by Liliana Hart
“Please, Cooper. I need your mouth on me.”
He lowered his head and flicked his tongue across her nipple before suckling it in to his mouth. She thrust her hips against him with every pulse of his mouth, and his cock was soaked with her juices. All he had to do was move her panties and he’d be inside her.
She whimpered as he lifted his mouth from one breast and moved it to the other. He could tell by the jerk of her hips and the mewls that escaped her lips that she was close to fulfillment.
“Please, please,” she begged. “I want you inside me.”
Cooper tried to get his brain back in functioning order. This wasn’t the time or the place to do this. Cade was going to be there any minute and he hadn’t brought any condoms with him tonight because he was supposed to be working. They needed to move this to his place fast. But first there was something he needed her to understand before he took her to bed. He didn’t want to leave any doubt in her mind what she was getting in to.
“Wait, Claire. Just a minute, baby.”
“Don’t stop. I’m so close,” she cried.
“Claire, open your eyes and look at me.” He waited until her glazed, feverish eyes met his. “You need to know something before this goes any further.”
Her chest was heaving, making the nipple ornaments quiver with anticipation of what was to come. The sight was a hell of a distraction to his already scattered mind.
“Is this confession time?” she asked. “Because there’s something I should probably tell you too. You know, before we do this.”
She slid against his shaft and he sucked in a breath at how good she felt against him. “Fine, baby, but let me get this out, okay? It’s hard to think straight with you in my arms.”
“Then hurry,” she said, laughing.
“Whatever happens between us, Claire, I want you to understand that it can never be anything serious. I don’t want any miscommunication or hurt feelings between us. I think it’s best to be honest about these things from the beginning.”
She stiffened in his arms, and he realized he was handling this all wrong. His lack of interest in a relationship wasn’t the type of thing he had to explain to his usual partners. But Claire was different. She wasn’t worldly. She was a small town librarian who was looking for a little fun, but would eventually settle down with a husband and have a couple of kids.
“I do want you,” he continued, trying to figure out how to make the words come out right. “You were right that it’s time for me to stop running. But I can’t offer you the type of relationship a woman like you would normally look for.”
“You mean you won’t,” she said, as the desire faded from her eyes and disappointment filled them. “I find it hard to believe that you can’t have the kind of relationship where two people commit fully to each other. But don’t worry, Cooper.” Her smile was bitter as she tried t reassure him. “I’m not here to try and tie you down. I’ll be completely satisfied with one night. Maybe it’ll be a disappointment to both of us and we can chalk it up to a failed experiment and just go back to Surrender, pretending it never happened. You’ve proven many times that it’s not impossible to avoid someone in a town with only three thousand people.”
“Claire…I’d like us to still be friends once we’ve gotten this all out of our system. I don’t want that to change. We’ve known each other forever. This is just a little detour in the road.”
He didn’t know what else to say or do. He’d told her the truth, but shame crept along his skin and he had the urge to apologize. He had the feeling that he’d crushed something very, very special, but he didn’t know how to fix it without compromising everything he believed in, and eventually deceiving her into thinking they would be living a life of happiness and children only to be left alone.
“Sure, Cooper. A detour. Whatever you say. Now let’s stop talking and get on with things. It’s getting cold in here.”
She kissed him again, but it wasn’t the same. This kiss lacked the heat of her others, the softness and desire—the urgent need. The spark was still there between them—the hardness between his legs would attest to that—but it was as if that spark had been doused by water and was slowly fizzling.
“Why don’t we take this back to my place?” he said, thinking the change of atmosphere might help her relax. “We’ll have more room and a soft bed. And plenty of condoms.”
“I’m on birth control.”
“That’s good, but I’ve never had sex without a condom, and I don’t plan to start now.” His decision to never have children insured that he always remember to suit up. Because of his feelings toward the matter, he’d never even been tempted to feel the inside of a woman flesh to flesh. Some things couldn’t be taken on chance.
“Your place. Sure,” she said, though her voice was robotic.
Claire got off his lap and adjusted her clothing. She kept her gaze diverted and her movements were quick and jerky. He was just about to ask her what was wrong when a knock sounded at the door. Cooper didn’t know whether to curse Cade’s timing or thank him.
He turned to look at Claire one more time before answering the door. Her lips were swollen and red and she looked like she’d been well and thoroughly ravished. But it was her eyes that haunted him. They held nothing but emptiness.
Chapter Three
Claire felt frozen inside.
She’d known from the moment she’d set eyes on Cooper that he was supposed to be hers. And when an innocent crush had matured into the love only a woman knows, she knew it was time to act. She’d dated other men, but she’d never given them her body. Her body belonged to Cooper.
She hadn’t come here tonight expecting Cooper to declare his love and pledge himself forever. But she hadn’t expected him to take everything that she had to give him—the love and the passion she’d held inside for so long—and tear it to shreds with a few careless words. He would accept her body, but nothing else she had to offer. No genuine affection. Just sex.
