Dresden files:Side jobs (dresden files:short stories)

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Dresden files:Side jobs (dresden files:short stories) Page 10

by Jim Butcher


  "Get out!" I screamed at the bistro. "Get out of here, people! Get the hell out now!"

  While I screamed, Drulinda slammed my brother's back into a metal security grate so hard that it left a broad smear of his pale red blood on its bars.

  People started hurrying out of the bistro, running for the parking lot.

  Drulinda looked over her shoulder and let out another hissing squall of rage. At this opening, Thomas managed to get a grip on her arm, set his feet, and swing her into the wall, sending cracks streaking through the concrete. On the rebound, he swung her up and around and then down, smashing her down onto the floor, then up from that and into a security mesh again, crushing tile and bending metal with every impact.

  I heard a scream and looked up to see Ennui fall from her impossibly high black heels in her tiny, tight black dress, as she tried to flee the bistro.

  A horribly disfigured hand had reached out from the rubble over the crushed vampire, and now it held her.

  I ran for the girl as my brother laid into Drulinda. My left arm wasn't talking to me, and I fumbled the second canister out of my left jacket pocket with my right arm, then dumped garlic over the outstretched vampire's hand.

  It began smoking and spasming. Ennui screamed as the crushing grip broke her ankle. I stood up in frustration and started stomping down on the vampire's arm. Supernaturally strong it might be, but its bones were made of bone, and it couldn't maintain its grip on the girl without them.

  It took a lot of stomping, but I was finally able to pull the girl free. I tried to get Ennui to her feet, but her weight came down on her broken ankle, and from there it came down on my wounded shoulder. I went down to one knee, and it was all I could do not to fall.

  I almost didn't notice when my brother flew through the air just over my head, smashed out what had to be the last remaining pane of glass at the mall entrance, and landed limply in the parking lot.

  I felt Drulinda's presence coming up behind me.

  The vampire let out a dusty laugh. "I thought it was just some poor pretty boy to play with. Silly me."

  I fumbled with the canister for a second, and then whirled, flinging its contents at Drulinda in a slewing arc.

  The vampire blurred to one side, dodging the garlic with ease. She looked battered and was covered with dust. Her undead flesh was approximately the consistency of wood, and so it wasn't cut and damaged so much as chipped and crushed. Her clothes were torn and ruined-and none of that mattered. She was just as functional and just as deadly as she had been before the fight.

  I dropped the canister and drew forth my pentacle amulet, lifting it as a talisman against her.

  The old bit with the crucifix works on the Black Court-but it isn't purely about Christianity. They are repelled not by the holy symbol itself, but by the faith of the one holding it up against them. I'd seen vampires repulsed by crosses, crucifixes, strips of paper written with holy symbols by a Shinto priest-once even a Star of David.

  Me, I used the pentacle, because that was what I believed in. The five-pointed star, to me, represented the five elements of earth, air, water, fire, and spirit, bound within the solid circle of mortal will. I believed that magic was a force intended to be used to create, to protect, and to preserve. I believed that magic was a gift that had to be used responsibly and wisely-and that it especially had to be used against creatures like Drulinda, against literal, personified evil, to protect those who couldn't protect themselves. That was what I thought, and I'd spent my life acting in accordance with it.

  I believed.

  Pale blue light began to spill from the symbol-and Drulinda stopped with a hiss of sudden rage.

  "You," she said after a few seconds. "I have heard of you. The wizard. Dresden."

  I nodded slowly. Behind her, the fire from my earlier spell was spreading. The power was out, and I had no doubt that Drulinda and her former security-guard lackeys had disabled the alarms. It wouldn't take long for a fire to go insane in this place, once it got its teeth sunk in. We needed to get out.

  "Go," I mumbled at Ennui.

  She sobbed and started crawling for the exit, while I held Drulinda off with the amulet.

  The vampire stared steadily at me for a second, her eyes all milky white, corpse cataracts glinting in the reflected light of the fire. Then she smiled and moved.

  She was just too damn fast. I tried to turn to keep up with her, but by the time I did, Ennui screamed, and Drulinda had seized her hair and dragged her back, out of the immediate circle of light cast by the amulet.

