I go to work, knowing the black Chevy truck following me is his friend from the gym. I know it’s his way of making sure he knows I get there, and that kind of protection means everything to me.
“What are you thinking?” he asks in a tired whisper.
Without thinking, I respond, “That I should walk away so you aren’t so stressed.”
He sits up, now wide awake and angry. “Do you really think that would help?”
Before I can respond, I am on my back, and he is kissing the life out of me. I can’t breathe, but I don’t want it to stop. I could die like this, and I would be happy.
He pulls away, panting, his green eyes ablaze. “Have I not proven to you every day that I want you here?”
“Yes, but—”
“Have I not shown you how much I want you, need you?”
“Yes, but—”
“But nothing.” He whips the covers off me. Then I feel him push up my nightgown and yank down my panties. He grabs himself and thrusts almost viciously inside of me as he cries out my name then pulls back. He thrusts in, pulls back, thrusts in…“You leave, and I will find you.”
My body trembles. He isn’t just fucking me; he is fucking away my insecurities.
“I love you!” I cry out.
He stills. His eyes show emotion—pain, I think. He doesn’t respond. He clamps his eyes shut and fucks me through orgasm after orgasm after beautiful orgasm. Then he comes with a roar, his heavy, thick cock twitching wildly inside me, but he doesn’t stop. He continues fucking.
I watch through my half-closed eyes as he glares at me. His body—oh, God, his body—is glorious. His muscles flex as he works me and himself into another release.
He then falls on top of me, panting, his chest rising and falling against mine. He dips his head down and rubs his stubble across my tight nipples, and then I feel him growing inside me again.
He pushes up on his arms, and this time, he slowly pushes in farther. Then he bends his head and kisses my cheek, my ear.
“If that’s true…” he pants. “If what you said is true”—he pulls out until his thick, broad head is the only part inside of my raw, sore pussy—“then you better never run from me, Lo. And you better never think that you are a burden.” He drives into me. “Together?”
“Yes,” I say as tears roll down my cheeks. “Yes!”
Slowly, lazily, he thrusts in and out.
I cup my breasts, and he groans, “Fuck.”
His pace quickens, and then he falls apart. He kisses me, pulls out, and steps off the bed.
“Don’t you move.”
“I don’t think I can,” I whisper.
He smiles. It’s a small yet very pride-filled smile. “Perfect.”
I hear the water running in the shower, and as much as I enjoy our lazy morning showers together, I can’t move. So I close my eyes and let exhaustion and the safety of knowing he wants me here as much as I want him lull me back to sleep.
—
I wake up to the smell of bacon and the feeling of stickiness between my legs. I force myself up and look at the clock. It’s nearly noon. I never sleep this late, but I also never had sex like that first thing in the morning, either.
In the shower, I think about the fact that I admitted I love him. He didn’t say the same, which should worry me, but it doesn’t. He shows me as much every day. I just hope he never feels like I am taking more than I am giving or will someday be able to give.
I love him. I love him madly. Never in my life have I or would I be able to feel safer than I do with him.
I get out of the shower and grab the white, terry-cloth robe he brought home for me. In hot pink on the back, it says Cobra. It is the first thing a man has ever bought for me.
I smile as I dry my hair and then laugh as I walk out. I am met with cold eyes.
“Good morning.”
He holds up my phone. “What’s this?”
I shrug, having no idea what he is talking about.
“Messages from Ryan Bennett, asking why you blocked him.”
“He was messaging a lot, asking when I’m coming home”—I shrug—“so I told him I was home. He sent a few more, and I blocked him.”
He lets out a deep breath. “You decided not to tell me because…?”
“Because we have enough between us, and we don’t need him added on, Jason. I blocked him. I have no idea how he got back through.”
“I will deal with him,” he snaps.
I shake my head. “No.”
“Excuse me?” His eyes bug out, and I can’t help laughing. “Did I say something funny?”
“No, yes, maybe?” I sigh. “He would absolutely press charges if you did something, Jason.” I look down. The next part, I whisper, partially because he didn’t return my sentiments earlier. “I don’t think I could handle life without you.”
I glance up to see his chest visibly expand as he takes in a sharp breath. “Jesus. Come here.”
In his arms, I agree to block his calls, but any messages Ryan sends, he wants to not only know about, but he wants to see them. I make him promise to do the same with Missy.
He looks down at me and tries not to smirk. “She’s called twice. Does that make you jealous?”
I pout. “Very.”
“Hmm…” He pulls my head to his chest, and I swear he is chuckling.
“It’s not funny.”
“Sorry, angel, but it actually feels really good.” He pulls back and looks down. “I’m fucked up.”
“Then we are perfect together.”
“Damn right we are.”
—
We eat brunch, and then I make my way into the bedroom to change the sheets. He smirks when he sees me carrying them out, and I giggle. He makes me feel that way—happy.
“Lo, these boxes have been stacked up in the living room for a while,” he points out when I come back through.
“What’s in them?”
“Stuff from your sister’s room: a few photo albums, some jewelry, and a diary I found under her mattress. There’s also stuff from your room in that basement. Not all the granny panties made it.”
