by Sam Crescent
Seeing Paul, Ryder, and Max had an ache in her chest blooming. The image of Shaun, with his dark hair and eyes, flashed through her mind. The hurt in her heart had her lifting her hand to rub it away, but she stopped right before she made contact with her chest. It had nearly been three years since she had seen him. Before that, his father had brought him around for pack business only. She had loved those times she saw him, even the playful teasing. Brendan had teased her as well, but it had been different, more cruel and heartless. Her feelings for Shaun had been so powerful and different. They had been instantaneous, and she knew he was the one for her. But obviously things didn’t turn out the way one dreamed. Of course she had no chance of ever being with the son of another pack’s alpha. Since her birth she had been promised to Brendan, and there wasn’t anything anyone could say or do about it. With her father being a high-ranking shifter within their pack, her betrothal had been set in stone before either she or Brendan had been a twinkle in their parents’ eyes. The son of the alpha would mate with the daughter of his second-in-command.
Even years later Addie could remember the adolescent touches she had shared with Shaun, and the way they made her feel. They had been innocent in nature, but her sixteen year old body had lit up for the older wolf. Even thinking of it now had her growing warm. She knew her time with Shaun had probably meant more to her than to him, but there was a part of her that wondered what would have happened if she was able to choose her mate. Would Shaun even remember her, or was she just as forgettable to him as she was to everyone else?
Addie needed to stop thinking about the past. It wouldn’t help or change her situation now, so there was no point dwelling on it. She refused to let herself sink deeper into the dark hole she had made for herself. If she let her mind wander down the path of what could have been instead of what her future now held, she would lose it in front of everyone, and she would not let that happen. She had too much pride.
Looking back at the wolves she considered close friends, she smiled in return. Everyone in the pack was close to a point, as was any close-knit community, but Jackson and the others had always been around, the same as Brendan, and treated her as if she wasn’t some prized piece of porcelain to be kept away on the shelf as others did. Compared to them she was tiny, even with her curves. She followed them inside.
The interior was thick with people, and they made their way toward the bar. Jackson stayed behind her while she followed the other three. Lynyrd Skynyrd played through the speakers in each corner of the square room. A dance floor was off to the side, and couples gyrated on the glossed over top to the southern rock song. The crowd of humans parted for them, as if they could sense that these men weren’t really men at all, but lethal predators. Once at the bar, they ordered their drinks. She leaned against the scarred counter and people-watched. She might not like going out into thick crowds like this, but she couldn’t deny that watching humans interact with one another was entertaining. They didn’t seem to have a care or worry as the men threw back their shots and the women rubbed their scantily-clad bodies against them. The scent of sweat, sex, and alcohol thickened the air.
They got their drinks and headed to one of the empty tables off to the side. Once seated, the guys started talking about douche-bag things, which happened to be filled with foul language and a few choice words on the female anatomy. The few times she had hung out with them had resulted in the same conversations. She cut a glance at Jackson who was just as engrossed in the conversation as the other three. Jackson had promised to keep them in line, but he was getting just as sucked into it. When it was clear she wasn’t going to get his attention or steer the conversation into something a little less vulgar, she stood.
“Where you going?” Jackson stood as well. It was crazy how he could look right past her when she sat right next to him, but as soon as she went to leave he was on the alert. She didn’t know if it was a big brother or wolf trait, but it did put a smile on her face.
“Bathroom.” He raised a brow, and she tilted her head to the side. The restrooms were less than ten feet to the left, close enough that they could still see her. Growing up a female amongst male shifters was something she was used to. The males tended to take control, but in the end Addie couldn’t lie and say it didn’t comfort her. Knowing that she was cared for had her heart swelling. It helped, albeit a little, to make the depression that had started to settle into her lift.
She headed to the bathroom, knowing the four of them still at the table watched her intently. She could sense their eyes on her, and the feeling only went away once the bathroom door shut behind her. A few women stood at the mirror. They applied a thick layer of gloss and teased their hair before they left. Addie went to the sink and washed her hands, which didn’t need washing. She splashed some water on her face and stared at her reflection. What was she really doing with her life? The thought of being tied to a male that she didn’t care about scared the shit out of her. She had talked to Brendan enough times and knew just about everything there was to know about him. They had grown up together and gone to the same school. They had even gone out on a few awkward dates as teenagers, but there had never been any chemistry between the two of them. But since graduating high school, which had been almost three years ago, they hardly talked.
Breathing out, Addie dried her face with a few paper towels and tossed them in the trash. In all honesty, Brendan had changed. He wasn’t the goofy boy who had chased her around with snakes hanging from sticks, or pinched the backs of her arms every time he walked by. Since his transformation hit in his late teens something inside of him had changed. His anger was always right under the surface, ready to be unleashed at the drop of a hat. There was no doubt that his transformation had made him unstable, which was rare but could still happen amongst their kind. It seemed the whole pack either looked the other way, or seriously had blinders on. No one noticed, and if they did, they just patted him on the back and said it would make him a ruthless alpha. She was sick of thinking about it, worrying about what would happen when it was time to tie herself to him.
