“No way, where am I gonna sleep?” Gavin retorted. Isaac threw a couch pillow at him while the others shouted words of protest at him. Apparently, they had all been watching our transaction. “Fine, asshole, sleep in my bed! Don’t enjoy it too much, you pansy.”
Logan ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation, then turned around and walked up the stairs. I watched as he turned towards Gavin’s room when he reached the top, instead of going outside. Relief washed over me, knowing that he was safe.
It took everything in me not to chase after him. I wanted nothing more than to lay beside him and fall asleep next to him, wrapped up in his warm embrace. As I stood staring at the stairs, I realized that he meant so much more to me that I had previously allowed myself to believe. But I had seen this story play out more than once. I watched it happen several times, with each ending being just as devastating as the last, if not more. There was no way in hell I would let it take place again. I knew in my heart that getting too close would be the first step towards the demise of us. If I wanted to keep him, I had to let him go.
My attention turned to Evan. Despite the situation, he appeared incredibly calm. He leaned his pool cue against the wall and walked over to me, placing his hand on the small of my back. “You wanna get outta here, babe?”
“Yeah,” I nodded. “Would you mind taking me home?”
“No problem.”
We said our goodbyes and climbed into Evan’s car. He kept the mood light, and kept the conversation going strong. After a few minutes of talking with him my spirits lifted. I liked Evan. I wasn’t sure I had ever met someone so laid back. His attitude throughout the evening had been remarkable, and I felt I owed it to him to address the awkward ending to our night.
“I’m sorry things got weird before.” I said as we stopped in front of a red light.
“No worries. I had fun,” he replied.
“Really? Even that last part?”
He laughed, “Yeah, I guess that last part was interesting. But I’m cool with it.” He looked at me. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Just checking.”
“Well, I had fun too. Up until that last part.” I smiled at him.
His eyes beamed as he glanced at me. “Fun is good.”
“I like fun.”
His smile widened as the light turned green. His eyes returned to the road as he drove ahead. “Since we both had fun, and it’s good to have fun, maybe we could have fun again sometime.”
I laughed. “Sounds like fun.”
Chapter Twelve
The music was on full blast at the pub the next morning, just the way I liked it. My mind wouldn’t stop thinking about the things that took place last night. I didn’t like what was happening with Logan and me. We definitely weren’t the same, but I didn’t know how to fix it.
I made sure to pick more upbeat songs on the juke box, in an effort to keep my mood light, so when my favorite Katy Perry song came on, I took a break from my pub cleaning duties to jump on top of the bar and pretend I was her. My body moved to the music as I clenched my invisible microphone and belted out the lyrics at the top of my lungs. Then I heard a knock at the door.
It wasn’t unusual for pub patrons to try to come in, thinking the pub opened earlier. I jumped down from the bar and looked over to tell whoever it was that we were closed, but when I looked through the glass doors, I saw Logan with an amused grin on his face. But there was a hint of…something else in his eyes.
He clearly saw me dancing. I looked down at what I was wearing…an old t-shirt, yoga pants, and sneakers. Lovely. I looked back up at him and grinned, then shrugged.
I went to the door, looking at him briefly before opening it. There was a look of concern behind his amused expression. Things had been going downhill with us lately, and I was afraid of what was going to happen.
I opened the door. “What are you doing here?”
“I was thinking about you cleaning those nasty bathrooms, and I came to help,” he replied, still grinning slightly. “Someone like you shouldn’t have to do a job like that.”
“Someone like me?” I asked, becoming defensive. “What’s that supposed to mean? I’m a big girl, Logan. I can handle it.”
“I know. No, that’s not what I meant,” he sighed. “Just let me help you. Please.”
The bathrooms were the worst part of the job, and I hated cleaning them. “And what, exactly, do you get out of helping me?” I asked.
“What, can’t a guy do a good deed? I don’t expect anything in return, Liv. I promise.”
I supposed it wouldn’t hurt. “Well, if you insist.”
I showed him where the supplies were and what to do. I turned around to start my work when he took my arm, forcing me to face him. “Hey, Liv?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry about last night.” His hopeful eyes awaited my response as he held my hand. I couldn’t seem to look away from them. But if I looked at them another moment, I would surely break. So I forced myself to look down at the floor.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Logan. We’re good.” Taking a deep breath for strength, I looked back up at him with the most reassuring smile I could conjure up. I hoped it was believable. He didn’t seem too sure of my comment, so I continued, “Let’s just never do that again, okay?”
“Do what?” he awaited my response, but I didn’t say anything. I wasn’t sure what to say. All I knew was I wanted things to be back to normal. “Liv, tell me, what don’t you want us to do?”
“Not speak to each other for so long. I missed you. It sucked.” I pulled him by the hand and wrapped my arms around his middle, resting my cheek on his chest. If only I could hold on to this feeling of being in his arms.
He sighed and tightened his hold on me. “Yeah, it sucked pretty damn bad. I promise. It won’t happen again.”
Relief washed over me. “Good. Now, I’ve got work to do,” I said, pulling away. “Some of us have jobs, you know.”
He grinned. “Yeah. Suckers.”
