by Anne Baker
‘Darling June,’ he said. He drew her inside, pushed the door shut and took her into his arms to kiss her. Ralph was very romantic.
His big drawing room looked absolutely gorgeous. He’d redecorated and fitted it out to look very gracious. All his furniture was ultra-modern, he didn’t care for the old stuff Pa liked. June had helped him choose the turquoise satin curtains that hung from ceiling to floor at the big windows. He had a tea tray set and the cherry cake she loved all ready for her.
‘Don’t eat too much of it,’ he cautioned. ‘I’ve booked a table for dinner at the Central Hotel.’
He had a little kitchen but he didn’t like cooking. Sometimes she cooked a simple meal for them, but Ralph liked taking her out to restaurants and pubs. He let her try wine and cigarettes and gave her money to buy clothes which she couldn’t take home or Mum would want to know where she’d got them. She felt sorry for the girls she’d known at school. She’d grown up and left all that girlie stuff behind.
After she’d had her tea she snuggled into his arms on the sofa and kissed him. It hadn’t taken her long to let him make love to her, she hadn’t been able to help herself. At college the girls spoke of going ‘all the way’ as though it was a huge divide. All girls were given to understand they must never allow that, not until they were married. Pa would kill her if he knew but having done it once there seemed no point at all in depriving themselves of the thrill of it.
Ralph was raining kisses up and down her neck, on her throat and across her shoulders until she had to satisfy her craving. She took him by the hand and led him to his bedroom. Unfortunately his rooms didn’t connect and they had to go out into the hall which was used by other people to reach his bedroom, so it didn’t feel very private. It was a nice room too. He kept the heavy curtains closed here and had a black and gold satin eiderdown on his bed and pictures of tigers on the walls. She kept the clothes he bought her in the big wardrobe with his own.
They spent an hour or so under the eiderdown. June loved to feel his body against hers, while he told her how much she meant to him. This was the time she enjoyed most. Then she crept to the cold and ugly shared bathroom while Ralph picked out the outfit he wanted her to wear. She felt very sophisticated in a dress and coat that even Mum would think was high fashion, and most of all she loved her high heels.
Ralph drove into the town centre and parked close to the hotel. She took his arm as they went inside. He told the receptionist they had a reservation for the restaurant. ‘We’d like to eat straight away,’ he said.
They were being escorted to their table when he stopped. ‘Er, no.’ He half turned to June and she felt herself being backed out of the restaurant.
‘What’s the matter?’
He was drawing her towards the reception desk. ‘Sorry,’ he said to the girl manning it. ‘Cancel our reservation for dinner tonight. Something’s come up, we can’t stay. Sorry.’
He bundled June back into his car. ‘Whatever is the matter? You look as though you’ve seen a ghost.’
‘Elaine was there. Tom too.’ He mopped his brow with his handkerchief. ‘But I don’t think they saw me. Anyway, they couldn’t have seen you. I turned round and shut off their view. Elaine would give me hell if she knew about us. We’ll go to New Brighton and get well away from them. We’ll find somewhere to eat there.’
Up till now, June hadn’t worried about being seen with Ralph. Her parents didn’t go out to eat and most of her old friends couldn’t afford to go to the places Ralph chose.
There were several big hotels along the seafront. By the time they’d been shown to a table, Ralph had recovered from his shock and was laughing at their lucky escape. He ordered champagne to celebrate and June had never enjoyed an evening more. She had to go back to Ralph’s rooms to change her clothes. She loved his car and it was what made it possible to keep the deadlines Pa set.
It was only a few minutes after ten when Ralph drew up at her garden gate. He was in a more serious mood now. ‘I’ve been a fool,’ he told her. ‘I earned myself a reputation as a divorced man who preys on young girls, and I set out to do it all over again with you.’
June laughed and pulled him closer to kiss him. ‘I can’t believe that. You knocked me off my feet the moment I set eyes on you. You’re loving and kind and generous and I adore you.’
