by Wild, Callie
Was he willing to gamble the welfare of his future children?
No. He wasn’t.
He had to end things with Kat; even if telling her goodbye would tear him up inside.
He hugged her warm, sleeping body closer, fighting back the lump in his throat. Giving Kat up would leave him less of a person than he’d been before she came into his life. It would break his heart. But he would survive.
That’s what Sergei did. He survived.
It was all he knew how to do, for better or for worse.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Two weeks later
Kat
Kat struggled to hold on to her signature smile—the calm yet excited, earnest yet playful, competitive yet good sportsmanlike grin that had made her one of the final two contestants on Real-Life Rules to Catch a King.
She had a chance of winning, but the victory would be a hollow one.
Who cared about winning a stupid reality show when you were nursing your second broken heart?
“All right, Kingdom City, the moment you’ve been waiting for is only seconds away. Who will be declared the new Queen of reality television? Who will walk away with the million-dollar grand prize, and maybe even a proposal from one of our eligible judges? Find out when we return for the thrilling finale of Real-Life Rules to Catch a King!”
Kat sighed. Geez, the host was annoying.
It made her want to throw up—preferably on reality show stooge, Brian Withers—but she managed to restrain herself. It was almost over. The votes were tallied. All that remained was the final announcement of the “big winner.” Surely they would get around to that after this last commercial break.
The producers had drawn out the season finale for two hours already. Kat and her opponent, Maria del Gato, were on a stage in front of a studio audience of thousands, forcing smiles while the season was recapped in tedious detail on a big screen behind them.
Kat watched herself win eight out of the ten challenges, indifferent to the fact that she’d worked so hard for nothing. Normally it would have infuriated her, but she couldn’t seem to care. She shouldn’t have been surprised, really. The producers had said there would be a twist.
What a twist. It was so uninspired it was laughable.
In the end, the outcome of the show had come down to your basic popularity contest. The producers had allowed the show’s viewers to call in and vote for which of the women they thought deserved to win, even if that woman had already been dropped from the competition in an earlier episode.
Maria del Gato—a sweet woman widowed at twenty-five with three children—was chosen as contestant number one. It didn’t surprise Kat. Hell, she would have picked Maria to win if she had known it would be a matter of public opinion. Maria was a great lady, a kind person, and a kick-ass mom. She deserved a break.
What did surprise Kat, was that she herself—Katarina, the would-be murderess—was selected as the second contestant.
No matter how well she had behaved, she would never have believed that people would vote for a convicted felon. If she had been interested in her future, it would have given her a lot of hope.
It was funny really, the man she had once hoped would improve her chances in this stupid contest was the one who had taken the thrill of victory away from her.
She should be happy. She had proven herself, even if she didn’t win the grand prize. She would be welcomed back into the public relations field with open arms. She had already received tentative offers from two firms even before she was voted in as a finalist.
Kat had achieved exactly what she’d aimed for—a second shot at a real life.
Too bad she planned on turning it down.
She had tickets on the last train out of the city tonight. She had sold everything she owned, even her health club membership, and had enough money left to last her a few months. If she won the million dollars that would solve the money problems, but even if she didn’t, she had to go. She couldn’t do it anymore. She couldn’t live in the same city as the man she loved—and hated—so much it was physically painful.
Kat would never forget the way Serge had woken her with a cappuccino in one hand and her packed suitcase in the other, smiling as he said how much he had enjoyed their time together, but that it was time for her to go. She had done an admirable job of swallowing her shame and hurt and gracefully accepting both coffee and suitcase, even though he was the one who had insisted she bring things over.
He’d refused to let her go home to her own apartment, wanting to spend every moment together.
He had even told her he loved her.
She knew he had, though she suspected he would deny it. She’d been learning his language in secret since their first night in the shower. She was already fluent in two languages and conversational in two more, it wasn’t unusual for her to pick up new words and phrases quickly. Once she understood some of what he was whispering in her ear, she’d been even more inspired to keep up her study sessions. If being referred to as “my love” and “my heart” and “my perfect little cabbage” in his mother tongue didn’t count as some sort of profession, she didn’t know what did.
Looking at him now, however, it was hard to believe he had said any of those things.
There he sat in the front row of the audience, with the tallest and blondest of the idiot triplets draped over him. He was all smiles, laughing at the host’s horrible jokes and arranging his features into appropriately sympathetic expressions during the more “heartwarming” segments of the endless recap. He was the master of control, even in the hour of victory.
She wanted to punch him in the face, but she wouldn’t.
She wasn’t that person anymore. She wasn’t the unstable woman who had taken out a hit man and never would be again. Serge had helped teach her that, and she loved him for it, which of course made hating him more difficult. He’d taught her other things too, lessons that she would never forget. What she’d had with Serge—no matter how brief—had been worth the heartbreak.
Heartbreak faded with time. Her logical mind knew that, even if the aching in her chest made her want to curl into a ball and cry in front of the entire viewing audience.
