by London Casey
“How?” Eden whispered. “Just…”
“After I left the hospital, Ripper had me in an apartment. He didn’t want me back until I looked pre-baby. He and Griffin had some kind of fight about guns. He accused Griffin of getting too close to me. Of course, I couldn’t have sex for a while after having a baby, right? But Ripper just wouldn’t have it. So Griffin took off again. That began a really long and lonely road for me. I only saw Griffin when it was necessary through the club. We never talked. I never knew much about you. He managed to pull me aside to tell me about what happened to your parents. He assured me you were in good hands again. He watched over you, Eden. But then a couple years ago he arranged for us to be alone. The years had beaten me as bad as Ripper. I drank, smoked, did things to my body that I should have never done. I hated myself, Eden. Maybe I still do. But knowing you’re here and you’re safe, I feel relieved in it all.”
Jenn squeezed Eden’s hand and tears filled her eyes again.
“I don’t know what to say right now,” Eden said.
“You don’t have to say anything. It was a couple years ago. Ripper was on a run. Griffin heard about it and snuck away. I made up some bullshit story that my sister was in the hospital with a gall bladder issue. We were in the woods, in a private cabin, just me and him. It was the first time we were really alone like that in… like forever…”
Eden watched the way Jenn’s eyes glazed over and she looked away. A genuine smile crept across her face. She really loved Griffin and Griffin really loved her. So at least that was something Eden could take with her - her birth parents really did love each other. It was just the outlaw life that kept them apart. The life that kept them apart was the life that kept Eden and Trev together.
“I mean, I don’t have to tell you what we did, right?” Jenn asked.
“Again, gross,” Eden said.
They both laughed.
A tear fell from Jenn’s eye. “He was the only one who could do it for me. Even after all those years, he touched me like it was the first time. He made me feel alive and wanted. But I knew we weren’t together then just to roll around in the sheets. Gosh, look at me. I sound like a whore. In front of my daughter.”
“No. It’s kind of romantic. In a weird way. I just wish you two could have been together.”
“Me too,” Jenn said. “But I was claimed by Ripper. And Ripper would rather make me suffer in misery than just let me go. He fucked anything he wanted, but I wasn’t allowed to look at another man.”
“He sounds like an asshole,” Eden said.
“That’s exactly what he is. That’s why I’m here. But let me finish this first. We were in bed together. I know, I know - gross. We had to break apart. Somewhere in my heart I thought it could all work. We could keep sneaking around together. But Griffin looked at me and I just knew. I knew right then I’d never see him, touch him, taste him, ever again. I started to cry. He touched my jaw and told me he had something for me. He said he dreamed of giving me a ring and riding off into the sunset. He didn’t give me a ring. He gave me the letter to you.”
Eden gasped. “He… you…”
Jenn nodded. “He said that if he was to ever get killed he wanted me to send you the letter. Because then you’d go to the club and they’d protect you. I think on some level he thought by being alive it kept all enemies away from you. Maybe he thought Ripper knew the truth. I don’t know, Eden. I really don’t know. But he said it and I respected it. When I heard that he was killed, it destroyed me. I couldn’t show any emotion either. Think about that. The man I loved and I couldn’t even weep for his death. I sent the letter and waited. I figured news would have to push through the MC about you. But it never did. Until I saw you at Giovanni’s funeral. I could’ve collapsed…”
“I didn’t come for a year,” Eden said. “I didn’t know what to make out of it all. Then I was attacked. I worked at a tattoo parlor. The owner was shot in the head right in front of me. Then the guys came after me. They burned the letter. I managed to save the picture that you sent though. But the guys wanted me dead. So I came here and… then I found out my father was dead.”
Eden started to lose it. Jenn wrapped her arms around Eden and hugged her. It was the first time Eden got a hug from her birth mother. Eden hugged back and started to cry. Jenn started to cry.
Mother and daughter stood there, crying. For everything lost. For everything gained. All the anger Eden felt slowly washed away. She wasn’t sure if she loved her mother or not but the woman proved to be brave. Making such a difficult decision… and her father always protecting her…
The door to the apartment opened.
