by Ava Miles
“You eat fast,” she commented with a slow smile.
Her nerves seemed to have faded away after their talk in the kitchen, and for that, he was grateful. “I always did. Growing up, it meant more playtime after dinner before dark. And in the Army…” He let the sentence trail off, not wanting to introduce darkness to their night.
“I’ve always been a slow eater,” she said, chewing a piece of meat thoughtfully. Suddenly her eyes widened. Her mouth stopped working, and she quickly turned her back to him, rummaging for her napkin.
“I see you found the shot that ended that bird,” he commented with a chuckle.
“Oh, that is so gross! I’m going to have to wash my mouth out.” She rose and darted out of the room.
He opened her napkin. The hunter had used an eight shot. Jake found himself holding his breath. He hadn’t seen a bullet since his Army days. His mind conjured up images of ammunition shells on a dust-strewn street in Baghdad, so he forced himself to close the napkin. Sitting back in his chair, he breathed deeply and reached for composure. He wasn’t in Baghdad anymore. He was here in Dare River with a beautiful woman.
He was not going to let the past ruin this moment.
But he couldn’t close it out, so he rose and took the napkin into the kitchen and tossed the whole thing in the trash. The woman who’d come over to help him set up had left a few extra napkins on the kitchen counter, so he grabbed Susannah a fresh one.
When she returned, she shook her head. “Sorry about that. I realized as I ran out of here that I was making a fuss.”
He forced a smile. “Make all the fuss you want. It’s no bother to me.”
“Well,” she said, dropping into her seat. “That was a first. Usually, I don’t think about how the animal I’m eating died.”
“And yet that’s what happens. Everything dies.” Then he bit back a curse. “Sorry, that was a horrible thing to say.” And on their first date, no less.
Her gaze flew to his. “No. You’re right. It’s okay to say…whatever comes, Jake. You were more than understanding of me in the kitchen. I want to be the same way for you.”
Somehow those words helped wash away the last of the residue clinging to him.
Noticing her new napkin, she dropped it into her lap. “Thanks for handling that for me.”
“No bother,” he said, clearing his throat. “I’m sorry it had to happen.”
“How about we move on to dessert?” she suggested. “I’m assuming a fancy meal comes with dessert.”
“It sure does,” he said, rising and taking their plates this time. “I believe I told the chef that you have a thing for chocolate.”
The delighted squeal behind him burned away any of the lingering ill ease he’d felt after seeing the shot. “You did? Oh, what did he make?”
“I believe he made you a triple chocolate cake with raspberry and espresso filling.”
Another squeal erupted. “He did? If he were here, I’d have to thank him. Profusely. But since he’s not, I guess I’ll have to thank you.”
“No thanks necessary,” he said immediately. “Are you ready to behold the cake?”
He took the pastry box out of the refrigerator and flipped it open.
“Good heavens!” she exclaimed. “It looks delicious.”
He had high hopes for this dessert after the grouse. “The chef also left one of those stainless steel makers that whips cream.” Of course, he’d had some fantasies about other possible uses for the device, but he’d put them on the shelf for the moment. Her delight over the cake would have to be enough.
“All righty then,” she said, taking the box from him. “Let’s serve us up some cake.”
After they were seated with their dessert, Jake found himself experiencing a new level of sexual torture. Watching Susannah eat chocolate could tempt a monk, but listening to Susannah eat chocolate…well, she could tempt a saint. He tried to focus on his own cake, but he couldn’t maintain his composure.
No, not when she was uttering those adorable little moans beside him and fluttering her eyelids as she chewed.
“You’re torturing me, you know,” he drawled, glancing over at her.
She immediately stilled and stopped chewing. He’d meant it as a bit of a joke, no more than that, but the delight faded from her face. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t think.”
She was so upset, she dropped her fork. It clanged against the plate and fell onto the tablecloth, staining it with chocolate and whipped cream.
“Look what I did,” she declared, dabbing her napkin in her water glass and wiping at the stain.
