Realizing there was no one around to relieve me of this torture, I blew a stray lock of hair out of my eyes with a puff of breath and attempted to put on my best game face—determined to keep my cool. He was next in line.
Smiling kindly at the old lady in front of him, I stuffed her dollar in the money bag and kept my head down, worried my words would stumble if I looked into his eyes. Call me crazy, but those stupid, teenage fluttery feelings took over my stomach at the mere closeness of him. I probably looked weak and scared—words usually never used to describe me.
“Well hello, Libby,” a warm, raspy voice said. The fact he spoke my name actually gave me strength to be the girl I knew was hiding inside me somewhere.
Raising my head and meeting his beautiful, blue eyes, I smiled. “Max. Haven’t seen you around in a while. How the hell are ya?” I was beyond grateful my voice didn’t crack when his name spilled from my lips.
“Doin’ good. Just moved back to town now that I’m stationed at the base nearby.” His eyes roamed down my body and back up to meet my eyes. “Looks to me like I’ve missed a lot while I was gone.” The smile he so sinfully wore on his face made my insides melt like a tween at a One Direction concert. The fact one man could make me feel that way was both exciting and embarrassing.
And again, I was speechless. Was he paying me a compliment? My brain couldn’t seem to comprehend what was happening, so I just stood there and grinned like a damn fool.
Leaning toward me, he crooked his finger and signaled for me to come closer. My heart was nearly leaping from my chest at the thought of him so near. He smelled good too. I had to rein in all the self-control I could muster in order to keep from blatantly sniffing him.
With his warm breath feathering over my ear, he said, “So, I’m a little embarrassed. I got in this line thinking I was lining up for a kiss with—”
“We don’t have all day,” a crabby woman behind Max said, cutting off his words. If I weren’t representing the animal shelter, I would have told the lady to fuck off.
Smiling kindly, I held out my hand for his donation and said, “You ready to get your mac on with a basset hound?”
Shaking his head comically, he let out a light chuckle and held up a twenty between his fingers. His instruction for me to keep the change startled me a bit. We’d had several people give us an extra dollar or two toward the fundraising efforts, but no one had offered quite so much.
Stepping over to the line of dogs, he looked back in my direction and gave me a wink before allowing Henry to slobber all over his cheek.
I couldn’t contain my laughter as I watched him wipe his face on his sleeve.
Gathering money from a few more people, I looked back to find where Max had gone. My excitement plummeted when I realized he was no longer in sight. I shouldn’t have been surprised that he chose not to stick around.
The shelter coordinator, Debbie, startled me from my thoughts and said, “Libby, you better take off if you’re going to make it to the parade in time.”
“You sure? I could probably stay a little longer if you need me.”
“No, we’re good. The line is starting to die down anyway. With four adoptions and all the money we’ve raised, today has been a huge success,” she said with a kind pat to my shoulder. “Go have fun.”
After saying my goodbyes to the dogs, paying special attention to Henry, my new, favorite basset hound, I began walking away from the park and headed toward Main Street to meet my family. It was tradition—every year, we made sure to watch the Independence Day parade together. No matter how busy life was, we always set aside time for each other.
“Can I walk with you?” a voice boomed next to me, scaring me out of my own skin.
“Holy—” I gasped and grabbed my chest in surprise. “Damn it. You startled me!” I said, pushing at him.
His laugh was infectious, and soon, we were both chuckling as we continued walking.
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. So, where ya headed?”
“Just to watch the parade,” I said as I pointed to the next block over. “You?”
“I guess I’m going to watch the parade too then.” His admission that he was following me had me grinning from ear to ear. That expression always seemed strange to me until that day.
*****
The grin continues to hurt my cheeks at the memory of how he sat next to me at the parade. I remember noticing his eyes never really left my face, all the while pretending to watch the floats go by.
Yes, that birthday was definitely one of the best days of my life.
As I place the last of the letters back inside the wooden container, the memory starts to fade, and I begin to fret again about the most important letter I seem to have misplaced.
“Oh well,” I say with a sigh. I’ve made the decision not to dwell on it. It has to be around here somewhere. As soon as I stop looking for it, it’ll pop up.
Closing the lid, I run my fingers over the beautiful mountain etching that adorns the surface. For Liberty is scrawled on the front, and I just love that little detail my grandparents had customized. I’m sure they never realized how perfect it would be.
Reaching to the bedside table, I place the box carefully on the surface and immediately eyeball the book I was reading last night. Little bits of paper haphazardly peek out between the pages and it suddenly dawns on me...
“Holy shit!” I exclaim as I bolt upright, grab the novel, and start rapidly fanning through the pages. In my sleep-filled haze last night, I must’ve used the letter as a bookmark.
Not caring if I lose my spot, I slide the folded notebook paper from between the pages and smile. I didn’t completely lose it after all.
The sun is now glaring through the bedroom window, and I find its warmth comforting as I unfold the tattered pages with careful consideration. Peace fills my soul as my gaze lands on his handwriting—the words For Liberty scrawled at the top of the page.
Knowing I have plenty of time before I need to get ready for work, I settle on my bed to read it once more.
