I open my mouth to interject, but Ayd cuts me off with a penetrating stare.
Dev’s jaw tenses, pulsing in and out, his gaze bouncing between us. Slowly, he nods. Gripping the straps of his bag, he takes off, his long strides echoing through the eerily quiet hallway. Mariah chews anxiously on the corner of her lip. “You go ahead,” I tell her. “I’m going to ride with Ayd.”
She gives me a quick one-armed hug. “Okay. Call me later.”
We walk in silence to Ayd’s Jeep, and my emotions are ricocheting all over the place. Ayden thrusts the engine into gear and the car glides smoothly out onto the road. “I think you were a little harsh,” I admit, breaking the silence first.
“Was I?” he hisses.
“Yes.”
He snorts. “Is this the part where you waltz into his arms now he’s a free agent again?”
My spine stiffens. “Excuse me?” I turn the full strength of my glare on him. “That is not what I meant and you know it. I’m with you, and I’ve no plans to change that. I just think we could all try to be friends again now.”
“Grow up, Lina.”
His tone and his words piss me off. “Me grow up? How about you give yourself that little pep talk.”
“Have you forgotten what he did to you?” I fold my arms across my chest and stare out the window. “Well, have you?” he demands again.
“Of course, I haven’t,” I retort.
“Good. Because you’d do well to remember that Devin is on a one-way path to nothing, and I’m not letting him take you down with him.”
“How can you talk about him like that?” I swivel in my seat, drilling a hole in the side of his face as I speak. “And you don’t get to make decisions for me. You’re my boyfriend, not my freaking father.”
“You’re fucking unbelievable, do you know that?” He turns his head, ensuring I see the full extent of his disappointment. “I actually thought you loved me, but I’ve only ever been the backup plan.”
“That’s not fair,” I cry out. “I do love you, and you weren’t some consolation prize, so stop making out like you are.”
“If that’s true, then why has anything changed just because he tossed Becky aside?”
My protest withers up and dies. Ayden’s right. This doesn’t change the past or eradicate how much Devin has hurt me.
Devin breaking up with her changes absolutely nothing.
Another week passes by, and another wall has gone up between Ayden and me. Devin is like the invisible obstacle in our path. That and whatever Ayden is keeping from me. For the first time in forever, he fails to turn up Saturday night after work to pick me up, and his cell is switched off when I try to call him. Mariah shows up ten minutes later, and I jump in her car. “Thanks for coming to get me.”
“No problem. I can’t believe he stood you up.”
“I know. It’s not like him, but he hasn’t been himself lately. I don’t know what’s up with him.”
She wets her lips, looking at me anxiously. I lean forward in my seat. “If you know something, spit it out.”
“I wasn’t sure whether to say anything or not, but Cody says he’s getting into trouble with the coach and he’s skipped a couple of practice sessions and turned up half-drunk at a few others.”
“What?” I can’t believe my ears.
“The guys have noticed something’s up too, but he hasn’t breathed a word to them either.”
“Do you know where he is?”
She reluctantly nods. “When you texted me, I called Cody. He’s at the party at Zach’s house.”
“Can you drive me there?”
“You sure you want to do this?”
“I need to know what’s going on with him. He won’t talk when he’s sober. Maybe he’ll fess up when he’s drunk.”
The party is in full swing when we arrive, and I cough as we fight our way through the stuffy, congested hallway, past the crowded living room, and into the kitchen. I hear him before I see him, his loud laugh reaching me from across the room. Cody, Josh, Zach, and Ayden are surrounded by cheerleaders, and he’s laughing at something they said. My blood instantly boils. He stood me up to flirt with Becky’s minions?
I stalk toward him, tugging on his elbow. He looks down at me, blinking, his forehead puckering. “What are you doing here?” he slurs.
I cross my arms over my chest, ignoring the gaggle of girls waiting with baited breath for a new showdown. “I could ask you the same thing. Forget about something?”
His brows knit together, and he squints at his watch, swaying a little on his feet. Considering he’s so wasted, I’m actually glad he forgot to pick me up. There’s no way I want him driving in that condition. “Shit, Lina. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was so late.”
“Can we please go?”
He batters his forearms. “Don’t feel like going home yet.”
“Well, tough.” I hold out my hand. “Keys. Hand ‘em over.”
“Chill, babe.” He smacks a loud kiss off my cheek. “Stay and have a drink.”
“I don’t want to stay. I’ve been on my feet all night and I’m tired. I want to go home.”
He shrugs. “Well, go home. There’s nothing stopping you.”
“I’m not leaving you here.”
“You’re not my fucking mother, so quit acting like it.”
A few of the cheerleaders titter, and I grind my teeth. “You are not driving home when you’re fucking smashed, so give me your keys, and let’s get out of here.”
“No.”
“No?”
“No,” he repeats, sending me a challenging look.
I close my eyes in exasperation. A hand reaches out, patting my elbow. “I’m sober, Ange. I’ll drive him home, and he can come get his Jeep in the morning,” Josh offers.
