"You...you. You're a...you're a..." I can't even say it and trail off as terror seizes my heart in a savage grip.
His ice-blue eyes look so human right now, shifting between worry and regret. "A werewolf." He supplies the word that I can't manage to spit out.
I whimper in fear and press back even farther into my seat, gripping Luna tightly in my arms as I start to tremble. I glance toward the passenger-side door, contemplating crawling into the front seat and trying to gauge if I'd survive jumping out of the Jeep right now.
"I would never hurt you, Raven," he says in a pained and quavering voice. "Please believe me. I couldn't. You're my-" He cuts himself off and snaps his mouth shut as his hands clench tighter around the wheel.
"I'm your what?" I ask, my voice wavering with fear. Victim? Prey? His next meal?
"I didn't mean for you to find out this way," he says instead, diverting my question. "I hate scaring you." His voice is thick, his eyes unexpectedly gleaming with unshed tears. "I'm sorry," he adds in a pained rasp.
Luna abruptly rises from my lap and worms her way up to the front seat. She snuggles up to Emmett, licking and nuzzling his face and neck as she comforts him like she's done for me so many times over the years. I watch him wordlessly accept Luna's ministrations, this time not even attempting to push her away as he buries his hand in her ruff and continues driving.
I'm confused and scared and so overwhelmed. I lift my feet onto the bench seat and hug my legs to my still trembling body. I start to rock back and forth, sobbing brokenly with my forehead pressed to my knees. I feel the Jeep lurch to the right and come to an abrupt stop. A second later, gentle fingers touch my wrist, and a zing of awareness flies up my arm and makes my heart flutter happily in my chest.
I look up to find him twisted in his seat to face me, his expression anguished. I have a sudden urge to reach up and touch his face, to comfort him. But the image of his eyes burning silver and his face warping into a monster fill my mind. I remember the grisly deaths he meted out and the blood spattered across his face and bare chest after he changed back. Even though he must have cleaned the blood off himself and put on fresh clothes, I can't stop seeing it in my head. I bury my face against my knees again with a whimper of fear and scoot across the seat away from his touch.
"Raven," he says in an agonized voice. He sighs when I don't respond and continue sobbing softly. "Please...I swear to you on my life that you have nothing to fear from me."
I finally lift my eyes to his and shake my head vehemently. "But you're a monster. A monster just like them." I fling that last word at him with harsh vitriol.
His face hardens and does nothing to ease my fear as a low growl rumbles up out of his chest. Silver glimmers in his eyes for a fleeting moment.
"I am nothing like those murderous disgusting things," he snarls out fiercely. "And I'll kill every last fucking one of them who comes anywhere near you again and feel no remorse."
I jerk back from his bitter vehemence and whimper softly. He notices with a pained expression, then immediately closes his eyes and takes in a slow deep breath. He lets it out with a full body shudder. When he opens his eyes again, they're his normal ice-blue and his demeanor is calm once more.
"I would give my last dying breath to protect you, to keep you safe," he says with unwavering conviction. "Believe me, you have nothing to fear from me. The wolf in me is no more a monster than the man you've gotten to know tonight." He reaches a hand out toward me, and I stare at it in trepidation. "Trust me, please," he whispers pleadingly as he unwaveringly holds my gaze.
"I...I want to, but...but," -a sob wrenches up out of my chest- "I...I don't know what's going on. I don't understand any of this." I feel tears sheeting down my face as more sobs break free.
"Shh, baby," he soothes, still not touching me. "I promise I'll tell you everything. Just let me take you home where it's safe first. Okay?"
I hold his gaze for a long and poignant moment, seeing nothing but sincerity and honest concern in his very human looking eyes. I feel an inexorable pull toward him in my heart, in my very soul, that I can't deny. And even though it would make far more sense to run as far and as quickly as I can away from Emmett after everything I saw tonight, I nod in agreement instead.
