by Anna del Mar
“Really?” I interrupted. “Because breaking the rules is all you’ve done since the moment you got here.”
“That’s because of you!” she snapped. “You’ve been unreasonable from minute one and predisposed against me even before I got here. I’m no pushover. You of all people should not be arguing against me!”
Was the little vixen trying to blackmail me? I narrowed my eyes on her. Holy hell. She was trying to blackmail me. Me. If you keep this up, her frosty, slated look said, I will tell the director about your secret.
Oh, no. Fuck no. I wasn’t gonna let her have the run of me.
“Go ahead.” I snarled like a cornered animal. “Take your best shot.”
“Director,” she said, eyes turned into green glaciers, furious glare fast on me. “Ari…” She hesitated, choking in her own voice. “There’s something you ought to know…”
“Jade?” I glowered. Was she really capable of doing this? “There’s no scenario in this universe where you’re a scumbag.”
“Matthias!” Ari shot me a reproving glare. “Watch your manners, please. Jade, you were saying?”
“Director, um, Ari,” she started again, fidgeting with her fingers. “There’s something you ought to know.”
She glanced at me. I held my breath, clinging to my gamble that there was a decent human being under all of that defiance and bluster.
“Last night I was afraid that Matthias would exercise his control freak tendencies and take the pictures away from me,” she said evenly. “I emailed the pictures to Hannah in an attempt to protect them. I was going to turn over the originals to Matthias today. I told Hannah what happened, yes, but I expected she would send me the edited video prior to posting it. Something went wrong and she posted on the Mission Protect website and forwarded it to Nat Geo before I could show it to you. She posted it all over social media because that’s how we work. I produce, she promotes. It was a mistake and I’m sorry—no—I’m…heartbroken.”
Her voice cracked and the grief in her eyes hit me like a kick to the nuts. She was telling the truth. And she hadn’t outed me, proving she was all right. It struck me with the force of a jackhammer: She was the complete package.
Slow it down, soldier. I couldn’t afford to put her in more danger than she already was. I was gonna have to put a placeholder in my heart, get Jade out of Africa, and finish my business here before I went after her. Because—assuming that my mission was indeed not just viable, but survivable—I was gonna go after Jade Romo with all I had. I had no doubt about that.
I felt like the lowliest bacteria in the food chain, but there was no way around this. “Pack up,” I said. “You need to go home.”
I hated the misery that dimmed the light in her eyes, but her safety had become the ground zero of my resolutions. This wasn’t only about breaking the rules. This was about Jade getting out of Africa alive.
“Let’s not be hasty,” the director said, shocking the hell out of me. “Perhaps we’d all benefit from giving Jade a second chance.”
I hammered the director with a glare. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“Hear me out, Matthias. There are other developments you’re not aware of.”
“Other developments?” What was I suddenly, the most ignorant grunt in Africa?
“Please, listen to the director,” Zeke put in. “Keep an open mind.”
What the fuck?
“Jade’s report went live only hours ago,” the director said. “It hit all the major cable news networks and social media sites. The online version went viral within two hours. Last I checked, it had millions of views.”
I sunk my teeth into my lower lip. Millions of views?
“Lot of eyes,” Ari continued. “Someone at the foundation in D.C. caught whiff of the trend and setup a GoFundMe account specifically for the research station at Pacha Ziwa. So far, it has raised three million dollars.”
I could not believe my ears. I scrubbed my face with my hands, my calloused fingertips rustling hard against my beard’s stubble. It was a lot of money. Money we desperately needed.
“If the fundraising continues,” the director pointed out unnecessarily, “it could mean some very nice new equipment for the station. It could also mean you could have those additional rangers you’ve been wanting since you got here…”
I realized what the director was saying at the same exact time Jade did.
“No!”
“Yes!” she said over me. “I can follow up with more reports.”
“No way, she can’t stay,” I said. “This is a very bad idea.”
“It could work,” she said. “I know it could work!”
