by C. A. Harms
Torn by Love
(Scarred by Love Series Book 4)
By C.A. Harms
Torn by Love
Copyright © 2015 by C.A. Harms.
All rights reserved.
First Print Edition: July 2015
Limitless Publishing, LLC
Kailua, HI 96734
www.limitlesspublishing.com
Formatting: Limitless Publishing
ISBN-13: 978-1-68058-210-9
ISBN-10: 1-68058-210-0
No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.
Dedication
Having a strong person to lean on,
only makes you stronger in the end.
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Epilogue
Prologue
Lily
I couldn’t get the key in the lock. My hands were overflowing with grocery bags, and the rain was coming down heavily. Blinking rapidly to clear the raindrops from my eyelashes, I squinted. Who thought it was a bright idea to stop at the store in this weather? Oh yeah, that would be me.
Logan was due home later tonight from his most recent business trip, and I thought I would make him dinner. He had been living in a hotel for the last week, eating takeout food. A nice home-cooked meal would be a welcomed change, I was sure.
I turned the knob and rushed into our apartment. Stumbling just as I stepped inside, I dropped one of the bags. The jar of spaghetti sauce hit the floor hard and rolled toward the center of the room.
I put the bags down and turned to close the door behind me. A scream tore through my throat at the sight of the dark figure standing only a few feet away.
I stepped backward, tripping over the bags I had left in the middle of the floor. I attempted to brace myself but landed hard on the floor. I cried out on impact, a pain shooting through my wrist as I tucked it against my body, attempting to protect it from further injury.
As I looked back up at the open door, my eyes filled with tears. Randy was standing a few feet closer now, scowling as he peered down at me.
“No one is here to save you now, Lily. No friends to hide you, to stand guard over you.” His lip lifted at the corner in a sadistic manner as he stepped closer. “You’re all mine,” he snarled.
I immediately crawled backward in a hurry, my wrist aching each time I placed my palm on the floor.
“There’s nowhere to go. You should just give up now. It’s a pointless fight.” Randy’s chuckle rang out through the quiet apartment.
If I could just get to the bedroom at the end of the hallway, I could lock the door and call for help. A sob escaped me as I looked at the floor near his feet. My phone sat in the bag just behind him. I had no hope of reaching it.
Taking in a deep breath, I pushed up off the floor and ran down the hall as fast as I could. Slamming the bedroom door behind me, I then used all my strength to slide the dresser in front of it.
Once I had the window unlocked, I pushed the screen out. As it fell to the ground with a clatter, I leaned out and measured the distance to the pavement. Our apartment was built on a slope, and the drop was at least fifteen feet.
A loud thump caught my attention. I looked toward the door, which was banging against the dresser and pushing it away little by little.
A sense of panic boiled in my stomach as I lifted my leg and placed it over the ledge, trying my best to hurry without tumbling to the ground. Just as I began to lower myself out of the window, with my feet dangling as I hung over the windowsill, my shoulders were gripped from above.
I screamed out, kicking my legs and trying to break out of the hold.
“Lily.”
Tears clouded my vision. I had to get away. Just a little farther and I would be free of the plan he had for me.
“Lily, goddamn it, wake up.”
The shaking became more intense as I heard Logan’s voice in the distance. “I’m here, Lil, wake up.”
My eyes shot open, and I reared up off the mattress, scrambling toward the headboard while looking around the darkened room in panic.
Logan’s concerned face came into view, and all at once everything came back to me.
Lately the nightmares have been bad. Randy had been served with the restraining order, and I’d only had to see him one time since that night he followed me to Bree’s. I’d had to go back to court last week to extend the order of protection. Seeing his face as he glared at me with such hate brought back both the fear he had instilled in me and my nightmares with a vengeance.
Chapter One
Lily
“Rough night?” Logan asked as I took a seat on the other side of the snack bar. All I could offer was a subtle nod. My head was pounding, and I felt as if I barely had the energy to move. “Wanna talk about it?”
Propping my head up on one hand, I yawned. “Mm, not really. I mean it’s the same thing as always. It’s been a while since I last had one.”
“I’m sure it didn’t help seeing him in court last week. I hated not being here to go with you.”
Logan’s a flight attendant and rarely stays home for more than a couple days at a time. It got lonely without him here, and if I was being honest with myself, it was also kind of scary.
“I understand, really.” I gave him the most reassuring smile I could offer. The last thing I wanted was for Logan to feel bad about doing what he loved. I couldn’t expect him or anyone else to put their lives on hold to babysit me.
He came around the end of the counter and sat on the empty stool next to me. “I’m thinking that you staying here alone isn’t such a good idea anymore.”
