“Yes, it grew back amazingly fast!” said her friend.
“What?” Aphrodite asked, automatically smoothing a hand over her lustrous hair.
“Well, I heard you had a fight with Isis and she pulled out half of your hair,” said the first girl.
“I heard the same thing,” said the second girl, “only I heard you were bald now. Is that a wig?”
“No! It is not a wig,” Aphrodite huffed. What a way to start things! “Thank you for your time, ladies.” She looked down the line. “Next!”
Two more girls stepped forward.
“Where are the scratches?” asked one before Aphrodite could speak. “I heard that Isis has fingernails three inches long and she scratched your arms to ribbons.”
“No, I heard she scratched your face,” said the other.
“Neither is true, as you can see,” said Aphrodite.
“But she did call you a twit, right?”
“I heard it was a two-faced twit,” said the other girl.
“Once and for all—Isis and I did not have a fight!” she said a bit more loudly than she’d intended. For a moment the two mortals looked startled, but then they nodded. Even so, Aphrodite wasn’t sure they believed her. Recalling that she was here to appease mortals, not argue with them, she managed to smile. “Thank you for coming, girls. Next!”
As they turned to go, one of them glanced back at Aphrodite. “Good luck,” she said. “Maybe you don’t know it, but everyone came today because we all want you to win. After all, you are one of us—a Greek! And we believe that you and only you are the true goddess of love.”
Aphrodite stared after her, and a warm, happy feeling filled her chest. She hadn’t wanted it to get out that Isis had challenged her right to the title of goddess of love. But now that it had, she could see it was actually a good thing. Hearing the news, these mortals had had an instant change of heart about her. Amazing! They’d been won over to her side in less than a day!
7
Godboys and Pyramids
AS THE LINE MOVED ALONG, APHRODITE met hundreds of girls. Many of them had everything going for them—brains, good personalities, talent, and beauty. But she didn’t choose these girls for Pyg. Instead, she directed them to a message board where she’d had Pheme post a copy of her quiz. She told them to send their answers to her at MOA, promising that she would work on finding them true love and get back to them.
Toward afternoon, some of the godboys from MOA showed up. Apparently, Apollo, Dionysus, Ares, Eros, and Poseidon had heard about the competition and had come by to get in on the fun. She wished they hadn’t, because they were distracting the mortal girls. The five of them hung around in the nearby field roughhousing and showing off their godboy skills. It was their way of flirting.
Apollo and Eros were practicing their archery, trying to impress the girls with their perfect bull’s-eyes. Ares and Poseidon were arm wrestling to show off their bulging muscles. And Dionysus, wearing a blindfold, was wandering around trying to “accidentally” bump into girls. On the blindfold, he’d written: LOVE IS BLIND. Sometimes it is, and sometimes it isn’t, thought Aphrodite.
Still, the boys were all so handsome and intriguing that the mortal girls were watching them instead of listening to her. When she’d had enough, she told the girls in line to take a break. Then she stomped over to confront the godboys. “I’m trying to work here,” she told them.
“We’re not stopping you!” said Ares, grinning at her. The sun gleamed on his wavy blond hair as he picked up a shimmery godball they’d brought from MOA and prepared to throw it. His four friends ran into the field, ready to intercept. “We heard you were planning to start another war, so we wanted to come watch,” he added, his eyes twinkling with laughter.
“What is that supposed to mean?” she demanded as he let the ball fly. As it zigzagged, did a figure eight, and then flew sideways, the other godboys chased it.
Ares gazed at her speculatively. “You and your friend Isis have started something with this competition. Mortals all over earth are rooting for their favorite goddess. Some favor you. Some favor her.”
“So everyone’s enthusiastic. What’s wrong with that?”
“There are bound to be arguments.” He pointed toward a scuffle going on a distance away. He was right! Even now, several mortals were fighting over who should win—her or Isis! “If you’re chosen, the Egyptians will be mad. If Isis is, the Greeks will be,” he added.
Aphrodite recalled one of Ms. Nemesis’s lessons in Revenge-ology class: Insult a goddess and you insult those who worship her. Greeks were certainly taking that to heart. It appeared she was in a no-win situation.