My throat constricts as I nod, turning to leave. I’ve said all I’m prepared to say in front of the others. Before I go, Ayden hauls me to him, smashing his lips against mine. He smells like he drank the brewery dry. Annoyed, I wrestle out of his grip. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“See ya, babe.” He swats my ass as I walk away, oblivious to the tears welling in my eyes.
“I’ll drive you home,” Mariah says, looping her arm in mine.
I shake my head. “No, stay with Cody. I want to walk anyway. That’s why I didn’t offer to drive Ayden’s Jeep home.” It’s only a twenty-minute walk, and I need the time to process my thoughts.
“I don’t mind, and Ayden wouldn’t want you walking home alone.”
I send her an incredulous look as we step outside the house onto the lawn. “Yeah, right,” I harrumph. “Were you not just there when he patted me on the ass and sent me on my merry way so he could stay and get drunker and flirt with those sluts?”
“He won’t cheat on you.”
“He can go and fuck the whole cheerleading square for all I care,” I spit out, and the worrying thing is how little that statement genuinely affects me. I should care that my boyfriend would rather stay with those skanks than see me home safely, but I think I’m immune to rejection at this stage.
Mariah tries to steer me to her car, but I shake her off. “I love you, M, but you need to let me walk, because if I don’t, I’m going to go into my house and trash the fucking place. I need to walk off my anger. I have my phone, and I’ll text you the minute I get home.”
She nods sadly. “He’s being an ass, but that’s not who he is. You know he worships the ground you walk on.”
“He has a funny way of showing it lately.”
“Maybe he’ll talk to you now. Tell you what’s wrong.”
I hug my friend. “Perhaps. Go back to your boyfriend, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
She watches me until I disappear out of sight around the bend. I pull my hoodie up over my head, shoving my hands i
n the pockets of my jeans as I walk home, my head cluttered with grave thoughts and my heart aching.
I’ve been walking for ten minutes when a truck pulls up alongside me. “Ange?” Devin calls out, and I look up. “What are you doing walking by yourself?” I shrug, unwilling to discuss it with him. He kills the engine and hops out. “Get in, I’ll drive you home.”
“I want to walk.” I keep walking, refusing to look at him.
He jogs after me, gently taking my elbow. “Just stop for a minute.”
“Why? It’s not your job to take care of me. I want to walk so keep driving.” I shuck his arm off and take a step forward, but he plants himself in my path.
“Where is Ayden?”
“At Zach’s.”
Devin frowns. “And he let you walk by yourself?”
“Yes,” I say through gritted teeth.
“Did something happen?” I shrug again. “I’ll kick his fucking ass.”
“Forget it, Dev. It doesn’t matter, and it’s nothing to do with you anyway.”
“The hell it isn’t! He can’t let you walk off by yourself close to midnight. It’s not fucking safe. Get in the truck now, or I’ll put you over my shoulder and drag you myself.”
I glower at him. “You wouldn’t dare.” He sends me a cheeky smirk, and my lady parts swoon. God, I have missed him so much.
“Try me. Go on,” he challenges.
I sigh in exasperation, shaking my head. “Fine. I’ll get in the truck with you.”
We walk side by side in silence. Devin opens the passenger door for me, and I climb into the seat. “You fixed your truck,” I say once he is inside.
“Patched it up as best I could. I still need a few parts, but I’ll have to save up for them.” I pull my knees into my chest and look out the window. “I can’t believe Saint Ayden blew you off for a party. What the hell is wrong with him?”
“I don’t know. He won’t talk to me, but something is up with him.”
He’s reflective for a minute. “I can try talking to him if you like.”
I pin him with a dubious look. “And you think he’d talk to you over me? Hardly likely.”
“Probably not, but I can try.”
“I know what you’re trying to do, and it’s too late. He was adamant that nothing’s changed. That you don’t belong in our lives anymore.”
“What about you?” he asks, glancing quickly at me. “What do you think?”
I’m quiet for a bit before replying. “I agree. You breaking up with Becky is great because you deserve better than her, but it doesn’t change what happened between us and it won’t magically repair the damage. I can’t be your friend.”
Not when I still want more.
The thought lands in my mind unbidden, and I’m instantly guilty. Although Ayden’s acted like a jackass tonight, he’s the one who has stuck by me through thick and thin, and he’s my boyfriend. I shouldn’t be having thoughts of any other guy when I’m with him.
Devin slows the truck down as we turn onto our street. “I wasn’t with Becky by choice,” he admits, confirming my suspicions. “She lied to me. She said—”
I cut him off dead. “I don’t want to hear it. It changes nothing.” Devin still doesn’t see me as girlfriend material, and I can’t just be his friend. It hurts too much to be close to him and not touch him.
“But you don’t understand—”
My eyes narrow to slits as I peer out the windshield. An incredulous laugh busts out of my lips. “You’re right, I don’t. Because if what you say is true, why is Becky standing in your driveway glaring at us right this second?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Dev cusses under his breath. “I didn’t invite her here, and I don’t want anything to do with her.”
“Tell it to someone who cares.” My hand is curled around the door handle when he reaches across me, holding my wrist.
“Please, Ange. I need to speak to you. I’ll explain everything.”
“It’s too late, Devin, and I’m sick of all this crap. I just want to finish high school without any more drama. I’m tired of it.”
