by Ophelia Bell
“I can’t imagine what that must be like.” She gripped my hand and squeezed. “Well, we have the music to shore us up in the meantime. Maybe one of those boys you brought with you will help you forget what you’re missing for a time. I saw the pretty golden boy in there look at you like you were his sun. I admit, I kind of hoped you’d show up and take away Bodhi’s loneliness. He’s worse off than I am. I thought you two had a spark yesterday but if you already have a man, I won’t encourage Bodhi to get between you.”
I didn’t want to complicate the conversation by explaining what Rohan and I were to each other, though I honestly wasn’t quite sure myself. I knew what I wanted us to be, but I also knew I wanted that with Ozzie despite his avoidance of me, and I had once wanted it with Llyr and that had backfired.
My experience with Bodhi so far had been a sweet, though brief, connection through the song we’d shared in his grandmother’s hospital room. If I were honest with myself, he was better off not falling for me anyway.
“He’ll find someone, I promise,” I said, giving her hand a squeeze. “Shall we go in and add our voices to that ruckus? I think it’ll keep the loneliness at bay if we sing for a while.”
23
Llyr
I was an ass for storming out of there as butt-hurt as Ozzie had been when he’d left our meeting earlier that day, but I had to admit I understood exactly where Ozzie was coming from. Deva didn’t understand what she was dealing with. Granted, neither did any of us—we couldn’t even see the damn creatures—but she was being too reckless for my taste.
It was my job to rein her in. To protect her. At least, that’s what Neph had drilled into me before allowing me to begin my search. I had already endured his punishment and Nikhil’s wrath for daring to touch their daughter, who they believed was innocent and impressionable. But when I’d tasted her sweet nectar, I’d had a glimpse of the depths of her knowledge that not even my blood link to her gave me.
As a satyr, I was tied to the water, and any fluid that contained water held power for me. Deva’s arousal, tasted from the silken petals of her sex, had told me more about her than she would have been able to convey with mere words. It may have been her song that had bound me to her, but her taste had already set me on the path of no return.
It was her generous nature that did me in. She had no soul to offer a lover, so she made up for it by sheer force of will. Kindness, love, and a boundless need to protect but not smother. I wondered if she got those traits from her mothers, because her dads were mostly overbearing asses from where I stood. We often give what we crave most in return, and in Deva I saw a woman so desperate for true love she let herself open her heart without thinking.
That was why it hurt so much to see a different side of her. Pettiness didn’t look good on her, and I’d been rash to just turn and leave, but it stung because her reaction was not unwarranted. I’d been unfair. I’d been a complete ass to her mere moments after having my dick inside her, so I deserved her mistrust and knew I’d have to work to redeem myself.
But as I started to drift back to Ozzie’s house and give her space, I stopped, my molecules already dissipated into watery mist but still hovering in the air in the Dylans’ upstairs bathroom where I’d retreated. I couldn’t just leave, not when it was my duty to protect her, even if I was protecting her from herself.
I let my molecules float on the air current flowing through the open window. It carried me back out into the hallway of the big house and down the stairwell, only requiring a slight effort to steer. I hovered above the crowd near the ceiling like a ghost, simply observing while Deva and Maddie Dylan sang together with the other guys playing.
I’d had the pleasure of hearing Fate’s Fools perform a few times in the past year since the war, gravitating back to their music regularly like their songs were anthems to my captivity. I’d been lucky enough to hear both iterations of the band, and admitted I liked the variety Rohan and Keagan lent to the sound. Fate’s Fools was traditionally a turul band, but had unofficially become the poets laureate of all the higher races and so it made sense for the band to be a mix. All they were missing was a nymphaea member and they’d be the perfect musical embodiment of all four races.
Something about watching Deva make music with the others made me regret my tantrum. Her voice held the entire party captive. Even Maddie had stopped singing and dragged out a pair of conga drums to fill in the percussion that was lacking without Ozzie here.
