by Len Webster
No.
The absurd feeling of wanting to know Clara was nothing but a reaction to the fact that she stood before him, stunning. Noel couldn't want to stare into her eyes forever. He already had his perception of Clara set; he didn't need those golden-brown eyes trying to change that.
But Noel knew that no matter how much he still disliked her, he couldn't forget the fact that she was the first woman to ever make him struggle to breathe with just her presence alone. However, he couldn't forget the look of her brown eyes that flickered with specks of amber. He knew that he couldn't deny himself the pleasure of her beauty because Noel knew only one thing… he was in trouble.
It isn’t real. He can’t be standing in front of me right now! It can’t be real!
Clara’s heart sank and her brain started to malfunction. She was in shock. The one person standing in front of her was the last person she ever expected. It was her past. Specifically, her childhood looked back at her. Nothing in the world could have prepared her for him to be standing there. When she heard that knock, she believed it would be Liam.
When she opened the door she could register his name in her thoughts, but words failed her when it came to speaking. Her hands had started to sweat as the memories of her childhood flooded through her thoughts. The universe was throwing her another curve ball. The one person she was so sure hated her more than anything stood centimetres from her. Growing up she was sure that his “hate” for her was his way of treating her like a sister, but she suspected he never truly liked her. Only having to tolerate her for Alex’s sake.
Nolan Parker.
Clara looked at her white-painted door. Her breathing faltered as she tried to process it all. But no matter how much she tried, the fear in her grew. Her brother’s best friend was here. It was a concept she couldn’t understand.
Turning, she leant her back against the door, hands covering her face. She would rather go back to the night she found out about Darren cheating than face Noel. She couldn’t ignore the fact that he surprisingly appeared on her doorstep with luggage in hand.
Of all the people in this world!
He didn't even remember who she was. Noel would have rather frolicked with hungry sharks than babysit her.
Babysit?
His sudden appearance baffled Clara. He was here the day before Alex, with luggage in hand, and he was on the other side of her door. He said he needed to babysit her. Factors kept running through her mind. Clara put more pressure on her back and started to slide down the door until she felt the floor beneath her. With her back firmly placed on the hard door, her hands still covered her face.
Why would she need babysitting? She would be nineteen on Friday, and that was six days away. She didn't need an arrogant asshole like Nolan Parker to look after her. She was more than capable of looking after herself; she had done so for over a year.
As Clara withdrew her hands from her face, it started to make sense, all of it. She got up from the floor and patted her dress to remove any creases before taking in a few short breaths. She adjusted her hair, and as calmly as her body would let her, she placed a hand on the handle and opened the door.
Noel stood where she left him after she had slammed the door in his face. It was the first time she could actually take him in. She wasn’t surprised by what stood in front of her. Even at eighteen he was unbelievably good looking; fast forward five years, and he had the power to make her melt.
Noel’s physical appearance could make her breathless. His shoulders were broader, his muscles more defined, his face chiselled, his brown hair was cut short, and those green eyes… mesmerising.
His good looks let down by his arrogance. Clara couldn’t help her wondering eyes as she observed him.
I wonder what he would look like with his shirt off.
She mentally cursed his attractiveness. Why was she thinking about him in such a sexual way? She couldn’t think about her brother’s best friend in that way. He was Nolan Parker, the boy who never thought of her.
Pull yourself together! Focus, Clara!
"Is Alex… okay?" she asked softly as she stared at the floorboards. Sneaking glances at him, she noticed he wore skinny jeans and a pair of Converse. She imagined him in suits rather than his casual attire. Clara stood there, hand on her front door and eyes focused on the natural patterns of the wooden floorboards. Noel cleared his throat and she lifted her head so her eyes met his.
"Uhh, listen, Clara, that's why I'm here. You may want to sit down," he instructed as he pointed to the couch behind her. His tone alone made Clara nervous as she chewed her bottom lip.
Her heart started to race and her breathing came out in gasps. She felt like she was having a panic attack.
Alex is hurt. He can’t be hurt, can he?
Countless theories on Alex's safety and livelihood ran through her thoughts. He had to be okay; she had spoken to him not too long ago. Noel continued to stare at her. His gaze made her uncomfortable and he gave nothing away.
She spun on the balls of her feet and made her way to the couch. She steadied a hand on the arm of the sofa and sat down. Noel shut the door, calmly placed his luggage next to it, and made his way to the old French armchair. She waited impatiently as he settled in before she would question him.
"Well?" she asked. The worry was clear in her voice.
"Listen, kiddo, your brother..." Noel paused, causing Clara's fear to increase. Her head felt light and her stomach formed tight knots.
"Noel, please tell me. You have me worried as hell," she begged as she twiddled her fingers. The sweat on her hands made it easy for them to glide past each other.
He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. Noel looked pained as if it was slow torture for him. He kept her waiting for far too long. She was impatient and determined. Clara would go over there, grab a fist full of his shirt, and demand answers.
"Alex is in trouble."
I knew it!
"How bad is it? He isn't ill or anything?" Clara asked as she leapt from her seat and stood in front of him.
