Randi. While she asked Matt about his day, he stole a glance at her. Well, she hadn’t told him to get lost. Maybe she was more forgiving than her sister. Maybe. He needed to talk with her before the evening was through. But if the way she’d looked at him when she first saw him was any clue, he’d already made some headway. And if he succeeded tonight, then everything was up to Jill. Because if she agreed to his plan…God, please let it work!
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“I CAN’T BELIEVE how much that pup’s grown,” Randi said. She stood with Travis on the back porch, watching Matt romp with Ulysses in the yard. It was getting dark and well past Matt’s bedtime, but so what? She couldn’t deny his plea to spend time with Travis and Ulysses after supper.
“Pups have a way of doin’ that,” Travis said quietly. He and Randi still hadn’t talked, yet he was unwilling to disturb this tranquil domestic interlude.
A nearly orange moon had risen over the treetops; he was mesmerized by the way it bathed her delicate features in its mellow light Night sounds had settled around them: the chirp of crickets, muted music from a neighbor’s house, the chink of silver as Jill loaded the dishwasher after insisting they join Matt and leave her to clean up the supper they’d shared.
“‘Course,” he added as they watched Matt make Ulysses obey the commands to sit, stay and come he’d been taught, “it sure would be a shame if that pup’s full-grown before Matt sees him again.” He glanced at her. “Half the joy is watchin’ ‘em grow ‘n’ develop.”
Randi saw the corners of his lips struggle to contain a grin, and she suspected it wasn’t just puppies he was talking about. She released a small sigh. They’d indulged in nothing but small talk since leaving the hospital, and she couldn’t help wondering what else was on his mind. Why had he turned up so suddenly after weeks of silence? What did he want? She was dying to know, yet couldn’t bring herself to ask.
When Travis hadn’t called or come around, she’d been certain it was because she’d driven him away; something had happened between them on that last night they’d spent alone together. She couldn’t recall the details, but she knew that somehow she’d reacted badly. It was the only thing she could think of to explain his abrupt disappearance after saying goodbye to Matt at the hospital.
That disappearance had hurt. So had the empty days that followed, and…
Empty? Simply because there was no Travis? Am I really thinking such a thing?
But it was true. She’d missed him like the devil. Ached with some unfathomable yearning every time she’d heard Matt mention his name. Every time she’d seen that damned card on the refrigerator. Like it or not, Travis McLean had somehow worked his way not only into her son’s heart, but into her own.
How had it happened? More to the point, why did she want him around after all her determination to get rid of him? Of course, after the events of that awful night, Travis had suddenly been transformed in her eyes; she could no longer see him as a threat. How could she when he’d saved them? Proved himself beyond question as a man you could rely on. Trust. Even…care for.
Uneasy with the thought, she reeled it in. If she cared for him, it was because he’d proved himself a friend. A good friend, but that was all. And now, grateful to have him back in their lives, she was loath to say or do anything that might send him away again. Keep it light, Terhune, and let him make the first move.
“You wouldn’t be hinting at something more permanent between Matt and that dog, would you?” she asked archly.
“Well,” Travis drawled, “I did manage to teach Ulysses some manners, and he is housebroken now…”
“I see,” she said, just managing to hold back a smile. “So you were thinking…?”
“So I was wonderin’, Miz Terhune, if you’ve given consideration to a certain proposal I made. The one that prompted me to do all that dog-trainin’?” The grin emerged, full-blown and as engaging as ever.
Lord, the man could charm the birds out of the trees with that grin, and she was certain he knew it. Still, she needn’t make it easy for him. “I have,” was all she said.
“And?” he prompted, trying not to sound impatient.
“Well,” she said, purposely drawing out the word, “I still haven’t spoken to Jill about it, you see, and—”
“I have,” he cut in. “Your sister said it was fine with her, but the decision was yours.” The grin was ear to ear now, and Randi burst out laughing.
“You win, McLean!” She threw up her hands. But when Travis suddenly caught them and gave them a quick squeeze, she felt her heart trip in her chest.
