luggage was gone from my room, but the scent from her shampoo and body wash clung to every surface of the bathroom. It hit me like a brick wall when I walked in, and I froze.
“Excuse me!” she laughed as I opened the door. “I have class in forty minutes, and I don’t have time for whatever dirty thing you have in mind!”
“Dirty? You’re in the shower. What dirty thing could I possibly do in here?” I slipped in behind her and immediately stroked my fingers up and down her soapy and naked sides. All I’d had to do was walk in and just hear the water running, and I immediately wanted her.
“That dirty thing!” she laughed as she whirled around.
“Oh, sweetheart. I must not be doing things right if you thought that was dirty,” I teased as I moved my fingers lower to some place far warmer and wetter. She immediately moaned as I stroked her. “Now, that was dirty. Just how badly do you need to get to class?”
“I have… oh, yes… ah… a test… oh, baby…” She panted as she wrapped her arms around my neck and clung to me.
“Forty minutes. You only need a few minutes to get dressed. I bet I can make you come at least three times before the water grows cold.”
By then, I knew her body so well. Within seconds, she was shaking in my arms. Gripping her waist, I pulled her up against me and slid inside as she wrapped her legs around me. Sinking my teeth into her shoulder, I groaned as I fucked her good and hard.
“Hell,” I swore as I turned on the water. If this happened every time she took a shower in my bathroom, I wasn’t going to get anything done. I was hard as a rock with no outlet.
Except the sweet little morsel downstairs, but there was definitely a hands-off policy there.
I showered and dressed. Janice, the woman we employed to do some light housekeeping and cooking, already had dinner on the table. “Thanks, Janice. This looks wonderful,” I said as I gave her a quick hug.
Reclaiming My Wife Page 9