  She lifted the struggling girl with ease, so that I could see her mascara-streaked face. "Wizard," Drulinda said. Ennui had been cut by flying glass or the fall at some point, and some blood had streaked out of her slicked-back hair, over her ear, and down one side of her throat. The vampire leaned in, extending a tongue like a strip of beef jerky, and licked blood from the girl's skin. "You can hide behind your light. But you can't save her."

  I ground my teeth and said nothing.

  "But your death will profit me, grant me standing with others of my kind. The feared and vaunted Wizard Dresden." She bared yellowed teeth in a smile. "So I offer you this bargain. Throw away the amulet. I will let the girl go. You have my word." She leaned her teeth in close and brushed them over the girl's neck. "Otherwise… Well, all of my new friends are gone. I'll have to make more."

  That made me shudder. Dying was one thing. Dying and being made into one of those…

  I lowered the amulet. I hesitated for a second, and then dropped it.

  Drulinda let out a low, eager sound and tossed Ennui aside like an empty candy wrapper. Then she was on me, letting out rasping giggles, for God's sake, pressing me down. "I can smell your fear, Wizard," she rasped. "I think I'm going to enjoy this."

  She leaned closer, slowly, as she bared her teeth, her face only inches from mine.

  Which was where I wanted her to be.

  I reared up my head and spat out a gooey mouthful of powdered garlic directly into those cataract eyes.

  Drulinda let out a scream, bounding away in a violent rush, clawing at her eyes with her fingers-and getting them burned, too. She thrashed in wild agony, swinging randomly at anything she touched or bumped into, tearing great, gaping gashes in metal fences, smashing holes in concrete walls.

  "Couple words of advice," I growled, my mouth burning with the remains of the garlic I'd stuffed it with as she'd come sneaking up on me. "First, anytime I'm not shooting my mouth off to a cliched, two-bit creature of the night like you, it's because I'm up to something."

  Drulinda howled more and rushed toward me-tripping on some rubble and sprawling on the ground, only to rush about on all fours like some kind of ungainly, horrible insect.

  I checked behind me. Ennui was already out, and Thomas was beginning to stir, maybe roused by the snow now falling on him. I turned back to the blinded, pain-maddened vampire. We were the only ones left in that wing of the mall.

  "Second," I spat, "never touch my brother on his fucking birthday."

  I reached for my will, lifted my hand, and snarled, "Fuego!"

  Fire roared out to eagerly engulf the vampire.

  What the hell. The building was burning down, anyway. "FREAKING AMATEUR VILLAINS," I muttered, glowering down at the splatters on my car.

  Thomas leaned against it with one hand pressed to his head, a grimace of pain on his face. "You okay?"

  I waved my left arm a little. "Feeling's coming back. I'll have Butters check me out later. Thanks for loaning Molly your car."

  "Least I could do. Let her drive Sarah and Ennui to the hospital." He squinted at the rising smoke from the mall. "Think the whole thing will go?"

  "Nah," I said. "This wing, maybe. They'll get here before too much more goes up. Keef and his folk should be all right."

  My brother grunted. "How are they going to explain this one?"

  "Who knows," I said. "Meteor, maybe. Smashed holes in the roof, crushed some poor security guard, set t
he place on fire."

  "My vote is for terrorists," Thomas said. "Terrorists are real popular these days." He shook his head. "But I meant the larpers, not the cops."

  "Oh," I said. "Probably, they won't talk to anyone about what they saw. Afraid people would think they were crazy."

  "And they would," Thomas said.

  "And they would," I agreed. "Come tomorrow, it will seem very unreal. A few months from now, they'll wonder if they didn't imagine some of it or if there wasn't some kind of gas leak or something that made them hallucinate. Give it a few more years, and they'll remember that Drulinda and some rough-looking types showed up to give them a hard time. They drove a car through the front of the mall. Maybe they were crazy people dressed in costumes who had been to a few too many larps themselves." I shook my head. "It's human nature to try to understand and explain everything. The world is less scary that way. But I don't think they'll be in any danger, really. No more so than anyone else."