“Wrong,” he said, releasing her hands and flicking her nose playfully with his finger. His eyes found hers, and he smiled to take the edge off his contradiction. “It’s Matt who wins, Randi.”
“Wins what?” Matt demanded breathlessly. They turned, surprised to see him standing beside them, a tailwagging Ulysses at his heels. “What do I win, Travis, huh? C’mon, tell me…puh-leez?”
Joy and laughter and the love of two parents to share it—to share a life with you, if I can manage it, Travis promised silently.
“Uh, I’ll let your mom tell you, Tiger,” he said, glancing at Randi. “And then, since you’ve been real good, how’d you like a piggyback ride up to bed?”
“NOW THERE’S A PICTURE,” Travis murmured as he and Randi stood gazing down at their son half an hour later. Matt was sound asleep, as was Ulysses, curled into a furry mound at his new master’s feet. Watching the angelic smile on Matt’s face, Travis felt his throat constrict. “I swear, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anythin’ more beautiful.”
Randi heard the emotion in his voice and made no protest when he captured her hand and held it gently at his side. It was time to face the truth; she no longer had a single reservation about Travis’s presence in Matt’s life. He really loves him, she reflected silently, loves him and belongs with him.
“I know,” she managed, despite the emotion that threatened to overwhelm her. When had things changed? Again her mind went back to the cottage, to that hellish night. The terrifying drive to the hospital. To the long days when she longed to hear his voice again, and her son never forgot his “friend Travis.” Was that all there was to it? She didn’t know; she only knew that Travis McLean and Matt belonged together, and she was a part of it. And gladder of this than she ever would have imagined.
“Whatcha thinkin’, lady?” Travis’s voice, soft in the quiet room, stole across her thoughts.
“That I’m glad you’re here,” she murmured, “even if it took me a while to…to accept such a thing.”
Using his free hand to tilt up her chin, he met her gaze. Relieved to see not a shadow of doubt there, he smiled. “It doesn’t matter—only that you do now.”
Slowly he lowered his head and brushed her lips with his. “Thanks, Randi.”
“For what? For being sensible enough to admit the truth?” she said, savoring the touch of his lips, wishing the kiss had been longer.
“A lot more than that,” he replied. “Certainly, for allowin’ me to be part of this.” He smiled and gestured to the bed. “But mostly, for trustin’ me with your…with our son.”
“You’ve more than earned that trust,” she whispered. Her pulse accelerated as he raised her hand and pressed a kiss to the knuckles. “I—I’d trust you with Matt’s life.”
She gave a small breathless laugh. “In fact, I already have.”
He was still holding her hand as their gazes met and locked. For several long seconds the silence stretched between them. It was as if the air in the room was charged, pregnant with unnamed emotions each was aware of, yet uncertain how to voice.
“C’mon.” He gave her hand a warm squeeze. “Walk me out to my car.”
She nodded and allowed him to lead her downstairs. They said good-night to Jill, who was off to bed, having an early fitting for her wedding gown in the city. And if Jill noticed her sister’s hand engulfed in Travis’s as they went outside, she said nothing of
it. Her lips, however, curved in a satisfied smile as she climbed the stairs.
Travis paused with Randi before the door of the Alpha; he had yet to release her hand, which he seemed intent on studying as he massaged her knuckles with his thumb.
“You’re awfully quiet,” he said at last, raising his head to meet her eyes. “I was sort of…well, expectin’ a barrage of questions.” At her bemused look he added, “You know—about why I haven’t called or come around all these weeks.”
“Oh. That.” She shrugged. “I figured you had your reasons.” Like the way I drove you off that night on the beach. Because I did—I know I did, even if I can’t remember why.
But you do remember said that voice in her head, startling her with the sudden insight. Even if the details are cloudy, you know. It was because you were afraid!
He gave her a wry smile. “You’re either a lot more forgivin’ than your sister, or you’re not tellin’ me everythin’.”
“My sister? What did…”
“She blistered my ears for not showin’ my face till now, I can tell you,” he said with a chuckle.
