Alex’s lips formed a fine line. “Fine, I see your point. But please don’t ever bring up Leah again, especially in front of Aubrey.”
“I’m sorry. I hate her almost more than I dislike Nikki, and you know I love Aubrey. I just can’t think clearly right now.”
We walked over to the bar. Tyler was talking to Carly, one of the waitresses, so Alex got us both a drink.
Alex popped the cap off a beer bottle and set it in front of me. “Do you want to know what I think?”
“Sure.” I took a swig and focused on what he was about to tell me.
“I think that if this baby isn’t yours, you have a lot of groveling to do. Actually, you have a lot to do regardless. I’ve never seen you this torn up. Figure it out, and get your girl back. Maybe this new information will help.” Alex lifted a bottle to his mouth.
“Yeah, from your mouth to Julie’s ears.” I stood. “I need to call my brother.”
“Tell Bentley I said hi.”
“Will do, man.”
I grabbed my beer and walked over to a booth. I stared at my screensaver, a picture of me and Julie. We had been so happy when we snapped that selfie. Her smile was bright, and her eyes sparkled. Why couldn’t I have realized then that I wanted forever with her? Why had it taken losing her for me to realize she was it for me? Julie wasn’t like any other woman I knew. She was the one, and I’d lost her because I’d denied the woman I loved the one thing she wanted—our future. I stared at the picture while saying a silent prayer she’d forgive me for being so blind and quick to reject her. Alex was right. I needed to get her back.
Work. That was what I needed to concentrate on. I threw myself into creating the marketing proposal for the vineyard and the club. The reality of how intertwined my worlds were had solidified for me that we needed to coexist. Ours wasn’t a normal breakup. We ran in the same circles—both personally and professionally.
I was done lying to myself. Yes, I was a strong woman, but seeing him again had ignited a fury of emotions that were difficult to keep at bay and unnoticed. It would be impossible to hide my feelings from Aubrey when he and I were at her home on Sunday. Part of me didn’t want to hide my feelings, but I needed to protect myself.
When Brett had held me, it was as if his skin seared mine—but not in a painful way. His words were honest, and it took every ounce of my strength not to tell him I wanted him back. The feel of his chest rubbing against mine when we made love, the feel of his fingers tracing the curve of my neck, the way his gaze roamed my body as he appraised me in approval and made the pit in my stomach tingle, his soft lips molded with mine—those were the desires that exploded in me when I was close to him. It broke my heart to not act on them, but how could I?
I stared into space and wondered if we could get back there one day. Then thoughts of Nikki and her baby rushed in. I vigorously shook my head in an attempt to clear it of any ill thoughts. Mark knocked on my door. His easygoing demeanor was what I longed for. That used to be me, but now I was strung so tightly that if someone pulled my string, I’d spin for days.
“Hi, Mark. What’s up?”
He closed the door as he sauntered in, and he sat down. “Luca called Brian and told him your presentation was flawless, but I’m concerned about you.”
His gaze made me keenly aware that he saw through my facade. I leaned forward on my desk. “You’re concerned that my presentation was flawless? Or are you here because you’re wondering what happened with Brett?”
He relaxed his shoulders and leaned back in the chair. “I’m not surprised about your execution of your marketing plan. But I’m surprised that you think I don’t see how conflicted you are. It’s written all over your face. I know you, Jules, and I’ve been where you are. Your eyes don’t lie. They don’t hold the gleam I’m used to seeing when you pull off a major deal.”
I turned my head slightly. “It’s difficult. You know how it is. Remember when Jessica up and moved to London and left you?” I’d never forget the devastation and hurt she’d caused him.
He nodded, and his brows slanted in a frown. “Of course I do. It hurts me that you feel that way.” His eyes were filled with understanding. “Julie, when I see how this breakup has changed you, I feel as though I’m going through it myself. When you were away on business, it took every ounce of control I had not to go beat the shit out of Brett, but I didn’t do it out of respect for you.”
I smiled tightly and nodded. “Thank you. I wouldn’t want you to get into a fight over me.”
