by Amy Sumida
“Wait,” I held up a hand. “I just forgave you. That doesn't mean I'm ready to be intimate with you again.”
“Your eyes tell another story,” he smiled.
“Stop it,” I got out of bed. “I need some time to think this through. If I talk to Raza, and that's a big 'if', then I will do it alone. I don't want you up in his face about this.”
“I want you back,” Tiernan's face settled into determined lines, “and I won't stop until I have you.”
“Fantastic,” I shook my head at him. “You go from cold bastard to stubborn bastard. Just lay off, Tiernan. There's a lot going on right now. I-”
He reached up, grabbed my hand, and pulled me back down beside him. Without another word, he kissed me. Hard. Deep. Passionately. His scent enveloped me, and it all came surging back. Us. Tiernan and I together. Zings like electricity ran down my legs. Shivers coasted over my skin. Muscles clenched. I felt dizzy, and yet so very focused. My hands knew the feel of him and wanted more. Sweet Danu, I had missed him.
“You were right, Seren,” Tiernan whispered after he pulled away. “You deserved more from me. I'm ready to give it to you now. To love you more than Danu herself. Forever.”
“Isn't she with the dragon-djinn?” Eibhleann's voice broke the spell, and I surged away from Tiernan.
“Damn it, Tiernan,” I pushed out of bed again. “Why is it always the worst timing with you?”
“Is it?” Tiernan lifted a pale brow. “Or is it perfect timing? I think maybe it's always been perfect timing.”
Chapter Seven
Killian arrived shortly after Tiernan made his declaration about perfect timing. I feel like there's some irony in that.
“Seren, you're okay,” Killian let out a relieved breath. Then he set his annoyed stare on Tiernan. “A scry would have been nice.”
“Did you catch the elves?” Tiernan shot back.
“No, they disappeared,” Killian huffed.
“Fucking elves,” Tiernan swore.
“Whoa, T-man, I don't think I've ever heard such language from you before,” Killian chuckled. “It's refreshing and disturbing all at once. Kinda like hearing your grandma swear.”
“I've heard him swear before,” Bress grimaced. “Usually in reference to you.”
“Oh, that must be why I haven't heard it,” Killian nodded sagely. “When Tiernan says my name, I automatically tune him out.”
“Are you finished?” I asked Kill.
“Sorry,” he grimaced. “I was worried. It's made me a little mouthy.”
“You must get worried a lot,” Bress muttered.
“How did you find me here?” I asked Killian.
“My superior powers of deduction,” he shrugged. “I twilighted over to your castle, found out you weren't there, then twilighted here before dusk ended. I figured this would be the closest sanctuary to the SF rath.”
“He's not as dumb as he looks,” Tiernan smirked.
Cat huffed noncommittally.
“Did you just use 'twilight' as a verb?” Bress lifted a dark gray brow.
“Well, what do you call it?” Killian asked.
“Treading the In-Between, walking the worlds, tripping-”
“The light fantastic?” Killian finished for him.
Bress frowned.
“I think I'll stick with 'twilighting' and all its tenses,” Killian grinned.
“You're a buffoon,” Bress rolled his eyes.
“Oh yeah, speaking of me being a buffoon, you're gonna wanna scry your father,” Killian said to me. “He might be just a tad concerned.”
“At least he knows he's a buffoon,” Tiernan huffed. “That's a start.”
“Killian,” I groaned. “What did you say to him?”
“I was rushing,” Killian whined. “Dusk was dwindling. I didn't have time to get specific.”
“So what did you tell the Twilight King about his beloved, only child?” Tiernan growled.
“I may have said you'd been shot, and I had to go find you,” Killian gave me a pained expression. “Whoopsie.”
“Damn it, Kill-” I started.
“My crystal ball is upstairs,” Aideen cut me off. “Why don't you scry King Keir, Your Highness?”
“Thank you, Aideen,” I said.
I cast Killian a dark look before I headed up the twining stairway which ran along the tree's trunk. Cat accompanied me, casting her own angry looks at Killian as she went. The next floor up was a bedroom, and one of Raza's guards was just getting out of the bed.