‘I should have had more sense than to let you meet me without your parents knowing. They’ll hate me if they find out. I want you to know that what I feel for you is completely different. I’ve never felt so deeply in love with anyone before.’
June found it very hard to tear herself away from him, but she had to observe Pa’s rules. Her parents were in the living room talking about the coming war yet again.
Pa asked for about the hundredth time, ‘Have you made up your mind, June, about what you want to do? There’s a job advertised in tonight’s Echo that might—’
‘No,’ she said. ‘I can’t think about the war now.’ She couldn’t stand any more of this tonight. ‘Goodnight, Pa, goodnight, Mum.’ She rushed to her bedroom.
June knew that Ralph was afraid the war could bring this golden interlude in their lives to an end. It was unsettling, and unfair. She hated the very thought of war, and she knew her parents were even more scared. They’d lived through the last one.
Later that week Ralph Harvey drove home from the bank looking forward to seeing June again. He’d got through three empty evenings when he’d gone home wondering how to fill them. June couldn’t meet him as often as they would both have liked. She touched all his senses, he could think of little else but her beautiful face.
He wanted to end his man-about-town, bachelor life. Searching for girls and having a good time in restaurants and bars was no longer what he wanted. It had never been as much fun as it was cracked up to be. He wanted to settle down and marry June. Perhaps he’d grown up at last; it had certainly taken him longer than most to do it. The odd thing was, June had always seemed more mature than he was.
He let himself into his drawing room and she shot into his arms, radiant and laughing with sheer pleasure at being with him again. The way she greeted him warmed his heart, made him realise how lucky he was to have her.
She’d known what time to expect him and had a tea tray waiting for him set with a chocolate cake which she’d bought on the way because she knew it was his favourite.
Perhaps they didn’t go out so often now, perhaps they were spending more time in his rooms where June sometimes cooked a meal, but as usual they enjoyed their tea. Then because he couldn’t keep his hands away from her they ended up on his sofa. When they could wait no longer, he took her to his bedroom.
An hour or so later, with all passion spent, Ralph raised himself up on his elbow to look at her. Her lovely fair hair was spread across the pillow. ‘You’re very beautiful,’ he told her, ‘and you’re the sweetest, loveliest person I’ve ever known.’ She smiled up at him. He collapsed back against his pillow. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘What for?’ He could hear the laugh in her voice. ‘I want you to think I’m beautiful and a lovely person.’
‘I have a lot to apologise for. I’m no saint, June.’
‘You’ve told me that before. I know I’m not the first girl you’ve had in your life.’
‘I hope you’re going to stay with me for ever. Will you marry me?’
‘Of course I will. There’s nothing I want more, but—’
‘I know.’ He took her into his arms again and pulled her close. ‘I realise now how stupid I was to earn myself the reputation I have.’
‘You like young girls, what’s wrong with that?’
‘Some would say I abused young girls.’
She gave a little laugh. ‘You’ve never abused me.’
‘I have. I lusted after you from the moment I set eyes on you. I went all out to get you. I knew it was very wrong to take you to theatres and hotels and keep what we were doing a secret.’
She kissed him and clung closer. ‘Was
there any other way?’
‘I should have found one. If I’d known I was going to fall deeply in love with you, and how important you were going to be to me, I’d have gone about bringing you into my life in a very different way.
‘For a start, I should never have allowed you to keep our meetings secret from your family. It meant you had to tell lies to explain where you were going. It reduced our love to a furtive affair and both our families will see it like that.’
She was taking him seriously at last. ‘But what can we do about it now?’
‘I’ve asked myself that a hundred times. I’ve got us into a bit of a predicament, haven’t I?’
‘It was what I wanted too.’
‘I can think of no easy way out now. The fact is, it would be very difficult to pretend to Elaine and your parents that we’ve only just met without inventing a whole new tissue of lies.’
‘We’ll have to think of some way.’
‘I’ve really tried.’
‘Then we’ll have to carry on as we are until I’m twenty-one. We’ll get married then.’