“Too risky,” I said to Ari. “Think about it. Hell, for all we know, Lamba and Kumbuyo are already on the hunt for her. She’s a target now. Africa is lethal to her.”
“I can take care of myself.” Of course the reckless woman would say that. “I want to do this.”
The director looked to me. “Don’t you think that you could keep Jade safe within the boundaries of Pacha Ziwa?”
“Jade, safe? Ha!” I let out a bitter cackle. “Jade’s not safe, period. She’s a loose cannon. She doesn’t follow directions.”
“But your report indicated Jade had military and self-defense skills,” the director said. “You said she assisted in the incident’s resolution last night.”
“One thing doesn’t deny the other.” I stood firm. “Jade needs to go home.”
“Let me stay.” Jade ignored me and focused the intensity of her sparkling gaze on Ari, begging and coaxing at once, an irresistible plea. “I can be an asset. I’ll prove it to you.”
“Ari?” I rumbled between clenched teeth. “Don’t do this…”
“Matthias…” Ari let out a soft sigh and adjusted the silver frame of his small, round glasses before his jet eyes met my glower. “You and I have worked together for two long years. I trust you with the lives of everyone on this reserve, including my own. I’ve supported your work here in every way.” I didn’t miss the stress he put into the word. “But I have to think about the reserve first. I respect your decisions. Will you respect mine?”
“For Christ’s sake.” I cursed under my breath. Ari’s support was vital for my mission. I valued his friendship and counsel as well. “Of course I’ll respect your decision. But don’t tell me I didn’t warn you.”
“Objection noted.” The director returned his attention to Jade. “Suppose I decide to let you stay. Are you willing to abide by the rules at all times, to limit your exposure by going out only on authorized outings, and to stick to situations we designate as safe for you?”
“I’ll follow the rules.” She lifted her right hand as if she were a harmless girl scout and not a proven troublemaker. “I’ll show you that I can be a team player.”
“It’s not in her nature,” I interjected. “The risks are too high.”
“What if I told you that you’d have to work under direct supervision a hundred percent of your time in the field?” the director said. “You cannot work out of the station alone. Will you agree to that?”
“I don’t need to be supervised, but,” she added when she caught the frustration flaring in Ari’s black eyes. “I’ll agree to it, as long as you let me stay.”
“And do you understand that you are on probation and failure to abide by the rules will result in instant removal from the reserve?”
“I do,” she said so earnestly that even the skeptic in me wanted to believe her. “You won’t regret your decision.”
“Oh, come on, Ari.” I rubbed my eyes, trying to stem the massive headache throbbing right behind them. She couldn’t stay and I couldn’t function properly with her around. “Who the hell is gonna supervise her all the time?”
Ari’s stare hammered the last nail in my coffin. “You are.”
Oh, fuck. I was doomed.
8
Jade
Matthias didn’t show up at my bungalow the next morning. Sure, he se
nt maintenance to fix the leaks in my roof, but that wasn’t what I wanted. Somewhere around eight, I got tired of waiting for him. I said good-bye to the black and white colobus monkeys frolicking on my deck, packed my backpack and trekked across the station to the ranger’s camp. It included a cluster of small and large tents raised on wooden platforms around an improvised sports track, a rustic outdoor gym and the stark, concrete block building that served as administrative offices. The camp reminded me of a military field outpost, down to the barbed wire fence and the guards patrolling the perimeter. Yep. I would’ve expected nothing less of Matthias.
The ranger staffing the office informed me that Matthias was out on patrol. Great. He’d left and gone after Kumbuyo without me. I suppressed a surge of anger and returned to the station, silently cursing him for leaving me behind. He was probably still mad at me. Now what?
I made my way to the main lodge, a grand, airy space with a soaring thatched roof and high beams that overlooked the river. The lodge had been lavish in its eco resort days, but in its current reincarnation, it was a utilitarian catch-all space. It housed the kitchen, dining room and lounging area where staff, researchers, and rangers took their meals, got their Wi-Fi, and socialized.
