by Gina Wilkins
“Did you tell her you were going with me?”
Renae cleared her throat. “I told her we were both attending.”
“But not together.”
Lucy had been disapproving enough that Renae would be at the same function as Evan. “He just keeps turning up,” she had muttered. “Like a bad penny.”
“I just want to help raise donations for the scholarship,” Renae had replied, unable to quite meet her mother-in-law’s eyes. “Tate and his wife and sister will be there, too. And a lot of other people.”
All of which had been true, of course. So why did she feel vaguely guilty?
“I don’t really want to talk about Lucy now,” she said, toying with her evening bag.
“Fine. Neither do I.”
“Fine.” Renae gazed out the side window at the passing holiday lights, trying to put her self-recriminations out of her mind and get into the mood for a party.
The event was held in the ballroom of a local country club. It was immediately apparent that the Graingers were a prominent local family. Though Renae didn’t usually travel in these circles, she recognized a few of the faces entering the extravagantly decorated room from local political and society news coverage.
“Wow,” Evan murmured in Renae’s ear. “When Emma said her family was throwing a ‘little holiday party,’ this wasn’t exactly what I pictured.”
A little less confident in her choice of clothing now, she glanced around warily, but finally decided she’d chosen well enough. The fashion choices ranged from dressy denim with sequins to holiday gowns, which put her somewhere in between. Maybe her outfit had come from a clearance rack after last year’s holiday season, but at least it was from a quality line, she assured herself, needing the little private pep talk.
Emma must have been watching for them. With Tate and two other women trailing behind her, she threaded her way through the milling crowd to approach them with a warm smile. She looked stunning in a deep red side-gathered dress with a low neckline. Renae couldn’t help wondering how Evan could have spent so much time around Emma without wanting to be more than just friends, but she supposed there was no explaining sexual chemistry.
Emma raised her voice a little to be heard clearly over the clamor of voices and laughter and the secular holiday music in the background. “Renae, it’s so good to see you again.”
Few people watching would probably guess that Emma had met Renae only fleetingly on one previous occasion, Renae thought, returning the smile. “It’s nice to see you, too, Emma.”
Evan brushed a rather brotherly kiss against Emma’s cheek. “You clean up pretty good, kid,” he teased her.
She patted his arm. “As do you. Renae, you know Tate, of course. This is his wife, Kim, and his sister, Lynette. And this is Lynette’s friend Ken Kelly,” she added, motioning toward a tall, slender man standing a bit back from the rest of the group. “Everyone, say hello to Renae Sanchez.”
The other two women nodded greetings. Kim had wavy, shoulder-length chestnut hair and brown eyes, just a hint of freckles across a cute nose, and a smile that was disarmingly gamine. Lynette had the same hazel-green eyes as her brother, set in a friendly, girl-next-door face. Her hair was loosely curled, the dark red color probably salon-enhanced.
“It’s nice to finally meet you, Renae,” Lynette said, studying her with open curiosity. “I’ve heard about you for years, of course, but our paths just never crossed.”
“Come see our auction tables,” Emma urged, motioning toward them all. “My mom and I set them up earlier and we’re quite proud of them.”
The red-and-green-draped tables lined a back wall of the room. The items available in the silent auction were beautifully displayed with pads and pens arranged so that guests could leave their bids. A list of the four charities that would benefit from the auction was displayed on a cheery poster on the wall. The Jason Sanchez Memorial Scholarship was second on the list. Her gaze lingering on the name for a moment, Renae felt a small lump in her throat as she thought of how touched Jason would be.
The variety of auction items was impressive, from the designer sunglasses donated by Renae’s bosses to weekends at Arkansas fishing resorts, gift certificates for meals, services and merchandise, autographed sports memorabilia, and other attractive prizes. The Graingers were obviously well connected to have procured all these nice donations. It gratified Renae to see Lucy’s snowy-white lap blanket displayed with special care, temptingly draped as though to illustrate how comfy it would be. Already several bids were written on the pad.
“I’m hoping to win that myself,” Emma confided in a low voice to Renae. “I’m going to wait until the last minute, then ‘snipe’ my own bid onto the sheet. It will be fair—Dad will let everyone know when the bidding’s about to come to an end. But I’m determined to get that lovely lap blanket.”
Renae laughed. “We have quite a few of them at home. If this one gets away from you, I’ll see what I can do to get you one.”
“No, it’s the principle of the thing now. I want this one.”
“She’s very competitive,” Lynette said with a grin that slowly faded. “I’m going to miss her so much.”
“Now, Lynette, don’t start,” Emma warned quickly, looking around to see if anyone else at the party had overheard. “Especially where my mom might hear you. She’s having a hard enough time dealing with this—I don’t want her to make a scene at the party.”
Seeing that Renae looked confused, Evan explained in a low voice. “Emma’s taking a leave of absence from her job at the rehab center to take a temporary job on the West Coast after the first of the year. Her friends and family are having trouble accepting her decision.”
Emma sighed and shook her head. “I’m not moving away forever. I just want to experience something different for once in my life. On my own.”
Lynette didn’t look notably cheered. “Everything’s changing,” she grumbled. “It’s hard for me to process change.”
