by M. L. Spann
“How are things with you?” I asked, forcing myself to return some semblance of polite banter.
“They’re okay. My first game is coming up, so I’m a little nervous about it,” he mumbled.
You could cut the tension in the air with knife and it was starting to get to me.
“He’s not my boyfriend,” I whispered. “I don’t owe you an explanation or anything, but … I thought you should know.”
“Thank you, Bri, and you’re right, you don’t owe me anything. I appreciate your honesty though. We don’t have to talk about that anymore, okay?”
I flexed my feet and tried to think of something else to say in order to keep the conversation going. Even though I accidently answered the phone, I found it increasingly difficult to end the call.
“How’s the baby? Do you know what it is yet?” I asked.
He sighed, but it sounded more like a growl. “No. Vivianne’s being really weird about the whole thing. She doesn’t even tell me about doctor’s appointments until after the fact. Actually, she refuses to discuss baby names or anything. In fact, I call bullshit on this whole thing. Too many things aren’t adding up.”
“Wow, so you think she’s faking it? I wouldn’t put it past her but until you know for sure just give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she just needs time to adjust,” I suggested.
“Oh, she’s adjusting just fine. She’s adjusted to spending every dime I make on designer clothes and shoes. And she’s managed to alienate herself from all of the wives and girlfriends of my teammates by being an absolute nightmare. I’m locked in a prison and she has the key. You don’t know how happy I am to actually hear your voice,” he said.
“Thanks … I actually feel the same way,” I said in a rush. “Keon is planning a party for your first game.”
I hoped he would take the hint and change the subject. The last thing I wanted to do was get ensnared in a conversation about our feelings.
“Yeah, he told me about it. I hope you’re able to make it,” he said. “My break is over, I need to get back to practice. I hope I’m able to talk to you again sooner rather than later.”
“Okay, I’m sure that won’t be problem,” I lied.
“Bri?”
“Hmmm?”
“I still love you.”
I wanted to respond, but he ended the call before I had the chance.
Way to twist the knife in my chest. I don’t need you to love me … I need you to let me go so I can do the same.
Chapter Thirty-Two
I finally had lunch with Darren and it turned out to be an everyday event. Being with him helped take away some of the loneliness. The one thing I admired about him the most was his sense of humor. I found it impossible to be around him and not smile.
“So, Bri, tell me about this guy that’s keeping me from getting to know you better?”
He propped his head up on hands and waited. I wasn’t prepared to really answer that question and nearly choked on the food in my mouth
“W-what? We are getting to know each other,” I coughed.
“No,” he said slowly. “I’m in the friend zone. Don’t get me wrong, you’re an excellent friend to have, I’m just curious to know if I have a real shot or not.”
“I’m sorry,” I muttered.
He waved his hand and dismissed my apology. “Don’t be sorry, and don’t feel pressured to go to the next level with me. We’re just making conversation. So go on, tell me all about him.”
I took a deep breath and started at the beginning with my weight and unemployment issues all the way to the present day. Darren even made me whip out my phone to show him proof of my waist size.
“Humph,” he said. “That is some serious drama right there. Don’t take this the wrong way … but I don’t think you should be mad at the guy.”
“What?” I asked in disbelief.
Everybody’s on Jayce’s side, even the guy who doesn’t even know him.
Darren smiled and shrugged his shoulders. “If I were in his shoes, I’d do the same thing. I’d rather work on things with my child’s mother if possible rather than go through a nasty custody battle. Based on what you’ve described I don’t think his child’s mother is the cooperating type of woman. He’s just trying to keep the peace.”
“But where does that leave me? Out in the cold, tossed to the side,” I snapped.
“Give him some time, you never know how things will turn out. I still want to hang out with you though. Things will happen when they’re supposed to.”
I reached for my phone to check the time and noticed several missed calls from both Keon and Kirsten.
“Excuse me just a second, my friends have been calling me back-to-back and I need to see if anything is wrong.”
“Do you need some privacy?” he asked.
“No, this shouldn’t take long.”
I dialed Kirsten’s number and waited. “Hey, Kirsten, what’s going on? You and Keon are blowing my phone up like something’s wrong.”
“Something is wrong! Where are you, did you forget about the party today?” she snapped.
“Crappp,” I moaned. “It totally slipped my mind.”
“Bri, get here now! Keon is about to blow a fuse and Jayce keeps texting too, and he’s not even supposed to have his phone right now.”
“Kirsten, I can’t come right now, I’m with Darren,” I hissed.
“What’s wrong?” he whispered.
I tapped the mute icon on the phone while Kirsten started ranting about my absence. “I’m supposed to be at my friend’s house. My ex, the guy I was just telling you about, is playing his first game and we’re supposed to be watching.”
Darren’s eye lit up. “Seriously? Aww man, do you think they’ll mind if I tag along? I was just sitting here trying to think of a way to convince you to watch the game with me. I love football.”
“Really, Darren? You wanted to blow me off to watch football?” I laughed.
“Blow you off? No, my plan was to invite you to watch, and then ignore you while I shout at the TV.”
