“What is it, Aunt Dina?” Billy had asked, taking the bait.
“Well, I’ve been presented with an exciting opportunity to be the head environmental engineer on the new Hudson River Rail Tunnel.”
“Wow! That’s great!” Billy said, but then looked confused. “Uh, what does that mean?”
Dina laughed and explained that she would be investigating the long-term impact the proposed new rail tunnel connecting New Jersey and Manhattan would have on the shoreline. She was going to be moving to an apartment in Hoboken during the week. She could come back to the suburbs on weekends. It was only going to be for a few months, but she was thrilled at the chance to head up the team on such an important project. Billy’s face still registered bewilderment.
“It the opportunity of a lifetime,” Dina said. “I can’t pass it up.”
“Opportunity!” Billy shouted, knocked over a glass and leapt from the table. “Be right back!” he said, vaulting up the stairs.
Lily could see Dina was proud of her new assignment and was happy for her aunt until she noticed several battered suitcases in the foyer. Wheels started turning and alarm bells ringing.
“Wow, Pop Pop,” she said hopefully, “are you excited to be going with Dina?”
There was an ominous silence at the table. Lily looked at her grandfather. She knew he was selectively hard of hearing. Plus, he was eating. She tried again.
“POP POP, ARE YOU EXCITED TO GO TO HOBOKEN WITH DINA?”
His focus was laser sharp. His head never moved. That lasagna was toast. Lily stole another glance at the suitcases. Dina mopped up Billy’s spilled water. Her father took another large sip of wine.
“Well, kids,” he said, “I wish your mother was here, but ...”
Lily stared hard at her father. He wouldn’t.
“Wait, where’s Bill?” her father asked, looking around. On cue Billy burst back into the room.
“Pop Pop is going to move in with us for a while,” he announced finally.
“Great!” Billy shouted, waving his quote book in the air. “I saw it in the Os.”
“Yeah, great,” Lily said to herself in a tone even the truly deaf couldn’t miss. She put her fork down and did a little family math. They lived in a small three-bedroom house.
“Where ...” Lily had started to ask when Pop Pop came to life.
“Est!” he yelled, pointing to his empty plate.
“You want more pasta, Pop?” her dad asked, trying to decipher the old man’s excitement.
“Est est est!” Pop Pop yelled again.
Liam looked at Dina. Dina squinted at Pop Pop. Lily wanted to scream.
“Dad.” She tried to get his attention.
“Eccoci qua!!” her grandfather shouted, moving his hands excitedly—gesturing was an integral part of his personal language.
Dina smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I think you’re right. Pop thinks this is the best dish you’ve ever made.”
Pop Pop nodded and put down his napkin. He made a motion with his fingers and then winked at Lily. Dina translated, “But he said to take it easy on the garlic.”
“You know,” Liam jumped in quickly, “I was thinking the same thing. I was watching the news as I cooked and sort of got carried away by—”
“Dad?” Lily tried to interrupt.
“Found it!” Billy yelled.
“Found what?” Dina and Liam asked in unison.
“The quote!”
“What quote?”
“About opportunity! Right here after all the ones about old age.”
“Oh, great, let’s hear it,” Dina said, and even Pop Pop seemed interested.
“Dad!” Lily could feel the rash of heat traveling from her shoulders up her neck.
“The only sure way to miss success is to miss the opportunity, ” Billy read.
“Amen to that,” Dina said, and raised her glass.
“DAD!!” Lily couldn’t take any more.
“What?” her father said, startled. “Why are you shouting, LJ? I’ve warned you about that temper.”
Lily took a deep breath and tried to calm down. “Where exactly is Pop Pop going to be staying?”
“In your room.”
Lily’s head started to spin.
“But Dad!” she started to argue.
He just held up his hand like a crossing guard. “It’s temporary.”
“Where exactly am I supposed to sleep?”
“With Billy. You can use the top bunk.”
“Why can’t he stay in Billy’s room?” Lily asked, glancing away after catching the old man picking sausage out of his dentures.
