by Len Webster
“Tough night?” he asked. Clara looked up at him. He had a cute dimple when he smiled, but his dark eyes almost resembled Darren’s, and that made her sick.
“You could say that,” she answered shortly.
“Boyfriend on your case?” he asked as he fiddled with a cocktail napkin.
“I don’t have one,” she corrected him. Clara looked up at him to see a mischievous grin. That grin should have sent alarm bells ringing, but she didn’t care at the moment. That kiss with Noel had completely disarmed and surprised her.
“Vaughn,” he announced as he put his hand forward to her.
“Clara,” she replied as they shook hands. But there was nothing about his touch that sent fireworks exploding.
“Well, Clara, let me get you another drink. Jeff, another vodka cranberry and a Carlton draft.” Vaughn signalled at the bartender before she could refuse. The bartender placed another drink in front of her. Clara took a twenty out of her pocket and put it on the bar counter.
“I’m not making you pay for your drinks, Clara. What kind of company would I be? And don’t worry. My uncle owns this place. Drinks are on him!” He grinned.
“Oh, okay then.” Clara shrugged and returned her money back in her pocket. Normally she would just walk away from free drinks. But something in her snapped, and she didn’t care. Clara looked over at Vaughn. That dimple was cute, or maybe it was her second vodka cranberry that was loosening her up.
Clara downed the rest of her drink. She could taste the vodka and feel the warmth of it as it slid down her throat. It seemed stronger than the previous vodka cranberry, but she ignored it. Her head started to buzz, and her body felt a little light. Before she knew it, she had a third in her hand.
“I do events and PR work,” Vaughn said. She looked over at him as he continued to talk; her eyelids felt heavy. She looked down to see him scratch at the label of his beer bottle.
Is that still his first?
Vaughn’s sudden hand on her knee had her eyes going wide. She was beyond tipsy, and she couldn’t will her body to move away from his touch. She felt defenceless and utterly exposed to him.
“Where’s your car?” he asked in a low-pitched voice. Clara looked him in the eyes, and she could see what he wanted. But her head was fuzzy and she couldn’t think straight.
“I, uhh,” she slurred as she pulled out her keys, dropping them on the counter.
“You don’t have your car keys on this set,” Vaughn said as he looked at them. Clara glanced at the keys. In her hurry to leave the apartment, she had picked up Noel’s spare key instead.
“Come on, drink this last shot of tequila,” he instructed as he placed the shot glass in her hand.
“When did I staaart… tequil-aa?” she slurred and hiccupped. Clara slowly blinked. She felt like she was losing time, only hearing chunks of what he was saying.
“I’ll take you back to mine,” Vaughn instructed. His hand wrapped around her wrist, his hold on her tight and strong.
“What… are you d-doing?” she yelped.
“I got you drinks. That means I get you!” he boasted, his eyes flamed with devilish hunger.
“No!” Clara hissed as she tried to free her wrist. He pushed himself onto her body, pinning her on the barstool. His forcefulness started to sober her up, her survival mode kicking in. She could still feel her body betray her, her limbs not reacting the way she wanted, but at least the haze started to dissipate.
“I’m not letting you go anywhere. You owe me a night!”
“I don’t owe you anything!” Clara pulled her wrist free after much struggling. She lazily took out the remaining cash from her pocket.
“H-here! Debt paid!” she spat out as she threw the money at Vaughn. His face burned with anger. Clara jumped off the barstool, wobbling, and tried to walk out of the pub. She managed a few more steps before his hand wrapped around her wrist and pushed her into the counter.
“What are you doing? Get off me!” She struggled. Panic tore through her; no one was going to help her, and she knew she was in trouble.
“Listen here, you little slut! I will have you!” His threat sent shivers through her body. He was forcing himself on her, and she physically couldn’t stop him.
“Get off her, Vaughn!” someone shouted. Looking over Vaughn’s shoulder, she saw a taller, bulkier man behind him. She swore she knew him, but she couldn’t place a name to his face. Those kind eyes had helped her once before.
“Get the fuck out of here, Max!” Vaughn spat out. Spit hitting Clara’s skin.
Max…
“I’m not going to warn you again! Get your hands off Clara. Now!” Max growled.