“Welcome back to the thrilling finale of Real-Life Rules to Catch a King, the reality show that has…”
Kat tuned out the rest of Brian’s spiel and concentrated on her smile. He said the same thing every time, anyway. It wasn’t as if she had to pay attention. Instead, she let her gaze drift in Serge’s direction, her breath catching and her smile faltering when she caught his eye.
He was looking at her.
For the first time this entire, endless evening he was actually looking her straight in the eye.
He misses me. She felt the certainty of it as if he had whispered the words in her ear. He missed her, maybe even missed her a lot.
Then why hadn’t he called? And why had he thrown her out in the first place?
“Maria, Katarina, could you please join me at the microphone?” Brian’s voice was a hushed, dramatic monotone, underscored by an ominous drum roll.
You would think they were going to announce that one of them would be beheaded in the public square. The theatrics were killing her, almost as much as the spark of emotion she had glimpsed in Serge’s eyes.
“Ladies, the long road ends here and now,” Brian said, his voice dripping with artificial emotion. “Is there anything you would like to say to the people who have taken you into their homes and their hearts?”
“I would like to say thank you,” Maria said, her accent as charming as her tremulous smile and the tears glistening in her big brown eyes. “My children and I thank you from the bottom of our hearts.”
“Katarina?” Brian turned the microphone in her direction, his eyes glistening as well.
“I have to echo Maria,” Kat said, telling the truth. She was grateful for the people who had given her a second chance, even if Brian had already pounced on her last nerve. “Thank you to everyone who made me beli
eve that we can overcome our past, no matter how awful it might be. I don’t think anyone can know how much this opportunity has meant to me, but I appreciate it so very much.”
“Beautiful, ladies. Really beautiful.” Brian sniffed dramatically. “It’s a shame that we can only have one winner. But now, for the moment that has the entire Kingdom holding their collective breath. The winner is…”
Another dramatic pause while he opened the envelope….
“Katarina Masterson,” Brian said, the upward lilt of his voice letting everyone know he wasn’t quite finished. “You have performed well this first season. You have proven yourself to be a woman of class, intelligence and caring in every challenge. You have been an inspiration, touching not only our imaginations, but our hearts, as well. Katarina you will…not be taking home the grand prize tonight. Maria del Gato, congratulations on being the first winner of Real-Life Rules to Catch a King!”
Kat kept her smile in place as Maria screamed and cried and thanked God and the people of the Kingdom for her win. It wasn’t hard to do. Kat was genuinely happy for Maria.
Besides, what in the world would she have done with all that money?
Nothing. She’d been rich before, and knew money couldn’t buy happiness. It could buy food and toys and admission to the Kingdom’s better schools, however. It was best that the cash prize go to supporting Maria and her children.
“But the night’s surprises are not yet finished, ladies!” The excitement and cheering died down a bit, replaced by excited murmurs from the audience at Brian’s announcement.
“Katarina, you will be taking home a second-place prize of ten thousand dollars.” The host smiled, but pressed on before Kat could express her gratitude for the unexpected gift. “But that’s not all! Katarina Masterson, one of our judges has something they’d like to ask you.”
Kat felt her stomach drop as the King of Outer Kartolia stood up from the row of throne-like chairs lining one side of the stage.
He had to be kidding. This was just a publicity stunt to remind people that Outer Kartolia existed, right?
But the King’s expression looked sincere as he started to speak.
“Katarina, you have captured my heart these many weeks. I would beg for the chance to let me win yours. Come to my country, get to know my people, and see if you can imagine yourself a part of our world.” The king was attractive, no more than twenty-something, and his voice was hoarse with emotion.
Unless he was an incredible actor, the guy had really fallen for her. A few weeks ago, she would have called him a chump, but she’d gone soft where love was concerned.
“I don’t know what to say,” she mumbled into the microphone Brian held poised inches from her lips.
What do you mean you don’t know what to say?
You’re going to say no! You don’t even know this guy and he’s crazy if he thinks he’s in love with a woman he judged on a reality show.
But still, he was presenting her with a chance at a fairy-tale ending. Even more importantly, he was giving her somewhere to go, something to do, and a refuge as far away from Kingdom City and Serge as she could imagine.
They called it Outer Kartolia for a reason. Because it was outer. Waaay outer.
Not to mention that he was a beautiful man, with dark olive skin and brown eyes that shimmered with passion and kindness. He seemed like a good guy, and she knew he was a beloved king. What more could she ask for? It was clear she was horrible at choosing her own significant other. Maybe it would be smart to give love a try with someone who had chosen her for a change.
“Say yes, Katarina.” A smile stretched across the king’s face as he observed her indecision. “Give me the chance to show you how your life would be as my queen.”
“I’m sorry,” she said after another tense moment. “But I can’t. You seem wonderful, but my heart’s already spoken for.”
She wasn’t naïve enough to think that the words would change anything. Serge wasn’t interested in pursuing anything further between them, but it felt good to confess how she felt. She had never had the guts to call him her “love” in any language, though that was what he was, more than any other man, even the one she had married and nearly killed for.