“Because old men need to go a lot at night. Your room has a bathroom.”
Lily wished she hadn’t asked. She felt like her world was crumbling into her plate of half-eaten lasagna.
“But Daddy.” Lily whined a feeble protest. She lowered her voice and held her hand to the side of her face. “Pop Pop stinks.”
Her father put his hand back in the don‘t-walk position.
“Enough. This is what’s happening, LJ, and your mother I and expect you to cooperate.”
“When?” Lily asked, already knowing the answer was that very night.
The next morning, Lily lay on her little brother’s top bunk, images from the game replaying endlessly in her mind. She couldn’t shut them off. She’d tried burying her head under the pillow as an escape, but the images just followed. She’d felt so certain she would score and at least tie the game. Why had it all gone so wrong? If Chris hadn’t made her play goalie, she would have had a whole other half of offense. It was his fault.
She wanted desperately to talk to Vee but couldn’t seem to pick up the phone. She had called while Lily was in the shower on Saturday night, but Lily still hadn’t called her back. She was dying to know what the select team coach had talked to her about, but a pang of jealousy hit her like a punch to the stomach. Vee had never said she wanted to be on the state team; she knew that was Lily’s dream. Without Lily, Vee wouldn’t even be playing for Brookville. Lily felt cheated and angry.
She rolled over and spied a snapshot on her brother’s bulletin board. Lily recognized it from the previous summer and a road trip the family had taken to Maine. Her mother was wearing a fuchsia tank top that read Keep Your Proboscis to the Grindstone, and her father was kissing a massive red lobster. Why did her family have to be such a band of freaks? No one else she knew had to share a bedroom with their phrase-spouting little brother, and she couldn’t even contemplate the HAZMAT zone that was once her beautiful bedroom.
Lily’s mind raced. Maybe if her parents supported her more at the games, she’d have scored. Why can’t my parents just have normal jobs like everyone else? she thought. Why do we always have to be so worried about money? Lily was developing a long laundry list of people to blame when she heard the front door slam and a familiar voice call, “Anybody home?”
Mom. Lily had forgotten she was due back this morning.
“Mom!” Lily answered in a yell, bolting up and forgetting she was in the top bunk. She cracked her head on the beam above and let out a sharp yelp. “Ow!”
“Lily!” Her mother flew into the room in a panic. “Oh my goodness, baby, are you okay?”
Lily suddenly broke into tears. She told her mom all about Saturday’s loss and not making the select team tryouts. Her mother stroked her face and wiped her tears away.
“Everyone has to lose sometime, honey,” her mom said. “You know that. Just be proud of the fact that you and your teammates played your hearts out. You’ll get them next time, I’m sure of it.”
Lily’s tears didn’t stop. Her mom kissed her. “What’s all this about, sweetie? Did something else happen?”
“Mom, I don’t want to share a room with Billy. Why can’t Dina take Pop Pop with her to Hoboken? Why does he have to stay here? He smells old!”
Her mother’s face changed with the speed of Lily’s best full volley. She raised an eyebrow and stepped back from th
e bunk beds. A noise in the hallway startled them both. Pop Pop coughed as he stood in the doorway, a hurt expression on his face. He turned and moved away.
“Lily Antonia James,” Lily’s mother said ominously. It was never good news to hear her full name at the start of a sentence. “You might want to rethink that last bit.”
“Mommy!” Billy burst into the room and hugged his mother. His F.O.M. radar immediately detected a target.
“She in trouble already?” he asked.
Toni James gave her daughter a look that caused her to slink back under the covers.
“Give us a second,” her mother commanded, and Billy smiled and skipped out of the room.
Her mother closed the door behind him and came back to the bunks so she and Lily were face-to-face. “Listen, there’s a lot more to Pop Pop than you know, and it would do you a lot of good to get to know him better.”