“Don’t worry about it,” he said, hating to see her upset. He should have kept his mouth shut. “It’ll wash.”
“No, I was clumsy.”
He stopped her by putting his hand over hers. “Susannah.”
The vulnerability in her eyes wrapped around his heart and squeezed.
“It’s okay. Really. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
She frowned. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable either.”
“I know,” he said, rising from the chair. “Let’s finish eating our cake in front of the fire.”
Maybe a change in scenery would help them relax together again. She nodded, and they both took their plates into the other room.
The tealights were still casting a romantic glow in the den, and since Jake had fed more logs into the fire, there was a nice blaze awaiting them. She sat on the couch beside him, but there was a new distance between them. He didn’t like that. No, not one bit.
“Susannah,” he said softly. “Just because we aren’t going to make love doesn’t mean we can’t touch each other. Would you mind scooting over a little closer to me?”
“Sure.” She inched over to him, but her body was as stiff as an old washboard.
Telling her to relax would only make her tighten up more, so he kicked his legs out and ate his cake, watching the fire, hoping she would settle. This time she didn’t share her enjoyment. In fact, she didn’t eat much more of her cake before setting it on the coffee table.
“I didn’t mean to take away your pleasure in the cake,” he said quietly over the crackle of the fire. “I was only…well…flirting with you. I’m sorry it was the wrong move.”
She blew out a breath. “Our Sunday school teacher always said we needed not to be too enticing is all. That it was hard on men not to…have sex before marriage.”
He set his plate aside and turned to face her. The delicacy of the topic was not lost on him. He needed to choose his words carefully. “I expect it can be hard on a woman as well.”
Her eyes widened. “I hadn’t really thought of that before. But…I guess you’re right. When you kiss me…” Her cheeks turned red. “Well, I shouldn’t say.”
He fought a smile; without trying to, she was being as alluring as she’d been with the chocolate. “Yeah, you’d best not say. At least not right now.” Then he shook his head. “No, heck, I’ve changed my mind. I want you to tell me. We might not be able to make love, but at least we can be honest with each other. Perhaps we’re approaching this all wrong. We’re both adults. I want to make love to you, but I respect your decision. And I’m going to want you when I kiss you and hold you. There’s nothing I can do about that, and I’m not sorry for it.”
Her eyes darkened when he said those words, and he forced himself not to reach for her.
“That’s how I’m made,” he added. “I don’t want that to make you uncomfortable, but the truth is that I want to kiss you and hold you and touch you as much as you’re willing to let me. I’m not going to lie and say that my body is going to like not making love to you, but I’m not ruled by it.”
“I’m glad you can be honest with me,” she said softly, so softly he had to strain to hear her. “It was hard to tell you…and then things got all awkward. I don’t want it to be that way either, Jake.”
He held out his hand to her, which she took without any hesitation.
&
nbsp; “You need to know something,” she said, scooting closer to him. “I meant what I said the other day. I’ve never felt this way about anyone.”
He fought the words resting on the tip of his tongue. It was only their first date. Sort of. She deserved more romance. And deep down he needed to see how things progressed before he told her how deep his feelings went.
“I’ve had feelings for other women,” he confessed. “But I’ve never felt for anyone what I feel for you. I felt it the first time I saw you. Then I held your hand that first time, and…well if I were writing a song, I’d say it was like coming home.” He didn’t mention he hadn’t felt much of home in his life, which is what had made the sensation all the more jarring…and beautiful.
“Would you play a song for me?” she asked. “I…really love your voice.”
“I’d love that,” he said, feeling a smile spread across his face. “Music is a pretty special person in my life. She kind of saved me. Let me grab my guitar.”
When he reached his studio, he selected the first guitar he’d bought after coming to Nashville. That guitar had held all his dreams in the beginning. And then those dreams had come true.
He had new dreams now, ones that involved a life with Susannah. Them raising a family together. Maybe his guitar could help bring those dreams to life as well.