“Very well then, thank you for the chance to speak my feelings.” The king took her rejection well. But why wouldn’t he? He was young, hot and a king. He’d have a million women lining up to catch him before he made it out of the building.
Before she could regain her bearings after the unexpected proposal, the show was over. The credits rolled, the theme music blared and Kat was swept away by the beautifully dressed assistant hostess.
Before she disappeared into the wings, she risked one more glance to the front row, only to find that Serge and the idiot triplet were gone, with no sign of them in the milling crowd.
He might not have even heard her. He might never know how she really felt. It shouldn’t have mattered, shouldn’t have hurt, but it did.
Kat finally let the smile slide completely from her face.
She didn’t have to pretend anymore, she only had to leave.
CHAPTER NINE
Serge
Serge waited at the door to Kat’s apartment for nearly two hours before he admitted to himself that she wasn’t coming home any time soon.
He called the gym, her favorite coffee shop, and every other place he could imagine she might be, but no one had seen her. He called the producers, the other contestants, and the crewmembers on the show, hoping that she’d gone out to celebrate with them. He had crossed his fingers that she was drinking a beer with someone he knew, who could tell her to wait for him until he got there.
But no one had seen her since she stepped into a cab headed downtown minutes after the final credits had rolled.
He hadn’t been fast enough. He had wasted precious seconds explaining to Sherry why he couldn’t see her home and why he had been wrong to take her out in the first place. Now Kat had disappeared and there was only one thing he could think of to do, one place to look for clues to where she’d gone.
The lock opened more easily than he had expected. He’d learned to pick a lock before he could ride a bicycle, his old man considering breaking and entering a vital skill no self-respecting Sokolnokov could live without. But even if he’d never popped a lock in his life, it wouldn’t have been difficult to force his way into Kat’s rundown apartment.
The thought scared him and he made a mental note to have a team out here tomorrow to beef up the safety precautions on her doors and windows. Maybe even install a security system while they were at it. If she didn’t feel ready to forgive him and move back into his place on a permanent basis, he at least wanted her to be safe.
He cursed as he flicked on the lights, the anger and fear coursing through him making him want to smash a fist through the nearest wall.
She was gone. Everything was gone.
The walls were bare and her furniture missing. Nothing remained except the faint hint of her perfume. That trace of scent made him want to break down, to cry and rage like a man who wasn’t capable of using his mind to discern what was best for him. He was a man in love, who had realized too late what an idiot he’d been.
Now he might have lost the woman who was his perfect match, the only woman he couldn’t live without. His knees hit the floor and his head fell into his hands.
Her voice sounded from the doorway a moment later. “How did you get into my apartment?”
“Katarina?” He lifted his head, eyes seeking hers.
She looked beautiful, as always, but tired. Her small frame was loaded down with two overstuffed duffel bags and she was pulling a suitcase that probably weighed more than she did.
His shoulders sagged with relief. “You came back.”
“I did I…” She trailed off with a scowl. “How did you get in here?”
“I broke in, I’m sorry.”
She absorbed this information with a guarded look. “Why are you kneeling in th
e middle of my floor?”
He stood, crossing the room to silence her with his lips on hers. After a moment she relaxed into the kiss, sending a wave of relief coursing through his chest.
She tasted better than ever. Her lips parted and her tongue stroked against his as he tossed her bags to the floor and slammed the door behind her. He slanted his mouth against hers, doing his best to show her how relieved he was to have this chance as he pulled her down to the carpet and tore at the buttons on her coat.
“Wait!” She pulled away, but continued to undo her buttons, an action that encouraged him.
“I was an asshole, forgive me,” he begged, more than willing to admit he had been wrong. He would confess to all of his sins and kiss her toes in supplication. He would lie down and take fifty lashes if that was what it took for her to give him another chance.
“Why? Because you were scared?” She slipped her coat from her shoulders, sitting back on her heels as she slowly worked at the buttons on her pale green shirt. It was the same shirt she’d been wearing the first time he had been lucky enough to get a taste of her passion and it made him even more eager to see the beautiful woman beneath it.
“I was scared,” he confessed. “I thought I was scared of you, of the things you had done in your past but—”
“But you were the one who said the past didn’t matter, Serge!” She sucked in a ragged breath as she began to work her buttons in the opposite direction, hastily concealing her lacy white bra. “You’re the one who convinced me I wasn’t that person anymore. Now you tell me that you weren’t buying your own line of bullshit?”
“Wait!” He pulled her to him, stilling her hands with his.
“Why are you even here? Were you afraid I was going to send a hit man after you, too?” Tears welled in her eyes.
Serge had never seen Kat cry, and he hated himself for hurting her.
“No, of course not. I realized the truth. I realized that I was afraid that you would keep me guessing and I’d never be sure our lives were proceeding according to plan.” He pleaded with her, tightening his grip on her wrists, refusing to let her go until she understood what he was trying to say. “But I was a fool and a coward. Can you forgive me?”