Lily’s head was pounding like a bass amplifier. She closed her eyes and massaged her temples. Her mom kept going. “Your grandfather has made countless sacrifices for this family that you don’t even know about, young lady, and giving up your bedroom for a few months isn’t asking much in return. In fact, it doesn’t even scratch the surface. We all support one another in this family. We are a team. I thought I taught you that. Maybe it’s my fault for not instilling . . .” Her voice trailed off.
Lily lay still.
“Sweetheart, are you okay?” her mom asked in a worried voice.
“Yeah, Mom, I’m fine,” Lily answered, but then recognized her own 0 for opportunity.
She struggled to sit up. “Maybe I hit my head a little harder than I thought. But I’ll be okay.”
“Oh, honey,” her mother said. “Don’t move. Lie back down. Turn to me.”
Lily opened her eyes slowly and felt a pang of guilt when she saw sincere concern on her mother’s face. She knew it was a dangerous card to play, but some things just had to be done. She couldn’t take any more. She faked a little groan.
“Heavens, are your pupils dilated? Are you going to throw up? Let me go get you some ice! Why do you children always seem to get sick right when I come home?”
Her mother rushed from the room, and Lily knew she was headed to the kitchen supply of prepackaged ice packs.
Lecture terminated. Phew.
Lily was lying on the top bunk savoring the silence when Billy traipsed into the room.
“Nice one,” he said, grabbing his quote book from the floor. “You going concussion or flu?”
chapter 11
Lily escaped her mother’s grasp after two icings and a bitter Filipino herbal tea that tasted like mothballs. She realized it was time to recover and face her fate and her friends at practice. Her mother seemed happy enough to forget her anger and Lily’s injury once she told her mother the tea had done its magic.
“I just knew that tea would come in handy one day,” her mom had said with satisfaction.
Lily avoided her teammates at school and made a point of getting to practice just as warm-up was starting. She was hoping to avoid any pre-practice lectures from her coach. She changed into her cleats and grabbed her ball just as Tabitha was walking onto the field.
“You want to warm up?” Lily asked.
“I thought you only warmed up with Vee,” Tabitha said, almost shyly.
“Not always,” Lily lied. Vee, she knew, was at a dental appointment, but Tabitha didn’t need to know that.
“Where does she live again, anyway?” Tabitha asked.
“Oh, in Lakewood somewhere.”
“Lakewood?” Tabitha asked, making a face. She passed Lily a looping half volley. Lily trapped it easily and sent back a clean pass low to the ground. Wait until Vee hears I was warming up with Tabitha, Lily thought. She’ll see what it feels like to be left out.
Yet her joy was short-lived. Her coach’s voice boomed from the bench. “LJ, come here, please.”
“Be right back. Gotta go listen to some ‘think time’ blah blah blah.” Lily opened and closed her hands like someone yammering on. Tabitha laughed and picked up the ball to do some juggling.
“Good luck,” she told Lily.
“Hey, Coach,” Lily said casually as she approached.
“Sit down, LJ.”
“But Coach, you always say sitting down makes your muscles cold.”
“Sit.”
Lily sat on the bench. Chris got up and started pacing in front of her. She couldn’t read his face but figured maybe she could try heading off his little speech at the pass.
“I’m sorry about Saturday, Coach. I know I wasn’t supposed to take that corner kick, but I just had a feeling it could get it in. It was so close too! I won’t miss next time.”
“That’s right, you won’t,” Chris responded. “Because you won’t be taking it.”
He stopped pacing and stood in front of Lily. “You really made a mess last game. And not only because of the corner kick.”
“I know,” she answered quickly. “I tried to get the ball to Vee, but she wasn’t open.” That wasn’t true exactly, Lily knew, but she wasn’t sure what Chris could see from the sidelines.
Chris sighed and sat down next to Lily on the bench. “LJ, you need to stop talking and start listening to me.”
Oh, great, here we go, Lily thought. Lecture on the launchpad.