Becky storms to my door, yanking it open, almost wrenching my arm out of its socket. “Screw off,” she fumes. “I need to speak to my boyfriend.”
“For the last time, Becky,” Devin sighs exasperatedly, “I am not your boyfriend nor will I ever be again. I’ve nothing more to say to you, and I’d like you to leave.”
“I’m done with this,” I say, sliding out of the truck, and rounding the front.
Becky grabs a hold of my hair from behind, catching me off guard as she slams my face into the hood of the truck. Pain rips across my skin, bringing tears to my eyes. Devin roars, shoving Becky off and helping me to straighten up. Warm liquid leaks out of my nose and my vision is blurry.
“Get the fuck out of here now, Becky, or I will not be responsible for my actions.” Devin’s voice is laden with intent, and his fists are clenching and unclenching at his side.
“What the hell is going on out here?” a gruff voice shouts out as the sounds of approaching footfall tickle my eardrums.
Devin cusses again. “Ange,” he whispers urgently in my ear. “I need you to go into your house right this second. I don’t want my dad anywhere near you. Can you manage by yourself?”
Instantly picking up on the alarm in his voice, I don’t question his request. I nod, and with my vision still blurry, I stumble away, pressing my fingers to my nose to quell the blood flow.
Before I reach the top end of the fence I’m yanked sideways, and I scream at the unexpected contact. “Hey, pretty lady, where’d you think you’re going?” Devin’s dad asks, his alcohol-laden breath coasting across my face. I’m glad my vision is distorted because I don’t want to see the look on his face.
“Get your fucking hands off her,” Devin yells, yanking me out of his father’s hold and standing protectively in front of me. “She is not yours to touch.”
His father barks out a laugh.
“And she’s not yours to touch either,” Becky hisses, inching up beside Devin.
“Well, who do we have here?” Mr. Morgan asks.
“Go, Ange,” Devin whispers in my ear. “Lock all the windows and doors, and don’t come out, no matter what.”
I don’t need to be told twice. I run toward my house on wobbly legs, almost tumbling to the ground as I pull myself over the fence, but I keep going, not looking back. I fumble with the keys, but once the door is open, I fall inside my house, slumping to the floor in the hall. Hot tears course down my cheeks, but I quickly swipe them away. Screw the both of them. And Ayden. Hauling myself to my feet, I trudge up the stairs. As I strip off my clothes in my bedroom, sounds of arguing from outside filter in through the open window. Wrapping my robe around me, I pull the window closed, muffling the sounds of Becky, Devin, and his dad screaming at one another. I pad to the bathroom to clean up the mess that is my face. My nose is bloody and swollen, and a large bruise is already forming on my left cheek. After running a hot bath, I soak in the tub until my limbs have relaxed and the water turns cold. My skin is wrinkled like a prune as I dry and dress myself.
I’m running a comb through my hair as I peer out the window. All appears to be quiet on the home front now. Devin’s truck is missing, and Becky and Mr. Morgan are nowhere to be seen. Lights are on in the downstairs of the Morgan house, and I frown as I notice the cracked, broken pane of glass at the side of the house.
Popping a couple of pain pills, I retreat to bed, pulling the covers up over me to ward off the intense bout of shivering that has overtaken my body. It feels like I’ve lived a hundred lifetimes today, and, as my eyes flicker closed, I say a prayer that tomorrow is a better day.
I lounge around the house feeling sorry for myself the next morning. Mom is in bed, and Ayden is obviously still sleeping off his hangover,
so I’m grateful when Mariah calls, inviting me over to her house.
Betsy chugs and splutters when I turn on the engine, but mercifully she behaves the duration of the short journey.
I have my hand raised to knock on the door when it swings open. Mariah gawps at me with her mouth hanging open. “What the hell happened to your face?”
“Becky happened to my face,” I reply, stepping inside. Her parents and her little sister are away for the weekend, and Cody is staying over with her, but he’s doing stocktaking in his Dad’s hardware store today, so we’re on our lonesome. “Devin pulled up when I was walking home last night, and he insisted on driving me the rest of the way. Becky was waiting in his driveway when we arrived, and she didn’t take too kindly to me being there.”
“This has got to stop.” Mariah shakes her head. “You have to report her this time.”
“It didn’t happen on school grounds. They won’t care.”
“The hell they won’t.” She nudges me into a chair, handing me a mug of tea.
“Well then, we need a plan to take her down ourselves. I’m not going to stand by and allow this any longer. I can call Madisyn and Gabi right now and get them to come over.”
I shake my head. “Not tonight. I’m not in the mood for a group session. I just want to lick my wounds in private.”
She tilts her head to the side as she drops down on the couch beside me. “Yesterday was a bitch, huh?”
“Yep. Speaking of, did Ayd get home okay?”
Her brows lift. “You haven’t seen him today?”
“Nope. Either he’s still dealing with his hangover or he’s hiding from me.”
“Josh drove him home a couple of hours after you left. He was totally hammered and swaying all over the place, talking absolute gibberish, but he didn’t so much as look at any other girls,” she says, patting my hand, “so you can rest assured your boy is loyal.”
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