Deva was in her element, glowing with absolute delight at being able to exercise her power in a way that mattered. She had come into her own in my arms in a pool in the center of the Haven three weeks ago, her sleek curves naked before my hungry eyes as she took command of her own pleasure, and mine, to complete the ritual that would protect us all.
But that moment was not the pinnacle of her power, and she knew that. Her awakening was only just beginning, and I didn’t care whether she never spoke to me again; I just wanted to be here to see her bloom.
But Gaia save me, I still wanted her now more than ever, and hoped that once she found what she needed with the others, she would still have room for me. Because watching her in the midst of the three men, I could see pieces of their shared futures. They would not be parted long again after tonight, the four of them. Whether that meant she’d choose them all for mates, or simply as partners in her quest, I couldn’t tell.
All I knew was that they couldn’t keep their eyes off her any more than I could.
I didn’t need to be here. Not with the three of them so intently focused on her, but I couldn’t leave just yet.
I waited for a pause in the revelry when they broke for drinks, then lingered outside the downstairs bathroom, coalescing into my human form in the shadows. When Keagan opened the door and saw me propped against the wall with my hands in my pockets, he smirked and crossed his arms. “Thought your ass was long gone by now. Where the fuck have you been hiding all night? Or did you just come slinking back to apologize for acting like a little pussy?”
I narrowed my eyes at him, curious whether he had a death wish for calling me that. He wasn’t the biggest ursa I’d faced—Cade Windchaser held that honor—but he was far from the smallest, and in his semi-drunken state looked like he might actually want to pick a fight just to blow off steam. I shook my head and chuckled.
“I’m here for her. That’s all. But I don’t think my talents are best used on her at the moment.”
Keagan leaned against the door jamb and lifted one dark eyebrow. “Your talents, huh? You looking for an alternate outlet since Deva won’t give you the time of day after the shit you pulled? I’ve got an idea for you right here.” Dropping his hand, he gripped his crotch and squeezed. “Satyrs are as fluid as they come and I’m at loose ends what with Deva hogging Rohan for herself and all. Come back in here and let’s see if we can put your talents to use.”
I blinked at him slowly and inhaled a calming breath. It didn’t take a taste of his essence to figure out he was jealous, but I was half tempted anyway just to see what I could learn. What the hell? Why not get to know him a little better if I was trusting him with Deva for the night?
All it took was a look. When my powers took effect, his gaze was glued to my eyes, hypnotized by the eddies within. Then with the preternatural grace and swiftness imbued in my race by our watery origins, I pushed him back into the bathroom and pressed against the counter in the span of a breath.
“Not what I meant, but you’ve intrigued me,” I said, grabbing his jaw in both hands and pressing my mouth to his. He grunted at the invasion of my tongue into his mouth, but didn’t protest. On the contrary, he let out an almost pitiful whimper of need before hooking an arm around my shoulders and tilting his head to return the kiss with desperation I could literally taste on his tongue beyond the flavor of hoppy beer and salted corn chips.
Sadly, all I needed was that taste. I didn’t want to linger here when there were more constructive things I could be doing to help Deva’s cau
se. But the taste told me what I needed to know.
I pushed back and patted Keagan on the shoulder. “I have to run. I need you to make sure she’s taken care of tonight. Kept safe.”
He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and blinked at me. “Why the fuck don’t you ask Ro? Or Bodhi? She’s got him wrapped around her little finger, too. I’m the last person you should ask because apparently I’m the only one of you fucks who doesn’t think the sun rises and sets out of that girl’s snatch.”
Snorting softly I shook my head and patted his cheek. “You believe what you will, Keagan Sundance. You’re as much hers as any of us, whether you like it or not. But you’re the only one of the three of you who won’t get distracted by her, at least not yet. Your time will come. Until then, just watch her, even if it hurts.”
“It doesn’t . . .” He paused and grimaced at the lie he was about to tell, then just said, “Fuck you, just fucking go. She’ll be safe enough as long as I’m here.”