I feel my face turn beet red, and he laughs.
“I’m kidding. No woman ever looked hotter in briefs, Lo.”
I don’t say anything because I am seriously concerned with my wardrobe now.
“Lo?”
“I need to go shopping,” I declare. “I ordered everything, and I know it’s probably not what you’re used to, and I—”
“Slow down, Lo. I was joking. To be honest, you in scrubs does it for me. You naked ensures you’ll always do it for me.”
“I want to go shopping,” I repeat.
“Then we’re going shopping.” He nods. “But understand, I’m gonna be making you try on everything.”
—
Jason places four bags in the backseat of the car then climbs in. He looks over at me, and I see that he is happy, so happy.
He leans over and grabs the back of my head, pulling me to him. “I can’t believe you wouldn’t let me watch you change.” Then he kisses me.
“I can’t believe I didn’t, either,” I grumble, narrowing my eyes at him.
“That’s on you.” He reaches over and grabs my seatbelt, snapping it in place before starting his car.
I remain quiet, thinking about how very jealous I am of the way the salesclerks and shoppers looked at him. He is hard to miss. Over six feet tall with spiky, blond hair; piercing green eyes; and a light shadow of a beard dusting his square, chiseled jaw. He has on black, worn jeans that hang low on his narrow hips and a light gray T-shirt tucked in that does nothing to hide his broad chest, bulging biceps, or the muscled forearms.
He takes my hand and pulls it to his lips. “You’re quiet.”
“It’s exhausting,” I say as I lean my head back.
He chuckles. “Shopping?”
“No, watching all of those women check you out.” I sigh. “I don’t like it.”
/> “There were women in the stores?” he questions, looking over at me.
I roll my eyes. “Yes.”
“All I saw was you.” He smirks. “And underwear.”
“Yes, I am aware that you saw underwear.” I smirk, pointing behind us at all the bags filled with them.
“I can’t wait to take them all off of you,” he says in a throaty voice.
—
Going back to work is not something I want to do, but I love my job. I have to keep telling myself that, because deep down I know it’s true, though I don’t care right now.
Every day, I am faced with a new tragedy, the unexpected, looking into the eyes of someone who has just had their world rocked by the unforeseen. Every day, I feel their pain, and every day, I cannot wait to run back to Jason.
I stand in the nurses’ lounge, gathering my things to head home. I smile at the thought and shake my head.
“Everything okay, Lorraine?” I jump when I hear Dr. Bennett behind me. “Did I scare you?”
I turn around and shake my head. “No, just startled me a bit. That’s all.”
“You seem detached, like you’re not really all here,” he says as he sits down.
“I’m fine. Truly, I am,” I respond as I put on my coat and turn around. “How are you?”
“I’m worried about you.” He looks up at me. “The man you’re living with is violent, Lorraine. You can’t feel good about that. It has to dredge up bad memories.” He raises his eyebrows at me and lowers his voice. “I know he’s the patient we treated who wouldn’t give any information. I’ve known since he brought you in. He lives a dangerous life, Lorraine.”
“I understand your concern, and I truly appreciate it, but he is a good man.”
“And you believe this?” The flippant way he says it rubs me the wrong way. It confuses me, makes me feel defensive. Regardless, I know it’s out of concern.
I set my bag down and sit, even though I know Jason is expecting me and I don’t want him to worry.
“I feel safe with him, protected.” I look down. “I have very strong feelings for him, feelings I have never had for anyone.”
He looks at me, his expression unreadable. “He is unstable at best.”
“I understand how you may feel that way, but he is the most stable thing I have had in years.”
He shrugs. “Did we not help you enough? Did we fail you in some way?”
“I just need to move forward.” As soon as the words escape my lips, the other Dr. Bennett walks in. Ryan.
“Move forward?” His voice shakes, and I fear his tone, his demeanor, will give away our secret.
I stand up and smile. “I’m very sorry if you feel put off by this. It’s not my intention. Please excuse me. Jason is waiting for me.” I walk away quickly and make my way out the door as fast as I can.
“Lorraine, wait!” I hear Ryan call me from behind. “Dammit, I need to talk to you.”
I hear an engine roar and know without looking it’s the black Chevy truck, the lights brightening the darkened parking lot.
I stop and turn around. Ryan is unaffected by the revving engine.
When he gets close enough, I hold up my hand. “Stop.”
“Stop what, exactly?” Ryan sounds annoyed.
“Stop calling. Stop following me. Stop, Ryan, and move on. Heidi would want that.”
He looks as though I have slapped him in the face. “So, that’s it? She means nothing to you anymore? I mean nothing to you?”
I shake my head. “That’s not true. I just think we need to focus on the future.”
“And he is your future?” Ryan closes his eyes and looks down.
“Without a doubt,” I answer. “Be happy for me, Ryan, and find happiness for you, too.”
I turn and use the key fob to unlock my vehicle. I get in, start the car, and pull out of the parking lot, knowing I am safe and hopeful that this is the end to my confrontations with Ryan.
While I drive home, the lights behind me don’t follow closely, but I see them.