For Liberty,
Boy, do I miss saying your name. Sometimes, when I’m alone and missing you terribly, I whisper the most beautiful name ever to grace my lips. I can’t wait for the day I get to feather it against your skin again. I know it has been a month since my deployment, and I’m not sure how long it will take this letter to find its way to you, but I just need you to know how much I miss you. Your face, your smell, your laugh, your love... Christ, I miss all of you, Libby.
Oh, how I wish I could be next to you when the first of dawn breaks. I hold onto the memory of your soft skin beneath my touch—your warmth wrapped tightly in my arms as I listen to you breathe deeply in sleep. My dreams of you each and every morning are what help me cope... help me rise each day to face this restless existence I lead. Without your love on my mind, I don’t know how this life of war could be bearable.
I feel as if this scrap of paper isn’t enough to hold the words to describe how deeply I am in love with you. But now, being here without your sweet voice to soothe me, I realize just how important it is for one to hear the words from their lover. I love you, my darling Libby. I long for the day I can hear those same words leave your lips again.
No truer words were ever spoken than that of an author unknown who said, “A soldier doesn’t fight because he hates what is in front of him. A soldier fights because he loves what he left behind.” So, while I’m missing you, I remind myself of why I’m really here: For Liberty.
With all my love,
Max
P.S. Tell Henry I miss his kisses too.
His postscript has me chuckling as I recall the day he brought my favorite basset hound home from the shelter. My laughter quickly fades at the thought of him feeling sad or alone. Due to the top-secret security of his assignment, I haven’t had a way to reciprocate my love for him or to tell him the good news. With each day that passes, I ache to disclose just how much he means to me.
Touching
my rounded belly and feeling the life growing inside me, I can’t help the trepidation that seeps into my thoughts. The fact I have no way to tell the love of my life he will be a father scares me shitless. I can’t stop myself from getting all teary-eyed knowing he won’t be here for the birth of his son.
What will his reaction be when he comes home to find a child in my arms? I can only hope he will be filled with even half the amount of joy I feel at the thought of having his baby.
Chapter Two
Maximus
For Liberty,
The sun is just about to set behind a ridge of exposed rock. While the sun’s rays are casting beautiful colors along the tan surface, I can’t help but look at it with disdain. These mountainous terrains are nothing but a barren wasteland compared to your beauty, and I despise it for keeping me away from you for so long. As I look down upon the green valley below, I envision that the snowy peaks glow with your light rather than the final rays of sun. Another day has come and gone without being near you. As the air continues to cool with the approach of autumn, my heart aches for your warmth.
Adrenaline is still pumping through my veins from a rather challenging day of travel. The smell of dinner being prepared by my brothers is but little comfort as I peer out among the steep faces of the mountains.
While I try to keep my letters free of the horrors of war, today’s encounter continues to haunt me, and I long for nothing more than to talk to you about the trials I’m forced to face each day.
Kenz and I were resting against a boulder on one of the many steep inclines, joking about how some of these traitorous peaks might’ve never been traveled before. Suddenly, what I could only describe as wisps of air began to gust around my head. Almost simultaneously, I heard the distinctive popping noise of bullets as they fluttered above us. From the top of the beautiful mountaintop we had just deemed unreachable, the Taliban had opened fire, ensnaring us in a place far more familiar to them than we dared to admit to ourselves.
Now that we’ve fought our way through the ambush and set up camp, I am able to sit and think about all that transpired over the past few hours. It’s too bad I can’t enjoy the mid-September weather on one of the most beautiful mountain ranges I’ve ever seen. Instead, reality hits me like a brick with the awareness that I’m in one of the most dangerous combat zones in the world: the foothills of the Hindu Kush in Afghanistan. I wish I could tell you more, but alas, I am sworn to keep our whereabouts a secret.
It almost seems like I’m on a different world up here—isolated from everything I’ve known—my brothers being the only solace to my lonely heart. Even though I feel like the infinite mountains dominate our every move, it is obvious to me that this ugly war is what really controls our fate.
“Hey, Beck. You done fuckin’ your chick through the holes in that paper?” Not wanting him to see my letter to Libby, I quickly stuff it under my ratty pillow and turn to glare at my buddy.
“Don’t be jealous, Kenz.” Jayson McKenzie is by far the douchiest, yet most honorable man I know. My battle buddy to the end, he also lives and breathes to give me shit.
“Jealous? Naw,” he says with a wave of his hand as he plops down on the cot across from me. “I think it’s sweet you’re so in touch with your feminine side. Plus, you gotta send love to your dog back home, right?”
Tossing my pencil at him, the eraser hits him square in the eye.
“Mother fuck!” he exclaims. “Really, dude? I was just fucking with you. No need to pull out the big guns and assault me.”
“Stop whining. You’re the one who came in here starting shit,” I say while bending over to pick up my only pencil. A light grunt comes from somewhere deep within me as I straighten back up, my muscles screaming after our continuous travels through the steep terrain. “What do you want, anyway?”
“I was just checkin’ on you. You seemed a bit rattled once we made camp.” His tone dipping to a lower level makes it obvious these are more serious matters than our joking moments ago.
