by Linda Ford
Dolly refused to speak before so many strangers.
Then it was Beatrice’s turn. What could she say that wouldn’t invite ridicule? But before she could speak, Emma did.
“This here is a nice ranch. How big is it? How many cows you got? Never mind. We’re going to Idaho, where Pa has his sights on farming. ’Course, we’ll have to work hard to make it succeed but one thing us Bagleys is good at is work. We know how to work. That’s for sure.”
Beatrice kept her gaze on the table in front of her. She dare not look at Levi for fear she would see him all calf-eyed at Emma again after her passionate speech.
Two of the Bagley boys talked about snaring gophers.
Beatrice felt Dolly’s shock and wanted to cover her ears against the gory details the Bagleys provided. She’d cover her own, too, but wouldn’t give any of them the satisfaction of seeing how she felt about the story.
Thankfully the meal and the sharing ended.
“Emma will help with dishes,” Mrs. Bagley said. “Thank you for the nice meal.” And with that the Bagleys trooped from the house.
But Beatrice couldn’t relax. Not with Emma suddenly rushing around, stacking dishes right where Beatrice meant to put the dishpan, then shoving all the pots and pans into a corner almost as if she wished they could be forgotten.
Beatrice took her time about filling the dishpan and starting the dishes. Perhaps Emma would get bored and take herself elsewhere. Big Sam carried Maisie into the other room. Dolly took her cat and slipped outside. Beatrice hoped she wouldn’t go too far away but then she never did.
“You don’t know much about farm life, do ya?” she asked, taking a wet plate from Beatrice. “You a city girl?”
“I am.”
“Huh. I guessed it.”
Beatrice steadily washed dishes, offering nothing in way of conversation.
Finally the last dish was washed and dried and put away.
“Thank you for your help,” Beatrice said.
Emma had her hand on the doorknob. “I could tell ya needed someone with experience.” She left without a backward look.
Beatrice filled her lungs slowly and deeply. She grabbed the slop bucket and headed for the pigpen, welcoming the chance for fresh air.
Only after she was within smelling distance did she laugh at the idea of finding fresh air while feeding pigs.
She dumped the bucket’s contents over the fence. Not anxious to return to the house and the possibility of encountering any of the Bagleys, she lingered to watch the pigs shove their snouts into the food. Pigs had no manners. People should, though, but she would not let unkind thoughts fill her mind and instead turned to watch the activity in the yard. Three cowboys sat on the bench under the verandah roof of the bunkhouse. Soupy leaned against the wall of the cookhouse, smoke clouding around him as he puffed on his cigarette.
She couldn’t see the Bagleys’ covered wagon from where she stood, but glimpsed one of the boys in the area. The others would likely be preparing their space for the night.
She knew Big Sam to be in the house with Maisie. A movement toward the barn caught her attention. Emma walking with purpose.
Beatrice stayed where she was, not moving, wondering if she would be noticed. But Emma had her sights fixed on the corrals closest to the pigpen. Why was she interested in them? Then Beatrice caught a flash of black. Like Levi’s shirt. She watched closely and detected another movement. Levi hiding? She grinned at the possibility. She could have warned him he couldn’t hide from a girl with such determination as she sensed in Emma.
The girl slipped through the narrow opening at the gate. “You waitin’ for me to find you?” She giggled. “Here I am.”
“I wasn’t waiting for you. Just looking for some time alone.”
Another giggle. “You’re joshin’.”
A beat of silence.
“How come you say you aren’t getting married? You’re good-looking and all.”
Beatrice did not want to be privy to this conversation and looked around for escape, but any movement would draw their attention to her. They’d guess she’d overheard them. She drew back against the fence, wishing she could be invisible.
“I got other plans.”
Beatrice tried to decide if Levi sounded dismissive or uncertain. Maybe a girl like Emma would cause him to reconsider his attitude about marriage.