“So I’m right back to where I started,” she murmured, forgetting Ares was standing there.
“What?” he asked. Having caught the ball, Apollo and the other godboys drew near, ready to start another game, but Ares waved them off. He put a hand on her arm. “What’s wrong? Did one of these mortals say something to offend you?” His eyes narrowed and his hands balled into fists. He glanced around, looking ready to punish whomever she named.
“No, nothing like that,” she said with a quick shake of her head.
“Then what?” She looked up into his concerned blue eyes. She and Ares had had their ups and downs and he had said things that had hurt her in the past. But right now he seemed so kind and strong, and . . . and trustworthy. Like she could tell him anything. Before she knew it, she was admitting the truth about her grade, Pyg, and everything. “I know you enjoy battle, but I feel bad about starting the Trojan incident. My actions caused a lot of trouble for mortals.”
He grinned. “Trojan incident?”
Smiling, she elbowed him gently. He made an oof sound and pretended to be hurt, then smiled back at her and took her hand in his. “Thanks for telling me. I care about you, you know?”
“Woo woo!” called Eros, zeroing in on the handholding from downfield where the boys were still tossing around the ball. Dionysus put his little fingers between his lips and whistled. Apollo and Poseidon started making kissing noises.
Aphrodite glared at them and stepped back from Ares so he dropped her hand. “Ye gods—are they in first grade? Can you get them out of here? They’re distracting the girls from my matchmaking competition.”
“Sure,” said Ares. “Anything for you.” Blue eyes sparkling with humor, he trotted off to join his friends.
As she headed back to the agora, Aphrodite peeked toward the field just in time to see Ares glance her way, then say something to the other godboys that made them laugh. She turned away, suddenly embarrassed and a little angry. Had he made a joke about her requesting the boys to leave? What if she’d been wrong to trust him? Maybe he was even telling them what she’d confessed! She hadn’t told him not to, but he should know better!
Minutes later the godboys began loosening the wings on their sandals and were soon moving off in the direction of MOA. So Ares had succeeded in convincing them to leave at least. She sighed. Just when you thought you had godboys figured out, you didn’t.
She had only been apart from her goddessgirl friends for one day, but she already missed them. Although she hoped they were having fun, she also wished they were here. Talking things over with them would be so helpful.
Still, they were probably having fun and she was not going to interrupt their vacation. She’d tell them everything later, once she’d succeeded in changing her grade. She imagined how they’d all laugh about it then. For now, though, it wasn’t so funny because her success wasn’t assured. Yet. This competition was hers to win or lose. Taking her seat on the golden chair again, she smiled at the girl at the front of the line. “Next.”
Meanwhile, back in Egypt, the other goddessgirls were heading from Cairo toward the pyramids of Giza. Athena took the lead of their small caravan riding on a butter-colored camel with Hathor. Behind them, Persephone rode on a dark brown one with Ma’at; while Artemis shared a white one with Bastet. Each pair of goddesses sat atop a colorful
saddle that was designed to protect the tall hump on their camel’s back.
As they passed through the bazaar on their way, Athena noticed a long line of girls streaming from a large tent. “What’s going on over there?” she asked.
“Oh, nothing,” Hathor replied evasively. “Did you bring the map?”
“Yes,” said Athena. She forgot all about the line of girls as she tried to plan the best route. Reading the map wasn’t easy—camel rides were bumpy! “Giza is west of Cairo through the Sahara desert,” she said at last. “It looks like we’re going the right way.”
“Don’t worry,” Hathor replied, her body rolling easily with each step and sway of the camel. “I’ve been to the pyramids a mummillion times. We won’t get lost.”
Athena thought about asking exactly how much a mummillion amounted to, and if it was even a real number. And why had Hathor asked her to check the map if she already knew the way? But just then, Persephone interrupted. “Are we there yet?” she asked, half-jokingly, fanning herself with her hands. “I already feel like a wilted pansy.”
“You’ll get used to the heat after a while,” said Ma’at. “Egypt and most of northern Africa is desert. That’s why we rode out so early this morning. But don’t worry—we’ll stay inside as much as we can when we reach the pyramids.”