“Your Highness,” he stood. “I'm relieved to see that you're healed.”
“Thank you, Balasi,” I said. “Have you recovered?”
“Yes, I'm feeling very well, Princess,” he smiled. “Ready to return to my king. Are the others up yet?”
“Not yet. Why don't you go downstairs, and have something to eat?” I suggested. “It's already dark out. Better to head out in the morning.”
“Is His Majesty downstairs?”
“No, he's already returned to Unseelie,” I said. “King Raza had to confront the dark elves.”
“Of course,” Balasi nodded. “Are there any more of the King's Guard here, or am I alone?”
“Two others are here,” I reassured him. “But either way, you wouldn't have been alone. And by the way, I want you to know that I support what you and the rest of Raza's Guard did. You kept him safe, and that should be your priority.”
“Thank you, Princess,” Balasi gave me a smile, and headed downstairs. I heard him mutter as he left, “I just hope my king feels the same way.”
I went to the crystal ball, set on a little pedestal in the corner, and called out my father's name. Keir's anxious face filled the curved surface within moments.
“Seren,” Keir's tone was relieved. His face pulled back from the ball as he took a seat. “Thank Danu.”
“Yeah, sorry about Killian,” I rolled my eyes. “He speaks without thinking sometimes.”
“No, I'm glad he said something,” Keir scowled. “Otherwise I wouldn't have known that anything was wrong. Now tell me, what happened?”
“We were attacked on our way out of the SF Council House,” I pulled a chair over, and settled into it. “They were using elf-shot, Dad.”
“What?” Keir's amethyst eyes went round. “So Moire has the elves on her side.”
“Yes.”
“That is unfortunate.”
“You're telling me,” I grimaced. “I wasn't the only one who got shot, but I was the only one it nearly killed.”
“It poisoned your human blood,” Keir's jaw clenched. “Devious of her. You were given suvanis in time?”
“Yes, thanks to Lady Eibhleann.”
“Aideen's mother?” Keir perked up.
“Yes,” I cocked my head at him. “Why did your voice do that?”
“Do what?” Keir's face went blank.
“That thing where it goes up a little,” I pointed at him. “You like her.”
“She's a lovely, oak dryad,” he said stiffly. “Very talented with her healing magic. I've tried to hire her for Gentry, but she refuses to leave Fairy.”
“I don't blame her.”
“Nor do I,” Keir sighed. “Please extend my gratitude to her.”
“I will,” I promised. “Raza has headed back to Unseelie. He's going to check-”
“On the elves,” Keir finished for me. “Yes, of course. When you speak to him, ask him to scry me.”
“Alright,” I said. “Why? Do you know where the elves are holed up?”
“Not in San Francisco, no,” Keir frowned. “Though something feels off about that. Did the Head Councilman have any news regarding Moire?”
“There were a few sightings,” I nodded. “And an incident with elf-shot and a human.”
“Moire elf-shot a human?” Keir asked.
“A few actually.”
“That makes no sense,” Keir's frown deepened.
“Bress said something similar about Moire shooting me,” I offered.
“That although she wouldn't mind seeing me dead, she wouldn't strain her relationship with the dark elves to kill me unless it was important.”
“No, she's too shrewd for that,” Keir agreed. “The Thorns have always been known for their cunning.”
“So why would she risk it?”
“She must have another reason for wanting you dead,” Keir said grimly. “Though I can't fathom what it could be.”
“Great,” I sighed, “now I don't even get to know why I'm being targeted.”
Cat whined.
“I think you've forgotten one other, very terrifying reason for Moire to not kill you,” Keir gave me a pointed look.
“The Sluagh,” I whispered as if saying their name too loudly might summon them. “That's right. She can't kill me or the monsters of Fairy will come for her. It doesn't matter which realm you're in, you can't hide from the Sluagh. I think I know that better than most.”
