by Odeda Yaari
Ron didn’t know what to say. Finally, he spoke tenderly. “That must have been very difficult.”
“It was. But I knew I was doing the right thing. Anyway, I got my brother in jail for a few years.” Dana decided to change the atmosphere. This was all too sad. She smiled at Ron. “Never mind, that’s all over now. And I’m trying to make my life into one big birthday party. What about you?”
Ron smiled back at her. The weight of the conversation lifted gradually. What was said still lingered in his mind, but he needed this lightness. He came closer to her and stroked her hair, kissed her gently, and then more powerfully.
When he pulled back, he asked, “Is that more like a birthday party?”
Dana smiled and nodded. “You know, when I was a kid, I invited my entire class for a birthday party at my house. Trouble was, I forgot to tell my mom.”
Ron laughed. Dana went on, with her hand caressing his leg.“I told her about it just one hour before everyone came. It was a Friday, after all the cleaning and cooking. I drove her crazy. And really, all I wanted was for everyone to buy me nice presents, to be a princess.”
Ron laughed. “So, was there a party or not?”
“No way! Before Shabbat? And get the house all dirty? I had to explain to everyone why the party got canceled at the last minute. Can you imagine? But it was okay, they forgave me pretty quickly.”
“I guess you were pretty popular,” said Ron, with a slight tinge of envy in his voice, which Dana picked up on.“What good did that do me? I didn’t really study and did lots of stupid things, so you shouldn’t feel bad about who you are. You’re a catch, and you don’t even know it!”
“Dana, to me you’re a princess. And I’ll even buy you a birthday present.”
“Then let’s celebrate.” She smiled at him.
She poured them some more wine and slowly unwrapped one of the chocolates, then placed it into Ron’s mouth.
“I want one, too,” she said.
He unwrapped another chocolate and brought it to her mouth. But that wasn’t enough for Dana. His two fingers felt her tongue and lips sucking gently. She knew Ron wasn’t going to make a move, so she took control. Slowly she climbed on top of him, making him lie back on the sofa, kissing him, using her teeth to take off his shirt, until he started cooperating and stroking her body. He couldn’t believe this was happening to him, he wanted things to go slowly. When he took off her shirt, he couldn’t keep his adoring eyes off her body. Dana giggled. She knew exactly when to stop so that he would want more, and soon. She was going to let things heat up and in a little while stop everything, gently. As if that were how things were meant to happen.She dove back in, her mind set on enjoying the few minutes she had at her disposal. She kissed his chest and sent her hand down his pants.
***
As she got dressed, she took another sip of wine, looked deep into Ron’s eyes and whispered, “Tonight was amazing. Let’s do this again soon. And this time, we won’t make any stops.”
Ron looked at her. He wanted this to go on so badly, but something—he couldn’t say what—made him stop. He knew that earned him Dana’s appreciation. If she only knew how much he wanted her.“No stops,” he mumbled, stroking her hair and kissing her gently. “When? Can we make it one hour from now?”
Dana smiled at him. “I wish, but I have to get going. It’s getting really late.”
Ron looked at his watch. It was almost two a.m. He really hadn’t been getting much sleep lately. “How about this weekend, then?”
“Sounds good, but let me check. I’ll call tomorrow to let you know for sure,” she said, trying not to make any more promises. Usually her weekends were devoted to Garry and Matan.Ron tried, not very successfully, to hide his disappointment.“But don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”
She clung to him again, stroking his back, her hands sliding down into his jeans. “I haven’t inspected everything yet, so you can be sure I’ll be back to finish my research.”
***
When she left Ron’s apartment, she felt that despite the massive differences between them, she was becoming attached to the sad, insecure guy who, like her, was busy searching for something to replace the real love that they both miss so much. Ron was fully invested in a development that would save the world from drugs, but his real purpose was to win love and recognition, and when that didn’t happen, he ran away. Her team members reported his online activities to her, and she knew Ron was seeking refuge in gambling, walking a thin line that could end up in a fall and make him lose everything he was working for. She was the same, putting all her energy and time into the search for a warm and loving home, while yearning for the storms and dangers of her own thin line.