“You’re a great player, LJ, a great player. But great players have special problems that ordinary players don’t have. Sometimes, in tough situations, players like you are tempted to just take over and do everything themselves. To just try to make a spectacular play all alone to score the goal we need to win the game. Sometimes it works, but usually not. I’ll tell you what, though—it’s never a good idea.”
“Okay, Coach. I hear ya.” Lily got up, hoping she could speed this along. Chris put a hand on her shoulder and eased her back down.
“The reason it’s a bad idea is because that is not how a team works. We work together as a unit. Each player has her job and her responsibilities. You know that. You play your position and the other girls play theirs, and, if everyone does her job, then the team works like a machine. A machine with a heart.”
Lily stared past Chris at her teammates on the field, laughing, chatting and passing around. Her legs jumped every time one of them thumped the ball. She wished Chris would finish already.
“LJ, when you lose your patience and try to do everything yourself, then the machine doesn’t work right. It’s broken because the other players don’t understand why you’ve abandoned the plan, why you aren’t doing what you are supposed to do. They wonder, should I forget my responsibilities too? Or should I do what I’m supposed to do while Lily gets to take over and hog the ball? They look up to you, and they’re confused. And confused players lose concentration and heart and start playing worse.”
Lily hung her head. Despite her efforts to block them out, images from the game crept back into her brain. The missed corner. Vee open wide in front of the goal. The confused looks her teammates gave her. She looked down and counted blades of grass. Why was he trying to make her feel worse than she already did?
“I am actually glad we lost that game because if you had scored and we had won, you would have thought that you did the right thing. You would have been rewarded for being selfish. It wasn’t the right thing to do. It was the wrong thing and we lost, which means I have a chance to teach you something so important it’ll help you for your whole soccer career.”
Lily moved her eyes to the swoosh on her cleats, but Chris’s tone was finally penetrating her sullen brain. She felt worried suddenly. She turned and watched his mouth as the words tumbled out.
“It’s easy to listen to me talk and it’s hard to maintain your discipline when we are under pressure,” he said. “You made bad decisions. Selfish decisions. Your passion got the best of you this time.”
Lily had to stop this. “I’m sorry, Coach, I just—” Chris cut her off. He looked her straight in the eye, holding her gaze. Lily started to
get a sick feeling in her stomach. “I know what you wanted to do, LJ. It was obvious. But you weren’t doing it for the team; you were doing it for yourself.”
“I said I was sorry,” Lily said.
“I know you did, but it’s not about being sorry. Understand that I am not mad at you.”
“You’re not?” Lily asked.
“No, I’m not mad at you. You made mistakes—mental mistakes. But I’m the coach, and my job is to help you eliminate your mistakes as much as you can. We only work when we work as a team. You have to learn from this.”
“I will, Coach, I promise,” Lily said.
“I know you will, LJ, because for the next two games you sit with me.”
Lily’s eyes flew open. She thought she might throw up. She must have heard him wrong. Her mouth felt dry, and she fumbled for words.
“I . . . I sit with you?” she finally managed to ask.
Chris nodded somberly. “For the next two games you’re on the bench next to me.”
“But—the championship?” Lily stammered.
Chris took his whistle out of his pocket. He didn’t twirl it. He wrapped it tightly around his wrist and gave it a curt blow, announcing the start of practice.
“LJ, I’m suspending you from the team. Pack up your stuff and go home.”
chapter 12
Lily grabbed her bag and marched off the field in a whirlpool of fury and humiliation.
Come to the game Saturday in street clothes, Chris had instructed. No uniform. No practicing.
Her teammates had watched in shock as Lily left, and her last image of the field was Chris gathering the girls to inform them of her suspension.
She wouldn’t go home. She couldn’t face Billy, Pop Pop and their flatulence fantasyland. Instead Lily found herself walking toward Katerina’s. That was usually a good sanctuary. Great piles of fall leaves were gathered at the street’s edge, waiting to be swept clean. Lily kicked at them with frustration, but they just fluttered away in an unsatisfying wave.
Breakaway Page 6