Eden saw Trev standing in the doorway. “Hey. I heard noise…”
“Just a good cry,” Jenn said.
Trev looked at Eden. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” Eden said.
Her mother leaned in. “The way he’s looking at you right now is the way your father always looked at me. Never let that go.”
Eden felt her body gush.
Trev entered the apartment and shut the door. “You two talk?”
“Yeah,” Jenn said. “She knows all I can really tell right now. I guess we have to move to the bad news.”
“The bad news?” Eden asked.
Trev ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah, beautiful. I’m sorry. There’s really bad news…”
__
twenty-one.
Eden started to shake as she rested in the corner nook of where the counters made an L shape. She wanted to hide there. Fall to her butt and shut her eyes. Wake up in a different time and a different place. But she still wanted Trev. She forever wanted Trev.
“It’s going to be okay,” Trev said. “I’m trying to be as open and as honest as I can with you, Eden. I hope you know that.”
Eden looked at her mother. “This is all true?”
“All of it,” Jenn said. “That’s why Ripper came after me. He started piecing things together and started swinging.”
“How does it work?” Eden asked. “Why would he believe you?”
“He’s desperate,” Trev said. “I give up my cut and go outlaw. I show up at his bar and offer myself. I make it clear that me and the Frelen charter had a falling out. Saw that I found out the truth about you, Eden, and that I wanted to kill you. They voted me out and told me I was their next target. I say things that only I would know about you, Eden. To play this right. Ripper will fall for it. His pride has been fucked from the day Griffin touched Jenn. He’ll let me in because I’m outlaw. I’m the one who could help him secure his deal with the O’Nuall family. His play is bigger than anything we can see right now. He wants to push down into Frelen and take control. That’s where I come in. I know everything about this town. The PD. The people. The club. The members. You.”
Eden shook her head. “No. Trev… he won’t believe you.” She looked at Jenn. “Right? He’s not that dumb. Look at how crazy he is.”
“He hates the setup,” Jenn said. “He’s gotten drunk so many times and slipped things to me. He’s tried to build crews outside the MC to attack you all. The thing with Giovanni… that wasn’t an Irish thing. That was an internal thing.”
“What?” Eden asked.
“We’re going to vote on it still,” Trev said. “But Jenn heard them arguing. Giovanni was trying to work the deal with Ripper. He wasn’t in all that deep though.”
“Ripper had been saying things about Miller,” Jenn said. “He was filling the guys heads with bad information. Every time there was a shooting, a fight, an attack, Ripper would point to it. Your war from a year ago was a big deal to Ripper. I know it’s been quiet around your charter…” Jenn looked at Trev. “Ripper has been making it clear that he’s been watching Miller and sees something bad on the horizon. He’s pulled reports that show people talking to the police about Back Down Devil MC. I can tell you this though, the men at that table are fiercely loyal to the cut. Not to the man behind the cut. I think they all know something is w
rong, they just don’t know where.”
“This is our shot,” Trev said. “To fix a problem. A problem that could end up with all of us dead if we don’t act. Beautiful, I think Ripper was the one who set up that attack on you. The tattoo shop. Having some of his other crew digging around for money.”
“How did he know about me?”
“Maybe he was on the look,” Trev said. “With Griffin gone. You didn’t show up at the club, did you?”
Eden shuddered. “No.”
“Don’t feel guilty, sweetie,” Jenn said. “You followed your heart when you needed to. That takes guts. You’re safe here and this can work.”
“Listen,” Trev said. “I go up there, running outlaw. I make it clear that Jenn came down to Frelen. That will piss him off. I can turn him in a second, Eden. I can twist him up. He’ll slip. He’ll fuck up. And then we have the truth and we can take action.”
“Action,” Eden said. “Your version of justice.”
“Exactly,” Trev said.
“You’re going to kill him.”
“There’s no other choice,” Jenn said. “Look what he did to me. This has been years of it.”