Sophie thought of Ron again. Yes, she was going to meet him over the weekend, just to make him feel at ease. She was probably going to get into bed with him as well. Who knows, perhaps she needed it, too.
15
Ron stood at the door, flustered. All his senses were alert, and he still couldn’t decide whether he should feel disappointed that he didn’t get to sleep with Dana or pleased about what had happened between them. He closed his eyes, remembering what he had experienced.She wants to see me again the day after tomorrow, this weekend, he thought, and he hoped she wouldn’t have other plans. But maybe, he thought, I should take things more slowly and let her run after me more a bit, like the guys say. On the other hand, that meant facing the grim reality of spending another lonely weekend all by himself. He was thoroughly confused. He knew he wasn’t going to be able to fall asleep, so he decided to turn off the computer and play a little, like he had done on previous nights.
He logged on to his favorite gambling site and started playing. By now, he had no use for his notes to know which plays would lead him to profit. So, when he woke up the next morning, he knew what he was going to do that weekend. For the first time in his life, he was going to go to a casino and play for real. That would also give him the chance to maintain some distance and cool off.
Feeling so close to Dana and sensing the intimacy that had formed between them scared him. Not because these weren’t all things he wanted, but because he was scared of being disappointed again. For the first time, he felt he was willing to shift the center of his life. Perhaps an intimate relationship with a woman could dull the desperate need to prove himself to his parents, he dared to think.
Ron called the travel agency he always worked with and booked himself a deal for the weekend, including a flight and a stay at a casino hotel. He went with the agent’s recommendation—Barcelona. He thought there would be less chance of meeting any Israelis there. Ron said he’d come by the travel agency right away to pick up his airplane ticket and hotel voucher. Then he rang his secretary Efrat and told her he was going to be away from the office until Monday, and wasn’t going to be available by phone. If anything urgent came up, she was to pass it on to David. Before Efrat had the chance to ask any questions or forward the call to David, he hung up.There was one more phone call he had to make, to Dana. He decided to tell her that he’d been called to an urgent business meeting abroad and would be gone for the weekend. Luckily, Dana did not pick up. He left a short message on her voicemail, promising to call again as soon as he got back. For a moment, he thought the message sounded too cold, but there was nothing he could do about that.
It was ten a.m. and he had two more hours before he had to leave for the airport. He went to take a shower, threw some clothes in a small suitcase, and was ready to go. Before he left the house, he called his bank to check his balance. Just to be on the safe side, he asked the teller to cash in his savings plan and transfer the money to his checking account. He stuffed the papers on which he had scribbled the possibilities and probabilities of online games during the previous nights into his small handbag, and made sure he had his platinum credit card. For a moment, he considered whether he should take his cell phone. Then he decided no one was going to look for him anyway. Ron was so excited. Never in his life ha
d he done something so spontaneous and careless, something that was purely for himself. This time, he dared to do something that for him was reckless, even irresponsible.
***
The phone at Sophie’s house was ringing. It was nine thirty Thursday morning. She had just gotten home after taking Matan to school and doing some grocery shopping. Yoni was on the line.
“I was just about to call you and report in,” she said apologetically.
Yoni interrupted her and asked that she come straight to the office. His voice was full of urgency. Sophie panicked for a minute and thought something might have happened to Ron between last night, when she had left him all emotional, and this morning.
She dumped the groceries on the kitchen table and left for the office.