I rolled my eyes and hit the unmute button. Kirsten was fire-red mad and shouting into the phone.
“Hello!” she shrieked.
“I’m here. Calm down, I’m on my way. Ask Keon if he minds Darren coming over to watch the game too.”
“Sure, fine … whatever. Hurry up please!”
She ended the call and I rolled my eyes at the phone. “I don’t know if I mentioned this before, but my best friend is dating my ex’s cousin. He’s the one throwing the party,” I said.
“That’s cool. I hope there’s some chicken wings and beer, I can’t watch football without those,” he said. “Well let’s go, it’s almost game time.”
He seriously just goes with the flow.
Darren parked in front of the house and I struggled to get out of the car. This was the first time I’d been inside since Jayce left. I felt jittery and nauseated all at the same time.
Why am I so nervous? He’s not even in there. Calm down, Bri … just calm down.
“You okay?” asked Darren.
“I’m fine,” I said, trying to swallow the lump in my throat.
I eased out of the car and knocked on the front door. A shirtless Keon, with a towel around his shoulders, snatched it open and wrapped his arms around me tightly. I was positive I’d end up with bruised ribs from his hugs.
“Why the hell are you knocking on the door? You know you can come right in,” he said.
I could tell the instant he noticed Darren because his whole body tensed as he put me back down on the ground.
“Hi, I’m Darren, Bri’s friend,” he said, extending his hand out.
The moment was tense and awkward as we all stared at Darren’s hand. I wanted to shake his hand my damn self just so he could put it down.
“A man is extending his hand to you,” he said, his voice rumbled through my body making me feel even less at ease.
A look of surprise glossed over
Keon’s face and I prepared myself to duck so I didn’t end up in the middle of their brawl.
Instead of exchanging punches, Keon gave a lazy grin and actually shook Darren’s hand.
“What the hell?” I whispered.
“It’s a military thing. Come in and get settled,” said Keon.
It’s a military thing? Did I miss something?
I stepped past him and looked back with my brow furrowed. Kirsten looked equally confused as she placed the platter of chicken wings on the table.
“You brought him here?” she whispered.
“Kirsten, I told you to make sure it was cool with Keon, remember?”
Her lips twisted as she crinkled her nose. “Hell no I don’t remember, because I’ve been dodging hot grease all day. I had to fry this chicken all by myself.”
“Aww, friend,” I said, leaning on her shoulder. “I’m sorry, but seriously I forgot all about the game today.”
“Mmmhmm. I’m just happy Keon didn’t punch the guy in the face or something. They seem to be hitting it off somehow,” she said, nodding in their direction.
It was odd seeing them engaged in deep friendly conversation. I felt like I was observing new animals at the zoo. One second Keon was ready to spit on the man’s hand and the next second they were hamming it up like new best friends.
I poured myself a drink and got comfortable on the couch. Darren walked over with a beer and a plate of food perched on top of it.
“We just ate,” I said, shocked at the amount of food he’s scarfing down.
He devoured two wings, licked his fingers, and smiled. “I told you I need chicken wings and a cold beer before I’m able to effectively watch the game.”
Keon plopped down with a similar setup in his hands. Both guys elected to sit in the recliners in the living room and not the couch. Kirsten and I exchanged frowns as they smacked their food and slurped their beers.
“What number is Jayce?” I asked.
“Number ninety-six, defensive tackle,” said Keon.
“Oh,” I said.
Kirsten cut her eyes over to me and shrugged.
Yeah, I don’t know what any of it means either. I guess we’ll cheer when the guys cheer. All of the players look the same to me.
I couldn’t even begin to put the pieces of football together. One dude had the ball, another one threw it, and then everybody tried to knock the other person down. By the time Jayce took the field, I was a little tipsy and ready for a nap. But the cheers and yelling from the guys snapped me out of my downward spiral into sleepy land.
“W-what happened?” I asked.
“It’s Jayce, he’s about to do whatever it is that he does,” whispered Kirsten.
We quickly learned early on in the game to whisper any questions or comments, or wait until a commercial break. Apparently, men can’t focus on sports and answer questions at the same time.
I perked up a little and tried to focus on the TV. It was weird seeing Jayce again and not being able to touch him. It sucked I couldn’t be there to hug him after the game and help him unwind. My eyes stay glued to his jersey as they ran play after play. For somebody who didn’t want to play professional football he was really good at what he did. Seeing him run and block was actually turning me on. I should have been paying closer attention to the game overall but I’d only managed to zero in on his lower body. The tight material of his pants made his ass look great, and the thought of what I knew he was sporting in the front was enough to make me squirm in my seat.
He was running again and those strong powerful legs moved lightning fast. Suddenly those same legs were knocked out from under him, and a pile of men the size of commercial buses were on top of him. The play was over and the men slowly got up one by one. Jayce was on the bottom of the pile, and we all waited for him to get up. We waited … and then we waited some more.
My chest tightened and I jumped up off the couch. “He’s not moving, why isn’t he moving!” I shouted, looking around the living room.