Breakfast was in full swing, but I sneaked into an alcove and set up my laptop in a corner that offered the strongest Wi-Fi connection, put on my headset and placed a video call to Hannah. Her round, freckled face looked like a shifting mosaic on my pixelated screen.
“There you are,” Hannah said in place of a greeting. “I tried calling you several times yesterday. You’re late checking in.”
“Wi-Fi was down,” I lied.
“I know for sure they’ve got a satellite phone at Pacha Ziwa.”
Hannah was always well informed.
“I didn’t want to impose,” I said. “Besides, they’ve got better uses for their satellite phone than you babysitting me.”
“Hogwash.” Hannah scolded me with her brown-eyed gaze. “You’re just doing that thing where you go away and cut everyone out of your life for no reason at all.”
“Oh, please.”
She wasn’t totally wrong. It was hard to explain, but every so often, I needed space, lots of it. I loved Hannah. I loved my true parents. But sometimes, I needed to be away from love, where I didn’t have to love anybody back.
“We agreed you’d check in every other day,” Hannah reminded me. “I expect you to follow through. I don’t need to be frantically looking for you all over Africa. Are we clear?”
“Clear as the Mara River,” I murmured.
“I happen to know the Mara River is a muddy mess.” The sound of a baby crying rose in the background. “Hang on.”
Hannah stepped out of the camera’s range, leaving her chair turning slowly on its axis. When she came back into the frame and sat down, she had squirming four-month-old Rosemary in her arms blaring like a freaking trumpet.
“She’s got lungs of steel.” I winced and grinned at the same time, leaning over my screen to get a better look at the little marvel. “How’s my gorgeous goddaughter doing?”
“As cantankerous as ever.” Hannah unbuttoned her blouse, pushed her bra aside, and put the baby to her breast. “She’s got her godmother’s beastly temper.”
“Excellent, nobody will mess with her.” I laughed as the baby latched down on Hannah’s engorged boob. “By the looks of it, she’s got my appetite as well.”
“Voracious,” Hannah agreed, flinching.
The sight of my friend nursing her baby softened my heart. It was a wonder to watch Hannah, the tough, no-nonsense badass she’d once been, interacting so tenderly with her kid. It was even more amazing when I considered how terribly Hannah had been injured—torn to pieces—and how difficult her recovery had been. There had been so many times when I’d wondered if she would survive, if she would recover and have a “normal” life.
And then Ian had come around, swept her off her prosthetic feet, and loved her like Hannah deserved, with the power and passion of a smitten warrior. He’d loved her when she’d thought of herself as broken and unlovable, and he’d stood by her through the good, the bad, and the ugly. To top all of that, he’d given her little Ian and Rosemary. I’d witnessed firsthand how he’d given Hannah the one thing she thought she’d lost in the explosion: a future.
I loved Ian for loving Hannah and I loved Hannah for teaching me resilience. She’d found the peace that eluded me and I was thrilled for her.
“What’s this you mentioned in your email about breaking another body cam?” Hannah’s face scrunched in a scowl. “Should I start buying body cams by the dozen?”
“Only if you get a bulk discount.”
“Your parents wanted to know how you broke it.”
Oh, shit. “Did you tell them?”
“No way.” Hannah hugged the baby to her breast. “I like your parents. No need to tell them you got way too close to a son of a bitch wanted for crimes against humanity.”
I puffed. “Did you want the pictures or not?”
“Not at the expense of your freaking life!”
“Get off your high horse, girl. I’m fine and I got the job done. Plus, I packed a backup body cam as always. You can’t even imagine the kind of shit you got me in by placing my report all over the net and the news. I almost got thrown out of here before I began.”
“Right.” She poked a prosthetic finger at me. “I don’t believe for a second you wanted me to hold back on posting those pictures. You would’ve wanted that stuff public ASAP.”
She was so damn right.
“The ratings are going through the roof,” Hannah said. “Traffic on Mission Protect’s website has spiked, Nat Geo wants more, and the Pacha Ziwa foundation is set on keeping the fund raising momentum.”
“I’m trying over here,” I said. “But there’s some pushback, a tad of an inconvenience.”