Jason Stanley—Cobra, the abused boy, the man who made horrible mistakes—is changed. He is watching over me. He is making sure my past is lit up and I am no longer incapacitated because of it. He is my beacon, a light to follow. My future is no longer scary and alone.
Not everything is certain or uncomplicated, but my feelings for him are without a doubt.
Chapter 24
Jason
My phone pings with a text from Brock. It’s a location and time for a fight tonight. I’ve had my fighting on hold for healing and then to help Lo. She’s been my release and my focus. I haven’t needed to pound someone into the ground like before. My stomach tightens at the thought of leaving Lo at home. However, my own insecurities of losing my cool with her have me needing to release Cobra, at least for a few strikes tonight. I have spent so much time keeping myself in check, maybe now is the time to let loose and see if I really have found a way to overcome my own past.
Having an office job, even one I hate, has afforded me time and access. Lorraine’s dad stumbled upon not only my father beating the shit out of me when I was younger, but he also uncovered numerous district redistributions of thousands in construction funds. Projects that council members voted on and approved were never completed. The trails move the money to multiple people, all of whom landed on Lorraine’s suspect list, my father included.
Having all my documentation copied and saved, as well as locked away for an insurance plan, I know the only person left who could have killed her family was Waters, possibly with the help of my father.
Inside, I’m twisted at the knowledge that the man who gave me life could have taken Lo’s whole family from her. If I can prove he did this, I swear on everything I have ever done right or wrong, I will be the one to serve my own fucking justice for me, for Lo, for her mom, her dad, and for her twin sister. Corruption feeds corruption.
Waters, too. I will take every fucker who caused her this pain down one by one.
The king cobra inside me is ready to strike. I feel the agitation and the tension building in every fiber of my being. Whomever I fight tonight, they better bring their game, because I’m hell-bent on destroying someone or something today.
When my cell rings, I force my mind to steady.
“Yo,” I answer without looking at the caller ID.
“I know what you’ve found, Jason. We need to meet,” my father says in a low tone.
“No time.”
“I need to explain. There are more people you will hurt with this information than me.”
I laugh. “You don’t need to do shit, Dad, except stay the fuck away from me and Lo.”
“You owe me this.”
Rage fills me. I don’t hold back as I stand from my desk and shut my office door. “I don’t owe you one motherfucking thing. You better pray to any god, or the devil himself, that I don’t find the reason and opportunity to take you down. Steer clear of me and mine, Father, and I’ll do the same.”
“Don’t you threaten me, boy!”
“I’m no boy, and it’s no threat.” I don’t give him another minute of my time before I disconnect the call.
Immediately, my phone rings again, and again, I don’t bother to look at the screen. Sliding my finger to accept the call, I want nothing more than to throw the fucking thing.
“Motherfucker, I told you to back the fuck off!”
“Jason,” Lo says my name softly, and I can hear her concern.
“Lo, did my father call you? Or come see you?” I bark out as I grab my keys. If he has reached out to her in any way, I’m going to fuck him up right now.
“No, I was calling to see if you planned to go to the gym after work or go home.” She starts to ramble. “I had a moment, and I, uh…I thought about dinner. I could bring it home after work, which would be your normal gym time. If you’re going home right after, though, you would have to wait the few hours till my shift ends.”
“I have a fight.”
I try to calm my breathing and steady my voice. I don’t want her to be upset at work over some bullshit with my father. I also don’t want to let her know I am suspicious of him until I have more proof.
I wasn’t kidding. If I find he had anything—and I mean anything—to do with her family’s deaths, I will kill him with my own two hands.
“Oh, um…what time?” She hesitates. “I could come to wherever you are—well, that is, if you want me to.”
I’m so amped up. Maybe she does need to come and see me fight.
“Yeah, I’ll get you the info. You really think you can handle this shit, Lo?”
She doesn’t hesitate at all. “There is nothing I can’t face, can’t do, or can’t see as long as I’m with you. Together?”
The beast inside me settles at her final word.
“Together,” I whisper.
“All right, I’ll see you there, then. Anything else I need to know?”
“Not right now, angel. I promise, when we have time, I will share with you, but this isn’t the time.”
“Okay. I’ll see you tonight.” She clicks off, and I am left in shock.
She said okay without missing a beat. She takes me as I am at every turn. I have never had someone who is with me through everything no matter what.
Regardless, fight night with my woman in my corner causes apprehension to hit me. The last woman I introduced to my world used it all against me time and time again. Lorraine isn’t Missy, though. I finally have a woman in my life who doesn’t get off on my pain.
The rest of my day passes with me amped up to beat the shit out of my opponent. Brock is picking up Lo so she doesn’t have to drive or worry about getting in tonight. I want her to know she is safe with me, even if I’m not directly by her side. Shit gets real at these things, and it certainly isn’t the place for just anyone.
This one, we get to fight in the basement of an old gym on the other side of Detroit. Walking in through the front door is an odd feeling, but somehow, it doesn’t seem as dirty as what I’m used to.
For a moment, I let myself believe I’m doing something on the up and up.
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