“Yes,” Keir's jaw clenched. “So how exactly did she think she was going to get away with it? And why haven't the Sluagh already been summoned? If she instigated that attack, they would know, and they would kill her for it. Since they didn't kill her, we must assume that the one condition for killing a fairy royal has been met.”
“Danu damn it all,” I let out a deep breath. “We really are at war.”
Chapter Eight
“So, you two are cool now?” Killian asked.
I was up in Aideen's balcony, the highest point in the house. If you could call a hollowed out, living tree a house. Which in Fairy, I believe you could. The top floor was more like a roof-top garden. It had a short wall of trunk around it, then a fringe of lush branches. The branches did nothing to hinder the amazing view, but as it was night, the view above me was just as impressive as the bird's eye view of the Twilight Forest around me.
I'd gone up there to hide after my disturbing scry to my father. I needed a little time alone to decompress and think. At first, it had just been Cat and me. Then Killian had come looking for me and found me stretched out beside Cat, staring up at the breathtaking, Fairy sky while Cat took yet another nap. Stars in fairy just seemed to sparkle brighter. Maybe it was the lack of city lights or the lack of pollution. Whatever made the night sky clearer, I appreciated it.
“What two?” I looked over to where Killian was laying down beside me on the smooth wood.
“You and Tiernan,” Killian made a face. “The guy treats you like shit for months. Then he does his job, and suddenly, he's Mr. Perfect again?”
“Who said he was Mr. Perfect?”
“Mr. Perfect did,” Killian grimaced. “He told me you'd worked out your issues.”
“Well, he did just take an arrow for me,” I noted.
“As if I haven't fought beside you in worse,” Killian huffed. “And I wasn't under any oath to do so.”
“You stood beside me against a fairy king,” I whispered. “I won't ever forget that either.”
“And I followed you into Fairy,” he added. “I couldn't let you face Uisdean alone.”
“I know, Kill,” I reached down and took his hand. “And if we had been at odds before it, that would have smoothed things out between us. Just as Tiernan's actions have put him in a better light. But I hope you know how much you mean to me.”
“Why don't you remind me?” Killian's voice went low, heading for dangerous zones.
“Don't do that,” I let go of his hand.
“Oh, you can make out with Mr. Perfect, but not me?”
I looked at him in horror.
“Aideen,” he said by way of explanation.
I groaned and covered my face with my hands.
“That's going to get back to your boyfriend,” Killian said. “The dragon.”
“Yes, I know who my boyfriend is,” I muttered through my fingers.
“Do you?”
“Tiernan kissed me, not the other way around,” I kept my hands up. “But I should have stopped it. I should have slapped him or something. It was just so stupid.”
“It's not stupid,” Killian pulled one of my hands away from my face. “It's love.”
“Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference.”
“Yeah, I hear ya,” he gave a long sigh. “You know I love you, right?”
The words caused a shiver to slide through my stomach. I did know, or at least had suspected, but hearing him say it, so simply, was a different matter entirely. Instead of arguing or chiding him for putting me on the spot, his candor made me answer in kind.
“Yeah, I know,” I whispered.
“But you don't feel the same?”
“I don't know what I feel for you,” I continued with the honesty. “But I don't want to analyze it because it's moot. I can't be with you.”
“Are you going back to Tiernan?”
“No,” I clenched my jaw.
Why did it hurt so much to say that one tiny word?
“But you want to,” Killian set his gaze on the stars and kept his tone casual.
“I love Tiernan, but he hurt me pretty bad,” I took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I forgave him awhile ago, I did, but the wound is still there. It still aches. And now I love Raza. The dragon crept up on me, and he dug his claws in deep. I can't betray him. Not ever.”
“If it didn't mean I'd never hold you, I'd admire that,” Killian whispered.
I looked over to him, considering his profile. It was rare for Killian to be so serious, and it made him seem like an entirely different man. Times like this made me wonder how much emotion Killian buried beneath his sarcasm and snark.
“What if you talked to Raza about this consort thing?” Killian turned to face me. “He was willing to accept Tiernan before. Why not me as well? It's not like we'd all be living together.”