“Good. Maybe switch to water at least.” I kissed him again, more slowly this time while I infused his cells with a dose of moisture to combat the alcohol. Then I began the drift once more, hovering in the shadowy room for a moment longer before finding the River’s currents. In that moment Keagan let out a frustrated groan and threw his head back, staring at the ceiling. Finally, he took a deep breath and stood, steadier now than he’d been a few minutes ago, and headed back to the party.
With a mere thought, I shot back to Ozzie’s house, intent on unearthing whatever secrets that I could, because I was dead set on finding out what the bastard had done to her.
24
Deva
The music proved to be a balm for all of us. Bodhi played piano as adeptly as he played guitar. Rohan’s loaned instrument was a sweet sounding acoustic guitar that he picked gently while crooning ballad after ballad to the enthralled crowd. Keagan accompanied them with a bass guitar Maddie handed him, urging him to be gentle with her. Keagan smirked and winked, saying in his deep voice, “You just listen to me while I make her purr,” earning him a blush and a scoff from Maddie.
Maddie and I took turns joining in and we sang until our voices were hoarse and the neighbors complained of the noise.
By then, we’d just ended yet another set of energetic songs, sweaty and elated. Rohan was in good spirits as he and Keagan jumped straight into another, quieter song, soaking up the adoration of the extended family of Dylans and their friends. I extracted myself to look for a fresh cold drink and found the kitchen. The atmosphere was so filled with love and happiness, it was the closest thing I’d felt to home since I’d arrived in the human world.
In fact, it was better because somehow it felt like it was all mine. I knew that was ridiculous, but now that I was beyond the walls of that hospital, the sheer possibilities out here in the human world seemed endless and I wanted so much to experience all I could.
“Want to see something amazing?” Bodhi asked, popping the cap off a bottle of beer and handing it to me.
“Absolutely!” I was so infused with adventure I didn’t want the night to end, even though I knew it couldn’t last forever.
“C’mon.” He tilted his head as he opened a second beer and then led me up a set of narrow back steps from the kitchen to the upper floors. We wound through the hallways of the big house I’d learned was their family home that had been the Dylans’ for generations. He slipped into a dark room and beckoned for me to follow. It was pitch black inside and even though I had excellent night vision, I could hardly see a thing.
I smacked into his back and nearly dropped my beer but grabbed hold tight just as it started to slip through my fingers.
“Sorry.” His breath rushed over my head and he moved, an arm coming up to reach around me. I stiffened at his closeness, blood rushing to my face and tingles flooding between my thighs. He smelled like salt and sage and I had the strangest urge to taste him. I heard a clicking sound behind me and then he cursed softly. “Light must be burnt out. That’s all right. We want it dark anyway.”
“W-we do?” I stammered.
“Yeah,” he said, his voice a gruff rumble as his hand found my hip. In the distance on the first floor I could hear Rohan’s melodic voice mingling with Keagan’s in a duet that suited the two of them perfectly, but when Bodhi’s breath gusted across my cheek all I could hear was the blood rushing through my eardrums.
“Deva, I—” I heard him swallow and he raised one warm hand to my cheek, caressing me gently. “I promise I didn’t bring you up here for anything dirty. Hell, this isn’t why I brought you up here at all, but it’s just easier to say in the dark. I’m not trying to steal someone else’s girl. I just—I’m dying to fucking kiss you.”
“Then kiss me,” I breathed. I reached up and gripped the back of his head with my free hand and pulled him down until our lips met, landing perfectly despite a complete and utter lack of direction in the darkness.
Bodhi moaned, his arms slipping around me. The cold dewy glass of his beer bottle pressed against my upper arm as he deepened the kiss and held me tight. He tasted of sweet malt and flowers, the cool velvet of his tongue teasing between my lips. My entire body lit on fire and I almost protested when he pulled away breathlessly barely a moment later.
“Goddamn,” he muttered. “Why can’t you be single?”
“I’m not taken if that’s what you mean.” I reached into the darkness, seeking him. He’d moved away, and I heard a soft curse followed by a crash. Impulsively I drew a measure of power through my limbs and produced a tiny orb of silver light. “Is this better?”