14
EMMETT
My emotions are all over the place and my body weary from shifting two times in such close succession. It's something I usually avoid for that reason. And knowing that I frightened Raven so badly, and made her cry, is even harder on me. One second I'm livid at myself for losing control like I did, the next I'm filled with remorse that makes my eyes burn with tears. And it's all underscored by this visceral need to comfort Raven, to hold her and touch her when I know that's not what she wants or needs right now. My head and heart feel wrung out, and I still have to explain everything to her. Fuck me. I'm terrified of making things worse. It's a distinct possibility since I feel like I just keep fucking this up at every turn so far.
I spare a quick glance at the backseat again. I find her huddled on the passenger side as far away from me as she can get with Luna curled up against her hip. She stares out the window into the darkness outside with a mournful expression that wrecks me. I want her to smile, to be happy like she was tonight at the fair when I held her hand, and we talked for hours. I want her to be easy and carefree, to open up to me again, like I did so easily with her. I want to go back before I fucked up and probably ruined this thing between us before it could even begin. Seeing her pulling away from me right now has a dull ache throbbing in my chest and my eyes stinging again. They're sensations that I am not accustomed to at all or the feelings causing them.
Even though I know it's normal for this situation, I think it's insane for me to feel so deeply for her after just one day, but I can't deny it. It was like love at first sight on steroids, and I didn't stand a chance against it. I wasn't lying when I said I'd give my last dying breath for her. I would sacrifice myself in a heartbeat. And why? Because I'm in love with her, both the man and the wolf in me. She's my mate. It just took the man a little longer to admit it than the animal, who's more emotional and instinct driven.
I spy Raven's little house up ahead on the right and tense instantly in apprehension. I've never told a human about what I am before. I never had to explain it to anyone. I always just knew it was a secret to keep at all costs, knew that the world was more than it seemed, and that the supernatural was very real. Now I have to explain the inexplicable, and I don't even know where to start.
I pull into the driveway and stop behind her little gray Ford Ranger. I open the door and get out of my Jeep, then turn back to lean the seat forward so Raven can get out. Luna immediately comes to me with her butt wiggling happily. I pick her up in my arms, and her tongue goes to town on my face as I set her on her feet on the driveway. I straighten and reach a hand toward Raven, but she ignores it without even meeting my eyes and climbs out of the Jeep on her own. Her rejection stings more than I care to admit.
I step out of her way, then wordlessly follow her up the driveway as I run a hand nervously through my hair. I watch her hunched form shuffle toward the house, her entire demeanor changed from the happily excited girl I picked up here just a few hours ago. She climbs the four steps of the deck that forms the house's front porch. Then she approaches the door with her keys out, but pauses for a long beat before finally turning to face me.
"Um," she says as her eyes dart everywhere but at me. "Why don't we just sit out here." She motions toward two wrought-iron chairs flanking a small matching table on the porch nearby.
I feel a sudden stab of pain in my chest when I realize that she wants to sit out here because she doesn't want me in her house. She's still afraid of me. Though I don't blame her after what she witnessed tonight, that fact makes me feel like shit.
I nod in agreement, not trusting that my voice won't give my hurt away, and follow her over to the two chairs. We take a seat as Luna curls up at Raven's feet, and I push the pain down
as I try to gather my thoughts. I stare off into the night for several long moments as I rub a hand over the itching wound across my upper chest.
Her eyes drift over to my chest and widen. "You're hurt," she says in a worried tone.
I glance down at the front of the clean shirt I got from the bag full of clothes I always keep in my Jeep. A thin line of blood is soaked into it. "It's just a scratch. I'll be fine," I reassure her, before she glances away.
Finally, after another long moment of uncomfortable silence passes, Raven asks tentatively, "Were you...were you bitten?"
"What?" I ask in confusion.
"Did...did a werewolf bite you?" she asks. "Were you cursed or something?"
I snort out a laugh without meaning to, and it earns me a harsh glare that doesn't bother me. I'm just relieved that she's looking at me again.