“Yeah, Kenz, I’m good. Just needed a breather, that’s all.”
“Good enough,” he says, standing and pausing before exiting the tent. He runs his fingers over his short, dusty blond hair and sighs. “I’m actually a bit jealous you have something to go home to when this shitstorm is all over. Say hi to your girl for me, will ya?”
Well, damn. What the hell am I supposed to say in response to that? “Will do,” is the only words I can muster. It’s lame, but, as men, we usually don’t need to overembellish our thoughts to each other.
Taking a deep breath and cleansing my thoughts of how lonely my friend must be, I pull the papers from beneath my makeshift pillow and read the last few sentences of the letter in progress. I know the military will censor my letter somehow, especially since I’m taking too many liberties already. Needing to change the tone and make sure my entire letter isn’t redacted, I decide to jump right in with Kenz’s request.
Kenz says hello. The poor schmuck likes to pick on me for writing to you so often, but I can tell he’s even lonelier than he lets on. I know I talk about him a lot in my letters, and I can’t wait for you to meet him someday. He truly is a good friend, regardless of how much of an asshole he can be at times.
With dinner almost ready, I must be going now. Before I end this letter, my love, I want to leave you with one memory I often think of when I’m missing you...
Our first kiss.
Forever and always,
Max
I can’t help but smile with the memory of that day. Although I didn’t know it at the time, it was her twenty-second birthday. She was so damn sexy in her cute little cut-off jean shorts and plaid, button-up shirt, the hem tied around her waist to show her seriously feminine curves and that adorable navel ring.
Even though I knew her back in high school, I admittedly didn’t give her much notice. At the time, she was a young girl. But while I was away, she changed, blossoming into the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid my eyes on.
I remember gravitating toward her that day—hopeful she’d remember who I was after all those years. I was far from a virgin at the time, but I’d never remembered feeling so nervous about kissing a woman as I did that night, under the stars, as we watched the fireworks burst overhead.
To this day, I can still feel the butterflies in my stomach as I recall putting the moves on her. I tried so hard to be confident, but inside, I had the fear any normal guy would at the risk of being turned down.
She was so beautiful as she gazed up at the exploding bits of fire, the colors dancing in her eyes and illuminating her milky white skin. Before the grand finale, I reached out, touched her cheek ever so slightly, and held my breath as I turned her face toward mine. Tracing my finger along the bottom of her jaw, I looked into her eyes, begging... pleading for her to grant me permission to kiss her.
And she did. Not only did she allow me to kiss her, she returned the kiss with lips of fire. Her tongue was soft and sweet as she gently darted it out to meet mine. The exploding fireworks up in the sky were nothing in comparison to the scorching heat singeing my insides—because of her. She gave a whole new meaning to grand finales.
“Beck, you comin’?” Kenz asks, poking his head through the slats in the tent. He doesn’t wait for my response before he backs out, the sounds of his footfalls getting quieter as he gets further away.
“Yeah, I’m comin’,” I whisper to myself, folding the pages of my letter and stuffing it back beneath my so-called pillow.
Someday soon, I’ll be in her arms... home.
Chapter Three
Liberty
“So, when is he due back?” Holly asks as she hefts the bucket of feed and makes her way over toward the troughs. Because I am now seven months pregnant, my sister has to come to work with me and help with the heavy lifting. Busying myself with grooming one of the horses, I think about how to answer.
“He left in May, and it’s supposed to be a year-long tour. In his letters, he makes i
t clear he will return in May.” I pause. I’m always unsure of how much information I want to share with my family members. They don’t need to know all the nitty-gritty details. “One can only hope,” I add with a shrug.
Dropping the bucket with a loud thud, she stares at me wide-eyed, completely ignoring the startled horses now prancing about in their stalls—one of them right next to me.
“What?” I ask with a shrug, completely bewildered as to why she is staring at me as if I have three heads.
“You mean to tell me he won’t be back before the baby is born?” The horses twitch with her high-pitched voice, and I decide it best to step away from them until she gets herself under control. Last thing I need is a kick to the stomach because they feel threatened in any way.
“Hol, you need to chill. And no,” I answer, shaking my head, “he won’t be back.” With my gaze down to avoid her scolding stare, I click the stall shut on my last word.
“How are you going to handle this... all on your own?” she questions, the worry evident in her tone.
“I’ll make do. I’ll figure something out, I’m sure. Plus, I won’t be alone. I’ll have you and Mom, right?” I ask with a shy shrug and a tilt to my head.
“Well, of course! That’s a given. I’m just surprised the Army won’t let him come back for something as important as the birth of his own child,” she says with a wave of her hand as she sits on one of the barrels of hay.
“Well, there’s something I haven’t told you,” I confess, sitting beside her and laying back on the plush hay. The blades prick a little, but the rich, potent smell is comforting to me in some way.
“Well?” she prods, turning sideways and propping herself up on her elbow. Her dainty fingers thread through her now-brunette locks, and I wonder if that massive rock on her finger ever gets stuck in her fake-colored hair. Her husband went all out when he chose to put an ice rink on her hand.
Red Hot and BOOM! A Sizzling Hot Collection of Stories from the Red Hot Authors Page 9