The world shifted abruptly for me, and I had a golden glimpse of what my life might be like if things were really that simple. Raza in Unseelie, Tiernan in Twilight, and Killian in HR. A man in every port. I nearly snorted. From princess to pirate.
“As if you'd be willing to share me,” I huffed, pushing away my traitorous thoughts.
“To have you, Seren,” Killian swallowed hard before starting again. “To be with you, I would do anything.”
“Killian,” I shook my head.
“Anything,” he said more firmly. “Even share you with a dragon.”
“That dragon isn't willing to share anymore,” I said. “And it would have only been with Tiernan anyway, because Tiernan would be a bond to Seelie, and through him, we could unite the kingdoms.”
“I could be your connection to the witches,” Killian smirked. “Doesn't Raza want peace with them as well?”
“Yes, but,” I frowned. Something was tickling the back of my mind. “You're not exactly a witch anymore. Not entirely. You're a twilight fairy.”
“And you already have Twilight covered,” he said grimly. “So there's no room for me?”
“I'm sorry, Killian,” I said gently, “but I don't think it's possible.”
“Anything's possible,” Killian smirked, his mask firmly back in place. “So long as you're true to yourself and what you really want.”
I gaped at him. How did he know to say that? And on this particular night? Right after Danu had said nearly the same thing, and Tiernan had asked to be my consort. What was going on? Killian winked, kissed me on the forehead, and left before I could gather my thoughts enough to question him.
I stared up at the night sky, feeling as if I was tumbling through it. Twilighting without a destination.
Chapter Nine
I hardly slept that night. Guilt over allowing Tiernan to kiss me shivered through my limbs, making them restless. And then there was Killian. If I did as Danu asked, and was completely honest with myself, I'd admit that I cared deeply for Killian. But I wasn't ready for that kind of honesty yet. There were bigger truths ruling my life. Dragon-sized truths.
I needed to tell Raza about the kiss. I'd kissed Raza once while I was still with Tiernan,
and I hadn't told Tiernan right away. Now the situation was reversed, and I had learned from my mistakes. I would tell Raza as soon as possible and banish this shadow which had settled between us. I even headed for Aideen's crystal ball a few times in the night, but I kept turning away when I was halfway there. I couldn't tell Raza over a scry. That seemed unfair to him. I had to give him the respect of telling him to his face... so he could slap mine.
No, Raza wouldn't do that. That was more Tiernan's thing. Oh Goddess, that was a horrid truth. Tiernan had hit me, and although I forgave him for it (and had done my own slapping), I wasn't able to forget. Still, there was more to us than one mistake, and I missed him. You know, they call it heartache, but you never think that's truly what it feels like until you experience it. Real heartache. The loss of someone you love. It really does become a physical pain, an ache inside your chest, and if you're not careful, that ache can spread. It can poison your whole life.
I rubbed at my sternum through most of the night.
I woke my Star's Guard, Cat, and Bress before dawn. I was going to twilight over to Unseelie. Damn, but Killian was right, the word worked as a verb. Anyway, they all insisted on joining me, as I assumed they would. All except for Tiernan, whom I hadn't woken. I was leaving him behind because I knew it would be better for his health in so many ways. Mainly, he wouldn't be within roasting distance of a certain dragon-djinn when I confessed to our kiss.
But Tiernan woke on his own, his hunter senses alerting him, and came racing out of the tree to confront me.
“You can't come with us, Tiernan,” I said gently. “Go home to Twilight, and please let my father know where I've gone.”
“That's not happening,” Tiernan said stubbornly.
“She can't take you with her, dumb ass,” Killian was lounging against Aideen's tree, waiting for dawn so he could twilight back to HR. He'd woken on his own too. “The dragon would make you into a marshmallow.”
“You're going to talk to Raza?” Tiernan asked with wide, hopeful eyes.
“I'm going to confess to him,” I corrected. “As I should have done with you once.”
“Why? It seems fair play that it's done to him,” Tiernan's hopeful eyes narrowed.