I stepped back again, looking down to the pavement, afraid of my own thought. What had he done? Held a boy in midair and then lifted me out of the way of a reversing car. No, it couldn’t be that. There was another answer. But not one could be rationalized in my mind at the moment. I gulped.
“I won’t hurt you,” he said as if I needed the words to be said aloud. I shifted my eyes back up into the bright glow of his gaze, to once again find the beautiful green waiting for me. I couldn’t look away anymore, and it seemed neither could he.
But with the sudden movement of his hand rising toward my cheek, I instinctively tensed, closing my eyes, frightened of the expected warm touch from his skin. The anticipation lingered with the cold air beginning to irritate the tip of my nose. The very silence had begun to raise my curiosity. I could feel the fear lowering its guard with each swallow from my throat. My lips twitched with a charged bravery.
“What are you?” I asked.
My eyes flashed opened as if by command of my words, only to see he was gone. And looking around, I realized so was Ross. I was alone. The fear collapsed back on me fiercely, as if to remind me that it had never left.
I obeyed my instinct and ran to my car. Once inside I locked the doors. I needed to get home before my body went into complete shock. I could see by my shaking hands turning the keys that the effects had already begun.
When I walked into the house, I forced a simple grin out toward my mother. My momentum never let my legs stop walking once I opened the front door. “I’m going to bed.”
I was grateful it was the one time my mom didn’t question me about my night, especially seeing as I was only able to make it enough steps to the entry of my bedroom. Once I shut the door behind me, I felt as if the imaginary director had yelled “cut”, letting me finally involuntarily collapse to my knees. I closed my eyes, sitting on my heels with my hands resting on my thighs, slowly filtering in a shaky breath. What the hell just happened? I wanted to hear Sean’s voice to soothe me, but I didn’t have the strength to grab my phone from inside my purse, which I had thrown to the bed a moment before my collapse.
Suddenly I heard a knock at my door. Damn. I opened my eyes before my hands helped lift me back to my feet. I knew my mom would definitely question me if she found me on the floor like that. I breathed out two deep sighs in order to calm my expression before I was ready. Action, I thought.
“Come in,” I said.
The door opened, but it wasn’t my mother. It was Sean that peeked his head through the frame gap, before stepping inside my room and shutting the door behind him. I didn’t waste the time to rush him. I wrapped my arms underneath his as I laid my head to his chest. The instant warmth of his presence lifted me to a better place.
“I thought you had to work late,” I said.
“I just got back and felt like I should stop by and see you.” I felt him gently pat the back of my hair comfortingly. “Is everything all right?”
“I don’t know how you do it,” I said.
“Do what?”
“Make yourself appear right when I need you. But I’m glad that you do.”
“It’s a gift. Now are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”
I finally stepped back to look up at him. But now in the moment of truth, I knew that I couldn’t say anything. I couldn’t be the reason that Sean lost his friends. But I also knew that was what Ross and Nick were hoping on, and I wasn’t keeping quiet for their sake. I have to tell him. I opened my mouth, but still nothing came out. I curled my fingers into fists, looking for the courage to speak.
“I got . . . ” This was my chance as my tongue lingered with the words. Say it. “Freaked out earlier.”
Sean narrowed his gaze with a prepared anger. “Freaked out by what?”
I gulped, not quite sure why this was so hard to say. I hadn’t even begun to wrap my head around Liam Alexander. “I forgot my purse, and when I went back for it the janitor was really creepy.” I rolled my eyes for dramatics with a small shrug. “But you know how my imagination can be.”
I sighed with the guilt weighing me down like lead. I’ll admit the janitor wasn’t going to be my friend but he didn’t deserve the persona I was building of him. I expected a lecture of any kind for being stupid enough to not bring a friend with me. I even welcomed it in order to serve as punishment for lying.
Instead Sean merely pulled his neck back to gaze at me with his brow lifted. “Are you sure that’s all?”
I nodded, maybe a little too much. It wasn’t as if he knew I was lying but more that I wasn’t telling the truth. Luckily he was choosing to ignore it, and I was grateful.
My eyes shifted to the floor with guilt.
“I know it sounds a bit childish, but would you stay until I fall asleep?”
“Sure,” he said.
I wasn’t sure how long it would take me to fall asleep, but I was glad Sean had stayed to do what he had always done best, protect me. Lucky for him, I would have no problem staying away from Liam Alexander now. I wasn’t even sure where to begin with Liam. My mind could barely decipher the idea of what I had seen, let alone how to articulate it into words.
There must be an explanation for it all, but for now I laid under the covers, moving to curl into Sean, with my head rested on the warmth of his chest. It was like sunshine that radiated around my body. The warmth on my skin was like that sensation of hot water from the shower on a cold day. Just being near him made me feel better.
“Sean,” I said.
“Yeah, Em?”
“I’ll stay away from Liam.”
There was a few seconds of silence where I felt like I could almost see his eyes shift away with a smile of accomplishment.
“Why now? Did something happen with him tonight?”
I shook my head, while my mind knew the opposite. “No, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I believe you. There is something strange about him.” I paused to exhale at the memory of tonight. “So, you don’t have to worry about him anymore.”