“Oh yeah? Well what do you suggest I do about that?” I asked.
He wiggled his eyebrows in a suggestive manner. “There’s always the protection of that cute cop you’re dating. Or the Parks hunk that we all know has a thing for ya.” He bumped his shoulder against mine, and I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped me.
“Yeah, Tanner has a thing for everyone with a vagina. So that means very little.” Just the mention of Tanner gave me a rush. “Shawn and I just started dating, I’m not going to invite him to stay with me. I’ll be fine.”
Logan would be leaving tomorrow morning for four days, and I refused to play the scared victim that neede
d protection. I would be okay. I just had to shake this fear and move on from it.
***
Bree and I had made plans for a late breakfast. After a quick shower and a skim through my tiny closet, I settled on a pale blue dress. Slipping on a pair of sandals, I sent Bree a text letting her know I was on my way.
Every time I went to Bree’s apartment, I felt out of place. Tanner’s presence made me so nervous. It wasn’t fair how much he could excite me with just one smoldering stare. Those eyes of his made my mind run wild. As I walked up to the door, I repeated Shawn’s name in my mind. It was wrong to think of Tanner when I was dating Shawn. Tanner was a mess and a player. I had to stay clear of him.
I held my breath as I knocked, silently begging for anyone but him to answer.
I heard a loud squeal as the door flew open, and Paisley came running out. “Lily, help.” She laughed as she hid behind me and wrapped herself around my legs.
As I leaned sideways to get a better look at her, her eyes widened and a loud shrill of a scream rushed from her as she squeezed my legs tighter. I spun back around to see what she was trying her best to get away from.
Tanner stood in the doorway, wearing a bright smile. The dimple on his left cheek drew my attention. Why did he have to look so innocent when we all knew he was anything but? He was shirtless, and a faded pair of jeans hung low on his narrow waist. A small patch of dark hair was gathered just at the top.
My gaze appreciatively roamed over his abs before taking in his muscular chest, broad shoulders, and full, thick arms. His throat bobbed as he swallowed, and my vision locked with his. My cheeks grew hot with the knowledge that he had just caught me checking him out. A knowing smile spread out over his lips.
“Um, I, uh,” I stuttered. “I’m here to pick up Bree.” I forced out the words, still feeling a little overheated.
He took a step closer, still saying nothing. His chest was now just inches from me. If I leaned forward, the stubble along his jawline would touch my cheek. I took in a deep breath. He must have showered recently; the manly scent of his body wash filled my nostrils. I remembered it from when I stayed here with them. Yes, okay, I secretly showered with it while I was here those few days. I loved the smell of him. Call me crazy or obsessed, whatever, but it was an amazing scent.
His arms encircled my waist, and I held my breath, afraid to move. I closed my eyes, and just as my body was about to lean into him, he pulled Paisley from behind me. She squealed with laughter again as he tossed her up over his shoulder and turned toward the apartment.
“You coming?” he asked as he looked back over his shoulder and flashed me that sexy dimple once again. “Bree and Max are upstairs. It could be a while.” He winked and walked off with a kicking, giggling Paisley.
Pull it together, Lily. Drool much?
Chapter Two
Tanner
“So what’ll it be, kid? Cheerios, Rice Krispies, or oatmeal?” I asked Paisley as I stood with my back to her and Lily. I was doing everything I could not to look at Lily, but the damn dress she had on wasn’t helping me at all, and getting turned on in Paisley’s presence wasn’t a good idea.
“I want your cereal. The chocolate kind,” she stated.
I hung my head and laughed. Looking back at her, I tried not to focus on Lily’s chest. Her dress was cut entirely too low. “Shh, your sister doesn’t know I still have that. She told me I wasn’t allowed to buy it again after you and I ate the entire box in one sitting.” Paisley smiled brightly and I heard Lily giggle. “What?” I asked. “Okay, okay, so we ate a bag of M&M’s and half a box of caramels too.”
“Yeah, I can’t imagine why Bree would have a problem with that,” Lily replied.
I reached into the cabinet above the refrigerator and was just about to pull out the Cocoa Krispies when I heard Bree’s voice behind me. “Don’t even think about it.”
Lily laughed once again, and I heard Max chuckling too. Bree poked my side, and I spun around to face her. Very few people knew about my weak spot; I was ticklish on my sides more than I would ever admit.
“No cereal, Princess,” Max announced as he picked Paisley up. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. “We’re going over to Grandma Ray’s. She made French toast.”
It was still crazy to see Max being a daddy. He was always so determined to stay unattached. Now things were completely the opposite. Bree and Paisley were his world, his girls, and everyone knew it.