Vaughn relinquished his firm hold on her wrist. He stared her down and took a deep breath before turning and attempting to throw a fist at Max’s face. As if he expected it, Max dodged Vaughn’s fist and punched him in the stomach. Clara watched her attacker wither under Max’s fist and fall to the ground, Max hovering over him.
Max grabbed Vaughn by the shirt and brought him to his feet.
“If I see you come near her again, you and your family are gone. You hear me… Gone!” Max let go of his shirt and walked away from Vaughn, towards Clara.
“I would have fucked her up good!” Vaughn called out. Max stopped, his fist forming. He turned and punched Vaughn’s jaw, knocking him to the ground. No one in the bar came to Vaughn’s side. Max glared at the bartender before he walked towards her.
“Clara, are you okay?” he asked as he inspected her eyes and wrists.
“I—I,” she started to say. Adrenaline and fear started to rise in her. She willingly took drink after drink from him.
“You’ll be okay. Just sit down, and I’ll get some water in you. I’m sorry I wasn’t here sooner,” Max said as he helped her back onto one of the leather couches near the pool table.
“Max? I know you…” Clara said shaking her head, trying to remember him.
“I graduated from high school with your brother. I used to walk home with you both.” He smiled as his pale brown eyes shimmered up at her. “I’m going to destroy that son of a bitch! He tried that on my little cousin. I came as soon as I heard one of the boys tell me Vaughn Boulders was near Alex’s little sister,” he explained.
“Where were you?” she asked, looking around the pub.
“I was in the bar across the road. One of my boys noticed you and saw Boulders near you.”
"Oh my God, I’m such an idiot!” she gasped. The alcohol started to make her sick and caused her head to spin.
“No, you’re not. He does this a lot! Wish the coppers would arrest him.”
Clara looked down to see his knuckles starting to bleed.
“I’m sorry you had to save me from him! Thank you, Max.” Clara sighed.
“Not your fault. Alex wouldn’t be happy if I knew and didn’t do something. If I came any later and he raped you… God, I don’t know how I could live with that!”
“I’m sorry, Max.”
“Don’t worry about it, Clara. That fucker deserves to be knocked out!” A satisfied smile appeared on Max’s face. “What are you doing at a pub like this?” Max asked as he rested a hand on her shoulder.
“Noel is living with me, and I can’t take him. He’s an asshole!” she confessed. Max chuckled next to her.
“Yeah, I heard he was back in town.”
“Please don’t tell him I’m here. I don’t want him to know what happened. Just don’t tell him or Alex,” Clara begged.
“Of course,” Max promised, but Clara knew he didn’t mean it. Her stomach started to become queasy. She placed a hand over her mouth to stop herself.
“I think I’m going to be sick,” Clara said against the palm of her hand.
“Jeff, watch her. Give her a bucket while I find a cloth. Give her another drink, and I’ll make sure you lose your liquor license. I’ll be back in a second,” Max called. The bartender walked over and handed Clara a small bucket and a glass of water. As much as sh
e wanted to throw up, she could feel her eyelids begin to drop and her vision start to blur.
Noel did a quick scan of the pub. It was trashy, to say the least. More guys than girls, and somewhere Clara shouldn't be. That phone call made his gut drop and his heart sink. Clara had gotten herself into trouble, and it was purely his fault.
He didn’t care that he wasn't dressed for the occasion. Shorts and a T-shirt were too extravagant for this shamble of a pub. The girls here were trash, and the guys here were trashier. Noel spotted his friend Max hovering over a sleeping Clara. She looked wrecked, her hair messy and her face pale.
Guilt punched him straight in the stomach; it made his insides twirl, and almost sent his dinner rising. He summoned the strength to approach Max.
"How is she?" Noel asked, crouching down so he was eye level with the sleeping Clara.
"She's a mess, Noel. Whatever happened screwed her up big time. I thought she'd throw up, but she hasn't. I got here in time before Boulders tried anything on her. I had the bartender cut her off, too, before she blacked out. You need to take better care of her," Max scolded.
"Because she’s Alex's little sister."