I thought of how different things would be if Sean had seen what I did. He would surely be even more protective of me. But if he had known, then it would be something he would have already told me. Even if I knew how hypocritical I seemed by withholding what I had seen tonight.
I felt Sean’s light, comforting kiss on my scalp before he laid his head on top of my own. “Promise?”
I sighed into the warm silence crawling around the two of us.
“I promise.”
6. Curiosity
I had woken early Saturday morning with a panic plaguing my mind. I must have checked the Daily Washington News five times, front to back. I even watched two early morning news editions before my dad had even gotten out of bed. It felt excessive and I realized it must have looked that way too as the corner of my eye caught sight of my mother’s many worried glances. But I was almost certain I would find one of the horrid reports that had haunted my dreams most of the night before. Teenage Boy Found Dead or Local Boy Presumed Missing. But nothing stood out among the articles of birth announcements, city budget cuts, and girls’ basketball playoffs. Not even in the obituaries. It was the same on Sunday too.
By Monday my stomach was nauseous from the tightened nerves of my stomach. My mind was utterly useless in my first five periods. Luckily, for my sanity, as I entered the cafeteria for lunch I caught sight of both Ross and Nick almost instantly at a corner table. Finally, I blew out a sigh of relief. Even though I knew I would never see them the same, it was comforting to know they would live another day. At least this way they would have a chance at redemption.
Wait, I thought. My eyes shifted back to notice something strange about the two boys. They weren’t in their usual seats, which was always on either side of Sean at the left corner table, in the back of the cafeteria. In fact, they weren’t even near his table at all. They sat in the front left corner of the room as if they had been shunned from popularity.
What was worse was catchi
ng Ross’s remorseful gaze as I walked toward the lunch line. I couldn’t stand the uncomfortable melancholy that his slumped body held. Nick, on the other hand, couldn’t even find enough courage to look up from his thumbs. Had they shunned themselves from guilt?
I forced my eyes away so that I could grab some tea. My stomach was settling but still against the idea of food. I pursed my lips at the cause of my loss of appetite. The sight of them only brought back memories I hoped to soon forget, and hopefully that would be sooner rather than later.
But if I had felt the nerves at lunch, it was nothing compared to the way the anxiety of walking into English made them jump around. Once I had spotted Liam in his assigned seat I felt a dizzy spin from my stomach. I sat looking at my books, suddenly dissatisfied with the placement of my seat. Why did I have to be next to him?
I looked up at the overhead slides and back at my paper with determination when class began. It was a blessing that today’s notes gave my hands and mind something to do.
I was so anxious to leave when the bell sounded that I elbowed my pens right off my desk with annoyance. Just as my body swiveled, I found myself face to face with Liam. My eyes froze on his as I inhaled with the awareness of the increased pace of my heart. I felt the slight gulp from my throat as a shiver traveled down my arms and into my fingers. Just like the memories of Ross and Nick, seeing Liam had flashed the images of what he had done to them. When I woke this morning I knew how foolish I was to dismiss, or deny, it all, especially after the weekend had left me with nothing but time to relive the night. But maybe it was easier that way. At least until I saw his face to remind me that I was merely lying to myself.
“What are you?”
I was still, watching as he leaned his neck closer. I wasn’t sure where my courage had come from to ask. I certainly had none Friday night.
“A high school student,” he said.
I narrowed my eyes, forgetting that I was even slightly terrified of him. As if I hadn’t been plagued with nightmares over the weekend. As if the slightest unfamiliar sound didn’t make me jump, leaving a trail of goose bumps behind as proof. As if I hadn’t asked Sean, like a child, to come over Saturday and Sunday night. No, right now I was only led by my curiosity.
“I wasn’t under the impression that most high-schoolers could move things with their minds.”
“I didn’t,” he said.
My eyes squinted as I leaned in closer with my whisper. “I saw him floating. It was like magic or something.”
“Did you actually see me doing that?” Liam asked.
“Yes. Well….” I scrunched my lips as I took a minute to remember. He was right. I had never actually seen him lift Nick because I was too shocked to look away.
Liam’s lips were straight as he stood. I followed his movement. “Okay, no I didn’t see you doing it.” He nodded, making it clear that was his point. “But you did move me away from getting hit by the truck. I know that.”
He opened his mouth, ready to speak, but said nothing. In his eyes, I thought I could see, the conflict, the same I had seen before. I didn’t like to see him that way. Finally, he closed his mouth and gathered his books before turning his back to me.
“Thank you,” I said.
It was impulsive but needed.
“For what?” Liam said. His back was still facing me but his neck had turned at my words.
The shock of being so frightened by Liam had overshadowed my gratefulness for his presence Friday night. I watched as he turned back to face me.
“I realized that I never thanked you for what you did. I don’t know what would have happened if you had not been there.”
I looked down with the lie, or maybe it was a realization. It was pretty clear what would have happened if he hadn’t been there. The shame of what felt like stupidity led my eyes to rest on the ground because of this. When I finally let myself look back up at him, I noticed he had moved back to stand at his desk. It was good to know a few students were occupying Mrs. Anderson, keeping her from awkwardly watching our encounter.