She pulled the bathroom door open and stepped out into the hallway. A female moan had Addie turning her head and looking toward the dark corner by the fire exit. Her heart stopped, but not because the couple were all but screwing ten feet from a room full of strangers. Everything around her stilled because her soon-to-be mate currently had his tongue wedged down some blonde’s throat. There was no denying it was Brendan, not when the tattoo of their pack’s crest in the center of his back was visible through the white of his shirt. The circular insignia, which was unique and worn by only the males of her pack, was like a bitch-slap to the face. If that wasn’t enough of a confirmation, the tattoo on his right bicep that declared him a future alpha of their pack, shone like the neon sign outside the bar.
She wanted to move, she really did, but it was like watching an accident. She couldn’t tear her gaze away from the wreckage. Of course Brendan sensed her, because she couldn’t be lucky enough that the stench that filled the bar would hide her. Disentangling his tongue from the busty blonde, he didn’t bother removing his limbs from hers, just looked over his shoulder at Addie. His eyes flared, and he let his gaze travel up and down her body. She felt naked under his drunken stare, and it was clear Brendan was toasted. His pupils were dilated, and the odor of alcohol that came off of him could be smelled from where she stood.
“Didn’t think the virgin would be slummin’ it with the townies.” His voice was slurred, and she bristled at the tone. It had been a good while since she had spoken to him, and now it was just awkward. “If you want, I can break you in before the night of our mating? It’ll make it more enjoyable for you, less painful.” He let his eyes travel down her body again. He grinned at her, all straight white teeth that reminded her of the dangerous wolf he really was. “Although I can’t say it won’t hurt every time, sweets. I do like it a bit rough.” She felt dirty under his glazed-over stare and at his words. This was not the boy she ha
d grown up around. The male in front of her was a ruthless animal that only cared about his own needs. There was something deep inside of him that had broken. Whoever stood before her, propositioning her like she was some kind of whore, was not the Brendan Marston she knew.
Not bothering to respond, Addie fled to the safety of the night. She needed to get away from the suffocating press of bodies around her. She heard Jackson and the other guys calling her name, but she didn’t stop, couldn’t. She felt like such a fool as tears slid down her cheeks. This was never going to work. She refused to be tied down, especially to a male like Brendan, and she would make sure it was known. It didn’t matter whom she pissed off in the process, Addie was finally going to stand up for herself.
Chapter Two
Addie had sure grown up nicely. Shaun recalled her running around the forests while he’d been visiting with his father to her pack. Before she’d turned eighteen he’d spent hours chasing her with Brendan. After she’d turned eighteen, the precious little wolf was forced to stay inside, protected in order to preserve her precious virginity. No other man or wolf was allowed to touch her, and not even her brother’s friends were allowed near her. He despised the pack rules and wished there was something he could do to change them. Once Shaun was no longer allowed to see her, his visits to the Northern Mountains ceased. He only went if his father ordered him to. Scenting Addie on the wind and not being allowed to see her was a nightmare. Putting himself through such torture lost its appeal to Shaun very quickly. The Northern Mountains was a fun place to be as long as you didn’t like civilization, at least if you didn’t like mingling with other people. He liked being around people even though he was a wolf.
Staring at Addie’s retreating back he turned to look at the cause. Brendan went back to sucking face with another woman. He couldn’t believe the man before him was the son of the alpha or that he’d lost Addie’s hand to this man. There was no way Brendan could be alpha. The man was a mean son of a bitch, and Shaun didn’t trust him at all. Addie didn’t know Shaun’s father petitioned the right to her hand. Their mating would have united two packs. Instead she’d been promised to this piece of shit in front of him. The scent of the other wolf repulsed Shaun.
“You got a problem?” Brendan asked, looking up at him. His words were slurred. Walking away would be Shaun’s safest option. Glaring at the other wolf, Shaun made his way to the bar where Addie’s brother sat drinking beer and leering at the women in Steel’s Corner. He ignored the barman and waited for Jackson to notice him. Shaun and Jackson had gotten along fine during the years he’d spent with Addie. Jackson was a good guy, even if he did think with his dick most of the time.
“What are you doing in Northern Mountains?” Jackson asked as he stood to go after Addie.
“I’ve got business to take care of.”
“Does this business have anything to do with trying to take my sister?” Shaun had come clean to Jackson about his feelings for Addie, and it was her brother who asked for him to be considered for Addie.
This week he got one last chance to try to win Addie’s hand before she was given to that rat bastard.
“It sure does. Did you know she caught Brendan sucking face with a slut over there?” He pointed behind him.
“Shit, I didn’t think he’d be out. He’s supposed to be staying in preparing for his fucking mating or some shit. Guys, we need to go and find Addie.” Jackson spoke to his friends before downing his shot. “One night out and I fucking lose her.”
