by Emerson Rose
“No, but I will tonight if you think it’s better.”
“I wanna sit with Sasha,” Tori says interrupting and holding her arms up. Sasha scoots over, and I pick Tori up and sit her on the table.
I continue looking at my work turning her chin from side to side. “Yes, you should be past any severe pain by now.”
“To be honest, I think I only take it to relax and sleep.”
I pull my head back and look into her eyes. “You can’t sleep?”
“Not since the wreck. I can’t sleep when I’m worried.”
“I can give you something for sleep if you need it.”
“No, I don’t want to take any more pills.” No, I don’t have any insurance or any money is more like it.
“I have some samples from drug reps if you change your mind.”
“Thanks, that’s okay. I don’t like medicine.”
“Daddy, you made her so pretty,” Tori says getting up onto her knees next to Sasha for a better look. Sasha smiles and taps Tori on the nose affectionately.
“Thank you, Victoria, that was very nice of you to say,” Sasha says. She remembers her full name. Tori mentioned it when Sasha was under anesthesia, but I didn’t think she’d remember it.
“Nobody calls me that.”
“It’s a beautiful name. So is Tori, though. I like them both.”
“I got another.”
“A middle name?”
“Uh-huh, wanna know it?”
“Sure.”
“It’s Serephina. Daddy says it was his mommy’s name, but I never met her.”
“Wow, that’s so beautiful, Victoria Serephina Sullivan. I love it, truly I do.” Tori is positively beaming with pride. I see love swimming in her eyes for this stranger, and it causes me to do something rash and unplanned.
“Sasha, will you be Tori’s nanny for a couple of weeks?” I blurt out. Tori’s eyes practically pop out of her head before she starts squealing. “Oh yes, please, please, please. Be my nanny till my Zion comes home!” she gushes.
I know it’s wrong and unprofessional to ask in front of Tori, but I don’t give a shit. These two are magic together, and I can’t let today be the last time I ever see this woman.
“Sorry, I probably should have asked in private, but you mentioned not having a job and needing a car, and I think we could help each other out. Her nanny is out for at least another week, and when she comes back, she will need some help as well for a while. I have a car you can drive, and the job pays great.”
Sasha is stunned and speechless. She sits looking back and forth between Tori and me, and for a moment and just when I’m worried she’s about to decline the offer, she agrees.
“Yeah, sure, why not?”
“Yay!” Tori yells, and I mentally high-five myself for being a brilliant fucker.
“Perfect, do you have anything going on this afternoon?” I ask.
She shrugs and lifts her eyebrows. “Nope, not really.”
“I only have one more appointment, and I’m done for the day. You can come home with us, and I can show you around. You’re welcome to go back and forth between home and our house if you want, but it’s probably easier for everyone if you just move in.”
“Move in? Like, live with you?”
“Yes, I run at 4:30 a.m. every morning, and I need someone there with Tori while I’m gone.”
“Oh, uh, okay, then yeah, I guess it makes sense to stay at your place.”
Tori’s shaking with excitement, she can hardly contain herself. “We can go swimming and watch Dallas and read books and play with my little ponies…”
“Okay, bug, settle down. We are going to have to show Sasha around and let her get her things. There will be plenty of time for all that later this week.”
“Dallas? Like the one from the 70’s?” Sasha asks.
“Yes, she and her nanny, Zion, have a strange obsession with the show.” I shrug apologetically.
“That’s so weird. Dallas and Knot’s Landing were my mom’s favorite shows when I was little. I’ve probably seen every season.”
Good God, that makes me feel old. When she was little? How old is Sasha anyway? I watched those shows, too, but not in syndication.
Tori takes Sasha’s hand and holds it up to her cheek. “We’re gonna be friends.”
Sasha smiles. “Yep, I think you’re right. You’re a cool kid, Victoria, and we are gonna have lots of fun.”
Sometimes life hands you lemonade instead of lemons.
9
Sasha
I started my day hopeful, but by noon I was jobless, carless, and soon-to-be homeless. Then Dr. Xander Sullivan came along and solved all of our problems in one fell swoop.
I don’t know much about kids. I’m an only child, and I was never the babysitting type. But I’m not worried at all. Tori and I click. And who could ask for a better job than kicking it with a kid all day for a hefty paycheck, a place to live, and a car? I’d be an idiot to pass that up.
Now I’m hanging out in the clinic’s break room coloring with Victoria and waiting for her sexy daddy to finish work so we can go home. Twyla’s going to freak when she finds out I’m moving out, but when I tell her I lost my job, she will understand. Hell, what am I thinking? She’ll probably pack my bags for me. She’s been rooting for me to hook-up with the doctor since day one.
“Ladies, are you ready to go home?” Xander asks from the door of the break room. He put a stop to me calling him Dr. Sullivan this afternoon and insisted I call him by his first name.
“Sure, one second while we clean up. Victoria, will you put the Crayons in the box while I get a folder for our pictures?”
“Uh-huh,” she says nodding her head. “I made this for you, Daddy.” She holds up the superhero-coloring book she’s been coloring in to show him a picture of Superman.