‘June! That’s still three years off,’ Ralph said, ‘and I’m afraid we’ll be at war long before then. I want to look after you forever, but I’m afraid I’ll get called up.’ He’d explained before that men were being called up in age groups. He was thirty-three now and so far his turn hadn’t come, but it would. ‘We won’t be able to go on like this. I’ll be forced to leave you.’
He took her shopping to buy an engagement ring. ‘I want you to have something to remind you while I’m away that you are engaged. I want you to trust me.’
‘I do, I don’t need anything to remind me.’
She chose a sapphire with a small diamond on each side of it, and then he had to buy her a fine gold chain so she could wear it round her neck and her family wouldn’t see it.
What a fool he’d been. He’d been taking June out and about for over two years now. If only he’d gone about this in the right way, both their families would have accepted that they were in love and wanted to spend their lives together.
CHAPTER TWELVE
AMY WAS ON HER long summer holiday but one morning, her mother told her she was going to take her to school the next day.
‘I’ve been going by myself for years,’ she scoffed but the moment she saw the haversack come out of a cupboard, she knew why. She was scared and wouldn’t let go of Mum’s hand on the journey. The school was quieter than Amy had ever known it. She was handed over officially to a teacher she didn’t know and her name checked off a list.
‘I’m Miss Cosgrove.’ The teacher smiled brightly at both of them as she tied a label with Amy’s name and address to a button on her coat. ‘We’ll be setting off soon and I’ll be coming with you. We’ll have a bus ride and then a train ride. Won’t that be nice? We’ve got your luggage, yes. Have you brought your gas mask and a packed lunch?’
‘This is my gas mask.’ Amy wore it as recommended, swinging from a string round her neck so it bumped against her stomach. Mum had covered the cardboard box with red Rexene to keep it dry. She’d made hundreds of them for other people in the shop. ‘And this is my lunch.’ She held up the brown paper bag.
‘Excellent,’ said the teacher. ‘Say goodbye to your mother and then wait in the hall until the bus comes.’
With a determined smile on her face, Mum led her by the hand to the doors of the school hall. ‘Now I want you to be a good girl,’ she said. ‘Do as you’re told and don’t forget to write to me and post it as soon as you can.’
‘Yes, Mum.’ Amy could feel butterflies in her stomach.
‘You’ll have an exciting time, you’ll see. You’ll enjoy it.’ She gave her a hug, pecked at her cheek, then pushed her into the hall and walked briskly away.
There were other children there, some from Amy’s class. They sat on the floor in subdued groups until another teacher wheeled in a trolley loaded with picture books, slates and chalks and encouraged them to amuse themselves.
Amy picked up a slate and, like many of the others, drew matchstick figures of Hitler. Then she rubbed the slate clean and drew another of herself waving goodbye to her family. She didn’t want to say goodbye to them. It wasn’t butterflies she had in her stomach now but an aching void.
As the hall filled up, it became more like a normal playtime. Amy watched the other children inspecting their packed lunches and sampling them. She opened hers up and bit into an egg and lettuce sandwich.
They started running about squealing and screaming and some even started sliding on the polished parquet floor, a practice strictly forbidden and punished heavily when caught. Today nobody came to stop them.
They were all bored and impatient before they were herded into coaches and bussed to the railway station. To Amy, the train journey was more of a novelty, though she had her misgivings when she saw the streets she was used to give way to fields and woods and hills. The journey seemed to go on forever and they all grew bored again. With her packed lunch long since eaten, Amy, like most of them, was hungry.
At last the train stopped in a small town, they got off and were counted again and led to a nearby school in a two-by-two crocodile. In the hall there, tables had been arranged as they were for the school Christmas party. Each place was set with a paper cup of lemonade and a paper plate with a currant bun and two biscuits. They all fell on the welcome feast.
After that they were let out into the school yard but by then they were tired and had had enough of the great adventure. Full of trepidation, Amy saw they were being picked out and sorted into groups. Miss Cosgrove took Amy and seven others, checked off their names on yet another list and marched them towards a line of waiting cars. The children were all squashed into the back of a big one. Three adults sat in front.
