by Dawn Brower
“Sera stay,” Sebastian shouted, jumping up to latch onto Serenity.
Well, where had that come from? Serenity and Sebastian must have bonded far more than Genevieve had realized. He was already putting up a fit at the idea of her leaving. He even created a nickname for her… That wasn’t going to bode well for the duke refusing her assistance.
“I’m not going anywhere,” Serenity said and patted the boy’s head.
Genevieve watched the exchange and an epiphany hit her at the sight. That was the reason Serenity had wanted Sebastian to eat in the breakfast room. She was using their newfound friendship against the duke. How could he deny his son a governess he loved with him around to witness it? She had to admit it was bloody brilliant, and she had a newfound respect for her new sister.
“Fine,” the duke reluctantly agreed. “Serenity can stay. You can start working now. Take Sebastian back up to the nursery.”
“Come with me, munchkin,” Serenity said. Sebastian hopped down and placed his hand in hers. They left the room and didn’t look back.
“When will you leave?” the duke asked with interest.
“I’m not sure,” Genevieve said. “I don’t even know how we go home.”
Trenton smiled. “Lucky for you, we figured it all out. First, we have to go to Weston Manor. From there we will be able to return home. You’ve always had the means to do it.”
If she’d known that months ago, she’d have returned home immediately if there had been a clear path to do so. Weston was the key—that shouldn’t surprise her, but it did. She’d fallen off a cliff at Weston and ended up in the nineteenth century. What did she have to do to return to the future? The idea of willingly jumping off the cliff made her shiver. If that is what it took, she’d gladly stay where she was. Which was probably why she’d never broached the idea of returning to Weston—she had no other clue on how to return, and leaping off a rocky incline wasn’t at the top of her list of things she wanted to do.
“I’ll have a carriage prepared to take you two there. I’ll write a letter of introduction for Weston. I don’t want him to turn you away because you’re strangers to him.”
“That’s unnecessary,” Trenton said. “I’m acquainted with his wife. We were family once.”
Genevieve glared at him. Did he have to bring that up?
“I’ll write it anyway. It never hurts to be prepared for any circumstance.”
With those words, the duke spun on his heels and exited the breakfast room. In a short time, she’d be on her way to Weston, and soon after that she’d be returning home. The saddest part though was none of that scared her as much as sharing a coach with Trenton for the journey. There would be no escaping him, and she’d have to face her feelings. Genevieve wasn’t so sure she was ready to do that. There was so much she had to sort through, and with his charm on hand she’d fall for him before she had time to work it all out inside her head.
Trenton moved to stand behind her. His heat enveloped her and hugged her from the inside out. Her heart beat hard against her chest. He leaned down and whispered in her ear, “Are you ready?” He brought his hand up and trailed his fingers down her arm. “I refuse to give up on us. This time together is a chance to remember the love we both share.” He stepped away from her and left her alone in the room.
Genevieve wasn’t sure if that made her happy or not…
Chapter 7
The carriage hit a bump in the road and sent Genevieve flying into Trenton’s lap. She’d purposely sat on the opposite side of the carriage to avoid touching him. Though she’d desperately wanted to be by his side, she didn’t dare give into the urge. The more time she spent in his company the harder she found it to resist him. With every word and glance he threw her way she was reminded of how much she loved him.
It wasn’t hard to recall why she’d fallen for him in the first place. He looked dapper in his borrowed clothes from the duke, and she’d been unable to stop herself from sneaking glances at him. The clothing fit him surprisingly well, but the sleeves of his jacket were slightly short on his arms. Now it seemed that the fates had something else in mind for her. She wouldn’t be able to avoid him forever, and maybe this was the push she needed to start a much-needed conversation.
“Imagine finding you here,” Trenton joked. “Do you come here often?”
Genevieve wiggled in his lap and laughed nervously. “It used to be one of my favorite spots in the world.”
She was tired of fighting her desires against her insecurities. It was time to explore what she wanted and decide later if it was a mistake or not. Her attraction to Trenton wasn’t something she’d ever been able to resist.
His smile dimmed. “If I could change…”
She shook her head and held a finger to his lips. “Some things can’t be. We have to let go and move on. I’ve been trying to do that for some time now. It wasn’t until you showed up that I realized I’ve been fighting a losing battle.”
In some ways, she’d always known it was ridiculous to resist what she felt for this man. He’d held her heart for so long… They had a lot to work through, and it was still unclear if they had what it took to last. Perhaps she should admit she’d at least like to try, but she still wasn’t ready to voice it.
“You’re right,” he agreed. “Where do we go from here?”
For so long, she’d been going through the motions of life. If she allowed herself to hope… What if, in the end, he’d not come for her? Where would that have left her? That was too much for her to bear. So she’d closed off all her emotions and threw herself into caring for Sebastian. Brandon had been nice to her in his own way. He was a gruff person in general, but he’d never been intentionally mean to her.