***
Without any pleasantries, Yoni started right away and said, “Half an hour ago, I received a message from Kobi that Ron booked a flight for today to Barcelona. He’s leaving on the twelve o’clock flight and will be staying at Hotel Rivoli, where there’s a famous casino. I don’t know if the casino has anything to do with his trip, but that’s something we have to look into. We know that no one at Ron’s office knew about any scheduled business trip. They don’t know what this trip is about either. Perhaps it really is a secret business trip and Ron is keeping things from his partner. Or maybe we’re on to some little loophole in his personality. In any case, we’ve managed to book you on a flight to Barcelona via Paris, leaving at four p.m. That gives you a few hours to get ready. A driver will pick you up at two and bring you all the paperwork. We’ve also booked a room at the same hotel Ron will be staying at.”
Sophie, who was used to taking trips on short notice, was not taken aback by the urgency of the matter. What she did find surprising, however, was the fact that last night when she had been with Ron, he said nothing about a trip. They even talked about meeting over the weekend. Something happened between yesterday and today, and that would be something she would have to look into.
Yoni gave her a credit card and named a five-figure sum that was at her disposal, in case she needed it. He also gave her an envelope full of cash. All the administrative details had been taken care of for her. She knew she could count on Yoni to have thought of everything. Her head was full of dozens of things she had to take care of at home in the few hours she had before the flight.
***
Sophie rushed to get her packing done. She was going to need a business suit as well as an elegant evening gown and fancy jewelry, in case she would need to visit the casino. She also threw in a lacy nightgown and a short casual dress, in case she met Ron in the middle of the day.
At two, she was already seated in the back of the car, all packed and ready, as if she were going on a trip that had been planned long in advance.
The car stopped at the entrance to the airport and the driver waited for Sophie to get out. He called her name, awakening her from her reveries and bringing her back to reality. She gathered her things and entered the departures hall.
***
Ron arrived at Ben Gurion Airport disguised behind a pair of sunglasses and wearing a baseball hat. To his relief, the line at the check-in counter wasn’t long, and within a short time he was through passport control. He took a seat in the corner of the hall and hid behind a large newspaper.
The last thing I need is for someone who knows my parents to see me and start asking questions, he thought. He felt as though the terrible thing he was about to do was written all over his forehead. He had to wait half an hour till boarding started, which he spent feeling anxious and nervous. The minute the gate opened, he stood at the front of the line, yearning to disappear into the belly of the plane.
16
As the plane landed in Barcelona, Ron rushed to pick up his little suitcase and left the terminal. He showed the taxi driver the address on the hotel voucher and eased into the back seat of the cab. For a moment, he had second thoughts and almost asked the driver to turn the car around and take him back to the airport, but he didn’t. What’s the worst that could happen? he thought. I can always just stay in my room or wander around this amazing city and tell everyone I needed a few days to clear my head, which I do.He tried to justify his actions, but the pestering little devil on his shoulder knew that wasn’t what he was going to do.
The hotel stood on a central boulevard of the city, in a building with an antique façade that did not give any indication of the opulent interior. Ron walked across the lobby, stepping on the soft red carpet, admiring the vintage furniture, which was arranged into small seating areas. The lobby was dimly lit, and there were hardly any people there. He came up to the reception desk, checked in, and got his key card. Before leaving the front desk, he casually turned to the clerk.
“Excuse me,” he said in an almost whisper.
“Yes, sir?”
“Can you please tell me where the hotel casino is, and what are its opening hours?”
The clerk smiled understandingly. He had met many guests like Ron in the past, first time visitors to a casino. He immediately reached into a compartment and retrieved a brochure with all the necessary information for a novice like him.
Ron went up to his room. The splendor and luxury immediately made him feel pampered. He placed his suitcase and handbag on the bed and went to the bathroom to run himself a bath.