Moments later they were chugging up a country road along the floor of a wide valley. To Amy, it all seemed very strange. She huddled closer to the other seven girls and one boy; she was subdued now and plagued by worries. She felt she’d been pushed out of the world she knew, parted from her loved ones and could see no way forward into the new safe world Mum had promised. One of the girls started to cry and the boy told her to shut up. Amy wanted to go home, she thought they all did.
The car slowed, pulled off the road and stopped. Amy could see no building for what seemed miles around but a man and a woman were waiting. The adults got out to talk to them, one with his clipboard. Amy could hear them talking but couldn’t understand a word. She knew they were speaking Welsh because Wales was where her family went for their holidays.
She sat back to wait as she’d done so many times today, but then she noticed her haversack was being taken from the boot and set down on the grass verge. Suddenly her heart began to pound. A brown paper carrier bag was set down beside it and the back door of the car opened. The man with the clipboard beckoned her to come out.
She cringed back, not wanting to leave the children she’d come with, but was half lifted out and handed over to the strangers. Amy was engulfed in panic as she watched the car drive away, but the woman took her hand in hers. She was small and dumpy with kindly eyes. Amy couldn’t take her eyes away from the cherries on her black straw hat that slid about as she moved her head.
‘Hello,’ she said in English. ‘You’ll be staying with us and you’re very welcome. You can call me Auntie Bessie.’ The man with her kept smiling at her and took charge of the carrier bag and her haversack. Amy relaxed a little, Mum needn’t have worried, she hadn’t had to carry her haversack at all.
‘I’m Uncle Jack,’ he said, relieving her of her gas mask. ‘There is our house.’ He pointed upwards and Amy glimpsed a white building high up on the hill, half hidden by a belt of fir trees. ‘We have to walk from here.’ She found their accent difficult to understand.
Auntie Bessie led the way through a picket gate. ‘We call this the cwm,’ she said. The path was so narrow they had to walk in single file. A stream rushed down bubbling and frothing and the path clim
bed steeply away from it up the side of a deep gulley filled with trees, some enormous and some shrubbery sized. After a while, they crossed a wooden bridge over the stream and went into a field.
It was the steepest field Amy had ever seen. ‘This is our land, we call it the sideland,’ she was told. There were outcroppings of granite and gorse in the short slippery grass. Her hands were taken by Auntie Bessie on one side and Uncle Jack on the other. They asked her questions about herself and her family and about where she lived. In between they spoke in Welsh together, but soon they were puffing and pausing to get their breath.
Sheep moved away as they advanced, two Hereford cows and two calves stared stolidly at them as they passed. Uncle Jack told her that he’d finished the evening milking so Amy knew she’d be staying on a farm. Now the climb was levelling off and they were in another field where there was better grass. They were high up on the side of the valley and Amy could see for miles, the views were magnificent and took her breath away.
A dog started to bark. ‘Be quiet, Fly,’ Jack shouted and at the sound of his voice the dog stopped barking.
They passed an area of closely planted fir trees and then were in the farmyard. A black and white long-haired sheepdog was leaping about on the end of a long chain and wagging his tail. Amy liked dogs and took a few steps towards him.
‘No,’ Jack said. ‘He’s a working farm dog and he’ll think he’s a pet if you make a fuss of him. I don’t want you to play with him.’
They went through another picket gate on to a tiled terrace. The farm buildings were of black weatherboarding and attached to a pretty whitewashed stone cottage. Amy sniffed at the smell of wood smoke.
‘Come in, bach,’ Bessie told her. Indoors, a fire burned red in a Victorian kitchen grate, with a stool on either side. The polished steel fender reflected the glow and that and a large homemade peg rug were set in a cosy recess.
Jack poked at the fire until it burst into flames and lowered the large black kettle on its chain to swing over the fire. Immediately it began to sing and a pot of tea was set to brew. Amy stared round.