“Depends." Noel shrugged. He was making it so hard for her not to lose control.
"What the hell does ‘depends’ mean, Noel?" she shouted in fury.
He inhaled another breath of air. He’d need another one soon because she was going to punch him in the gut if he didn’t start talking, but that would only slow him down.
"An account he’s been working on has the IRS digging through his files. He isn't able to come for your birthday because he has to sort out the accounts and have them ready for—"
"Jesus, Noel!” she yelled out, her arms in the air. His eyes lit up and his eyebrows bunched together in confusion.
"What?"
"What do you mean, ‘what?’" she began, the irritation evident in her voice.
"Here you are, coming into my apartment, telling me to sit down because you have news about Alex and—"
"And?" he interrupted, raising a brow.
She would punch him in his pretty face if she didn't already know that it would hurt her more than him. "God, Noel! You made it out as if Alex died," Clara explained, ensuring the word “died” came out without confusion.
"Died? You thought Alex… died?" He laughed. Clara tensed at his laughter. She didn't see the humour in it, so why did he?
"Clara, if you think Alex really died, would I really be the one comforting you? Wouldn't it be… I don't know, either one of your parents telling you? Not me," he said, too proud of himself.
"Oh," was all that came from her mouth. "Well, thank you for coming to tell me. I guess I'll see you around when Ale—" she began to say.
Noel rose from his seat and stood in front of her. Those green eyes of his darkened and she swallowed hard. "I'm not going anywhere, Clara."
What?
"I… uh, don't understand," she said, confused. Noel wasn't looking at her eyes and that made her tremble. She blushed under his inspection. He turned and looked towards to door.
"You see th
at?" he said, pointing to his bag.
"Uh, yeah?" Clara replied, more confused than before.
"I didn't lug that thing around for twenty minutes in the heat for nothing, Clara. I am here to stay."
To stay… Oh God, no!
"What?" she blurted. It was like she had been hit on the head with a bag of sand; dazed and confused, she knew this wasn't good.
"Your brother, who is my best friend, thinks I need to be here with you," he said as he took a step closer to her, and his warm breath hit her cheek.
"Uhh, why?" She trembled. Noel was making her more nervous than Liam had. He would be living with her. Clara let those words sink in, but they were hazy; they weren't cementing themselves in her brain.
"Because, kiddo, your brother thinks with what's happened to you as of lately, the news of his not being here would cause you to fall into a pit of depression and then well… kill yourself, pretty much." Noel shrugged as if what he said didn't mean anything. If she weren’t in such a haze she would have kicked him right in his manhood.
Arrogant asshole!
"Alex thought I'd commit… suicide?" She needed to hear the words for herself.
"Not exactly. He didn't say those exact words. More like he hinted them, somewhere deep, deep inside." Noel’s lips curled up into a smug smile. She came to the conclusion that she hated that look.
"So. You. Are. Staying." A statement Clara was not comfortable saying for ears to hear.
"Yeah.” He paused.
Okay, he just said “yeah” like it’ll be fine between the two of us. Maybe this won’t be so—
"Unfortunately," Noel exasperated.
Such an asshole!
"Well roomie, show me where I’m sleeping," Noel said searching the apartment for the bedrooms.
"Well, if you would so kindly look to your left, there’s the door. Use it. Goodbye, Noel," she said as she moved past him.
“Don't be so stupid, Clara. You can't get rid of me that easily. I'm here. There is no way I'm letting Alex down. Whether you like it or not." Steel laced his voice, hardening his words.
Clara was dumbfounded. She was shocked at Noel’s loyalty to her brother.
Alex should be worried now! I’ll really kill myself now that Noel is here.
"What's that burning? It's smoking up the joint," Noel said, breaking her train of thought. Clara shook her head and focused on the smoke that filled her apartment. He sniffed the air and waved his arms about to rid the smoke.
Shit, the pasta!
The hot sun filtering through the window and soft footsteps woke Noel. He groaned when he saw that he woke up just after seven a.m. He placed a hand over his face, not allowing the morning light to hit his sleepy eyes. Untangling the blanket from him, Noel sat up and scratched his head. Deciding against going back to sleep, he got out of bed.
Letting out a yawn, he walked to the door of the guest room, opened it and looked out into the lounge. She wasn’t there, but he heard her. He walked over to the kitchen and opened the stainless steel fridge, the cool air hitting his skin, causing him to shiver. His throat was dry and he needed to quench the thirst that started to drive his body crazy.
He grabbed a carton of orange juice and contemplated drinking from it, but it wasn’t his. Looking around the kitchen, he wasn’t sure where a glass was. Clara’s kitchen was big and had a classic French country theme to it. It was cozy.
Damn, it’s all Clara. Why does she have to be so annoyingly adorable one minute and then unexpectedly hot the next?
The thought made him frown. Excitement and adrenaline coursed through his body when he remembered last night, when he stood close to her and watched her cheeks blush. He wasn’t sure if her blush was because she felt an attraction toward him, or because his close proximity was too personal and uncomfortable for her. Noel looked up and started to search through the first top cupboard above the sink, only to come across shelves of plates and bowls.