"No, because she cares about you. She was mumbling your name while she’s been out. She was drinking with someone she shouldn’t have, someone who could have easily taken advantage of her." His eyes met Max's. Noel’s heart was hopeful at Max’s comment.
What have I done to you, Clara?
Anger rose in Noel. He was sitting in front of the TV waiting for her to come home so they could talk. But instead she was getting drunk with some lowlife, and he wasn’t there to protect her. He let Clara and Alex down. Instead Max was there to rescue her; jealousy bubbled in him. Noel was thankful Max was there to stop Boulders from trying to take advantage of her. He knew what he was in Clara’s life: a disease. And Noel planned to make it better, even if that meant keeping her at a distance.
“You won’t tell Alex will you?” he asked, looking up at Max, who shook his head.
“No, he doesn’t want to know about something like this. He wouldn’t take it well. He’d go after the son of a bitch. You know how he is about Clara,” Max explained. Noel frowned at the small smile Max offered.
“Thank you for protecting her. I really appreciate it. I keep letting her down, Max.” Noel sighed. He slept with Valerie and then kissed Clara; he could see why she went off drinking.
“You hurt her pretty bad.”
“Yeah, I thought if I pushed her away enough, I’d get space. Enough space that I could get her out of my system. Enough to not want to touch her,” Noel explained.
“I understand, Noel. Just don’t let her do stupid things. Clara could’ve been hurt a lot worse and Alex wouldn’t forgive you if something like this went further.”
“Thanks, Max. I appreciate what you’ve done,” Noel said as he looked at Clara. Her paleness made him sick. The idea that a sex-obsessed lowlife was planning on taking her made him violently ill.
“You really care about her,” Max pointed out. Normally he’d be repulsed at the idea of caring about Clara, but the revelation stuck to him.
“Yeah, I do, and it’s killing me to care about her like this,” Noel confessed. Normally he would shy away or deny his feelings about any girl, but this was Max; they grew up together. “How’d you know?”
“The way your eyes filled with worry when you saw her. It went from frantic to scared as hell. You looked like you were scared to lose her. You never looked at Valerie like that. So this must mean more to you.” Max looked down at Clara, and then at him.
“Yeah, and it’s confusing as hell. She’s Alex’s little sister; I can’t care about her like this. That’s why I slept with Valerie.”
“You slept with Valerie?” Shock filled Max’s face. Noel simply nodded. “Do you regret sleeping with her?” Max asked before his jaw clenched.
Noel sighed. “Yes. I hurt Clara more than I wanted to. I just thought if I slept with Valerie, I could extinguish these feelings I have for Clara, but it didn’t,” he explained as he moved a loose bit of Clara’s hair out of her face. Max carefully stood up, resting Clara back into the leather couch.
“Then stop pushing her away! I’ve heard everything that’s happened to Clara. I mean, who hasn’t! She needs someone like you. Stop thinking about how wrong it feels to care about her. It’s not wrong! You can’t define her as Alex’s little sister; she’s more than that. And if somehow this turns out to be more, then Alex won’t care. He’ll accept how you feel about her. You’re his best friend. He’ll understand. Just don’t push her away; she doesn’t need that. She needs someone willing to fight for her. She needs someone to see her as worthy enough, and that could be you if you just stopped doing such stupid things,” Max said, shaking his head at Noel.
“Thank you for tonight, Max; you kept her safe.” There was a moment of silence between them.
“This is more than just for now, isn’t it?” Max asked. Noel thought about it for a second. But a second was far too long.
“Yes,” he said as he looked at Clara. Even if she wouldn’t accept him, he would be hers.
“Then promise me this. If you end this, end it properly. Don’t walk away without a reason. Don’t go back to Boston and leave her behind thinking she’ll be okay. This isn’t just some girl, Noel. Don’t fuck up. She’s a forever girl, not one of your one-night stands. If you don’t plan on treating her properly, then you should walk away now. So what is she to you?” Max asked, his face serious.
“I don’t plan on ever walking away from her,” Noel replied. His statement made his heart stop for a moment. “This is more than just for now. I intend on making this last,” Noel continued.