“So tell me, how was it when you saw him?”
I regarded him quizzically for a moment. “When I first saw him, all my old feelings came rushing back like a tidal wave. As I sit here and recollect that moment, they aren’t old—just suppressed.” My lips quirked to the side. “He’s hurting too.”
Mark’s face relaxed, and he let out a huff. “I’m sure he is. I’m also pretty confident he’s kicking himself for letting you go.” He walked to my side of the desk and squatted beside me.
I swiveled my chair to face him, and he took my hands. My head lowered to look at him.
“No man in their right mind would turn you down. You’re a special woman, and I never want you to forget that. I know what Brett did was unforgivable, but for once, put yourself first. I know you, and even if you could forgive him and take him back, you still might not because of the baby… if it’s his.”
Tears trickled down my cheeks. “That’s the hardest part.” Mark handed me a tissue from the box on my desk, and I blotted my eyes. “Thank you. Even if I do forgive him, how do I forget? How do I get past the fact that he was with her in a way he’d never been with me?”
Mark let out a huff. “I can’t tell you that. I know I’d never do that to Val, even if we weren’t together. I can tell you, as one of your closest friends, that sometimes people make mistakes. Don’t misunderstand. I think he’s an ass for doing what he did, but sometimes the male race doesn’t think with the right head.” He smiled and shrugged. “You deserve what I have with Val.”
I let out a muffled laugh. “Yes. I know.” Mark was right I did deserve a loving relationship and that was what I’d thought I had with Brett.
He winked and stood before taking his seat. “So now that we’ve covered the important stuff, tell me about the meeting.”
For once, my smile didn’t feel forced. “Thanks, Mark. You’re a pretty terrific guy, and Val is a lucky woman. You’re great together.”
He blew on his nails before he rubbed them on his shirt. “Yeah, I know.”
After I filled him on all the particulars, he went to his office to create the online graphics. Having Mark on our creative team was a huge help. He was extremely talented and an extraordinary person.
By the time I finished my proposal and sent it to Brian for final approval, I was ready for a break. Thankfully my boss told me to take the rest of the day off, which I kindly accepted. After I finished some errands, I headed over to Aubrey’s house. I needed my girl time.
“Hi, bro.” I was in need of brotherly advice. I hoped Bentley had some words of wisdom for me.
“Hey, little brother. I’ve been thinking about you. How are you?”
The concern in his voice reminded me of when we were kids and he’d broken my arm during a flag football game. Apparently he forgot he wasn’t supposed to tackle me. It was the weekend of my lacrosse tournament, and I couldn’t play, though I did play the guilt card for months. He became my gopher and chauffeur, so it wasn’t a total loss.
“That’s what I called to talk to you about. I went to the ultrasound, and we found out she’s having a girl.”
“Figures.” Bentley chuckled, and I shook my head. “Can you imagine having to fight off your daughter’s suitors?”
“If she’s mine.”
“Right. I can’t believe you didn’t cover it up. That’s sex ed 101,” he said.
“Yeah, well, I did cover it up. But I used a condom Nikki gave me, so who knows if she tampered with
it.” That thought alone irritated me.
“Wow, this woman sounds desperate.”
“She’s completely delusional.” Maybe changing the topic would help me feel better. “What’s new with you?”
“I’ve met someone. She’s really special. Remember I told you about that actress in Jersey?”
“The one you wrote a scathing review about? Wait, that’s all of them.” I chuckled, but he didn’t.
“I write honest reviews, but yes, her. She’s special.”
My cheeks rose as I smiled. “That’s great news. I’m happy for you.”
“You should go see Mom. She might have some words of wisdom for you.” He switched the topic effortlessly.
“I’m actually heading there now. I’ll catch up with you later.”
“Bye, bro.”
Pulling into my parents’ place made me feel at home even though I didn’t live there. My mother, the one woman I knew truly loved me and wouldn’t steer me wrong or make me feel like shit. I walked in and smelled her freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. She was in the kitchen, wearing her apron and humming as she slid cookies onto a cooling rack.