  "That's good," Thomas said quietly. "I guess."

  "It's the way it is." In the distance, sirens were starting up and coming closer. I grunted and said, "We'd better go."

  "Yeah."

  We got into the Beetle. I started it up, and we headed out. I left the lights off-no sense attracting attention.

  "You going to be all right?" I asked him.

  He nodded. "Take me a few days to get enough back into me to feel normal, but"-he shrugged-"I'll make it."

  "Thanks for the backup," I said.

  "Kicked their freaky asses," he said, and held out his fist.

  I rapped my knuckles lightly against it.

  "Nice signal. The birthday present."

  "I figured you'd get it," I said. Then I frowned. "Crap," I said. "Your present."

  "You didn't remember to bring it?"

  "I was a little busy," I said.

  He was quiet for a minute. Then he asked, "What was it?"

  "Rock'em Sock'em Robots," I said.

  He blinked at me. "What?"

  I repeated myself. "The little plastic robots you make fight."

  "I know what they are, Harry," he responded. "I'm trying to figure out why you'd give me them."

  I pursed my lips for a minute. Then I said, "Right after my dad died, they put me in an orphanage. It was Christmastime. On television, they had commercials for Rock'em Sock'em Robots. Two kids playing with them, you know? Two brothers." I shrugged. "That was a year when I really, really wanted to give those stupid plastic robots to my brother."

  "Because it would mean you weren't alone," Thomas said quietly.

  "Yeah," I said. "Sorry I forgot them. And happy birthday."

  He glanced back at the burning mall. "Well," my brother said, "I suppose it's the thought that counts."

  HEOROT

  – from My Big Fat Supernatural Honeymoon, edited by P. N. Elrod Takes place between White Night and Small Favor

  Once more, Pat invited me to come play at her literary club-house, and once more, I cheerfully agreed.

  What can I say? I fear change.

  The last anthology's theme had been weddings, and this one was the logical sequel-honeymoons. Research into the etymology of "honeymoon" led me back to its roots in Scandinavia and in the British Isles, where a newly wed bride and groom would depart their village and remain in solitude for a lunar month, while being well provided with mead (which is made from honey).

  I think the idea was to establish beyond a reasonable doubt that any child conceived in that time was the legitimate heir of the groom. Or maybe it was just to get a pretty young bride liquored up and wild for a month-Viking Girls Gone Wild, as it were.

  I have no idea if the information I found, mostly on the Internet, was academically accurate. For my purposes, that wasn't nearly as important as finding a solid inspiration. So, from newlyweds, mead, and Norse-Scandinavian backgrounds, I developed a story using everything from the Dresden Files' story line that had the flimsiest of connections to those base ideas.

  I put them all together, plopped Harry down in the middle of it, and gleefully watched as it caught fire. I was sitting in my office, sorting through my bills, when Mac called and said, "I need your help." It was the first time I'd heard him use four whole words all together like that.

  "Okay," I said. "Where?" I'd out-tersed him-another first.

  "Loon Island Pub," Mac said. "Wrigleyville."

  "On the way." I hung up, stood up, put on my black leather duster, and said to my dog, "We're on the job."

  My dog, Mouse, who outweighs most European cars, bounced up eagerly from where he had been dozing near my office's single heating vent. He shook out his thick grey fur, especially the shaggy, almost leonine ruff growing heavy on his neck and shoulders, and we set out to help a friend.

  October had brought in more rain and more cold than usual, and that day we had both, plus wind. I found parking for my battered old Volkswagen Bug, hunched my shoulders under my leather duster, and walked north along Clark, into the wind, Mouse keeping pace at my side.

  Loon Island Pub was in sight of Wrigley Field, and a popular hang-out before and after games. Bigger than most such businesses, it could host several hundred people throughout its various rooms and levels. Outside, large posters had been plastered to the brick siding of the building. Though the posters were soaked with rain, you could still read CHICAGO BEER ASSOCIATION and NIGHT OF THE LIVING BREWS, followed by an announcement of a home-brewed beer festival and competition, with today's date on it. There was a lot of foot traffic in and out.