“That’s amazing, bug,” he says taking the book from her to have a closer look. I like the way he pays attention to her work. He takes his time looking at it. When I was little, my mom could hardly tear her eyes away from her soap operas long enough to look at anything I’d made.
After only a few hours, I know without a doubt that Xander is a great parent. He may have hired me spontaneously, but he’s cautious and responsible. Proof of this came when he asked if I would mind having a background check done before taking me home tonight. I agreed, of course. I have nothing to hide—well, nothing he can find anyway.
“She’s quite the artist, and I’m not just saying that because you gave me a job.” He looks up, and I wink at him. I’m not a winker, never have been, but something about this man brings out the flirt in me.
He narrows his eyes looking intently at me, and for a second, I think he’s pissed, but then he winks, too. My insides melt, and a bolt of electricity tickles low in my belly. My God, if a mere wink can do that, what would a touch or a kiss do?
I shake the thought free and remind myself that I am working for him and caring for his child not pursuing a relationship. How screwed up would that be? Move in, fall in love with the boss and his sweet little girl, put their lives in danger, and get dumped when the real nanny comes home. No, that’s not how this can go.
I’m going to do this job to the best of my ability, earn a nice chunk of change, and move on. I don’t belong in his world.
“I’m hungry,” Victoria whines, and Xander picks her up.
“Let’s go home and have dinner then. Pizza okay with you, Sasha?”
“Sure, pizza’s good.”
Victoria drops her head back looking at the ceiling. “Hurry, Daddy, hurry,” she says dramatically as if she waits another moment, she will surely perish.
“All right, princess. Sasha,” he says gesturing for me to go ahead of him. I take the lead and listen to them chatter about what kind of pizza is their favorite until we are in the parking lot.
“This is us,” he says stopping next to a sleek black Bentley SUV. I don’t know much about cars other than where the key goes and how to pu
t gas in the gas tank, but even I can tell this car is very expensive.
He holds the passenger door open for me, and I slide in on the buttery leather seat. He shuts the door and rounds the vehicle to put Victoria in her seat. I look back and smile at her as she wiggles and protests about being buckled in. I didn’t know kids her age sat in a safety seat. Shit, I would have put her in a regular seat with a seatbelt. I need to do some research on child safety, so I don’t kill this kid before my two weeks are up.
I smile politely and direct my eyes forward when Xander climbs into the car. I’m already uncomfortable thinking about my non-flirting plan, but I have to keep this professional for everyone’s sake.
“So, where do you live?”
“It’s only a couple of miles from here. It won’t take long.”
“Can we go see my Zion later, Daddy?”
Xander looks at her in his rearview mirror. “Maybe, I’ll call and see how she’s feeling. If she’s up for visitors and you’re not too tired after dinner, we will go.”
She sits up taller in her seat. “I’m not tired.”
“Maybe not now, but after dinner, you might be.”
“Nope, nope, nope,” she says stubbornly.
“Zion’s your regular nanny?” I ask even though I know she is.
“Yes. She’s been with us since Tori was a baby.” I want to ask what happened to her mother, but that will have to wait for a time when Victoria isn’t around.
“She must be very special to you both.”
“The most specialist,” Victoria says, and a pang of jealousy hits me in the chest. What the hell? What is wrong with me? I have never considered myself the jealous type, but that was jealousy I felt.
“She’s great, a little lax on appropriate television programming, but she more than makes up for that in other departments,” Xander says. Other departments, huh? I wonder what other departments he means.
We drive in silence the rest of the way to their house. Victoria is humming softly along with the radio, and Xander appears to be lost in his thoughts. I watch the cars, the birds, and the weather to keep my mind off of my life and it’s lack of direction. Before I know it, we are pulling into a long driveway blocked by an enormous wrought iron gate embellished with the letter S.
Xander presses a code into his cell phone, and the gates begin to open slowly. He feels me looking at him, and without turning to me, he says, “We take security very seriously here. You’ll get used to it.”
I assume this has something to do with his ex breaking into his house and upsetting Victoria. What did that woman do to justify this kind of security? I’m not sure I want to know.
I take a quick glance into the back seat and find Victoria clutching her superhero coloring book in her sleep. She’s even more beautiful when she’s asleep if that were possible. She reminds me of one of those little girls on television who gets put into beauty pageants when she’s two years old. She has big wide eyes, perfectly pouty lips, flawless peaches-and-cream skin and long, wavy hair that hangs to her butt.
“She’s out,” I say, and he checks in his mirror.
“She’s had a rough week. A new nanny every day, worrying about Zion, and coming to the clinic with me has her worn out.”
“Poor thing.” He nods in agreement and a muscle twitches in his jaw. He doesn’t like what all of this is doing to his baby. “Maybe a good night’s rest and a day at home doing regular stuff tomorrow will help?”
He smiles a sad, tired smile. “You don’t know how much I hope you’re right.”
A few minutes later, we are pulling into a six-stall garage that is attached to the biggest house I’ve ever been this close to. When I step out of the car, the garage door is still open, and I can smell the ocean nearby. Outside, I can hear it, too.