The childhood hopes she’d once dreamed had been turned to dust, as if they’d never existed. If Cooper only wanted her body then that’s what she’d give him. He’d been the one she’d been saving it for after all. And once he ridded her of her pesky virginity and she’d slaked him from her system, she’d be free to get on with her life and find a chance at happiness elsewhere. And she very much wanted happiness—she didn’t have to be married or have children like her friends were starting to do. All she wanted was the chance for something special. She wanted the companionship. The laughter. And eventually that might turn to love. But Cooper had made it very clear that she wouldn’t find any of those things with him.
Fine. She was a big girl now, and she could play this game. Just sex.
Cooper turned and gave her one last, worried look, and she got control of her composure. She could be just as cold as he was for the time being. She’d save her pity tears for the comfort of her own home.
Cooper opened the door just as the man on the other side was lifting his fist to knock again. She recognized him immediately, though she’d been thrown off by his long hair. The last time she’d seen him it had been buzzed close to the scalp. The tattoo was also new. Or maybe she’d just never seen him without his shirt off. The MacKenzies always seemed to have their shirts off in the summer, so she couldn’t remember exactly. An intricate design was inked over the left side of his chest and over his shoulder, and it ended at the bulging bicep of his left arm. He was huge. And he looked like a complete reprobate at the moment, though she knew he was anything but.
“Hello, Cade. I didn’t realize Club Dominique was where the MacKenzies had started having their family reunions.”
“It’s good to see you again, Claire.”
“I didn’t realize you two were on a first name basis,” Cooper said, narrowing his eyes as his cousin.
“Unlike you,” she said, “The other MacKenzies I see in town don’t run in the opposite direction whenever I walk down the street. And since Cade’s b
een spending the summers in Surrender since he was a kid, I actually know him pretty well. And just so there’s no further confusion, your sisters-in-law are some of my closest friends, and your brother is my personal physician.”
Cooper frowned. It was obvious by the look on his face he hadn’t been aware of those facts.
Cade coughed to fill the awkward silence. “I apologize for interrupting your evening, but I needed to speak to both of you. That’s why I told Cooper to bring you in here.”
Claire flinched as if she’d been slapped, and she couldn’t bring herself to meet Cooper’s gaze. So he hadn’t really wanted her after all. Sure he’d seen her and singled her out, but only because he’d been given orders. Cooper must have thought she was a complete idiot. To think the desire in his eyes had only been for her. She’d just been the one to fall into his path.
Despite her idiocy at relationships, she was smart enough to know something big was going on. She knew Cade worked for the DEA, and it was clear by Cooper’s lack of surprise at seeing him that he was in on the plan. Obviously, there was some kind of operation going on in the club that she’d stepped in the middle of, and she had a feeling it had everything to do with the Neanderthal she’d been sitting on earlier.
God, she was such a fool. To think she could ever be the kind of women who could catch and keep Cooper MacKenzie for good was almost laughable. She stared at Cooper until he flinched at her accusatory stare.
“You’re not interrupting anything,” she said, turning back to Cade. “I was just on my way out. What do you need from me, Cade.”
“Did you overhear any of Rafael Morda’s conversation while you were…ah…”
“Sitting on his lap?” Claire asked. “I didn’t realize that was the man’s name. He didn’t bother to introduce himself when he dragged me there.”
She ran her fingers through her hair in disgust. “I only heard parts of their conversation,” she continued. “It was hard to hear because of the music, and they kept switching from Spanish to English to French, so it was hard to keep up.”
“Can you speak Spanish?” Cade asked.
“Sure. And French. As well as Italian and a little German. I was a linguistics minor in college. They men were obviously talking about some type of business deal, but they never mentioned anything specific, so I didn’t know what the merchandise they kept referring to was. I didn’t hear where the shipment was coming from, but they’re taking the mountain pass across the border into Rollinstown to deliver it. From what I gathered, the shipment has already been rerouted because this club had been compromised, so it should reach its destination by dawn.”
“Shit,” Cade said, kicking at the leg of the chair as he paced back and forth across the tiny room. “I need to find out who leaked our position to Morda. We’ve been here three fucking years and it’s all just going to go up in smoke. It had to be someone on the team.”
“One of the men was using while he was talking to Morda,” Claire said. “You might be able to find something if you shut down the club and did a search.”
Cooper told him about the club closing at midnight, and they waited while Cade called in another team to raid the club just after eleven.
“What do you want to do, Cade?” Cooper asked when he got off the phone. “We can probably beat them to the mountain pass if we leave now and take the back roads.”
“But who do I take with us? I don’t know who I can trust anymore.”
“Well, there’s me and you,” Cooper said. “And if there’s someone else you can trust your life with we’ll add them to the mix. We’ve been hunting in those mountains a million times.”
“Are you crazy?” Claire asked, anger vibrating from every pore in her body. “The two of you are going to try and intercept a shipment of drugs by yourselves? These are professional bad guys. They’re not going to go down without a fight.”