She looked horrified. “Jill? But—”
“Shh.” He stilled her lips with his thumb. “Fact is, she had every right to do it.” He shook his head ruefully. “I should’ve called, if only to see how Matt was doin’. ‘Course, I knew when I left the hospital that he was gonna be all right, but…”
He gave a helpless shrug. “I’m not excusin’ my behavior. It’s just that I had some heavy thinkin’ to do, Randi. Real heavy, and I needed some time alone to do it.”
She dropped her gaze. About what’s wrong with me? About why— Oh, God, what if he asks? What if…
“Thinking?” she repeated, throttling the thought.
“Yeah, ‘bout my life. If that doesn’t sound too grandiose or melodramatic,” he added wryly.
Relief washed over her like gentle rain. It hadn’t been about anything she’d done, then. It hadn’t been about her at all!
“Randi,” he said, watching her face carefully, “I’ve decided to go back into medicine. With the intention of becomin’ a pediatrician.”
“What?” If he’d told her he planned to sprout wings and fly, she couldn’t have been more astounded. “How, I mean, when…uh, that is…” She gave up, floored by his announcement. Not to mention the certainty in his eyes and the wide smile on his face.
“I know,” he said, laughing at her dumbfounded look. “I’m as amazed as you, to tell the truth. But I’m also dead sure. As sure I’ve been of anythin’ in my life.”
He went on to tell her then of the things he’d felt the night he’d tended Matt. Of the soul-searching he’d done in its aftermath. And finally of the discussion with Leon, which had solidified his decision.
She listened solemnly. It was an enormous step he was taking, yet she felt in her bones it was the right one. He’d been so obviously in his element that night. She’d worked with many doctors in her time, yet never had she observed one more attuned to the challenge required of him.
True, it had been his own son he’d tended, but that might have made it even more difficult for him—look what had happened to her! Besides, she couldn’t envision Travis doing less for some stranger’s child. He would make a fine physician, she just knew it. And she was touched, actually humbled, that he’d share with her the process involved in his momentous decision.
“So,” he said finally, almost tentatively, when he’d finished, “what do you think?”
“I think,” she said, smiling into his eyes, “that it’s…wonderful.” With the last word she gave a gurgle of laughter and flung her arms around him. “Oh, Travis, I’m so glad for you. You’ll make a terrific pediatrician. The best!”
He felt something ease and slip into place as his arms went around her. He hadn’t realized how important it was to him that she approve. It only served to drive home the other thing that had been nibbling at the edges of his mind. She was important to him. She and Matt, and the life he hungered to share with them.
“I don’t know ‘bout bein’ the best,” he said, keeping his arms about her, but drawing back to look into her eyes, “but I sure plan to give it my best. Thanks, though, for the vote of confidence, Randi.”
She nodded, suddenly unable to speak. She’d launched herself against him without thinking, caught up in her exuberance. Now she could hardly breathe for thinking about the way she felt in his arms. The way he was looking at her as his eyes roamed her face, settling finally on her mouth. The way it would feel if he kissed her. As she’d longed for it, all those many weeks when she feared she’d never see him again.
Travis saw her tongue slide over her lips. It told him what he wondered if she knew herself: that she wanted his mouth on hers. He had all he could do to school himself to resist the hunger he felt. She’s an innocent, McLean, he cautioned as his head slowly lowered, a badly frightened innocent who can’t begin .to know the joy that’s possible between a man and a woman. It’s up to you to show her the way. But slowly, man, slowly…
Randi felt his warm breath fan her face, and she sighed into his mouth before he captured hers in a gentle taking. His lips were warm and pliant as they moved leisurely over hers. Gliding, tasting, they lulled and teased at the same time. Until, without knowing how it happened, she felt her own part, inviting him to explore the interior of her mouth.
Another jolt of desire hit him with this innocent invitation. Beneath those childhood fears was an unconsciously responsive and deeply sensual woman. No wonder he’d never guessed there was anything wrong when he tried to make love to her that night.