He was getting frustrated, and contemplated buying Clara a brand-new set, because he found the search to be ridiculous. Noel took a second look at the carton and had to forcibly refrain himself from grabbing the juice and chugging it down.
He came to the next cupboard and thought about pouring the juice in a bowl and drinking it straight. Noel would feel like a thirsty dog on a hot day, but he was just that. He placed a hand on the cupboard knob and opened it. He caught sight of what he finally wanted.
You sneaky bastards!
A victorious smile developed as he reached up to grab the glass. The slight shift of footsteps sounded behind him. Clara was behind him. He would explain that he’d replace the juice if she wanted.
“Ah, Noel, maybe you want to put on some pants?” Clara asked with a hint of humour to her voice.
Noel glanced down, realising he’d messed up. He quickly placed the glass down, instincts taking over as he moved his hands below his waist.
Fuck, I’m naked!
He usually slept without clothes on back home. In his sleepy state and without the cool Boston air hitting his skin this morning, he’d completely forgotten the need to slip on underwear.
There was an awkward moment of silence. Clara didn’t say more and Noel had no idea what to say to explain his nudity.
How do I brush this off? I don’t need Clara making this awkward between us.
If it had been any other woman, he’d turn around and seduce her until they were in bed. But it was Clara Lawrence, and she wasn’t any other woman. His plans to keep her at a distance were proving difficult. He wanted her. She was getting under his skin and the pull he felt around her was consuming.
He couldn’t seduce her. No matter how much he wanted to, he couldn’t. Noel wasn’t allowed to lay a finger on her, let alone allow her to rebound with him. He had to control himself. His inner demons were not going to be set free. He wasn’t, and shouldn’t be, thinking about Clara like that. The only way he could keep her at a distance was to act like he didn’t care. To make sure he never crossed that line. And the only way he could move on from this was if he used his charm. Make light of the situation.
“Like what you see, Clara?” He turned to see her reaction. Noel lowered himself down so he was leaning on the counter and his lower region was out of sight.
“Please,” Clara replied as she made her way to the bar and placed her bowl on it. She was either a really good liar, or she had no attraction to him. Noel couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed by the latter; though, he wouldn’t let that show.
“Why are you naked in my kitchen?” she asked, raising a brow. Noel liked the way she had asked him that.
I need a lie, and a good one to explain this.
“Pit stop before a shower. You’re welcome to join.” He winked. He watched as surprise crept on her pretty face.
“I’ve had better offers than that,” she replied in a softened voice that made her sound very sexy.
Ahh, damn.
Clara turned and walked toward the hallway. Moments later, she returned to face him, and handed him a towel. Noel took it, a little stunned at her reply. She sat down at the kitchen table to Noel’s right and started to read a book that was already placed there.
Wrapping the towel around his waist, he let out a heavy sigh. He turned around to pour himself the juice he had been wanting and chugged it down. Without another word to Clara, he made his way to the bathroom to scrub off the humiliation she’d delivered.
“Noel,” she called out again. That sexy voice of hers was definitely affecting him.
“Yeah.” Noel turned back around and walked to Clara. He stopped when he saw that she was looking up at him. There was a moment of sexual tension, and Noel knew it.
“Remind me…”
This is it! I won’t have to seduce Clara. She wants this. Screw Alex. This isn’t about him.
“To burn those sheets of yours after you leave,” she replied, and she returned to her book. He could have choked on air if he had any in his lungs. He didn’t care that she
just insulted him; that look in her eyes made his blood run hot through his veins. He wasn’t sure if it was actually lust, or something else, but he was determined to find out.
It is going to be so hard to stay away from you, Clara.
He gave Clara a shrug and made his way to the bathroom. He needed to blast his body with cold water to remove any bad thoughts he had of her, and there were many. She was making it difficult for him. Noel had to be good, but she was, intentional or not, setting his demons alight.
Once he dried his hair and his body, he wrapped the towel around his waist and made his way back the bedroom. On his way, he caught sight of Clara standing in the kitchen, staring at the counter as she chewed her bottom lip.
She was deep in thought and the way her nose crinkled a little made him want to go over there and hold her face in his hands. He wanted those cheeks to turn red again, but he refrained. Instead, Noel walked over and stood next to her, looking in the direction she was also staring.
“What are you thinking about? Me… naked?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
Clara was still in thought, and didn’t flinch when he reminded her about his being naked.
“No.” She turned to face him; her brown eyes flickered as those gold tones became visible. “I was thinking…”
Noel waited for her to continue, still staring into those warming eyes of hers. He liked the colour more than he should.
“I might need to disinfect my kitchen,” she finished. Noel let out a struggled groan. All she did was speak, and she had completely turned him on. Like what she said made something in his brain snap. He was in serious trouble now.
She has no idea the effect she has on me.
Noel didn’t reply. He stood there staring at her like what she had said excited him. For a moment, she wanted it to be true, but the look on his face had her hoping not. She couldn’t see him in any way more than her brother’s best friend. Those lines were drawn, and she wasn’t going to cross them.
Who am I kidding? Noel has the body of a god! This is not okay!