Eden looked right at Trev. “What if you get killed?”
Then there was silence. Nobody responded to the question.
Eden started to cry.
Bad enough she had been forced into this life, she now had to face the possibility of losing someone she loved.
Her mother went to her side and rubbed her back. “It’s what we all do, sweetie. We all know the risk of survival. I’m sorry it has to be this way.”
Trev came forward. He took Eden’s hand and kissed it. “I’m not going to get killed.”
“You can’t promise me that.”
“Of course I can’t. But I’m not going up there with that fucking thought in my head. And you’re not going to wait down here thinking the same. You’re going to spend time with Jenn, your mother. You’re going to wait for me. And I’m going to come back and this club is going to be on the right path again. No bullshit here. No bullshit up north.”
“Who’s going to run the club then?” Eden asked.
Trev smiled. He touched Eden’s cheek. “I don’t know and I don’t care. That’s up to Miller and Gaige to decide. Maybe he’ll move Gaige up north. Maybe he’ll give the patch to someone up in Daurian that’s worthy. Jasper, maybe. That’s not my problem. I promised Miller I would be on the front line for this thing.”
“Send someone else!” Eden cried out. “You’ve done enough.”
“Eden,” Jenn whispered.
“No,” Eden said. She broke away. “Fuck you. You’re not my mother. You abandoned me. You couldn’t even stand up for yourself!”
Eden ran from the kitchen, a fiery anger in her heart. She ran toward the bedroom and tried to slam the door. Trev was there, catching the door.
“Go away,” Eden said.
“That I won’t do,” Trev said.
“That’s exactly what you’re going to do. You’re leaving me.”
Trev stepped up behind Eden. He put his hands to her hips. His body touched hers. She was still angry, but his touch was soothing. Very soothing.
“I’m the only one who can do this,” Trev said. “I’ve been outlaw before. It makes sense. Everyone knows I’m a transplant. Everyone knows I’m a hot head. Anyone else it looks funny. With me, I can sell it. I will sell it. I’m doing this for the MC. For you and me, beautiful. I’m also doing it for your parents. Okay?”
Eden looked back at Trev. “Why?”
“Because if someone told me I couldn’t love you the way I want, I wouldn’t want to live. Yet that’s what happened to Griffin and Jenn. And they created life and had no real choice but to give you up to protect you. I want to avenge that feeling. I don’t believe for a second that Griffin was trying to hurt the club. I want to clear his name and I want Ripper to suffer for all he’s done.”
Trev slid a hand around to Eden’s stomach. She put her hand to his. “Trev, it’s so dangerous.”
“Everything in life is dangerous. Falling in love with you is dangerous. I’m not afraid of danger, beautiful. I’m not afraid of falling in love with you either. Your mother needs you right now.”
“I said some bad stuff to her.”
“So what? It’s just words. Prove your actions. That’s what I’m doing.” Trev kissed Eden. “I have to go to a meeting. Then I’ll be back.”
“Trev, when is this happening?”
Trev didn’t respond right away.
Eden shook her head and slowly turned around. “No. Don’t…”
“It has to be.”
“Tonight?”
“Ripper can’t have time to process anything. The story I tell has to be believable.”
“You’re leaving tonight.”
“Yes, beautiful. Tonight.”
Eden felt her heart twisting, crushing.
Trev walked her from the bedroom back to the kitchen. There waited Jenn with open arms.
“Come here, sweetie. Let Momma take care of you.”
Eden went to her mother and wept.
_
twenty-two.
Trev reached for Eden’s back and Jenn waved him off. Just go… she’ll be fine.
Jenn mouthed the words and then smiled.
Trev turned and left the apartment. He stood at the railing and looked across the entire lot. This was all supposed to be temporary. But it became home. Same thing with Eden. She was supposed to be temporary. But she became home.
As Trev walked the steps to go to the clubhouse, his heart pounded hard in his chest. He touched his chest and thought about the ink Eden had given him. Christ, she had given him so much more than just that.