“Well, we’re professional good guys, honey. We can’t let them get across the border with those drugs. Think of how many thousands of lives could be affected.”
“We can confiscate the shipment,” Cade said, “But that still doesn’t give us Morda. It’s all hearsay and reasonable doubt at this point. And it’s obvious that our cover at this club is blown. Maybe we’ll get lucky when the raid team gets here, but I doubt it. I’m going to have to start the whole damned operation over from scratch. With a new team.”
“Is there anything else you need from me, Cade?” Claire asked, wondering what the hell had just happened to her night. It was completely surreal. All she’d wanted was a night of completely amazing sex with Cooper MacKenzie and a chance to be a little bad for once in her boring life.
“No, you’ve been a big help, Claire. Would you mind if I sent one of my agents to take a formal statement from you sometime tomorrow? You might remember something else by then.”
“Sure, now if you’ll both excuse me, I think I’ll head back to Surrender.”
“I’ll walk you to your car,” Cooper said.
“I know the way,” she said and pasted an empty smile on her face. “Don’t trouble yourself.”
She opened the door and stepped into the red lit hallway. The club was still hopping on the main floor, but the hallway was empty.
“Dammit, Claire, you know we have things to talk about. I saw the look on your face in there. There’s no point in trying to avoid me.” He grabbed her hand to keep her from walking away. Damned stubborn woman.
“I’m not going to be able to follow you back to my place tonight. I need to help Cade here. But there’s a key under my mat and you can make yourself at home. We’ll talk as soon as I get back and get things straightened out. Things aren’t always like they seem. We’ll get everything straightened out and then take up where we left off.”
She looked at him with wide-eyed amazement. He really didn’t get it. As far as he was concerned this was business as usual. He was living his entire life by staying detached from everyone but his immediate family. It was just a revolving door of nameless women and forgettable pleasure.
“Cooper,” said, shaking her head sadly at the shame of it all. “Let’s just call it what it is and let it go. I think we both had different expectations of how things would be before I came here, and before you decided I’d just as good of a fuck as the person standing next to me. But unfortunately I’ve recently discovered something about myself—as in the last twenty minutes or so. It’s been a hell of an eye opener, and I completely took it for granted before.”
“You’re attitude is starting to piss me off, Claire.”
“Cooper, if you had your gun on you I might take it from you and shoot you in the foot. Shut up and listen, please.” She smiled sweetly, though the anger was obvious in her eyes. “Sex should mean something. It should be more than a quick grope in a closet with someone who doesn’t give a damn one way or the other about you. Yes, it should be satisfying. It should be dirty or sweet or standing up or lying down. The how doesn’t matter. But the why sure as fuck does.”
The growl that came from his throat didn’t intimidate her. If anything, it gave her the courage to keep going.
“This was a mistake all around. I know it was my fault for instigating it, so I apologize for inconveniencing you and getting in the way of whatever you guys are doing here.”
She pulled her hand from his grasp.
“I warned you that you wouldn’t like what I wanted from you, but you said I’d never know unless I told you. I can’t change who I am, Claire.”
“No one with a soul or an ounce of self-respect would like what you wanted from me. And if that’s a rule you’re determined to live by then I’m sure as hell not going to try and change you. There’s a lot I can take from you, Cooper, and there were a lot of things I was willing to try, but I won’t sacrifice myself on the altar of your illusions any longer. It’s fine for you to get what you want, but I deserve to get something of what I want as well. It can’t all be one sided.”
Disappointment weighed like
lead around her shoulders, and all of a sudden she was just so damned tired. The fight went out of her on an exhalation of breath, and her shoulders slumped in defeat.
“Let me have what’s left of my pride and just let it go, Cooper. There’s no need to try and talk things out so you can try and justify your decisions to yourself.”
He moved closer so he towered above her. “Whatever this is between us isn’t just going to go away.”
“I know that,” she said softly. “But just like with anything, if you ignore it long enough, you can pretend it never existed in the first place. I’ll see you around, Cooper.”
She turned and made it to the safety of her car before the tears began to fall. She didn’t realize until she’d gotten home that she still wore the collar Cooper had placed around her neck. She had no idea how she was going to get it off.
Chapter Four
Leave me what’s left of my pride…
Those words haunted Cooper all through the night, and they distracted him while Cade put a small team of four men together to intercept the shipment of drugs Morda was sending into Canada.
They’d achieved their goal of arresting the men traveling with the shipment—though Cade had taken a bullet to the hand and shoulder, and Cooper had one come close enough to his ribs to leave a burn mark across his skin.
But just like Cade had feared, they hadn’t caught the big fish. The men in the truck were just worker bees, and none of them could give the DEA Rafael Morda. The raid on Club Dominique hadn’t faired much better. They’d confiscated enough drugs to shut the club down for a while, but it was still just a small part of the picture.