by Ada Adams
“That’s a stupid dare,” Sebastian snapped. “What are you trying to accomplish? I’m not eleven anymore.”
“That doesn’t mean that the ghosts won’t still be there,” Razor teased. “Scared?”
“No. Just annoyed by your lack of creativity.”
Razor didn’t let up. “Because I’m such a great big brother, I’ll throw in Dagger Girl over here to keep you company.”
My eyes widened. “Hey! I’m not part of this dare. I had my turn at humiliation.”
“What? Are you scared of Old Lady McDougal too?” Razor challenged.
“Of course not,” I shot back.
But that didn’t mean that I wasn’t scared of other things. Like spending the night with Sebastian. And, undoubtedly, Aurora. It was hard to rein in my impulses around Sebastian because of the blood bond that was still surging through us, but it was impossible to control Aurora. I didn’t want to take any chances.
“If you’re not scared, then you’ll accompany Seb,” Razor said. “Otherwise, I’ll have to change my dare to something a lot naughtier, and you can bet your favorite weapon that it’ll still include you.”
I rolled my eyes. “Fine. I’ll do it,” I said, relenting. Aurora hadn’t emerged for three whole weeks. I couldn’t keep running away from her for the rest of my life. As long as I was prepared to defend against her, Sebastian would be safe.
He’ll probably spend the entire night brooding in a corner anyway.
Before Sebastian and I set out for the McDougal barn, I cornered Lena. I had a plan for keeping Aurora at bay, and that involved learning how Lena successfully kept her twin from invading her mind. Unfortunately, before she would tell me, I first had to listen to a speech about how lucky I was that I was getting to spend the night in a drafty, old barn with Bast.
“How exactly do you and Sierra communicate?” I asked, fifteen torturous minutes later.
“It all happens on a mental level,” she explained. “But it’s not as involved as you’d think. I don’t see through her eyes. I don’t hear through her ears, nor can I feel the things she touches. I only have access to the thoughts in her mind, which sometimes translate into words and emotions.”
“But you can talk back to her?”
“Yes, by thinking about what I want to say. It’s like a mental conversation, I suppose. She’d hear the stuff I say out loud as well, but I usually opt for mental talk because I don’t want anyone to actually think that I’m nuts.”
“Can you uhh…alter her reality or anything like that?”
Lena laughed. “I wish! Only Born mindbenders can do that.”
“But if you could glamour…could you do it to your sister even when you weren’t standing near her?”
“I guess so. I mean, it would make sense. We have access to each other’s thoughts no matter where we are, so if I could glamour I would probably be able to do it to Sierra through our mind connection.”
“Unless she blocks you.”
“Right.”
“And how do you guys block each other?” I was desperate to know.
“I build a wall around my mind,” Lena divulged. “She can do the same to me.”
“How does it work?”
Lena shrugged. “I’ve never really given it much thought. When she does it to me, it kind of feels like hitting a physical barrier. There’s nothing I can do to get in.”
“Is there something specific you do to get into this state of mind?”
She thought for a moment. “It’s akin to meditating, I guess. I have to really, really want it, but I also need to be relaxed. It took everything in my power to keep her out of my head when we were younger, but now I can turn it on and off like a switch.” Her golden eyes narrowed. “Why are you asking all these questions, anyway? Trying to keep someone out of your head?”
You have no idea.
“Just curious,” I replied instead.
I was about to be locked in a creepy barn with Sebastian. The last person I needed haunting me was Aurora. I swore to not let her win. No matter what, she wasn’t going to take me over.
Not this time.
As the clock struck midnight, Sebastian, Razor, and I traversed the tall grass field toward the McDougal house. The barn was located on the periphery of the property; small and red, its wooden planks had withstood the test of weather and time.
Sebastian carefully scoped out the inside, ensuring that the old structure was still stable, while Razor and I hung back by the entryway. Seconds ticked away, bringing me closer to my imprisonment with Sebastian.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea for Sebastian and I to be alone with each other,” I told Razor, feeling like I was being forced to wear an itchy, woolen sweater.
“I’ve been keeping him away from you for weeks, D. Nothing bad has happened. I can’t take your guys’ tortured glances anymore,” he said. “It’s time you two do something about it.”
“This whole dare was your plan to get us together and lock us up in an enclosed space, wasn’t it?” I suddenly realized.
He winked. “I may even throw away the key.”
“But, Aurora—”
“Forget about Aurora,” he advised. “Look, I’m not asking you to marry him. Just talk things out. Tell him what you’ve told me. He’ll understand.”
How could he?
“This isn’t a good idea, Razor…”
“Why not?” he challenged. “There’s nothing better than a ghost story and some hay to rev up the libido.”
Eww. “That may be a problem,” I told him, remembering how we had acted in Sebastian’s room, at the pool, by the fountain—thanks to the stupid blood curse, we needed no help to…do that.
“Every time we’re alone, things happen,” I whispered, keeping out of Sebastian’s earshot. “Even if we don’t want them to, they still happen. I thought this blood thing was supposed to wear off by now, but I think it’s only growing stronger.”
“What blood thing?” Razor asked, perplexed.