Liam leaned in with the gaze of his bright eyes. “If fate were to rewind us to the same moment, I wouldn’t hesitate to be there again.”
My eyes bounced back with his, like a tennis match. Suddenly the fright of what he was had begun to melt. In its place was a warmth of safety. Uh-oh.
I grinned involuntarily. “Can I ask you something?”
He nodded with an approved patience.
“I know what I saw can’t be normal. I mean, I’ve never heard of such a thing in a human.”
“I don’t believe that sentence was a question.”
I tried to resist the roll of my eyes as I walked past the desks, parallel with him. He seemed to keep more with my pace than I did with his as we exited the classroom.
“All right, what are you?” I asked again. He gazed at me like I was an intruder inside a security vault. “I’m not going to tell anyone. I didn’t even tell my brother about what happened, and I tell him everything.”
Really it was more oddly like I couldn’t tell Sean. Part of me was protective of what I had seen. I still didn’t understand that. All I knew was every time I tried, I remained silent. When we stopped at my locker, I watched as Liam’s chin lifted with surprise. He leaned his lips a few inches away from my ear. “I wish that I could say.”
“Can’t you?” I asked.
He leaned back to see my lifted brow.
“I wish for so many things.”
I squinted with confusion, watching him shake his head once before turning to walk down the hall. I was almost certain there was a small grin on his lips. I didn’t know what person would be able to resist the need to solve the mystery of it. He had just silently confessed that what I saw Friday night was true. How was I supposed to ignore that?
I was smiling almost too much, when Sean walked around the corner. He had a narrowed gaze that wasn’t happy but not quite upset either.
“I know,” he said.
My eyebrows lifted with guilt. Had he watched secretly as Liam once again walked me to my locker? I looked toward the ground.
“Why didn’t you tell me about what they did?”
They did? Suddenly my eyes flashed up to meet his gaze. He wasn’t talking about just now, how I had technically broken my own promise to stay away from Liam—a task I thought would be so easy. No, that wasn’t it.
My mouth felt dry as my eyes darted away from him. The image of Ross over me had filtered through my mind again. I was sure that Sean could see my small grimace.
“Tell you what?” I said innocently.
“Emma, please, I can see it written in your eyes as much as I could that night.” It wasn’t an easy thing to relive, and now more than ever I was grateful for Liam. “Em?”
I finally moved my eyes back to meet the patient gaze of his own. I gulped. “How did you even know?”
“They confessed to me this morning.”
I cocked my head back in surprise.
“Why?”
He narrowed his eyes to question my own inquiry.
I shook my head in defense. “I just mean I didn’t think that would be something to confess to you of all people.”
“I wouldn’t say they were exactly willing,” he said. “It was almost like they were overcome by some pint up guilt.”
“Then what made them?”
“Liam Alexander.”
So he did know about Liam, or at least that he had been there. “Really?”
“Well not physically. All he did was walk by us before Nick sudden spit out…”
Sean exhaled with anger with the small shake of his head. It seemed as if Sean couldn’t even the thought of what had happened. I waited for more anxiously but nothing. So it appeared that Sean didn’t know everything about Friday night, just that Liam had been there to rescue me. He knew nothing of how he rescued me.
“So, that’s why they weren’t sitting with you at lunch?”
It all made sense now.
They hadn’t shunned themselves because of the guilt. They had been shunned. I was actually grateful I wasn’t around when they told Sean. They were lucky they were still able to be in the cafeteria at all.
“They won’t ever be sitting at any table that I’m at again.”
I felt guilty about him losing the friendship that had been ongoing for fifteen years. Because of me it had abruptly and permanently ended. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m not.” Though his voice was stern, I could see in his now angered eyes that he was lying. Ross and Nick had grown up with him, and now that bond was broken with betrayal. It would be like Lauren or Erika hatching a plan to kidnap and kill Sean. Though I held a bond with my friends, their act would naturally sever any care I previously held for them. I didn’t want to think about it. “I’m just sorry that I wasn’t there to protect you,” Sean said.
“And that Liam was.” I paused, unsure whether I was saying this as a serious or sarcastic thing. Sean’s gaze had previously been halfway between me and the space in front of him, but I had his full attention now.
“I can’t say that I’m ungrateful, but it doesn’t change how I feel about him. I question why he was even there.”
“Does it matter if he was the one to help?” I said.
Sean only glared to my question. His golden honey eyes almost brightening, with each new second that passed.
“Has your promise changed?”
I sighed. “No.” I wasn’t sure how much I meant that.
On the way home, I was terribly grateful that Sean hadn’t asked for details, details like why, if Liam had saved me, did I come home willing to stay away from him.
Funny how I asked myself the same question as I hopped into bed that night. A question I was made to contemplate once my head hit the pillow and my eyes shut.
Instantly, I found myself surrounded by a forest of trees in a cloud of darkness, but I could see that I wasn’t alone. Liam Alexander stood beside me, looking toward the space directly in front of us.
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