"No," I say. "I was born a werewolf."
"Oh," she responds quietly.
"But those two that attacked me tonight weren't born that way." I glance at her bewildered expression and take my opportunity to explain. "There are two kinds of werewolves, the trueborn ones like me and my pack, and those who become what they are through black magic."
"Black magic?" she blurts out in disbelief.
I nod. "They make a pact with a demon that costs them their soul and humanity in exchange for superhuman power and the ability to shift into a half-wolf monster. We call them demonborn, and they're an abomination to what a trueborn werewolf is."
"So those men last night," she adds in a wavering tone. "They were...they were..."
"They were demonborn too," I finish for her.
"How is any of this even real?" she asks with a shake of her head as a deep furrow creases her brow.
I see fear still swirling around in her gorgeous eyes, and I feel bad for her. I can't imagine finding out all of this after believing it was all just fantasies and stories my whole life.
"There's a lot more going on in this world than most people ever see or could handle if they did," I tell her. "I think it's better and safer for everyone if most people never know the truth."
I can see in her eyes that she wishes she didn't know the truth either. It makes me think that I'm losing her even more with each passing moment. The realization sits like a lead weight in my gut. I fight yet another sudden urge to gather her up in my arms and never let her go.
"I can't tell my dad, can I?" she asks dejectedly.
"No." I shake my head, grateful that her father works the night shift and isn't home. "My family and my pack's lives depend on our existence staying a secret, as do yours and your father's. The fewer who know the better."
She snorts out a bitter laugh, then adds under her breath, "That, and he'd have me committed."
I expect her to ask more questions about werewolves, but her next question surprises me and veers this conversation in a direction I'm not ready for.
"Why were those...those demonborn so interested in me?" she asks with a frown. "It's not like I was the only woman in Rowdy's Tavern last night or at the fair tonight. Why was I singled out? Why come after me?"
I grow still as she steers the subject into territory that she may not be able to handle, that I may not be able to handle if she can't. I avert my eyes from hers and sit there in tense silence. It stretches far too long as I try to figure out how to tell her without freaking her out.
"What aren't you telling me?" she asks sharply, and I look over to see that her gaze has hardened with suspicion.
I sigh deeply. I've kept enough from her already that her trust is dwindling fast, and I owe her honesty and transparency in this.
"They can smell what you are," I explain.
She stares at me in stunned confusion.
"If they can get close enough, they can scent the werewolf blood you carry in your veins."
"Wait...what?" she blurts out as she jerks back into her chair.
"Someone from both sides of your family passed werewolf blood on to you," I tell her.
"No," she responds vehemently. "That's not right. It's impossible."
"I can smell it on you too," I say carefully. "A person doesn't have to be a werewolf to carry it or pass it on. You're what's called a wild blood, and it's very rare. You carry the blood of a trueborn from both sides of your family, but you can't shift. It's even rarer than when a trueborn werewolf is born."
She sits there with a shell-shocked expression as she shakes her head vigorously in denial. "No, that can't be right."
"How well do you know both sides of your family?"
"I...I..." -she blinks rapidly and takes a shuddering breath- "I don't. I was adopted."
I don't say a word as I let her process this revelation for several long moments as she stares off in the distance. Finally, she looks at me with a worried frown.
"That still doesn't explain why they were after me."
"The demonborn have a theory that breeding with a wild blood human will strengthen their kind and make them a match for a trueborn."
She meets my gaze with a horrified expression. "You...you mean they wanted to...wanted to...rape me?" Her voice is ragged and fearful.
I nod and reach a hand out toward her, but she ignores it and shrinks away from me infinitesimally. I drop my hand as a burst of pain lances my heart. I'm losing her.
"But...but why?" she asks quietly as she shakes her head slowly. "Why would they think doing...doing that would work?"
"A mating between a werewolf and a wild blood always breeds true," I explain in a rough voice as I try to smother my despair. "They're no match for a trueborn, but they are for a human, so..." I trail off meaningfully.