“The blood attraction thing. We exchanged blood so now we can’t help ourselves when we’re around each other,” I reminded him. “Until this crazy connection wears off—”
Razor erupted in laughter. “Oh, that.”
“It’s not funny!” I chastised. “It’s a real problem.”
He cleared his throat and attempted to look serious. “You’re right. Tell me more about this problem.”
I looked down at my hands. “I don’t know. Whenever Sebastian and I are together, things get intense. The blood bond makes us act really….wild.”
Another boisterous laugh escaped his lips.
“Stop laughing!” I hissed angrily. “How long is this supposed to last?”
“I don’t know. Maybe forever.”
My jaw hit the floor. “What do you mean forever?”
He smirked. “Look, it’s true that your and Sebastian’s blood is compatible so that you can create a child, but there is no such thing as an attraction curse between a Born and her Made. I just made that up.”
“You did what?!”
“You wouldn’t admit that you liked my brother, so I thought I’d put you guys through a test. If you didn’t have any real feelings, I figured that nothing would happen. Obviously, if you’re this riled up, something did happen,” he announced proudly.
I was speechless.
“Don’t look so pouty, D. I gave you a free pass to…what was it you said? Oh, right. Act really wild.” He grinned, winking.
“I can’t believe you did that!” I scanned the area for sharp objects to hurl at him. In spite of all the hay surrounding the outside of the barn, there wasn’t a pitchfork in sight.
He smirked. “I can’t believe you fell for it!”
“So, there really was no magical cause for the way we behaved?” I was still trying to wrap my mind around Razor’s lie.
He shrugged. “Believe me, if there was a magical way to get close to you, I’d be the first one to buy that potion. But, alas
, my little brother seems to need no assistance from the occult.”
“No assistance in what?” Sebastian asked, exiting the barn.
“No assistance in being scared,” Razor teased.
“Whatever. Let’s just get this over with.” With that, Sebastian retreated into the building.
I began to follow him, but Razor pulled me back. “Just remember, you both acted the way you did for a reason. My little fib freed you to indulge in the feelings you have towards each other. If you don’t stop fighting them, you may lose out on something real.” A glimmer of genuine concern erupted from the dark gray depths of his eyes. “You’re always so focused on saving the world and everyone around you that you don’t even pay attention to your own needs.”
With that he was off, leaving me alone with Sebastian. As Razor’s parting words rang through my mind, the only thing I could think about was the fact that it had all been real. Everything. From the attraction Sebastian and I felt toward each other to the confession he had uttered that night at the pool. No longer being able to hide behind the pretense of the blood link, I had nothing external to blame. Pushing him away had been easy when I could tell myself that our feelings were just a result of a spell. Now there were no more excuses, and all I wanted to do was pull him back in.
The inside of the barn was cold and musty. According to Razor, the structure hadn’t housed animals since Mrs. McDougal passed away, but there was still a lingering smell of livestock trapped within its drafty walls.
“This should be fun,” Sebastian muttered, hopping on a tower of bales.
“Don’t worry, I checked for buckets of blood,” I joked. Climbing up the rafters to the landing just below the roof, I found a clean spot to set up camp. The straw beneath my body was surprisingly clean. “Considering that no one has owned this place for a long, long time, it’s pretty well-kept,” I pointed out.
“Kids come here to play,” Sebastian explained. “And teens to roll in the hay.”
“If Razor expects us to do that, he’s in for a big disappointment.”
Sebastian winced.
“What?” Surely, after everything that had transpired between us, he wouldn’t have expected me to jump at the opportunity.
“That nickname,” he said.
“Oh.” I relaxed. We were only a minute into our prison sentence, but so far things were going well. For once, I didn’t feel like we were teetering on dangerous territory. Talking about Razor would keep it that way. “What do you have against the nickname? I mean, aside from the fact that it sounds absolutely ridiculous?”
“That was his name before…” He looked away, grasping for the right word. “Everything,” he finally said.
Holding my breath in anticipation, I waited for him to elaborate.
“When he was younger, my brother used to live for trouble. He was especially proficient with knives. Vandalism, fights, danger.” He counted off the items on his fingers. “As Angel Creek’s renowned bad boy, he earned the nickname Razor. Things really spun out of control after he turned sixteen. Our parents were beside themselves with worry. Then he met Elle. Being the new girl in town, she had every guy my brother’s age clamoring for her attention. But she picked him.” There was a slight trace of pride in Sebastian’s voice.
“She saw the good in him and resolved to make him into a better person. Out of principle she refused to call him Razor, so slowly he shed the nickname and his wayward habits. By the time he was eighteen, he was Chris to us all. Elle had helped him mature and compelled him to face the future. Then she got really sick.” Sebastian’s eyes glistened with sadness. “The girl who had taught my brother to focus on the future, no longer had one of her own. Just like that. It took less than a month for us to lose her. Cancer,” he explained quietly.
No wonder one of Razor’s three “life rules” was to never fall in love.