“You mean we can go inside them?” Athena asked, overhearing.
“Of course. We’re goddesses,” Hathor said in a snooty tone. “And in your honor, the pyramids are closed to mortals today. We’ll have them all to ourselves.”
At the rear of their caravan, Artemis and Bastet were busy talking about one of their favorite subjects—animals. “Is it true that camels store water in their humps?” asked Artemis.
Bastet burst out laughing. “No!”
“Then how do they go so long without drinking?”
“They have adapted to survive in the desert. They don’t sweat as much as horses, and their coats help reflect sunlight.” Her cat wasn’t perched on her shoulder today. She’d left it in the dorm, explaining to Artemis that her cat hated camel rides.
An hour later, they came up over a sand dune, and suddenly the three pyramids of Giza stood majestically before them. Athena’s camel made a loud and long sound that was somewhere between a snore and a honk, as if to announce their arrival.
“That one’s the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu!” said Athena. “I recognize it from one of the travel brochures.”
“Correct,” said Hathor. “It’s the oldest and largest of the three pyramids.”
Bastet gave her camel a command so she and Artemis could dismount. The camel bent its front legs, going to its knees. Its entire body tilted forward.
“Whoa!” said Artemis, as she fell forward with the motion. “This feels weird.”
“Don’t worry, you won’t fall off,” said Bastet. The camel rocked backward then, bending its back legs under it. Then it rocked forward again and settled down until it was lying on its belly with all four legs folded underneath.
Bastet swung from the saddle and stepped down, and Artemis did as well. Copying them, the others dismounted too. Then they all headed for the pyramids. By the time they reached the entrance, the wax cone on Ma’at’s head had begun to melt, releasing a pleasing spicy fragrance. Seeing Persephone’s curiosity, she explained that this was the way Egyptians perfumed themselves.
“You see before you the Grand Gallery,” Hathor announced grandly, as they stepped inside the Great Pyramid. “We’re using it for an exhibit of hieroglyphs this month,” she added, leading them up an incline.
Once their eyes got used to the darkness, Persephone peered closely at some of the hieroglyphs hanging on the gallery walls. Spying a blue flower with pointed leaves on one panel, she smiled. “A blue lotus!”
Ma’at nodded, coming to stand by her. “It’s a symbol of rebirth. Because at night the lotus closes and sinks underwater. Then at dawn it rises and opens again.”
“I wonder if a lotus could grow in the River Styx in the Underworld. The flower is so beautiful and the Underworld can be so dreary,” mused Persephone.
Ma’at looked as if she had a question, but before she could ask it, Hathor waved them on. “This way to the Queen’s Chamber,” she told them.
“Will the queen mind us barging in?” asked Artemis.
Bastet giggled. “I doubt it. She’s long dead—a mummy now. Robbers looted these pyramids long ago. The gold treasures and artifacts are gone, but the pyramids still remain as great monuments.”
After they stepped inside the Queen’s Chamber, Ma’at pointed to a feather symbol among the hieroglyphs on the walls. “That is my symbol,” she said.
“There’s a hieroglyph just for you?” Athena asked, impressed.
“There’s one for each of us,” said Hathor. She pointed to a symbol of a bird in a square. “This one’s mine.”
“I’m even in the Book of the Dead,” Ma’at added proudly. She took them to a book set upon a pedestal. “The book doesn’t mention the Underworld you describe, Persephone. Therefore, it must not exist.”
“It does too. I’ve been there!” Persephone insisted. “It’s where my crush lives and where the dead hang out.”
All three Egyptian goddesses gasped. “You’re wrong,” said Hathor, folding her arms.
“Death is the beginning of a journey to the Afterlife,” said Bastet. “Everyone knows that.”
Ma’at nodded. “At the beginning of such a journey, my feather helps weigh whether someone was good or bad in life. See?” She pointed to a scene on the wall in which a feather was being used as a weight on one side of a hanging scale. “And if you are good, the Book of the Dead will offer you the magic spells needed to pass into the Afterlife.”
“But—” Persephone began, ready to argue.