That’s it! he thought. I’ll have a nice hot bath and a good meal and feel like myself again. That’ll stop me from doing anything stupid.He took off his clothes, throwing them on the floor in disarray, poured himself a drink from the minibar, and sank into the lovely warm water. Within minutes, he could feel the drink flowing through his veins and the lump of tension that had built up in his throat melting away. He was filled with a sense of tranquility and carelessness. He felt carefree and detached from all responsibilities or commitments. Slowly but surely, his mind was cleared of the formulas and experiments of his work, of his parents’ judgmental faces, of the scared little boy and the lonely man. He closed his eyes and thought of Dana’s beautiful face, her curious eyes and limber body, moving sensuously inside those tight pants and little top. Slowly, he took off her top and his hands began moving up the tight pants and onto her back, unhooking her bra. The bra fell to the ground and a pair of perky breasts pressed against his chest. Ron started pulling down her pants, revealing her skimpy panties, slowly. He had all the time in the world, she was all his, soft and willing, with no intention of stopping. He felt his member hardening, yearning to break the last barrier between him and her.Suddenly he opened his eyes in a panic. I cannot, he thought, let Dana know anything about this little casino adventure of mine. It’ll ruin what we have.
All the tranquility and easiness that had engulfed him disappeared at once. He got out of the tub in a sulk and wiped himself down with a big, soft towel. Then he put on the same clothes he had worn before and went out to roam the boulevard. La Rambla, the city’s most colorful, vibrant street, was buzzing with people. The open cafés were full and there were people all over, watching the jugglers, musicians, and street performers that were spread along the boulevard. Ron felt a liberating sense of freedom all around him. He strolled down the street, blending in with the tourists and locals. Everyone was part of one big street party. When he grew a bit tired, he took a seat at one of the many open cafés and ordered a big glass of red sangria, packed full of delicious fruit. The sweetness of the drink and amount of alcohol in it restored his peace of mind and made him realize he’d had nothing to eat since that morning. He ordered a plate of local tapas, and a good bottle of wine to go with it.
When he returned to the hotel, he thought he’d just take a peek at the casino. The guard at the door gave him a somewhat suspicious look and then tried to explain to him politely that he couldn’t enter the casino dressed like that.“Suit and tie,” he said.
Ron gave up and went to his room. He turned on the TV, stared at it for a few minutes, and decided to go to bed. Except he couldn’t relax there either.
He got up, put on his suit and tie, and went back down to the casino.As he stepped past the threshold, an elegant, spacious hall revealed itself to him. Everything spoke of opulent, seductive riches. The walls were decorated with gold tiles and the floor was covered in wall-to-wall red carpet. The place was buzzing with people and sounds he was not accustomed to: chatter and excitement and endless mechanical sounds. He heard the dealers skillfully handing out cards, the spinning roulette wheel, and the little towers of chips being scooped up or tumbling over. Every now and then, he heard the clatter of flowing coins, followed by cries of joy. His head was spinning with the sights, the colors, the sounds, and the alcohol. Ron stood there for a minute, trying to find his bearings. In a strange and unexpected way, he felt overwhelmed, but not intimidated in any way. In fact, he felt good—ready and able to show the world, and himself, who he was and what he was capable of. He looked around the room at the well-dressed people sitting around the large tables and sipping drinks handed to them by scantily clothed girls. They were laughing and smiling, and it was as if they were all flirting with one another, all part of one big celebration Ron wanted to be included in.
He felt that tingling sensation in his hands and knew it was too late to back down. He went to the cashier, bought a pile of chips, and stepped over to one of the blackjack tables. This was nothing like what he had been used to playing online. This was fast-paced, not just him sitting alone in front of the computer anymore. Now there were people all around, dozens of eyes watching him, and beautiful women smiling at him. The stern, unapproachable dealer took the place of the computer, and Ron needed a few minutes to get the hang of things.He tried to focus, to think back to his notes, the results of countless attempts, and placed his money on the table. And then, as if this were a science experiment in a lab, Ron became cold and calculated. All other thoughts left his head, and he was totally immersed in the game. Pretty soon, he had quite a large pile of chips before him. At first, he had played for small amounts, but now he started increasing the sums, and it looked like the wheel of fortune was spinning just for him. People started to huddle around him, giving advice, admiring his success, and clapping.