“My brother was no longer Chris, but he didn’t revert back to Razor either. Instead, he asked us to call him Christopher and he threw himself into his studies. Losing Elle had burdened him with this intense desire to find a cure for everyone’s pain. In a few short years, he was one of the top doctoral students at his school. He left the country when I was seventeen and he became even more focused on his work. And then…I came along and ruined it all. So now, I guess he’s back to being Razor.”
“He seems to be on a good path, though,” I said.
“I noticed. That may be because of you.”
“Me?”
“I think you remind him of her,” he said.
“Elle?” I asked, stunned.
“She was a lot like you.” Sebastian smiled. “Kind and thoughtful, and definitely a bit of a tomboy. Even back then, she tried to get around wearing dresses. She was very down-to-earth, and also extremely stubborn. I think you guys would have gotten along well.”
Somewhere in the middle of his story, he had closed the distance between us. The air in the attic billowed with tension as he lowered his tall frame next to mine. Sitting side-by-side, our feet dangled from the plank, my sneakers barely reaching down to the middle of his calves.
“Although, she was a lot less guarded with her feelings,” he said. As his eyes flickered to my face, I knew that he was no longer talking about Elle. Now, more than ever, I regretted agreeing to Razor’s stupid dare. Wrapping my arms around my body, I ignored the silent meaning in his words. He leaned closer, his shoulder pressing tightly against mine.
“What are you running from, Dawn?”
He should have asked who I was running from.
Aurora.
Myself.
Him.
“Us?” he guessed, murmuring into my ear. His cool breath caressed the sensitive skin on my neck, propelling a velvety wave of ecstasy down the side of my body.
“It seems like whenever there is an us involved, tragedy follows,” I said, entwining my fingers in the fabric of my sweater.
Aurora had destroyed Sebastian. Losing Elle had transformed Razor. Lola had been infectious to Hunter. Brooke and Seth, Sophie and Charlotte—they had all collided into each other, changing the course of their destinies. Even my parents never got their happily-ever-after.
Sebastian untangled my hand from my sweater, gingerly lacing his long fingers through my much smaller ones. With his other hand, he brushed my chin, turning my face toward him. “What can I say to make you believe that it doesn’t have to be that way?”
“Tell me how it all ends,” I pleaded in a feathery whisper. Every scenario I ran through in my head pushed me further away from the idea that happiness was attainable.
He shook his head. “I can’t.” Gliding his thumb over my bottom lip, he said, “With you, I don’t foresee an end. But even if it came tomorrow, I wouldn’t regret today. I hope that you know that.”
I thought that he was going to lean in and kiss me, but he didn’t. Instead, he continued to caress my lips, his silver gaze locking me in place as if to say, Your turn.
My instinct was to pull back and run. I had spent so much time running away—fleeing from Aurora, Sebastian, and even myself—it had become a natural response to let fear get in the way of my strength. After all, it was only a matter of time before Aurora caught on to the warm feelings pulsating through me and emerged to, once again, deny me my chance at bliss. By allowing myself to fear the unknown, I was preparing for failure before the journey had even begun, but I didn’t know what else to do. Fleeing had become an innate response.
Mid-escape, I suddenly stopped.
No more running, I told myself.
You’re stronger than that. Stay and fight.
My first task was to tackle Aurora. My mind hummed with excitement and I felt a surge of optimism as a renewed sense of power vibrated throughout my body. If Lena could force her twin out of her thoughts, then I could do the same with my own mind parasite. I could protect myself from her attacks. More importantly, I could prevent her from hurting Sebastian.
Cautiously, I focused on weaving an unbreak
able shield around my thoughts. Following Lena’s advice, I relaxed into the euphoria brought on by the anticipation of the impending silence. Searching my mind, I located the fragile crevices Aurora had carved within me. With an imaginary needle and thread, I stitched the cracks together, permanently shutting her out. I could almost hear the lock snap into place. At last, my thoughts were once again mine and mine alone. No one was invading them.
Except maybe Sebastian, I realized, as my attention shifted back to him.
“What are you doing?” he whispered, unnerved by my stillness.
I smiled. “Kicking fear’s butt.”
Pushing past his hand, I pressed my lips against his. My kiss was tentative, testing out his response, but when his hand slid to the back of my neck, tugging me tighter, tearing apart the distance between us, I parted my lips, letting him in. A low growl escaped his throat as his other hand gripped my waist; a strong, solid clutch right above the curve of my hip. He gently guided my leg across his lap, shifting me so that I sat straddling him, my back facing the empty space between the attic rafters and the ground below. Fully trusting him to keep me from plummeting down, I glided my hands to the back of his neck, twisting them through his long curls, tugging and pulling in rhythm to his kisses.
“If you need any more help kicking fear’s butt,” he murmured against my lips, “just let me know.”
“I might,” I admitted sincerely. My battle against Aurora wasn't over, but perhaps it was time that I finally let in an ally. And right now the only ally I wanted was Sebastian.
I relaxed into him, pressing against the firm muscles of his chest, losing myself in the crash of his heartbeat, shivering under the ragged gasps of air that escaped his mouth as he trailed his lips along my neck and collarbone. My skin melted away under his touch.
This was no blood attraction spell.
Just us.
Real.
Raw.