Moving his hands to cup her face, he slid his fingers into her hair, deepening the kiss—but slowly, as if he had all the time in the world. He could feel her pulse fluttering against the palms of his hands as he let his tongue trace the silken contours of her lips. His own heart began to hammer when he felt the tip of her tongue graze his. Oh, Randi, darlin’, you make it damned hard for a man to take it slow!
Yet that was what he did. Savoring the taste of her, gently questing, tenderly probing, he let his tongue explore. But ever so slowly, moving with a lazy rhythm that soothed and excited at the same time. Until at last he heard her moan low in her throat and felt her arms slide up and loop about his neck to pull him closer. That’s it, darlin’. Tell me what you want. You’re in charge. You, and nobody else.
Randi wasn’t certain what was happening to her. After those first few moments of anticipation, she’d felt almost dreamy, content with the simple pleasure of his mouth on hers. But something had changed. She found herself impatient, unwilling to be drawn along at this snail’s pace, however pleasurable. She itched for more!
Without another thought, she stood on tiptoe and wound her arms about his neck, pressing her body fully against his. Unaware of the moan that came from her throat, she touched the tip of her tongue to his. And felt the blood singing in her veins as their tongues danced and mated.
Travis heard a roaring in his ears as she communicated her hunger. Stunned by the force of it, he let his hands slide over her shoulders, dropped them to her waist. Locking his arms about her, he pulled her hard against him. Their mouths crossed and crisscrossed, seeking closer union. My God, he wondered, where had this come from? One moment she was shyly accepting his careful kisses, and next thing he knew—
Whoa, McLean! With the self-chastening command, he pulled his mouth from hers, doing his utmost to control his ragged breathing. He planted a kiss on her brow, then cradled her carefully in his arms, making sure their bodies didn’t touch below, betraying his arousal. Damned fool, you nearly lost it. Remember who this is!
“Travis?” she said against his chest in a bewildered voice. “What…what’s wrong?”
“Shh, darlin’,” he whispered into her hair. “Nothin’s wrong.”
“Then why…”
A chuckle vibrated within his chest. “Because you’re too temptin’ by far, sweetheart, ‘n’…let’s just say it�
�s gettin’ late ‘n’ I need to be goin’, okay?”
He pulled away and raised her chin with his knuckles, smiling into her upturned face. “Call you tomorrow?”
Giddy from what had happened, Randi could barely nod as she drank in his features, loving the play of moonlight on his face.
“Night, sugar,” he murmured. “Sleep well.” A brush of his lips over hers, and before she knew it, he was gone.
“Night,” Randi whispered belatedly into the darkness. She touched her fingers to her lips, still tasting him there.
Amazed, she realized she hadn’t wanted the kiss to end. Yet she wondered, as she turned to the house, why, for all its aching sweetness, the thought should provoke a tiny frisson of fear.
TRAVIS SLOWED and turned the Alpha between the massive stone pillars that marked the entrance to Sunnyfields, his family’s Virginia estate. Cruising past the huge oaks lining the drive, he tried to ignore the knot that had formed in his stomach. Tried, but couldn’t. It was the same feeling he’d had as a kid whenever a confrontation with his father loomed. He was a man, many years out from under his father’s roof, yet the meeting he anticipated had the capacity to reduce him to a bundle of childish dread.
Borrowing a trick he’d learned while under pressure in the field for the Agency, he took a deep breath and released it slowly. Then another, repeating the process until he felt the knot begin to unwind. Good. His father was a master at sensing others’ weaknesses and using them to control them; Travis needed to be the one in control if he was to make this reconciliation work.
If the old man didn’t have him thrown off the place before he even got the chance.
“TRAVIS! OH, MY GOD, are you really here?” Judith McLean’s eyes shone with tears as she ran them over her firstborn. “I—I’m not dreamin’, am I?”
“We’re both wide awake, Mother.” Travis bent to embrace her. “Lo, the prodigal son returns!” he added with a chuckle, then lifted her off the floor and whirled her around as she began to laugh and weep at the same time.
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