  "Aha," I told Mouse. "Explains why Mac is here, instead of at his own place. He's finally unleashed the new dark on the unsuspecting public."

  Mouse glanced up at me rather reproachfully from under his shaggy brows; then he lowered his head, sighed, and continued plodding against the rain until we gained the pub. Mac was waiting for us at the front door. He was a sinewy, bald man dressed in dark slacks and a white shirt, somewhere between the age of thirty and fifty. He had a very average, unremarkable face, one that usually wore a steady expression of patience and contemplation.

  Today, though, that expression was what I could only describe as grim.

  I came in out of the rain, and passed off my six-foot oak staff to Mac to hold for me as I shrugged out of my duster. I shook the garment thoroughly, sending raindrops sheeting from it, and promptly put it back on.

  Mac runs the pub where the supernatural community of Chicago does most of its hanging out. His place has seen more than its share of paranormal nasties, and if Mac looked that worried, I wanted the spell-reinforced leather of the duster between my tender skin and the source of his concern. I took the staff back from Mac, who nodded to me and then crouched down to Mouse, who had gravely offered a paw to shake. Mac shook, ruffled Mouse's ears, and said, "Missing girl."

  I nodded, scarcely noticing the odd looks I was getting from several of the people inside. That was par for the course. "What do we know?"

  "Husband," Mac said. He jerked his head at me, and I followed him deeper into the pub. Mouse stayed pressed against my side, his tail wagging in a friendly fashion. I suspected the gesture was an affectation. Mouse is an awful lot of dog, and people get nervous if he doesn't act overtly friendly.

  Mac led me through a couple of rooms where each table and booth had been claimed by a different brewer. Homemade signs bearing a gratuitous number of exclamation points touted the various concoctions, except for the one Mac stopped at. There, a cardstock table tent was neatly lettered, simply reading MCANALLY'S DARK.

  At the booth next to Mac's, a young man, good-looking in a reedy, librarianesque kind of way, was talking to a police officer while wringing his hands.

  "But you don't get it," the young man said. "She wouldn't just leave. Not today. We start our honeymoon tonight."

  The cop, a stocky, balding fellow whose nose was perhaps more red than warranted by the weather outside, shook his head. "Sir, I'm sorry, but she's been gone for what? An hour or two? We don't even start
to look until twenty-four hours have passed."

  "She wouldn't just leave," the young man half shouted.

  "Look, kid," the cop said. "It wouldn't be the first time some guy's new wife panicked and ran off. You want my advice? Start calling up her old boyfriends."

  "But-"

  The cop thumped a finger into the young man's chest. "Get over it, buddy. Come back in twenty-four hours." He turned to walk away from the young man and almost bumped into me. He took a step back and scowled up at me. "You want something?"

  "Just basking in the glow of your compassion, Officer," I replied.

  His face darkened into a scowl, but before he could take a deep breath and start throwing his weight around, Mac pushed a mug of his dark ale into the cop's hand. The cop slugged it back immediately. He swished the last gulp around in his mouth, purely for form, and then tossed the mug back at McAnally, belched, and went on his way.

  "Mr. McAnally," the young man said, turning to Mac. "Thank goodness. I still haven't seen her." He looked at me. "Is this him?"

  Mac nodded.

  I stuck out my hand. "Harry Dresden."

  "Roger Braddock," the anxious young man said. "Someone has abducted my wife."

  He gripped too hard, and his fingers were cold and a little clammy. I wasn't sure what was going on here, but Braddock was genuinely afraid. "Abducted her? Did you see it happen?"

  "Well," he said, "no. Not really. No one did. But she wouldn't just walk out. Not today. We got married this morning, and we're leaving on our honeymoon tonight, soon as the festival is over."

  I arched an eyebrow. "You put your honeymoon on hold to go to a beer festival?"

  "I'm opening my own place," Braddock said. "Mr. McAnally has been giving me advice. Sort of mentoring me. This was… I mean, I've been here every year, and it's only once a year, and the prestige from a win is… The networking and…" His voice trailed off as he looked around.

  Yeah. The looming specter of sudden loss has a way of making you reevaluate things. Sometimes it's tough to know what's really important until you realize it might be gone.

 

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