For the first time ever, Trev was nervous about a mission… because now he had something to lose.
*
The table was solemn. Everyone understood the decision and understood the risk. More than that, Trev knew it was a hard thing for everyone to accept to put the seat back in risk of being empty again. Trev was prepared for death, even if he hated it now because of Eden. At the door to the conference room, that’s where all emotion and romance was stripped away. This was about business. The survival of the MC and the future of the MC.
“Jenn has made it very clear we have a problem,” Gaige said. “Ripper is working behind the MC. She’s heard conversations of guns, talks with the O’Nuall family, and she heard a confrontation between Ripper and Giovanni. It looks like Ripper took out his own guy and is pushing down on the Frelen charter.”
“Aye,” Shay said, raising his hand. “Not to go against anything we’re saying, but is it wise to take the words of a beaten up old lady?”
“Fuck, bro,” Erik said. “Do you get…”
“He’s right,” Miller said. “We’re not going to start navigating these waters with the words of an old lady.” Miller put a hand up as Trev was about to explode. “But we have a plan. And we have a vote to take.”
Miller gave a nod to Trev.
All eyes were on him.
“I’m going to give up my cut,” Trev said.
Everyone murmured.
“What are you talking about?” Shay asked.
“I’m going to give up my cut and head north. I can convince Ripper shit is bad here. He’s after this club. He doesn’t want Miller as President. He wants one big charter and he wants to run it through a deal with the O’Nuall family. Now, I don’t have proof of that. It’s all words. Shay and Miller bring up points about that with old ladies. But something bad is going to happen if we don’t act. I’ll go north and give everything Ripper wants. I’ll stand by him and watch as he makes the calls. I’ll see the proof.”
“Jesus Christ, brother,” Blaine said. “That’s sabotage. I mean, the risk of yourself…” Blaine looked at Miller. “This risk here for us. Trying to set up not just another brother but a charter President.”
“A President who has lost his mind,” Gaige said.
“Maybe he has the right,” Landon said. “Shit. Jenn got pregnant by Griffin. I mean, do we know what Ripper actually knows? He’s been living with that…”
“Griffin is dead,” Trev said. “Let’s not forget that. If his name is fucked in all this, then we deal with that later. If his name is clear, then he rests peacefully as is. This is about Ripper. Giovanni’s death doesn’t add up. There’s proof that he had a problem with Giovanni. The rest of his table is unsure of who to believe. This is our chance to figure it out.”
“And if Ripper is clear?” Erik asked. “I mean, that will put a target on us. Charter to charter. A war.”
“That’s a risk I’m going to take,” Miller said. “And if that risk causes a war and I’m wrong, then I will give up my patch. I’ll cut it off and hand it to my VP. Then you can vote on my fate. Reaper or outlaw. How’s that for fucking proof?”
The table went silent again.
“That’s not going to happen though,” Gaige said. “I’ve talked to Jasper. He’s convinced something is wrong.”
“Then let it be his problem,” Jace said.
“It’s our goddamn problem,” Miller said. “When he’s up there making this charter look bad. When he’s trying to turn the charter against its own club. And if he’s dealing with the Irish and he killed Giovanni…”
“We vote for the reaper right now,” Gaige said. “If Trev finds that Ripper has been dealing with the O’Nuall family and killed Giovanni, he meets the reaper.”
“We vote now,” Miller said. “Trev is leaving soon. Tonight.”
“Christ,” Blaine said. “Tonight, brother?”
“Has to look legit,” Trev said. “I make it look like that when Jenn showed up and I learned of who Eden was, I threw a fit. I took on Miller and Gaige and they stripped me, kicking me out. I have to sell this hard. I believe in this, guys. I’m willing to be there alone to prove this. To prove I deserve this seat. And, shit, this is my way of honoring Griffin.”
“I vote yes,” Gaige said.
“Yes,” Trev said.
“Okay,” Nate said.
“Fucking hell,” Shay said. “Aye. For the MC.”