Tate laughed and patted his sister’s back. “Deal with it, sis. Nothing stays the same forever, no matter how much you wish it would.”
Unexpectedly struck by his words, Renae swallowed hard. She’d been struggling with her own fear of change since Evan had come back into her life. She understood all too well that changes could be both thrilling and unnerving—exactly the way she felt right now. It was a relief when Emma nudged them all into the crowd to start mingling.
Chapter Nine
The evening was more pleasant than Renae had expected. Though she met quite a few people during the course of the party, her time was spent primarily with Evan’s group of close friends. She liked Emma, Kim and Lynette very much, talking with them very easily considering they had just met. She and Kim talked about their children, sharing funny stories of that first year of child rearing while Tate and Evan did some networking with a couple of local business bigwigs. Lynette’s companion, Ken, stood by one of the food tables, chatting with another acquaintance, giving the four women a chance to visit over glasses of champagne.
“I can’t imagine having two infants to take care of,” Kim said with an impressed shake of her head. “It’s been challenging enough with just one, especially with a full-time job, too. I went back to work when Daryn was six weeks old, putting her in an excellent day care program a friend had recommended. Tate and I married in October, and he’s been great to help with her, but I was on my own for her first ten months. I don’t know how I’d have gotten by with twins.”
Renae had heard a little of the story of Tate’s whirlwind courtship with the pretty single mom, but she was still curious about some of the details. She didn’t ask, of course, merely responding to Kim’s comments.
“I was lucky enough to have my mother-in-law to help me with the babies, or I don’t know how I’d have coped. I was six months pregnant with them when I lost my husband, so I didn’t have long to prepare for them afterward. I went back to work when they were three months old, and Lucy was amazing with
them.”
“That must have been a very hard time for you,” Lynette said sympathetically. “I met your husband a few times and he always seemed so nice. That’s why I wanted to help with the scholarship.”
Emma nodded. “Lynette secured several of our auction items for tonight. She can be very persuasive,” she added with a wry smile.
“Anyway, I’m so glad you came tonight,” Lynette continued to Renae. “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you. Our little gang gets together occasionally for dinner or game night. Maybe you’ll come with Evan next time?”
It didn’t escape Renae’s notice that Lynette had basically invited her to come as Evan’s companion rather than on her own. She suspected the implication had been unintentional, but it was a sign that Evan’s friends were beginning to view them as a couple. Had he said anything to them about seeing her, or were they intuitive enough about their friend to have put the clues together? Knowing Evan, she suspected the latter was true.
“That sounds like fun,” she said when she realized the others were waiting for some sort of response from her. “Maybe I will sometime.”
“Oh, and feel free to bring the kids. Kim and Tate usually have Daryn with them, and she loves seeing other children,” Lynette added.
This time Renae merely smiled. She wasn’t sure how to explain that she’d been deliberately keeping Evan and her family apart. Emma gave her a look, but didn’t say anything. Emma, of course, had seen that the kids didn’t know Evan when they’d run into each other at the River Market.
“We also get together every Wednesday for lunch,” Lynette rattled on.
“Yes, Evan told me about your lunches.”
“You should join us sometime—especially before Emma leaves,” Lynette added with a distinct pout.
“Lynette—”
“I know. Don’t start.” Lynette subsided with a sigh.
Having now met Emma’s mother, a tiny, still-striking woman of Korean descent, Renae could understand why Emma didn’t want discussion of her impending travel at the party. Just a passing mention of the upcoming assignment had Amy Grainger’s eyes welling with tears she had bravely fought back, even though Emma had impatiently reminded her mother and everyone else within hearing that she wasn’t moving to the other side of the world, and she had every intention of coming back home when the job was completed.
“I take it you’ve never lived away from your parents,” Renae couldn’t resist saying to Emma.
Tucking a strand of glossy dark hair behind her ear, Emma made a face. “I have my own apartment in Little Rock, but the farthest I’ve ever lived from them was when I went to college in Conway, a half hour drive from their house. They have their reasons for being so overprotective, but I just think it would be good for all of us for me to be completely independent. Besides, I’d like to see what else is out there, you know? I mean, I’ve traveled with my family and I went to Europe in college—but I’ve never truly lived on my own in a new place. I just want to see if I can do it.”
“Aren’t you nervous about it?” Lynette asked curiously, still resistant but looking more intrigued by Emma’s explanation.
Emma laughed shortly. “I’m scared half to death. But I figure if I don’t take a few risks I’ll never know what I might have missed, you know?”
Renae felt her left eye twitch in what might have been a slight wince.
Evan and Tate rejoined them then, pleased that they’d just made a valuable business connection. From the front of the ballroom, Emma’s dad announced that only five minutes remained before the close of the auction. Emma joined the ensuing, laughing rush toward the tables to make sure she was the final bidder on the afghan.
“Did you bid on anything?” Evan asked Renae with a smile.
“Of course. I left a bid on the dog training classes. Boomer could really benefit from that.”
“Boomer, huh?” he asked with a chuckle. “This would be the dog who caused you to fall off the stepladder?”
She smiled up at him. “That would be the one.”