“Maybe you could change your plans. Pa could always use another man to help start a new farm.”
Beatrice could almost picture Emma batting her eyes and trying to be coy.
“It kinda looks to me like you could use a woman around here with some experience. That city gal isn’t good for squat.”
All sense of gentle persuasion disappeared when she spoke of Beatrice.
Beatrice held her breath. How would Levi respond? Not that he didn’t agree. Nor could she. She was inept with the work expected of a ranch woman.
“She’s managed fine so far despite the challenges. I wonder how we would function in her world?”
Beatrice smiled. He’d defended her.
Emma made a rude sound. “Who’d want to live in a city and be a sissy? Not me.” Her voice changed. “I don’t think you would, either. You’re a farm boy. I could tell that right off.”
“You might be right. I belong here on the ranch. Don’t have any plans to change that.”
“Why? You a mama’s boy?”
Beatrice came away from the fence. How dare she? She sank back. She would not be the one to explain Levi to Emma.
“I am who I am.”
Beatrice grinned at the dismissive tone of Levi’s voice.
Emma’s voice turned syrupy again. “I might persuade ya to think of leaving the ranch.”
Beatrice couldn’t see enough to know for certain that Emma had moved closer and maybe tried to get Levi to hug her, but she followed the black of his shirt and knew he had stepped away in rather a rush.
“Fine. Ya don’t need to think yer the only good-looking man in this here country.” Emma flounced out of the corral and marched to the Bagley wagon and out of sight.
Beatrice held her breath as Levi followed slowly and at a distance. He stepped out of the pen and looked around.
She tried to disappear into the wood of the fence, but it was impossible. She could only hope he wouldn’t notice her.
But he looked steadily in her direction and then closed the distance between them.
Her cheeks burned. She’d been caught eavesdropping, though it had never been her intention.
He stopped ten feet away. “You heard everything?”
“I heard enough.”
He shuddered. “That young woman scares me.”
Beatrice tucked the knowledge into her heart, though she failed to acknowledge why it should please her. “She’s very beautiful.”
“I fear her looks are only skin-deep. She practically threw herself at me.”
Beatrice grinned. “I didn’t mean to spy but I couldn’t help but see how you backed away from her.”
“I would have run except I was penned in.” He saw the empty slop bucket and picked it up. “Come. I’ll walk you back to the house.” He draped an arm about her shoulders and they walked with matched steps.
She understood he only did it to keep Emma at bay, but it nevertheless felt as if she fit right there. The thought had no business exposing itself. It did not belong in her world. She would continue with her plans...
She couldn’t quite remember what the plans were.
* * *
Levi could not say what possessed him to put his arm around Beatrice. Yes, he hoped Emma would see them and realize he wasn’t interested in her. But it wasn’t Emma that had his heart thudding against his ribs. It was Beatrice. He hadn’t realized she hovered nea
rby when he spoke to Emma, but it pleased him that she had overheard. He wanted her to know Emma held no interest for him. Never would he have the urge to pull her close like he did as he walked across the yard with Beatrice.
He tried to remember all the reasons he knew he should be fleeing such thoughts.
Why Beatrice shouldn’t stay on the ranch even after Maisie’s leg healed.
They reached the house and he set the slop bucket down and stepped away from Beatrice. His side, where she had brushed against him as they walked, grew suddenly cold, but he would not pull her back to that spot.
He was getting far too used to having her around. Growing to enjoy her presence, her smile. Learning to look forward to her comments that made him chuckle. He’d like to see her reaction to the cathedral of the trees, to the birth of baby calves and foals, to—
She wasn’t staying. She wouldn’t want to even if he asked.
She had other plans and so did he. He reminded himself what they were—guard his heart. He quietly, firmly closed the wobbling doors of his heart.
“Ma, Pa.” The youngest Bagley boy trotted by the house toward the Bagley wagon. “Lookee what I found.”
Mr. Bagley plucked something from the boy’s hands and held it aloft.