Her outburst about their upcoming wedding had been a ruse from the moment it had left her lips. The duke had gone along with it because he’d realized she’d needed that crutch. Before she left, she’d thanked him for everything he’d done for her and made sure he hadn’t actually planned a wedding. He’d been his usual stoic self and said if she ever needed his help he’d be there for her. That was what friends did for each other. A part of her would miss him, but the other part was anxious to return home. A lot could be said for plumbing and hot showers.
None of that mattered if she couldn’t come to terms with her feelings for Trenton. He’d held her heart for so long, and now she wasn’t so sure she should allow him to have it. She’d always love him, and the idea of not having him in her life didn’t sit well with her. They had to talk about what was holding them apart. She supposed it was up to her to begin since she’d been pushing him away since he arrived. With a deep breath, she prepared herself for something that might prove painful.
“That night on the cliff,” she began. “It’s a little fuzzy for me, but I remember you there. I could see you staring down at me as I fell.”
He nodded and swallowed. “I’ve never felt so helpless in my life.”
“Try freefalling to what you believe to be a certain death,” she attempted to joke. “Too soon?” She raised a brow questioningly when he stared at her in silence.
“I won’t ever take the possibility of you dying lightly.” He lifted her hand and kissed her knuckles. “I’m sorry I gave up so soon on finding you. I honestly didn’t have a clue as to where to start. Most people thought I was crazy. It wasn’t until Alys disappeared that I realized that I might be able to find you. The path wasn’t always clear, and wasn’t even remotely easy, but I’m here. If I could have come sooner…” He lifted his hand to her cheek and brushed a tear away she hadn’t realized was there. “Can you ever forgive me?”
How to answer that? Could she? Was there even anything to forgive him for? She’d disappeared—in his place she might have done the same thing. What normal person would believe in time travel or the possibility of chasing the love of their life to a different century? That was what their life had been reduced to. It was one hell of a long-distance love affair. God, she’d missed him, and she was
tired of fighting herself.
“I can’t do that.”
Trenton pulled back and let his head hit the back of the coach. He closed his eyes tight and took a deep breath. His golden-brown hair glistened in the sunlight, streaming through the carriage window. It was a nice summer morning and the heat hadn’t gotten out of hand yet. Genevieve lifted her hand up and caressed his cheek. His eyelids fluttered open and he met her gaze.
“I understand,” he said. “When we get home, I’ll keep my distance.”
He reached underneath her and set her on the seat next to him and then climbed over to the other side. She wasn’t sure what had happened. He must’ve misunderstood. Why didn’t she clarify what she meant? Hurting him had been the last thing on her mind, and somehow she’d still managed to do that. She had to make things right. The yo-yo romance they had going on was too much to bear.
“There is nothing to forgive you for,” she said. “I don’t blame you for moving on with your life. I couldn’t in all honesty expect you to stop living. What if we never saw each other again? Would you have remained single until the day you died?” She raised a brow. “I hope not. I want you to be happy.”
“Not that I’m complaining,” he replied. “But what changed? You were hell-bent on denying me anything, especially happiness, when I first arrived. You even made it clear to me you planned on marrying Branterbery.”
There was no easy answer to his question. She’d never truly wished him ill, but it was gut-wrenching to see him at first. Her reactions were more of a flight or fight type of response. She couldn’t flee and show any kind of weakness, so she’d gone on the attack. He’d bared the brunt of that assault. It was not something she was proud of.
“I’ve never wanted anything to happen to you,” she said. “I apologize if I ever made you believe that. Marrying Brandon…” She paused and considered her words carefully. “He is a good man, and I think he’d have tried to make me happy, but he doesn’t love me or I him. He had asked me, but I’d refused before you arrived. That marriage wasn’t meant to happen, and it was wrong of me to say it would.” She blew out a breath and admitted, “I’m human, and I make mistakes as much as the next person. I’ve had to survive, and I’ve lost so much. It’s hard to recognize who I am anymore. Knowing that, it should be easier for me to let things go and forgive, but that isn’t as simple as it sounds. It’s hard to let go of feelings I’ve been holding on for too long. It might take me a while to fully adjust and let them all go.”
Being held hostage and not having any friends, family, or even strangers to lean on… She’d been thrust into the past without an anchor. Immediately upon arrival she’d been thrown into chaos, and it had taken every ounce of her will to survive. It was hard to let go of feeling alone in the world. Even with Trenton sitting directly across from her, isolation wrapped its cold sheath around her.
He leaned forward on the seat and stared into her eyes. “I know who you are. If you ever need a reminder, ask me and I’ll tell you.” He reached for her hand and pulled it into his. “You’re the woman who’s always owned my heart—the strongest, bravest, and most awe-inspiring person I’ve ever met, and all I can do is hope one day you’ll love me as much as I’ve always loved you.”
He said the sweetest things… “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything.” He smiled. “It’s enough that I found you and you’re coming home with me. The rest will work itself out when it’s supposed to.”
He always could disarm her with a smile. She often wondered if it had the same effect on other people as it did her. When his lips tilted upward her mood immediately brightened. It was like walking outside on a sunny day and absorbing the rays into her soul. Oh, how she’d missed that feeling. Her heart lightened and she found herself smiling back at him like a happy little fool.
“So we wait?”