He grinned. “Then yes, I would say lessons are definitely in order.”
Their gazes locked for a moment, but then she looked away. Only to find herself meeting Lynette’s indulgently approving smile. Lynette must have read more into that brief exchange than had actually been there, Renae assured herself.
She had told herself she wouldn’t go up to Evan’s apartment after the party, but would instead get straight into her car and head home. It wasn’t very late when they drove into his parking lot, and she had no doubt she would be tempted to stay quite a while if she went upstairs.
Maybe he sensed her quandary. After turning off the engine, he gave her a moment before asking in a quiet voice, “Have you decided yet?”
She unfastened her seat belt. “Decided what?”
“Whether you’re coming up. Surely you know I’m voting yes.”
She yearned. That was the only word to describe the way she felt when she thought of entering Evan’s apartment, moving into his arms. Though it had been only a week and a half since they’d made love, suddenly it felt so long. She’d suppressed the sensual side of her nature for a very long time, but now that Evan had reawakened it, it was hard to ignore.
Every time they were together, he became more important to her. Which admittedly terrified her.
If I don’t take a few risks I’ll never know what I might have missed, Emma had said.
Renae knew exactly what she would be missing. And she understood clearly the risks she faced.
With a sigh, she opened her purse and dug into it.
She sensed Evan’s disapproval. “Looking for your keys?”
Taking out her phone, she peered down at the screen as she typed a quick message. “Just telling Lucy not to wait up for me.”
He went still for a moment, then nodded in satisfaction. “Good.”
* * *
Tiny white lights glimmering above her head and a low fire in the gas log fireplace were the only illumination in the deeply shadowed living room. Lying on a soft blanket spread on the floor, a snuggly fleece throw draped over her, Renae gazed up at the tree, mesmerized by the reflections on the shiny ornaments. Evan lay beside her, one arm beneath her, the other crooked behind his head.
Drawing her attention from the tree lights, she focused on Evan. He looked relaxed, contented. So very appealing. She reached out to trail a finger along his strong jaw.
He smiled at her. “What?”
She traced the curve of his lips. “Nothing.”
He kissed her fingertip. “Okay.”
“I have to leave soon.”
His smile turned instantly to a frown. “Already?”
“It’s getting late, Evan.”
His sigh was both reluctant and resigned. “I know.”
She sat up, holding the throw to her breasts and glancing toward the neat pile of clothing on the nearest chair.
Evan pushed himself upright beside her and ran a hand down her bare back. “It seems like you’re always running off just as we’re getting comfortable.”
“A little too comfortable,” she countered lightly, though his touch made her shiver. “Much longer and I’d have fallen asleep.”
“I’d have been okay with that.”
She turned her head to look at him. His knees drawn up in front of him, he rested his arms atop them, unself-consciously nude. Not that he had any reason to be self-conscious—he looked like a statue of masculine perfection sitting there. She was conscious of her own imperfections—softness that could be a bit more toned, a few faded stretch marks from her pregnancy—but Evan never seemed to mind, or even notice, those flaws. Even now, he studied her with open admiration.
“You know I can’t sleep here,” she reminded him.
He nodded. “I know. But I still can’t help thinking about how nice it would be to wake up with you.”
It would be nice, she thought wistfully. But it wasn’t going to happen. “I’m sure you
’re not used to seeing women who have to rush home to their kids after a rare free evening with you.”
She wasn’t sure why she’d spoken that thought aloud. Was she reminding Evan or herself of the reality that lay outside this firelit fantasy?
“This is a first for me,” he admitted. “In a lot of ways.”
She wasn’t sure quite how to take that.
He leaned forward to kiss her shoulder. “I want more, Renae.”
She swallowed hard in response to both the kiss and the husky murmur. “More what?”
“More than an occasional stolen hour. I want to see the other part of your life, too.”
“There’s nothing exciting about my life.” Other than those stolen hours he’d mentioned, of course. “I go to work... I go home. I have dinner with my family, make lunches for myself and the kids. When I’m not at a school or church function with the family, I spend the evenings watching TV or playing board games with the kids and after they’re in bed, I read or play gin rummy with Lucy. On weekends we shop or see G-rated movies or visit the zoo or a playground.”
She spread her hand that wasn’t holding the fleece throw. “With the exception of the occasional social or business function like tonight, Wednesday evening is the only time I’m completely on my own. And for the past couple of months, you’ve had those, so I’d say you know pretty much everything about me.”
He had to have noticed how prominently Lucy figured into her life away from him. Had to understand the obstacles between them.
Still, he wasn’t notably dissuaded. “It sounds like a good life.”
“It has been,” she admitted. Especially for the past couple of months, she added silently. Despite the doubts and anxiety he had caused her, these stolen hours with Evan had filled a gaping hole in her otherwise contented existence. The thought of how much she would miss these encounters when—not if—they ended filled her with dismay.
His hand slid down her back again. “I understand why you’re reluctant to risk change. And I don’t want to mess up a good thing. I’d just like to be a part of it. I know it’s going to take a while for Lucy to come around, but maybe you and I could do something with the kids next weekend? Maybe we could take them to one of those pizza arcade places. Kids like those, don’t they?”