“No, you stay here. I’ll go and talk to her.” Shaun got off the stool ready to go searching for his woman.
“Are you sure? Addie’s not normally around men she doesn’t know. She’s a bit geeky.” Jackson left out the part where it was against the rule for any male to be around her alone, but her brother knew better than to say anything. It wouldn’t have made a difference to Shaun anyway. He did whatever the fuck he wanted to, especially when it concerned Addie.
Shaun smirked. “I like them geeky.”
He waved to the other pack members and then made his way out into the night air. Closing his eyes, Shaun lifted his face to the sky. The scent of sex, beer, and crap food permeated his nostrils, but the subtle fragrance of lemon and the earth filled his senses. Addie wasn’t too far away. He’d scent her anywhere. There were nights he’d lain awake thinking about drowning himself in everything that was Addie.
You’re starting to sound like a pussy.
Following his nose like a dog Shaun found her curled up on a bench with her arms wrapped around her legs. Tears were streaming down from her eyes. The scent of her misery engulfed him. Fisting his hands, he waited until his beast was under control before stepping closer.
Her head jerked as he came into her sight. She glanced up at him then reached up to wipe her eyes. Did she remember him?
“Have you come to gloat?” she asked. Addie stared down at her hands refusing to look him in the face. He remembered a time when all Addie did was look at him. Those times were long gone. They were no longer teenagers and both of them had a responsibility to their packs.
Shaun saw her hands quiver as he took another step toward her. He took a seat next to her on the bench. “Why would I gloat?”
“I remember when we were kids. You always liked seeing me hurt in some way.”
Her remark cut him deeply. “No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did.”
Letting out a sigh, Shaun reached out and grabbed her. He hauled her onto his lap. She fought him a little at first before settling into his lap. Wrapping his arms around her small body, Shaun comforted her the best way he knew how. When he was younger, his mother used to hold him until the bad dreams went away. He’d gladly do the same with Addie.
“Seeing you in pain does not make me happy, Addie. I see you remember me though,” he said.
Her lemon scent was intoxicating. His cock thickened at having her close. Over the years his attraction for this auburn-haired beauty hadn’t diminished. The feel of her body next to him was driving him to distraction. How could Brendan even think of touching another woman when he’d got this sweet morsel waiting for him? Addie was being handed to him on a plate. The lucky bastard didn’t have the first clue of what he was getting.
Take her with you. Make her yours.
Shaun cut off his thoughts. If he took Addie and made her his mate the war between their packs would be a disaster. His family was all about keeping the peace between them.
“Of course I remember you. It’s pretty hard to forget a friend who just ups and leaves you. I thought you’d come back. I didn’t think you’d just disappear without a word?” she said. Her head turned to look at him. “I know the rules, know that you had a life with your pack, but when you never came back, not even to just say hi, I was heartbroken, Shaun.” He was caught in her grey eyes. The instant he got her in his bed he’d have her eyes shooting fire at him. The only howls he’d ever hear from her would be the howls of pleasure as he made her come over and over again.
“It’s the rules. You were promised to Brendan, and I couldn’t see you. Coming by, even to say hi, was just so hard, Addie. There was nothing for me without you to keep me company. Why would I stay around and continue to come by when the reason I visited the Northern Mountains was not allowed near me? It was like a knife being thrust in my chest every time I saw you.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m not saying it was the right choice, but it was the one that was less painful.”
She smiled. Her smile lit up her whole face. Cupping her cheek he brushed the tears from her eyes. “You shouldn’t be crying over that bastard. He doesn’t deserve you,” he said.
“I’m not crying over Brendan. He’s a dick. I know that.”
“What are you crying for?” he asked, intrigued to know.
“I’m crying for me. No matter what I do or say to my dad, he’ll tell me the same old crap. I’m promised to Brendan. I can’t back out of it. I’m supposed to be his mate. It’s unfair.”
> “Spoken like a woman who refuses to fight.”
She glared at him. The rumble of her beast brushed across his skin. Her wolf was angry at him as well.
“I can’t fight what I’ve been told to do.”
“You can fight everything. Addie, you were always a fighter. Do you think he’ll stop fucking around when you’re mated?” he asked.
She shrugged. He hated the defeat inside her. Addie was once a fighter, a firecracker. Shaun would do anything to see the girl he’d known fight for her life, her future.
“I’ll just have to live with it,” she said, climbing off his lap.
He watched for several moments as she made her way back up the mountain. The thick set of the trees obscured her from his view. Shaun didn’t need his eyes to find her. His sense of smell was enough. Closing the distance between them Shaun tugged her arm forcing her to turn and face him.
“You’re going to live with it?”
“I don’t care. I don’t love him, and I’m doing what I’m told.” Addie made to turn away from him again. The movement incited his anger. Shaun was bigger and faster than Addie. He moved in front of her stopping her from leaving. “You’ll live with it. Addie, you’re a wolf,” he said.
“So, what does me being a wolf got to do with anything?” She made to go around him.