He headed upstairs to sing to the woman who possessed his heart.
Chapter 21
Shelby waited until nine o’clock to call Susannah and tell her that she and Sadie wanted to meet her for lunch. For a moment, she thought about asking Tammy and Amelia Ann to join them, but that might be too much for Susannah. Her sister was feeling delicate right now, so she and Sadie would have to be gentle.
Of course Shelby wasn’t feeling all that gentle. She’d fretted and prayed something fierce over her sister and Jake, and she wanted a praise report, as their church called it. All she and Sadie knew was that their mama had given Susannah and Jake her blessing to be together, and so they’d…no surprise…had a date. Her sister had promised to give more details at lunch.
They met at Husk, one of their favorite places in Nashville. Sadie and Shelby arrived first, and when a waiter showed their sister to their table, Susannah’s million-dollar smile said it all.
“Wow!” Sadie said, hugging her first. “You’re practically glowing. Things must have gone well last night.”
Yes, Susannah looked infused with sunshine, but Shelby could tell it was happiness, not an afterglow. She knew Susannah was still waiting for marriage. Shelby herself had let that ship sail in college with the long-term boyfriend she’d thought she’d marry. They hadn’t, which was for the best, but she’d had to forgive herself for feeling like she’d made a mistake.
Being a preacher’s daughter, she well knew her mama’s opinion on pre-marital sex. Louisa thought it was best to wait, but thankfully was open-minded when people…well, succumbed to the temptation. Shelby had come to believe it was okay to be with someone she cared about. But she didn’t talk about it with her sisters, fearing they might judge her. And Sadie never talked about sex, so Shelby didn’t know her feelings on the subject.
“It’s good to see you so happy,” Shelby said, hugging Susannah when it was her turn to greet her.
“It’s good to feel this happy,” her sister replied, shrugging out of her coat. “Oh, you’ve gotten bread already and that glorious honey butter they have.”
They took their seats, and Susannah immediately reached for the food.
“So…” Sadie said, bouncing up and down in her chair. “Tell us about the date.”
“Yes, tell, tell,” Shelby encouraged.
“Oh, it was like a dream,” she practically cooed. “Jake even hired a chef to make us a fancy meal.”
She proceeded to describe the menu, which made Shelby reassess Jake some. She’d pegged him as more of a simple good ol’ boy, as they’d say, being from Arkansas and all. But it seemed he was adventurous enough to hire a chef to make her sister a special meal.
“I’m impressed,” Shelby said when Susannah finished her story, “but it must have been so disgusting to chew on the shot in the grouse.”
“And you had to spit out a bullet in front of Jake on your first date! You must have been so embarrassed.” Sadie’s eyes were wide as she grabbed more bread and buttered it as thick as a slab of bacon.
“I was mortified!” Susannah declared. “But he was so good about it. Heck, he was good about everything.”
Shelby thought that might be code for Susannah having “the talk” with him, but she didn’t ask. Sadie glanced at her, and she could tell her sister was thinking the same thing.
“That’s great,” Shelby said diplomatically. “I’m so happy it went well for y’all.”
“We need more of this goodness.” Susannah signaled the waiter and asked for more bread and butter.
“Absolutely!” Sadie said, shoving another piece in her mouth.
Shelby tore off a piece and ate it more delicately.
“Don’t give me that look!” Sadie said, nudging her shoulder with her hand. “I didn’t eat breakfast.”
“I was too excited to eat,” Susannah said. “Let me tell you about the candles and the flowers. There were hundreds of them.”
“Hundreds?” Sadie asked with a gasp, reaching for another roll the moment the waiter set the basket down on the table.
Shelby thanked the poor man and told him they’d be ready to order in a few more minutes. From his expression, he obviously feared he was next if the bread ran out.
“Hundreds of tealights and candles in hurricane glasses lined the entryway to the den. And the flowers! You’ll have to come over to my house for some. He piled my car up with so many vases I could barely see out of the back of my Audi.”