I turned around to get started at the bar area.
“Nothing happened,” he said. I turned back to face him, not sure what he was talking about. He continued, “With Chloe. We just kissed.”
“None of my business, Logan,” I said, as I walked away from him with my hands in the air.
“And there was some touching.”
I faced him again to see him grinning like an idiot. “LOGAN!!!”
“What? I didn’t bang her, okay?”
“Oh. My. God.” I turned around with my fingers in my ears and went behind the bar to turn the music up. I cranked it high. When I looked back at Logan from across the pub, he still had a grin on his face. Whenever he tried to say something, I cupped my hand behind my ear and mouthed, “I can’t hear you,” then shrugged. His head tilted back as he laughed, and then he entered the men’s bathroom and went to work.
We spent at least an hour working separately. When he finished, he came out with a disgusted look on his face.
“That’s it, we’re hiring people to do this,” he said. There was something in his voice and in his demeanor that made me feel like we really were good. We really were back to normal.
“Yeah, I’m the hired help, remember? I’m not doing this for my health. I get paid to do it.”
“Well then, I’m going to do it for you. You are not doing that job anymore.”
My eyes rolled as I handed him a glass of water, and he sat down on a bar stool. He watched me as I finished the dishes on the other side of the bar. I felt water dripping on me from somewhere, and I looked up to see a mischievous grin on his face. Then I watched him put his fingers in his water and flick it in my face.
“Hey!” I shouted. Then he did it again, so I took the water dispenser from under the bar and pointed it at him. “Stop it if you know what’s good for you.”
He eyed the water gun, then me. “You wouldn’t.”
He studied me for a moment, as if he were trying to decide whether or not I was bluffing. Then he slowly put his fingers in his water glass and deliberately flicked the liquid in my face again. I pushed the button for only a split second, but that was all I needed to drench his t-shirt with water. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped as he looked down at his soaked shirt, then looked up at me as he shook his head.
“Oh, that’s it. You’re gonna get it,” he warned with a playful smile, and he jumped over the bar to my side.
“Stay back! I’m still armed!” I giggled.
“So am I,” he responded as he took his glass of water and dumped it over my head.
“Hey!” I pushed the button on the water dispenser, this time holding it down for good, making sure he was as drenched as I was. He came after me, causing me to squeal and step back quickly. Suddenly, I lost my footing and stumbled in an effort to stop myself from falling. Logan grabbed me just before I lost it and pulled me toward him with so much force that it caused both of us to fall to the floor.
After the initial shock wore off and I realized I was ok and nothing was broken, I busted into laughter, which in turn caused him to start chuckling. Once we settled down, I became aware of how we landed. We were close. Extremely close. And soaked. I had fallen on top of him with his arms around me. His eyes locked with mine, and the laughter ceased. His touch gave me a feeling of comfort. It felt good, and I realized I didn’t want him to let go.
The feel of his heartbeat on my chest caused my own heart to start pounding hard. Slowly, I lifted my head, trying to somehow pull myself off of him and saw his eyes darken. His breath tickled my face, and the longer we stared at each other, the weaker I felt, even though all my senses became heightened.
“Are you okay?” I whispered.
He gave me a slight nod, keeping his eyes on mine, as I was pushed upward with each breath he took. We were frozen, immersed in each other’s eyes. His hand slowly inched its way from my lower back, and up to the back of my neck, causing my body to pulse. Then he closed his eyes and dropped his head back to the floor. He took a deep breath in and stayed that way for a moment. When he opened his eyes, they seemed to have a glimmer, and a mischievous grin crossed his face. He had regained control.
“We better get you up so you can clean up this mess you made,” he teased. Then he gently pushed me off him and stood up, pulling me with him to a standing position as if I was light as a feather.
I breathed deeply. “I was just defending myself.” My voice had come out more breathy than I anticipated. It must have caught his attention because it caused him to turn his head to look at me with a thoughtful expression, just before it quickly turned into a slight smile.
“Don’t worry, Liv,” he said, as he pulled me into a hug. “I’m not going to let you do it on your own.” Then he kissed my forehead and released me.
Chapter Thirteen
My head pounded as I rose from my bed. After six consecutive sneezes and a number of nose blows, I realized I would be out of commission today. There was no way in hell I was going to sit through school feeling like this. Too lazy to move, I reached for my phone and texted my mom to call the school. I knew she was downstairs getting ready to go to her day job, but I couldn't bring myself to get out of bed.
Knowing how rare it was for me to miss school or work, she texted me back.
No prob. Feel better.
After calling Frank’s to let them know I wouldn’t be at work tonight, I plopped back on my bed and drifted off to sleep.
A familiar tune woke me a few hours later. It was the B.B. King song that Logan sang in his car two months earlier. He had programmed the song and his picture into my phone the night I fell asleep in his apartment. Into his phone, the same night, I had programmed a picture of myself with my fingers in a peace symbol in front of my face with Katy Perry's song "Last Friday Night." I smiled as I took my phone and looked at the overly sexy face he made for my phone picture.
“Hey.” I answered.
“Hey…who is this?” he replied with a confused tone in his voice.