Hannah raised her eyebrows. “What’s his name?”
“Why do you have to go all ninja on me and assume it’s a ‘he’?”
“’Cause if you’re gonna have an issue, that issue is gonna have a dick.”
“Shut up.” I looked over my shoulder and lowered my voice. “You know I gave up dicks a while back.”
“Total waste of time, if you ask me.”
“Hannah!”
“What?” She deftly shifted the baby from one breast to the other. “I’ve told you before. One asshole doesn’t mean the whole species stinks.”
“One asshole?” I scoffed. “It’s more like a collection.”
“Whatever,” Hannah said. “Billy wasn’t so bad and I liked Jorge.”
“Billy was an idiot and Jorge’s IQ topped at ten. In any case, I didn’t call you to chat about my sex life.”
“Oh, goody, because if you had, there’d be nothing to talk about.”
Point made.
“So I’ll ask again,” Hannah said. “What’s this inconvenience’s name?”
“Matthias Hawking.”
“The reserve’s game warden?”
“The one and only.”
She gave me a hard stare. “Really, Jade?”
“It’s not my fault,” I said. “He’s not entirely reasonable.”
“How about you?” Hannah quirked her mouth. “Are you being reasonable? Because I know you. You’ve got some serious issues with authority figures.”
“I made it through the Marines, didn’t I?”
“Yeah,” Hannah said, “but only because of my good influence.”
That was a little true. Okay, a lot true.
“Mommeeeeee!” Little Ian’s voice screeched in the background, piercing my eardrums.
Hannah let out a weary sigh. “Break’s over. Got to go do mommy duty.”
“Are you running out of mommy juice?” I teased. “Or maybe you want to be in Africa, with me?”
“Yeah, I’m tired all the time, and I do want to be in Africa with you, at least a little, but…” She flashed the smile I thought I’d ne
ver see again on the day I fished out her hand from a pool of blood, still clutching her weapon. “I’m good, Jade. No, I’m great. I wish I could explain. I wish you had what I have.”
“Me? Husband? Kids? Ha!” I laughed. “Now you’re talking crazy talk. I like your kids. On loan. They’re cool, but at the end of the day, they go back where they came from. Plus, you won’t let me screw them up. Ideal.”
“Maybe you’re not ready yet.” Hannah leaned into the screen and looked me in the eye. “But some day, you will. In the meanwhile, get your act together, and don’t be a bitch to the game warden, okay? We’re not going to get this done if you piss him off.”
“Too late.”
Hannah groaned. “And to think I worked so hard to get you into Pacha Ziwa.”
“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’ll fix it.”
“Yeah, right, because you excel at diplomacy.” Hannah shook her head. “Maybe I should call the guy, smooth things out.”
“That won’t be necessary,” I said. “I can handle it.”
“You sure?”
“Consider the mission accomplished.”
“Mommeeee!”
“Got to go.” Hannah removed the baby from her breast, snapped her bra and T-shirt in place, and cradled Rosemary over her shoulder. “Report in as scheduled. Make peace with the game warden and establish a professional relationship with him. And call your parents. You know they worry when you go on assignment.”
“Yeah, yeah.” I grinned. “Have I told you lately that you sound like an old lady?”
“At least I’m a happy old lady, instead of a pissed off broad, like you.”
“Go do the active duty mommy thing and let me be.”
“I’ll do that,” Hannah said. “But Jade?”
“What?”
“Be careful.”
I loaded my tray with a huge mug of coffee, a plateful of scrambled eggs, and a banana. I took a deep breath before I turned around and faced the dining room. My stomach squeezed with a pang of dread as my gaze roamed over the people having their breakfast on the terrace. My hands tightened around the tray.
A flashback of me at age seven in the school cafeteria hit me without warning. I saw the skinny, tall, disheveled little girl I’d been, dressed in clothes that bordered on rags, and worn down shoes. The same fears that had plagued my school days pummeled me now. Twenty-five years later, I could almost hear the other children’s voices, whispering behind my back.