A satisfied smile beamed on Max’s face. “Well, don’t let her down. I’ll let you take her home. You’ll work this out. Just give her time,” Max stated. He patted Noel’s shoulder and walked to the bar, determination in his eyes. Max looked ready to beat the bartender with just his fists alone.
As he reached the apartment, he crouched down and propped Clara against the wall while he unlocked the front door. Noel bent down and swept her back into his arms. He stood up, carrying her through the front door. The feeling of Clara’s head resting above his heart made it beat frantically. If only she wasn’t asleep or angry with him, then it would be sweeter. Noel kicked the front door closed behind him as he walked towards Clara’s bedroom door. He nudged her bedroom open with his shoulder.
He never once laid eyes on her room until now. Her white furniture, a window seat just underneath her window, the pictures on her bookshelf, her small knickknacks, everything about this room was Clara. Even the smell of her room had the faint scent of her perfume, making his blood pump.
He slowly walked over to her large bed. Noel crouched down, pulled the covers over, and started to gently place Clara down. She stirred and mumbled nonsense as he started to place her down. When she tugged at his shirt, they both landed on her bed. He stayed still for a moment on top of her; Clara’s arms circled around his neck, bringing him closer to her. Her grip on him was tight, but he didn't mind; he didn’t want to be away from her.
Noel shifted her body across the bed and started to move her arms away when she stirred.
“Don’t go,” she mumbled in her sleep. Noel froze. He didn’t want to go. He wanted to watch her sleep and have her in his arms. Kicking off his shoes, he climbed on the bed and lay next to her. He wanted this more than his heart could bear; he'd make it right between them. He had to.
He brought her over so that her head rested on his chest. If this was all he was ever going to get, then he’d selfishly enjoy this moment. Clara placed her hand on his chest and nuzzled into him. He’d never felt such emotions rise in him until he held her. He pulled the covers over their bodies. He’d leave before she woke. But for now, he’d savour this moment.
If only I could have you in my arms every time I slept and every time I woke.
Opening his eyes, he looked at the cl
ock to see that he’d been lying with Clara in his arms for almost two hours. Clara still had her head on his chest and her arm draped over him. He knew this wasn’t going to last. If he stayed too long, she’d wake and yell at him, and if he left now, he’d only leave a piece of himself with her. One she didn’t even know she held.
Noel carefully slid out of her embrace, got out of her bed, and placed the covers back over her. Clara let out a soft groan and her face made a cute frown. He made his way towards her bedroom door when he noticed a frame face down on her bookshelf.
Clara's pictures were mainly of her and Alex. He stopped and picked up the picture, bringing it to view. The first thing he noticed was Clara’s bright smile and the happiness clear in her eyes. His gaze made way to the person next to her.
Darren’s eyes didn’t hold love for her in the picture, and it made him angry. He had her in his grasp, and he didn’t even notice how good he had it.
He never loved her.
“Please don’t go,” Clara whispered. His heart ached at the sound of her voice. Noel placed the frame faced down back on the bookshelf and turned to her. Clara sat in her bed and rubbed her eyes. He walked over and crouched to look at her.
“Go back to sleep, Clara,” he hushed, stroking her face.
“I don’t want you to go. Forget what I said. Just stay with me, please,” she begged. He wasn’t sure if it was what she actually wanted, but he couldn’t refuse. He wanted one more chance, but he didn’t want to take advantage of her.
“Clara, go back to sleep. You don’t want this.”
“I need you,” she whispered as she placed her hand on his left cheek.
Oh hell, when she says she needs me like that, how can I refuse?
“Please,” she breathed. Noel nodded. He stood back up and planted a kiss on her forehead.
He saw something in her eyes when he moved back. He stared at her wondering what it was when Clara’s mouth found his. Her lips ignited the fire in him; her hands tangled in his hair. He needed to feel her. Just the touch of her hair wasn’t enough. He lowered her down on the bed and hovered over her, continuing their kiss. He felt it: the passion, the emotion, the need, and the heartbreak in their kiss. He was sure he'd only ever need her. Noel widened Clara’s legs and nestled between the gap; his kisses became frantic, and he could taste the sweetness of her lips. She was taking the breath out of his lungs with every kiss and every movement. He was completely and utterly lost in her.