He walked up to Bree still holding Paisley close and leaned forward to kiss her. A soft moan fell from her lips as he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closer.
My gaze shifted to Lily as she watched the exchange with a deep longing evident in her eyes.
“Hey, Lil, how are things going with that cop you’re seeing? What’s his name again?” Max of course took the opportunity to bring up the fucker that was smarter than me. After all, he was the guy that had the balls to go after something he wanted. I went about getting breakfast with my back to them as they continued talking about something I had no desire to hear about.
“Good, I guess,” she answered. “We’ve gone out a few times. His shift got changed to evenings, so it makes getting together hard. We’re going out to dinner tomorrow night.”
I slammed down the bowl I was holding and spun around. Max looked at me with a cocky grin, stupid fucker. Bree and Lily both looked surprised, and Paisley was scowling at me.
“Tanner, that was my Frozen bowl,” she said.
I looked back to the sink to make sure her favorite bowl wasn’t broken. “Sorry, kid.” It was still in one piece, and I was thankful for that. She could throw one hell of a fit when she wanted to, and I wasn’t in the mood for one of those. “It slipped,” I stated, glaring back at Max. He chuckled again, and if I thought I could take him, I would have decked him right then.
“Well, uh, we better get going,” Bree said, trying to break the obvious tension in the air.
Lily caught my attention as she slid from the stool and grabbed her bag from the countertop. “Yeah, okay,” she said. Her demeanor had changed. She didn’t seem to know what to say.
I turned around and leaned back against the counter, crossing my arms over my chest. Our eyes focused on each other for a few seconds before she quickly averted her stare. I watched as she followed Bree out of the room, and I instantly felt the loss of her presence.
“You’re still dragging your feet, little brother,” Max said. “You’ll be sorry if you keep waiting for her to make the first move. Shawn’s moving in fast. Carson says she’s all he talks about. They’re getting closer, and you’re wasting time.”
Max was pissing me off. If Paisley wasn’t still clinging to his neck, I would tell him how I really felt about his meddling. Instead I narrowed my eyes and pushed off from the counter behind me. “Don’t need your help. I’m fine with the way things are.”
I was halfway up the steps when he hollered after me. “Keep lying to yourself, T. I know you. You need to just man up and admit you’ve got a thing for Lily.”
He was right, but the last thing I would do was let him know that.
Chapter Three
Lily
“Hey, gorgeous,” Shawn said as he leaned in and kissed my cheek. “You ready?”
I nodded as I pulled the door shut behind me. He rested his hand on my lower back and led me to his car.
We were going to a steakhouse just at the edge of town. I was looking forward to a night out. Logan left this morning, and being home alone was just a little unnerving. I really needed to stop being paranoid. Maybe a night out would help. Shawn had the ability to make me laugh. He was so sweet and the complete opposite of Tanner. The intense feeling I had in Tanner’s presence was overwhelming. He was always so hard to figure out. Shawn, on the other hand, was laid-back and almost predictable. I really had a great time with him. It was comfortable.
“I was thinking we could maybe go over to Richard’s after this. Have a drink, listen to the
band. What do you think?” Shawn asked as he placed his hand over mine and flirtatiously toyed with my fingers.
He was handsome in that boyish kind of way. I smiled back at his hopeful stare. “Okay, sure.”
***
The moment we entered the bar, the hairs on the back of my neck stood. Tanner’s eyes locked with mine, and I could sense his anger. I offered him a smile before allowing Shawn to lead me to a table in the back.
Shawn himself appeared slightly nervous, yet it was directed to the opposite side of the bar. He continued to look in that direction, his arm propped up, hiding his face. I was just about to ask him if everything was okay when the chair scraped across the floor.
I turned almost too quickly, and my eyes locked with a pair of green eyes that made my stomach drop.
“Hey, Lil, how’s your date going?” Tanner asked, his eyes never leaving mine. He stared at me as if I had done something terrible. I really didn’t understand what his problem was.
“Can you excuse me for a minute? I’m gonna run up to the bar and order our drinks,” Shawn said as he stood from the table. I could only nod as he hurried away.
“What are you doing with him?” Tanner asked, his voice slightly slurred. I quickly turned around to him, wondering what he could mean. He stared back at me, his gaze shifting from my eyes to my lips. “I waited too long,” he whispered, confusing me. I felt weak in the knees from the look he was giving me. He was without a doubt the most intense person I had ever met.
Tanner trailed his fingertip along my jaw before standing up and walking away. I stared at him retreating back, feeling like the room was closing in around me. I sat there alone, wondering what was taking Shawn so long. The night had shifted into unknown territory, and I honestly just felt like leaving.