“It’s me. How do you not know who you’re calling?” I attempted to laugh, but it came out as a cough.
“Holy shit, it doesn’t sound like you. Are you okay?”
“I’m sick. I’m home, wallowing in my own misery at the moment.” My voice sounded like a man’s. No wonder he didn’t recognize me.
He paused for a moment, and I wondered if he was really concerned about me. If he was, he made sure not to let on. “Playing hooky, and you didn’t tell me?” he teased.
“Yeah, it’s a big party over here. You’re sure missing out.” I took my glass of water from the mounding pile of tissues and cough drop wrappers and tried to take a drink. While holding the phone on my face with my shoulder, my other hand messed with my iPod, attempting to turn on some music.
“I’m just teasing, Liv. I was going to ask you something, but I’ll wait until you’re feeling better.”
“SHIT! DAMMIT! Logan, I have to go. I just spilled water all over myself.” I hung up, leapt out of bed, and headed towards the bathroom to get a towel. My hand held on to the door frame as a massive head rush ensued, and I reminded myself never to do that again. Never spill water on yourself. Never get up that fast when you are sick.
I figured since I was already soaked, I may as well take a shower. And holy hell, it felt good. I let the hot water massage me and the steam clear my sinuses until the hot water ran out. As I stepped out of the shower, I heard the doorbell. Still relaxed and not wanting to rush, I ignored it. Then there was a knock. Annoyed, since I was in no mood to be in a hurry and the only people who would knock on the door in the middle of a weekday were sales or delivery people, I quickly wrapped a towel around my wet hair and a bathrobe around my body, stepping out of my self-made sauna into the frigid air of the hallway.
Goosebumps prickled my body, and a shiver ran through me as I peeked through a closed window blind to see who was at the door. Logan stood in the icy rain, waiting, holding a white paper bag in one hand and a white plastic bag in the other. A smile formed on my face as my annoyance instantly turned to contentment.
When I opened the door, he looked down at what I was wearing, then up at my head, and I remembered I had a towel on my head. I quickly took it off, instantly realizing how horrible I must look with my tangled wet hair now stuck to my face. Not to mention my sick, puffy, makeup-free eyes.
Logan just stared at me, making me feel even more self-conscious.
He pointed at me up and down. "You shouldn't answer the door like that. I could've been anyone. There's a lot of douchebags out there, you know."
"What do you mean? I'm completely covered!"
He sighed and shook his head. "I know, never mind." His expression changed to compassion, and he walked through the door, passing me, and headed toward the kitchen. After he laid the bags on the table, he began to empty the plastic one. An assortment of boxes and bottles were lined up on the table, all different kinds of cold, cough, and flu medicines. The final thing he pulled out of the bag was a box of Puffs tissues.
"If you're not into drugs, there's a bunch of herbal crap here too," he informed me as he pointed to the non-pharmaceutical vitamins and remedies. "The lady at the vitamin store was incredibly helpful."
I'm sure she was. Logan never had any problems getting women to "help him" with things. I glanced down to see Echinacea, Elderberry, and Thyme supplements next to a box of “Breathe Easy” tea. I silently stared at the assortment, shocked, and not sure if I should laugh or cry. It may have been the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me.
"What's that?" I whispered, pointing to the white paper bag.
He opened the bag and pulled out a Styrofoam container with a plastic lid on it. "This..." He lifted it up and proudly pointed to it. "This is the best chicken noodle soup in the city." Then he began to tell me about a restaurant that his family used to go to befor
e his dad died and how his mom would get take-out chicken noodle soup from there every time he was sick. It was the first time he talked about his mother.
Maybe it was my feeling like crap that made me so emotional, but tears began to creep up behind my eyes as I thought about how incredibly considerate it was for him to do all of this for me. I had become accustomed to taking care of myself. It had been a long time since anyone took care of me.
I quickly pushed the tears back and walked a few steps over to Logan, placing my arms around him, inside his unzipped leather jacket. With my head on his chest, I squeezed him tightly. "Thank you," I croaked, my voice still manly.
He didn't hug me back at first. His hand was still holding the Styrofoam container in the air, but I didn't let go. He was so warm. I wished I could smell his intoxicating scent, but my nose was too plugged up.
Maybe it was the combination of my headache, congestion, and muscle pain that had invited this moment of emotional weakness. Whatever it was, I just needed to be close to him. He slowly placed the chicken soup back on the table and wrapped his arms around me. He rested his cheek on my head and breathed out, letting his body relax. "You're welcome, Liv."
A moment later, he released me. “Now that you have everything you need, I expect a full recovery within twenty-four hours,” he instructed, as he let go of me and began walking towards the door.
“You’re leaving?” I asked.
“Yeah, I was going to…”
“Stay,” I cut him off. “I mean, you can stay if you want to. I was going to watch a chick-flick, but we could watch something else. Or do something else.” He cocked an eyebrow and smirked. I knew what that look meant. “Jesus, Logan! Not that! You’re such a damn flirt. Never mind, go if you must.”
He laughed. “Hey, you said it, not me.”
The Fine Line Page 9