“It’s the kitten.” Beatrice picked up her skirts and headed for the wagon.
Levi followed on her heels.
“It’s too little to be any good to anyone.” Mr. Bagley made to toss it aside just as Beatrice reached him and grabbed the kitten.
“It’s mine.” The boy lunged at Beatrice but she stepped aside.
“How can it be yours when it’s on this property?” Beatrice demanded, cupping her hands over the yowling kitten so no one could take it from her.
The Bagley family gathered together in a tight group.
“It weren’t in your barn or nothing, were it?” Morgan asked.
“Nah,” young Ray said. “It was out there all alone and lost.”
Beatrice took another step back right into Levi and then eased forward so they didn’t touch. He didn’t move and remained right there to back her up. He didn’t care for the ugly expressions on every one of the Bagleys.
“That kitten belongs to Dolly. She must be out there somewhere.”
“I didn’t see no Dolly girl. You ought to thank me for rescuing it if it means so much to ya. Instead, sounds like yer accusing me of stealing.”
Mr. Bagley’s stance widened and his fists went to his hips. “My boys ain’t thieves.”
“’Sides,” Morgan added. “That little cat ain’t big enough for anything. It’ll die, sure.”
“It will not.” Beatrice hurried toward the house with the kitten.
Levi looked from one Bagley to another. Emma scowled at him as fiercely as the others. Having no wish to antagonize any of them further, he followed Beatrice.
She went around the house. “Where’s Dolly? Did that boy frighten her into hiding?”
She didn’t wait for an answer, which was a good thing because Levi had none she would like.
“Dolly, Dolly,” she called. “Listen.”
He listened. Heard nothing.
“That boy scared her.” She rubbed her cheek against the kitten, tears filling her eyes.
He trailed a finger along the kitten’s back. His knuckles brushed Beatrice’s cheek. He pulled his hand aside and rubbed it against his leg, which did nothing to slow the tingling that swept up his arm.
“We have to find her.” Beatrice turned away, the kitten held close to her heart. “Dolly. Dolly. We have Smokey. She’s safe and sound. Where are you?”
He grabbed her hand as they searched for the child. After several futile minutes he pulled her to a halt. “We’ll never hear her. I wonder if Smokey knows where she is. Put her down and let’s see.”
Beatrice looked dubious. “What if she disappears, too? How would we explain that to Dolly?”
He could not guarantee the kitten wouldn’t run off. “I have another idea.”
“I hope it’s better than the last.”
He chuckled. “Me, too. Why don’t we make Dolly come to us?”
She stared at him like he had two heads. “How do you suggest we do that?”
“Watch and listen.” He turned toward the trees. “Dolly, Smokey is here looking for you. Can you hear her meow?”
Beatrice raised her eyebrows, definitely doubtful this would work.
He grinned. He’d heard a faint rustle and guessed—hoped—it might be Dolly. “Meow, meow. Smokey wonders where Dolly is.”
Beatrice rolled her eyes. “If you think she’ll believe that’s really Smokey—”
He nudged her and pointed to a spot a few feet away. “What do you see?” he whispered.
“Dolly.” She rushed forward and pulled the child into her arms. Poor Smokey would be crushed. But she didn’t seem to mind and licked Dolly’s teary face.
Levi knelt down beside them and wrapped them all in his arms. Never mind that he meant to keep a healthy distance from Beatrice.
She turned glistening eyes to him. “I didn’t think you knew what you were doing. Thank you.” She tipped her head up and kissed his cheek then withdrew. Her eyes conveyed surprise and something more...a feeling that echoed in his heart. As if this was where he belonged.
The earth stood still.
And then Dolly pulled Smokey into her arms. “That bad boy took him from me. Said he would hurt her.”
Levi tried to bank back the anger that rushed up his throat. He pulled Dolly into his arms. “That boy won’t hurt your kitten again.” Or poor defenseless Dolly. He got to his feet and drew Beatrice up after him. “Let’s get you all back to the house.”