His handsome face blinked back at me from a crouching position where he was pawing around to find whatever he’d knocked down. A tall lamp was turned over on the floor. “Wow. that’s pretty slick,” he said, staring at the light that hovered above my palm.
“It’s not much.” I shrugged, sure he didn’t grasp at all how very unimpressive this little display of power really was compared to what I should be able to do.
“Reminds me of why I really brought you up here.” He grinned, then righted the lamp and moved toward a set of heavy curtains on the far side of what I realized was a bedroom, though it looked disused with boxes stacked in one corner and sheets covering most of the furniture.
Bodhi pushed the curtains aside, letting in the glow from the street outside through a pair of French doors. When he opened them, the music from below floated up, making me giddy with the memory of the last time I’d heard it—sang it. Bodhi stepped out onto a small balcony and leaned against the rail looking down with his head bobbing slightly to the rhythm. He glanced back at me and smiled. “They’re playing our song.”
“It’s their song, actually,” I said. When he frowned at me, I backtracked. “I only meant since they’re part of Fate’s Fools. It can be ours too. It is ours too.” I smiled and went to him, drawn by an odd pull brought on by the memory of the two of us singing the song together the day before. The sense of melancholy was only enhanced by the recent revelation that the song had been written by my own father and was probably inspired by the love he shared with Belah and their other two mates.
“Are you crying?” Bodhi asked, his confusion wiped away by concern as he reached for me.
“I just . . . really love that song.”
He pulled me into his arms where he leaned against the railing. I rested between his legs, our hips flush against each other with his hands at my waist.
“It is beautiful, like you,” he said, smoothing an errant tear away from my cheek. His face was in shadows but the glow of his aura illuminated him enough for me to see a dark flicker in his eyes fighting for dominance over the light.
I reached a hand to his face and stroked his cheek, grazing my fingertips over the soft stubble that lined his jaw. For a split second the light in his eyes overtook the darkness, but I knew it wouldn’t last, not as long as his soul carried those scars.
Aching to give him something to find joy in, I leaned up an
d pressed my lips to his again. He parted his lips and tilted his head, sliding his arms around my back. He kissed so differently from either Llyr or Rohan—the only two men I had ever kissed before. He was somehow more cautious, like he was afraid he’d scare me away if he pushed too hard.
The kiss went on and on, yet with each pull of lips and swipe of tongue I only wanted to taste more of him. His aura swelled with arousal, mirroring the pressure of the bulge in his pants where our hips fit together. The tingling of the power that was drawn to us incited an aching reminder of my waning magic, and the more we kissed, the greater that ache became.
Bodhi could fulfill that need, and perhaps in the process I could help banish some of that darkness from his soul, if only temporarily. I slipped one hand down the hard planes of his chest, pausing at the waistband of his jeans. When I ventured farther, grazing my palm over the ridge of his erection, he froze and exhaled sharply against my mouth.
“Deva . . . What about Rohan?”
“This is for Rohan,” I said, dropping my other hand down as I lowered myself between his thighs and unfastened the top button of his fly.
He clamped his hands over mine, halting my progress. A breeze blew in, carrying the scent of sea air and sage that enhanced Bodhi’s natural aroma, now mixed with the musky scent of his arousal. His dark hair fluttered around his cheeks as he stared down at me, clearly struggling over his decision to make me stop.
“It would be a gift,” I said, my mouth already watering for the sensation of his Nirvana and the flavor of his essence. Somehow explaining how I needed to make him come for selfish reasons didn’t seem appropriate.
He barked out a soft laugh. “For me or for you? I just can’t. I see how Rohan looks at you, and I know exactly how he feels. Unless you guys play by different rules or something, but even if you do, I think I need a little more time to adjust.” He urged me to stand and when I did he reached out and cupped my head in both his big, gentle hands and pulled me into a hungry kiss that lingered for several seconds. When he pulled away finally, he said, “Thank you so much for the thought. I am probably, no, definitely going to regret turning you down.”