“Perhaps we should move on,” said Athena, tugging at her arm.
“Uh, right,” said Persephone. She forced herself to smile politely at Ma’at. “I guess that, in matters of the Underworld, we’ll just have to agree to disagree.”
After a minute, Ma’at gave her a small nod. “But I hope we can still be friends in spite of our disagreement, yes?” Persephone sent her a warm smile in return. “Yes.” Friends didn’t have to agree on everything, after all.
Hathor stepped back into the hall. “Follow me to the King’s Chamber.”
As they entered the next chamber, Artemis felt something brush her leg. Letting out a squeal, she grabbed at Bastet. “What was that?” She was brave about many things, but this room was just plain spooky! Glancing down, she saw that a white cat had appeared out of nowhere. Then she noticed that several more were slinking around the chamber as well. They acted as if they owned it!
“Don’t worry,” said Bastet, as if there was nothing unusual about seeing cats in the pyramids. “They won’t hurt you.”
Hathor smirked, then began showing the others around the chamber.
“What is it with all the cats around here?” Artemis muttered, attempting to cover up her embarrassment.
“That shop I went to in the bazaar had shelves and shelves of cat statues, cat-shaped bowls, cat earrings—”
“Do you have something against cats?” Bastet interrupted. A gray one paused nearby and looked up at Artemis, as if it wanted to hear her reply too.
“Not really.” Artemis shrugged. “I’ve just never been around them much. I have dogs.” On the ground nearby, the gray cat stretched its front legs out, showing its claws. Artemis eyed it warily.
“It’s okay to pet her. The tour guides feed them and they’re all tame,” said Bastet. “Don’t be scared.”
“I’m not!” said Artemis. To prove it, she knelt and commanded, “Here, kitty, kitty.” But the cat ignored her and began licking its front paw with a pink tongue. Artemis looked up at Bastet. “Why won’t it come? My dogs always come when I call. Well, most of the time.”
Bastet shrugged. “I suppose it’s because cats are smarter than dogs.”
Artem
is stood abruptly. “I don’t think so.”
“It’s true!” Bastet insisted. “Cats come only when they wish to. Dogs dumbly obey.”
“Dogs are not dumb!” As heat rose in Artemis’s cheeks, Athena and Persephone came up behind her and gently hooked their arms through hers.
“I’m sure she didn’t mean to imply that dogs are dumb,” said Persephone. “Right, Bastet?”
Bastet looked anxious. “Actually, I have never been around dogs very much. I didn’t mean to give insult in any case. We can remain friends as Persephone and Ma’at have agreed to, even though we disagree?”
A slow smile spread over Artemis’s face. “Deal. Maybe sometime you can visit me at MOA and meet my dogs.”
Bastet smiled back. “Maybe so.”
“Our tour is complete,” Hathor announced after they’d been through every tunnel and examined every display. “Shall we return to Cairo?”
All six goddesses retraced their steps and exited the Great Pyramid, then set off on their return trip by camel. When they reached Cairo, they passed the bazaar again. The line of girls streaming from the large tent they’d seen earlier had shortened. Now they could read a sign that sat on an easel at the tent’s entrance:
CALLING ALL EGYPTIAN GIRLS:
HELP ISIS BEAT APHRODITE
IN THE MORTAL MATCHMAKER COMPETITION!
“What’s going on over there?” Athena asked.
“Isis is interviewing mortal girls for that contest she and Aphrodite are having,” said Hathor. “And now you’ll have to excuse us. The three of us promised to help her.”
Ma’at and Bastet shared a look. From their expressions, it appeared that they didn’t quite trust Hathor and thought she might be up to something.
“But if Isis is here, where’s Aphrodite?” asked Persephone.
“She must have gone back to Greece,” Athena guessed. “She’s probably doing the same thing. Interviewing girls that Pygmalion might like. But why didn’t she tell us?”
Hathor grinned. “You are every bit as brainy as they say, Athena. As a matter of fact, I almost forgot.” She pulled a note from her pocket. “Isis asked me to give you this. It’s from your little friend—Aphroditty.”
Aphrodite the Diva (Goddess Girls) Page 7