I searched the faces in the room for answers, but no one answered. Kirsten’s hand covered her mouth as she blinked away tears, and people from the sidelines rushed onto the field.
No … no … no, this can’t be happening. People get hit in football all the time. That’s the whole basis for the fucking game. Jayce is going to get up.
They cut to a commercial just as the medics made it to him.
“Oh my God,” I muttered over and over.
“Bri,” said Keon slowly. “Calm down, injuries happen in football. This isn’t unusual, okay?”
“He wasn’t moving, Keon!” I shouted.
“We have to wait, Bri. If there was somebody to call right now I would. We have to let the medical personnel do their jobs. Jayce is in good hands, just be patient,” he replied.
My legs refused to support my weight any longer and I collapsed onto the couch.
What if he’s paralyzed or has some type of brain injury? What if he has internal bleeding and the doctors don’t find it in time?
My foot tapped against the floor and my stomach cramped in knots. Just sitting there doing nothing was killing me.
My breath froze in my lungs mid-exhale as the screen cut back to the game. The players were back in formation minus Jayce. The announcers quickly glossed over his injury and went back to detailing the game plays.
I needed to know how he was doing. I was desperate and the only solution I saw in sight was to call Vivianne. “Keon, do you mind calling Vivianne? She probably won’t tell me anything if I called.”
“I can try,” he muttered. “She’ll likely ignore me too.”
He dialed her number and waited. After a few tries back-to-back with no answer, he decided to send a text message.
“We’ll have to wait for her to respond,” he said. His voice was low and teemed with doubt just like my inner thoughts.
Please don’t let that spiteful bitch be heartless enough to ignore Jayce’s family calling to check on him.
The game continued and we stared at the TV quietly. I wasn’t sure about everybody else in the room, but I was hoping and praying they gave some kind of update on his condition. But everything ended without them giving us a kernel of information.
“Maybe we should call the hospital?” suggested Kirsten.
Darren leaned over with his elbows planted on his thighs. “They won’t give you any info on how he’s doing. Bri, I need to leave so I can get ready for work, but I don’t want to leave you like this.”
“I’m o-okay,” I stammered. “You need to go to work.”
“It’s cool, man, we’ll take care of her. Grab a plate to take with you and give me your number too,” said Keon.
Darren reached over and gave my knee a gentle squeeze before following Keon to the kitchen.
“He’s going to be fine,” whispered Kirsten.
I wanted to believe her, but I wasn’t so sure of anything anymore.
Chapter Thirty-Three
I ended up falling asleep on the couch with Keon and Kirsten around me. We still didn’t have an update and Vivianne hadn’t offered any type of response either.
“Can one of you take me to the airport?” I asked.
Kirsten raised up a little from her spot on the couch. “The airport? For what?”
“I have to go check on him. Waiting is no longer an option for me,” I said, putting on my shoes. “I’m going to find out what I need to know.”
“Let’s wait a couple of hours. I’ve been talking to my aunt and she should have an update on Jayce real soon. If we don’t hear anything by then I’ll take you to the airport myself,” said Keon.
I wiped away the stray tears that started to fall. Unlike before, these weren’t sad tears, but angry ones. I was pissed off to the highest level possible.
“That miserable bitch could send a text and tell us something. Pregnant or not, I want to punch her in the face,” I fumed.
“I know exactly how you feel,” muttered Keon.
“All right,” I said, shouldering my purse. “I’m leaving one way or the other.”
Keon jumped up, slipped on his shoes, and grabbed his keys. “I’m a man of my word, so let’s go.”
“Wait,” said Kirsten, scrambling toward the door. “Are you seriously going to the airport? Bri, you can’t just show up where the man is and expect to get answers. His psycho baby mama is there and I refuse to let you go to jail for hitting a pregnant woman.”
“So does that mean you’re coming too?” I asked.
“Damn straight I’m coming too. I can’t let you go to jail by yourself,” she laughed.
“You two are absolutely crazy,” said Keon. “But I guess it’s only right if we make this duo a trio. Nobody plans to pack any bags?”
“Nope,” we answered in unison.
We arrived at the airport and it suddenly dawned on me, we didn’t exactly know which hospital to go to.
“Guys, I know we probably should have hashed out the details before we bought our tickets, but how are we going to actually find Jayce?”
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it,” said Keon. “Hopefully my aunt responds to me before we land.”
I settled back into my seat and waited for the plane to get into the sky. Just as the seatbelt light popped on, Keon grabbed his phone.
“Hey!” he yelled. “Jayce just text me.”
I snatched the phone out of his hand and read the message.
Jayce: I’m all good. A little banged up.
My fingers started moving faster than my mind could process what to type.
“Ma’am, I need you to put your cell phone away,” said the flight attendant.
Naturally, I ignored her until my own phone started buzzing. I answered and brought my trembling hand up to my ear.
“Jayce,” I sighed.
“Hey, babe,” he said. His voice was strained and he sounded like he was in pain.
“Ma’am, we can’t take off until you turn off your phone,” snapped the flight attendant. We proceeded to have a staring contest as I continued my conversation.