“We can go in through the garage,” he says lifting a limp Victoria out of her seat. “I’m not sure she’s going to come around for pizza.” He shifts her weight to get a better grip on her, and his briefcase slips from his hand.
“Whoa, careful,” I say grabbing it.
“Thanks, I thought I had it. Could you bring it?”
“Yeah.”
“So, would you rather have something more adult for dinner?”
“You’re serious? You don’t think she’ll wake up and want to eat?”
“Yes, I’m serious. She’s out.”
“I’m not picky, anything is fine.”
“Straight ahead and take a right at the kitchen,” he directs when we are inside. I follow his directions and step into a beautiful open-concept room that overlooks the ocean through a glass wall.
“Wow, this is amazing.” I continue taking it all in—the sprawling living room that flows into a long area with a dining room table for twelve, state-of-the-art kitchen with double islands, and a music area complete with guitars, a grand piano, drums, and a microphone on a stand like it’s ready for a live performance.
“Welcome home, Sasha. Mi casa es su casa.”
“For two weeks anyway, yeah,” I say wandering to the music area. “What’s all this?”
“Oh that, I dabble in music.”
I spread my arms wide. “This is dabbling? Geesh, I’d hate to see what a casual hobby looks like to you. This is like thousands of dollars’ worth of musical instruments.”
“Top of the line, nothing better,” he says, and I’m reminded of the arrogant Xander that turned me off in the emergency room after my accident. I keep my mouth shut and continue to look around.
“So, you play all those instruments?”
“Yes.”
“Do you sing?”
“Yes.”
“Will you sing for me?” I ask and regret the words and the flirtatious way I delivered them immediately.
“Maybe sometime. I’m going to go lay her down and have a look around. Make yourself at home.”
Our eyes lock, and I have the urge to close the distance between us and kiss his mouth. And the crazy thing is I swear he’s reading my mind. I drop my gaze to the floor, and when I look up, they are gone. Releasing a breath I didn’t know I was holding, I walk to the glass wall and look out over the ocean. I’ve always loved the ocean, it’s part of the reason I moved to California. The other part tried to kill me in his car two weeks ago.
“It’s soothing, isn’t it?” Xander says yanking me from my reality and making me jump. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“It’s okay, lost in thought, I guess.” I smile and slip my hands into the pockets in my sundress.
“Not having second thoughts, I hope.”
“Oh, no, not at all. I’m not stupid… this is a great opportunity. I appreciate you helping me…” He steps closer and without warning, his mouth is on mine silencing my nervous chattering.
His tongue slides along my bottom lip asking for entrance. I give it to him willingly without a thought. His hand slides around my neck, and he deepens the kiss making my toes curl inside my sandals.
I step in closer and press my front to his chest threading my fingers through his hair with one hand and resting the other over his pounding heart. He is just as affected by our kiss as I am. I wasn’t imagining the attraction, the chemistry, the road to pain, and ultimately disappointment.
I pull away suddenly and step back. “We shouldn’t,” I whisper. “It’s not professional.”
He reaches out, and I take another step back. “Why does it have to be professional? Why can’t I kiss the beautiful woman who just so happens to be taking care of my daughter?”
I don’t know what to tell him. I mean, I guess I could say because I’m prone to falling in love and becoming very attached. Or I could explain that I have a psycho ex-husband who can’t stand to see me with anyone but him even though he doesn’t want me for himself, thank God. Or how about the fact that I already think I love his daughter after spending an afternoon with her because she reminds me of what I lost when I lost my child a year ago.
No, none of that is appropriate, and a
ll of it would have him calling an Uber so fast it would make my head spin. Then where would I be? Back in my apartment that I can’t afford with no job and no car, that’s where. I need this job. It’s the difference between me living in a homeless shelter and having enough money to comfortably live on for six months.
“I don’t know you, Xander. I mean, you’re my doctor, but I don’t know you like that.”
“Sweetheart, this is how people get to know each other like that,” he says pulling me against him again. God, I know this is wrong, and I should push him away again, but he smells so good, and he’s so strong and masculine and powerful and successful and…
I took too long, his mouth is on mine again. The kiss is softer this time, not as insistent or desperate. Little does he know that’s a much bigger turn on for me than the passionate over-the-top kiss he started with.
I’m gone, lost in his soft touch, dizzy with the feel of his hands roaming over my bare back and down to my ass where the thin material of my dress feels like nothing between us. A moan escapes my lips when he moves the kiss to my neck and down, down between my breasts. His hands cup my ass lifting me off the ground pressing his solid cock against my core. I gasp when I feel the cold of the glass wall against my back and his hands sliding up my thighs. God, it’s been so long since someone has touched me this way, with tenderness and generosity, giving, pleasuring, worshiping.
“Daddy!” Victoria screams from somewhere far away, and Xander and I freeze. He stops kissing my shoulder and lowers me to the floor.
“Nightmares. I’m sorry, I’ll be back in a minute.” He kisses me quickly, and I watch his sexy backside walk toward a winding staircase that leads to the second floor where I assume their bedrooms are located.
Adjusting my dress back into place, I look around for the closest bathroom. A door off the kitchen catches my eye, and I make my way to it smoothing my hair as I go.