“Yes,” he said. “I have faith that we will end up exactly where we are supposed to. The fates, God, whoever you want to refer to—has a plan for us. It’s up to us to follow the map they left us.”
“If you’re willing to try, then so am I?” It was the least she could do. They both had a lot to work through. Old hurts were hard to let go even when it was obvious how much the damn things held her back.
“Good,” he said. “There’s a lot you’ve missed. Do you have any questions about what’s happened while you were stuck in the past?”
She did have a lot of questions. Some were from the moments before she disappeared and the others were about her family. She wasn’t sure how much he’d answer, but she wouldn’t find out until she tried. He wanted to make a fresh start. They couldn’t do that unless they had total transparency between them.
“Can you tell me…” She paused, unsure how to word her question.
“Eve, just ask,” he said earnestly.
“Why were you so distant before I disappeared? It felt like we were drifting apart then. If I can’t trust what we had, then how can I believe we have any kind of future?”
She loved him. That had never been in question. The faith she had in his love for her had been. If he didn’t answer in an acceptable fashion they didn’t have a chance in hell of reuniting.
“It’s kind of a long story.” He sighed. “But I’ll tell you everything. I couldn’t back then because it was of a sensitive nature.”
She frowned. “I don’t understand.”
“I know,” he said. “But you will. It all started when my father came to see me at work one day.”
“At his business?” She was confused. Trenton worked with his father. Why would he have to go visit him at work? Perhaps he meant to say in his office.
“No, love. I hate that company and never intended to work for them. I’m an agent, or rather was one, for the National Fraud Intelligence Bureau. I took a sabbatical from the NFIB to help my father catch the person embezzling from his firm. It took longer than I planned, but we did eventually uncover him and had him taken into custody. I never returned to the NFIB after you disappeared. I couldn’t focus on anything and have been drifting for a while.”
That was not what she expected him to say. “Why couldn’t you tell me all of that before? I would have understood.”
It would have saved them both a lot of heartbreak too. At the time, she’d thought he no longer loved her and was putting distance between them to avoid an argument or something. Oh, how she’d misjudged him… She’d been about to end their relationship that night. Something she’d not really wanted to do, but she’d been so sick of him cancelling their plans and pushing her away. It all was so clear now and there had been so much time wasted, both literally and figuratively. They’d missed out on so much. If he’d been forthright sooner she might never have gone to the cliffs that night, and maybe, just maybe, she would never have fallen through time in the first place. It is hard to say what direction their life might have taken.
“I couldn’t,” he said. “I was a secret agent with the NFIB. I couldn’t blow my cover with them—even for you. If we’d married, I could have shared it with you, but not before then. As to my father’s mess… He asked me to keep it private. I’d have trusted you with everything, but it wasn’t my secret to share.”
She could understand that. If his father didn’t want the world to know about his embezzler, that was his business. The secret agent stuff though… “So you would have married me without telling me that you were in a clandestine organization and your work could potentially get you killed? Don’t you think that is something I should’ve known?” She had a new appreciation for Rosanna’s predicament and how she handled the discovery that the man she loved was a spy. Dom had pushed Rosanna away to protect her from his occupation too. Genevieve hadn’t realized how much she’d actually had in common with her.
He nodded. “I would have told you before we married. If we had any chance at all—we needed total honesty between us. I didn’t want you to make that big of a decision without having all the facts.”
He paused and stared into her eyes. “I had planned on asking you to marry me before you disappeared. I had a ring that I carried with me everywhere, waiting to find the best opportunity to ask you.”
Her mouth fell open as that revelation hit her. It sucked all oxygen from her lungs and she had trouble breathing. He’d planned on asking her to marry him… If there had ever been a time for her to be able to read his mind, that was it. Why didn’t her telepathy ever work with him? Was it because he was her one true love? Maybe she wasn’t supposed to know everything about him. Some people were meant to keep their secrets, and it appeared as if Trenton was one of them.
“Do you still have it?” Had he had it with him the night she’d fallen over the cliff? Her heart beat heavily in her chest. She wanted to see it to feel it on her finger…
“The ring?” he asked. “I do. One day I might pull it out and ask you as I’d always intended. If I’m lucky enough, you might even say yes.”
Genevieve was starting to think she was the lucky one…
Chapter 8
The carriage pulled up on front of Weston Manor. In some ways, it appeared as if he’d never traveled back in time. The structure itself appeared the same. There were minute differences. The shrubbery hadn’t completely grown in, and the ivy hadn’t yet covered the left side of the manor. There were bound to be variations and they would become more evident once he was inside. He couldn’t wait to see what the nineteenth century version of his step-brother’s estate would look like.
Genevieve had fallen asleep in the last hour of their journey. She’d joined him on his side of the carriage, and her head currently rested against his shoulder. The journey had been cathartic. It had given them a chance to rehash some of their old wounds and clear the way for a new beginning. He hoped she was finally ready to see where their future might lead. The past twenty-four hours had been hell. It was hard to believe it had been that long since he’d gone through the mirror with Serenity. It was almost as if a lifetime had passed in that short amount of time. What a difference a day could make…