"So they came after me since I'm an easy target," Raven finishes in a wavering voice as she stares off straight ahead with a horrified expression.
"Yeah," I whisper, then just sit there watching Raven process everything I told her with a frown and a furrowed brow.
I fight the urge to pull her into my arms and settle her on my lap where I can hold her. Arousal starts to ignite inside me, and I long to soothe all her troubles and worries away with my body. I clench my hands into fists as I shove it down. Now is not the time. A few minutes pass until Raven suddenly gasps and whips her head toward me with a harsh glare.
"Is that why you're after me too?" she asks in an accusatory tone that catches me completely off guard. "Why you kissed me and asked me out?"
"What?!" I blurt out with a startled jerk as her electric blue eyes bore into me with malice.
She shoots to her feet and points at me as she practically snarls out, "You're trying to seduce me so you can get me pregnant, aren't you?" Luna leaps up too, and presses against Raven's leg and starts whining frantically as she looks up at her master.
"No," I blurt out instantly as I rise from my chair. "That's not what this is at all. You're my...you're my..." I don't want to say it since I fear it will only frighten her away completely.
"I'm your what?" she says in an agitated voice as she backs away from me. "Your conquest, your werewolf broodmare?"
"No," I say again with vehemence. "I'm not trying to seduce you or use you for anything, Raven." I sink down to my knees in front of her as a torrent of desperate words pour out of me. "Don't you feel it? This pull between us...this bond? We're supposed to be together. You're my mate. And I know it sounds crazy, but I love you."
I know I fucked up and went too far again when she staggers back a step with wide startled eyes.
"You're insane," she raggedly whispers.
I can smell the sharp tang of her fear, hear her heart pounding away with it, and it kills me. "Raven..." I whisper as my chest seizes in pain.
She shakes her head. "You need to go."
"Please," I say, emasculating myself for one final plea. But her face shutters, shutting me out completely and destroying what little hope I held onto.
"You need to leave now," she says fiercely, the harsh finality in her words sucking the life out of me.
I bow my head as my bod
y deflates in resignation. I don't even react when Luna approaches, places her little paws on my chest, and begins licking my face to comfort me. I can't make Raven want me. I can't make her feel something for me that she doesn't, no matter how I feel about her. Everything my parents said about the mating bond seems like a fantasy that I stupidly bought into and believed. Then I transferred it onto Raven, thinking it was real. A pit of empty blackness opens up inside me, and I know that I was wrong about this, about us. This isn't the beginning of anything. It's the end.
I rise wordlessly to my feet and turn to leave, ignoring the pull I still feel toward her. I now know it's a lie I constructed in my own head. I trudge to my Jeep and get in, then start the vehicle and back out onto the road. I drive away without looking back at Raven once, knowing it will just destroy me if I do.
The trip home is a mindless blur. By the time I pull into the gravel driveway of my small cabin, I don't even remember how I got there. I climb out in a daze and instead of heading for my cabin's front door, I move toward the trees behind my home. I leave a haphazard trail of clothes strewn across the grass in my wake, then shift as I breach the tree line. I surrender my humanity completely to the wolf, and melt into the comforting embrace of the forest with a long and mournful howl of loss and despair.
15
RAVEN
In my dream, the wolf is there, hovering just out of sight and taunting the edges of my vision. Glowing silver eyes track my every move as the beast follows me through fog-shrouded darkness, but I'm not afraid of him. Strangely, his presence makes me feel safe and secure, when I should feel anything but that as I wander aimlessly through the shadows.
Suddenly, frightening red eyes start to pierce the darkness and rush toward me from all sides, and I freeze in terror. My fear is short lived though as the silver eyes whirl in a circle around me, stopping them all with vicious menacing snarls that send them fleeing back into the blackness each time they come for me.
Wild Blood: The Trueborn Saga Book 1 Page 10