“Did you know your favorite son was coming?” I laughed.
With her back still to me, she said, “Bentley, honey, is that you?”
She turned and winked, and we laughed. That was why I loved my mother. She had two sons who both thought we were her favorite, and she would tell us each we were, though not when we were together. It was a long-standing joke between the three of us. I guessed we were momma’s boys.
“No, it’s your other favorite.” I chuckled and kissed her cheek. I sat at the breakfast bar as she placed a small plate of cookies in front of me.
“Milk or coffee?” she asked.
“A beer, if you have one.” I bit off a chunk of cookie.
“Beer and cookies? That’s revolting. But you drink orange juice with pizza, so I guess for you, it isn’t that strange.” Her smile was bright and cheerful and exactly what I needed. She handed me a Stella Artois. “Here you go.”
“Thanks.” I took long draw and a few more bites of the warm confection.
“So what’s wrong?” She untied her apron and sat next to me.
“I went to the ultrasound today.” I hated this. When I’d told my parents they might become grandparents, they weren’t completely upset—until I explained the situation. I pulled out the sepia photo Nikki had given me at the doctor’s and handed it to my mother. “It’s a girl.”
She held the thin paper, and it trembled in her grasp. “Brett, sweetheart, a girl? Oh, wait until I tell your father.” Her eyes glistened, and she blinked away tears.
“Yes, that’s what the technician said.” I took another sip of my Stella. “Mom, what am I going to do if she’s mine?”
She handed me the picture. “What do you mean what are you going to do?”
I exhaled. “I know that I’ll take care of the baby and love her, but what about her mom? What about Nikki?”
“Brett, sweetheart, I can’t answer that for you.” She placed her hand on mine. “What else happened? Not that this isn’t plenty, but I can tell when you’re not telling me the entire story.” She bit a cookie, waiting for my reply.
“So much has happened I don’t even know where to start.”
“The beginning.” Her calm voice soothed me.
“I saw Julie.” I looked down and shook my head. “God, Mom, how do I get her back? I love her so much. I truly can’t believe how dumb I was.”
“Look, sweetheart, sometimes life decides we need a challenge. This is one of yours and most likely won’t be your last. I know you can handle whatever comes your way, or your father and I didn’t do our jobs correctly.”
I nodded. “I think Nikki tried to trap me. I found out that I did use protection, but she gave it to me. I won’t marry her, Mom. I can’t. You and dad raised us in a loving home, and I can’t pretend I love her. If this is my daughter, I don’t want her to realize one day that her parents were unhappy and she was to blame.” Now I was the one with tears in my eyes. “None of this is this innocent child’s fault. I want her to be happy and feel loved.”
My mom hugged me. “Brett, why don’t you find out if she’s yours? I’ve never seen you so stressed out. You’re my baby, and I don’t like when you aren’t happy.”
I wiped away a stray tear. “I want to, but Nikki said it’s too stressful because of a big needle or something. I don’t want to harm the baby because I’m impatient.”
“Brett, sweetheart…” She placed her hands on my cheeks and traced my eyebrows with her thumbs the way she had when I was a kid. “It doesn’t have to be invasive anymore. I heard a woman talking about it at the club. Her neighbor is in the same boat, and she said it can be done with a simple blood test. Why don’t you talk to Aubrey about it? Maybe she knows.”
My first thought went to Nikki, wondering if she knew about this and withheld it from me. I stood and finally felt a twinge of hope. “Really? Thanks, Mom.”
I pulled her into a hug. I would always need her in my life, and if the baby was mine, I would always be there for her in the same way.
After I grabbed another cookie and said good-bye to my mom, I hopped in my car and headed to Alex and Aubrey’s house. They didn’t live too far from my parents’ place, but the roads seemed longer and never-ending. I passed a flower shop and decided to bring Aubrey a bright bouquet. It wasn’t anything fancy like the orchids Alex showered her with, but it was a thank you for being an amazing friend.