And then he had something to do so he could keep his promise to Dolly. He would tell the Bagleys they had until morning to leave. Pa and Maisie would stand by him once they heard the truth.
The truth. What was he going to do with his own truth?
He lengthened his strides, forcing Beatrice to trot after him.
The truth of what his heart wanted warred with the truth of what his experience told him.
Which was he to believe?
Chapter Fifteen
Beatrice fled to her room and closed the door behind her. Thankfully, no one witnessed her hurry and Dolly seemed as anxious to reach the safety of the bedroom as she. She leaned against the door and pressed her fingers to her lips. What had she been thinking to kiss Levi’s cheek? Only that she was relieved Dolly was safe. But gratitude did not begin to describe her reaction. Never before had she felt such a jolt in her heart. A bolt of happiness that made her insides dance. Yes, he’d kissed her once before, but her initial reaction had been surprise. This time was different. This time she’d made the first move, been deliberate, but she had not been prepared for the response that raced through her.
Somehow she must get her reactions under control before she saw him again.
Telling herself he would never let himself care for her didn’t help as much as she’d like.
She helped Dolly prepare for bed. Dolly insisted on story time, as usual.
Beatrice usually told her a Bible story. This time she told about Ruth. She simplified the story for Dolly but she couldn’t help thinking her life was like Ruth’s in that she had gone to an unfamiliar land. From there, their stories went in opposite directions. Ruth was accepted and honored. Ruth became a wife and mother. Beatrice would continue her journey alone.
Dolly’s eyes drifted shut. Beatrice put her into bed and tucked the covers around her.
Restless for answers to her longings, she opened her Bible. Reading from the Book of Matthew where her bookmark held her place only caused her disquiet to increase. Oh, God, speak to my hungry, restless heart. She flipped the pages of her Bibl
e seeking an answer. The pages fell open at Psalms 138. She read it. Then read it again and again. “The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me: thy mercy, O Lord, endureth forever.”
She pressed her fingers to the verse. “Lord, You know what concerns me.” She tried to think specifics but her mind rattled with so many things. And her thoughts circled again and again back to Levi. His black hair, his all-seeing dark eyes, the way he lounged against a fence as he watched an animal, the feel on his fingers against her thumb, the roughness of his skin as she kissed him.
“Lord, do not forsake me.” That wasn’t what she meant. “Make me strong to do that which I must do.” She closed her Bible, put it on the table next to her bed and prepared for the night.
She did not belong in this world. Wasn’t even sure she was welcomed in it, though Maisie appeared to appreciate her help. She’d found being independent more of a challenge than she imagined possible and she didn’t mean solely the tasks she felt totally inept to manage. Her heart had proved to be even less manageable.
* * *
She woke the next morning to the rattle of a wagon in the yard and leaped from bed to glance out the window. The Bagleys were leaving. She couldn’t say she was sorry to see them go. Sounds of activity came from the kitchen. She groaned. It had taken hours to fall asleep last night and now she’d overslept. From the voices reaching her, she knew everyone else was already there. She wakened Dolly and helped her dress, then slipped into her own dress, brushed her hair hurriedly and wrapped it in a careless bun. No time for fussing this morning. She dashed to the kitchen. Maisie sat in her chair. Big Sam handed her a cup of coffee. Levi stood at the stove.
His gaze slipped to her hair. Already she could feel strands falling from the bun, but she resisted an urge to reach up and tidy it.
“Sorry I overslept. I see the Bagleys are leaving.” She should not have mentioned the fact.
Levi and Big Sam exchanged looks.
“They’re in a hurry to get to Idaho.” Big Sam sounded amused. “Especially after I suggested they should be.” He chuckled. His gaze dropped to Dolly, who headed for the door with her kitten. He waited until the door closed behind her. “I won’t tolerate that kind of behavior here.”