“Really?” Sadie asked between bites.
“I’m glad Jake has a romantic side. You deserve it.” Shelby didn’t add “after everything,” but there was no need.
Sadie nodded in agreement.
“He sang to me too,” Susannah said, making circles in the condensation on her water glass with a dreamy smile.
“Shut the front door!” Sadie said, causing a few patrons to look over. “It was like you had a private concert. Personally I would have fainted dead away.”
Sadie could be so dramatic sometimes. Not that Shelby wasn’t the same way. They just weren’t often dramatic at the same time. “Would you let Susannah continue, please?”
Her sister stuck her tongue out, and a woman at a nearby table gasped.
Shelby laughed. “If that woman’s in Mama’s church…”
“She’s not,” Sadie told her with an eye-roll. “I would know her. Can we order now? I’m hungry.”
“No kidding,” Shelby mused, raising her hand to signal the waiter. “The poor man is terrified of us.”
Sadie’s head immediately swiveled in his direction. “Why? We’re just a bunch of beautiful women having lunch.”
“I think it’s the amount of bread and butter being consumed by our table,” she commented, pointing to the second bread basket, which now sat empty.
The poor waiter didn’t make eye contact as he took their order, and he all but grimaced as he asked if they’d like more bread.
Sadie immediately said, “Yes,” and he scuttled off.
“So when are you and Jake seeing each other again, Susannah?” Shelby asked.
Her sister turned bright pink. “This afternoon. More guest bedroom pieces are arriving, and I want to be there to arrange things. Then we’re having dinner again. I can’t wait to see what he’s got planned.”
“Me either!” Sadie exclaimed, clapping her hands only once, thank God. “You’ll have to call or text us to let us know how it goes.”
Shelby shot her a glance. “You don’t have to give us daily reports unless you want to.”
“Thanks for clarifying,” Susannah said with a trace of humor in her voice. “It’s kind of nice to share this with y’all. I’ve�
��never really had it before. No date I’ve ever been on has prepared me for how it feels to be with Jake. I am so blessed.”
“You are blessed, sugar,” Sadie said, grabbing her hand. “Imagine. Dating Jake Lassiter! It’s every woman’s dream.”
“It wouldn’t matter to me if he was our busboy,” Susannah declared. “He’s a good man. Heck, he’s more than good. He’s wonderful, and he’s been through so much to become who he is.”
“We know you love him,” Sadie said, twirling the ends of her hair. “Does Jake feel the same way?”
Leave it to Sadie to go for gold. The server appeared with their food, and they took a moment to thank him before he walked away.
“It’s early yet,” Susannah said, not denying her feelings. “He says he’s never felt this way about anyone either.”
“Wow!” Sadie exclaimed, biting into an asparagus spear. “You’re so lucky, Susannah.”
“I’m happy for you, sugar,” Shelby said, digging into her sweet potato fries.
“Me too,” she said, picking up her burger. “I only hope that between his strength, Mama’s help, and my…well, love, he can move past all the things that have tortured him. He deserves happiness. More than anyone I know after all he’s endured.”
Yeah, that sounded a lot like love to Shelby. As happy as she was for both of them, she’d add another prayer to her list. She’d start praying Jake wouldn’t break her sister’s heart. There were still shadows tormenting him, and she could only hope he’d be strong enough to withstand them.
Susannah chatted on, telling them more about the house and her plans to paint a mural in the dining room. It sounded like Jake was a positive influence about her art, which eased Shelby’s mind a little more.
When they finished their meal, they left the server a hefty tip and headed to the parking lot.
“Have fun with Jake,” Sadie said, kissing and hugging Susannah something fierce.
“He’s worried about taking me out in public because he doesn’t want me to have to deal with the hassles of his life,” Susannah said when she released her.
“That sounds reasonable for a while,” Shelby said thoughtfully, “but it isn’t practical in the long run.”