Once I pulled up at their house, I took a deep breath and prayed my mom was right. Even if she was, I’d need to convince Nikki to go along with the test. That would be my next challenge, but I was up for it. I grabbed the bouquet and walked up the porch steps.
Aubrey opened the door before I could knock. Her belly was starting to pop, and she looked adorable. “Hi, Brett! I heard a car pull up and saw you.” She pulled me into a hug, ignoring the bouquet. “I’m so glad to see you.”
I released her and presented the flowers. “These are for you.”
“They’re beautiful! What’s the occasion?” She lowered her nose and inhaled their scent. “They smell lovely. Come on in.” She moved out of the doorway, and I followed her inside.
“No occasion. I just wanted to.” I shrugged.
She walked into the kitchen, and when she came back out, the flowers were in a crystal vase, which she placed on the dining room table. “Okay, spill it. I highly doubt you came by because you were just in the neighborhood. Do you want a beer or something?”
“I actually was in the neighborhood. I’ll pass on the beer. I just had one at my mom’s.” I raked my hand through my hair. “But you’re right. I did come here for a reason.”
“Ha! I thought so.” Her lips curled into a beautiful smile. “Are you okay? I know you saw Julie. Is this about her?” Her voice was tentative, as though she was scared to bring up our meeting.
“Kind of, but not entirely. Like I said, I was at my mom’s, and we were talking about Nikki’s ultrasound today.”
“Oh my God! Do you have a picture? Do you know what she’s having?” Aubrey’s voice was full of excitement and anticipation.
“Yeah.” I pulled out the picture and handed it to her. “It’s a girl.”
Aubrey placed her hand on her chest as she stared at the photo. “Brett, wow. She looks perfect.” She handed it back.
I studied the photo for a minute before I placed it back in my pocket. “She’s actually why I’m here. When I talked to my mom, she said there’s a non-invasive test available to determine paternity. Do you know anything about it? Not that you would need it, but I thought maybe you’d heard of something.”
“Hold on. Let me go grab the folder my obstetrician gave me. There are so many pamphlets in there, and I think there may be one about that. But like you said, I didn’t need it, so I didn’t read it.” Aubrey left the room.
I rose and paced the hardwood while g
nawing the side of my thumb. My heart raced. I needed to find out if I was going to be a father. If I wasn’t, then I would do whatever I needed to in order to get Julie back. But then again, if I was the father, I would still try to get her back. I wanted her. I needed her.
Aubrey walked out with a green-and-white pamphlet, and she gave it to me. “Here it is. I looked at it briefly, and it appears the test is a simple blood draw that won’t affect the baby at all.”
My smile grew, and I wrapped my arms around Aubrey. “Thank you so much. I need to make an appointment and talk to Nikki. You’re the best, Aub.” I tightened my arms before releasing her, and I headed toward the door. “Love you, and tell Alex that he’s a fortunate man.” I smiled and shut the door behind me.
With a bounce in my step, I headed to my Rover. I was about to open the door when a car pulled up behind mine in the circular drive. Julie. My heart jackhammered against my ribs. I let go of the door handle and walked toward her car. She sat behind the wheel even after turning off her car. I didn’t want her to start it up and reverse out of there. I slowly raised my hand to greet her.
I made my way to her door and opened it for her. She unclasped her seat belt, and I couldn’t avert my eyes from the woman I loved. I offered her my hand.
“Thank you.” She placed her fingers in my palm and stepped out of her car.
We were so close the temptation to hold her was stronger than it had been at the club. “Hi.”
“What are you doing here? Is Alex home?” Julie crossed her arms and put space between us.
“No, I came to talk to Aubrey. I didn’t know you’d be here.”
She looked at the pamphlet in my hand.
“Yeah, about this.” I held it out to her. The smell of vanilla washed over me as her beautiful blond waves blew in the wind.
“What is it?” She narrowed her eyes. “You know what? I don’t need to know. I only came here to surprise my friend.” She stalked away from me.
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