ADDICTED TO HIM

by Linette King

  When I got to the stop sign, I pulled my phone out because I remember she told me no pop ups, ever since the first time we had sex. I didn’t mind because I didn’t want anyone knowing what was going on with us.

  Amere: say baby girl. I think I left my wallet at yo place. Can I come through and look?

  I pulled over at the gas station waiting on her to respond. It normally takes her five minutes, at the longest. Fifteen minutes later, I realized she was probably mad because I got a little carried away last time I was over there.

  Amere: I'm sorry for laying hands on you. I need my wallet tho.

  The bitch still didn’t respond to me. I sat there thirty more minutes waiting on a reply that never came.

  Amere: Armani man you foul af for not responding!

  I know you sitting there reading thinking this nigga foul as fuck but you don’t understand how shit happened. It was far from planned and Armani knows I only love Tamia, and she’s ok with that. I fucked Armani for the first time years ago when Tamia first left me. That’s when I kept going to Armani’s door and she wouldn’t let me in. Well, when she finally did, she wasn’t acting like herself.

  I walked in Armani’s messy apartment with one thing on my mind and that was Tamia. “Where is she?” I asked Armani, who just sat across from me looking into space. She had me sitting there wondering what the hell she let me in for if she was going to ignore me when I got there. “Armani!” I yelled.

  “What nigga? Why should I tell you? You didn’t know what you had until you lost her and now, you want me to help you find her? For what? You should have loved her when you had the chance?” she screamed at me.

  “I do love her and I’m going to come here every day until you tell me where she is,” I said sincerely. I looked away waiting on her to snap but she didn’t. When I looked back at her, her eyes were filled with tears. “What the hell is wrong with you?” I asked confused.

  “I wish I had someone fight for me like you’re fighting for her,” she replied, plainly letting the tears fall. I ain’t no fucked up ass nigga, so I got up and sat next to her. I put my arm around her and she laid on my chest. We stayed cuddled up until we fell asleep. I woke up and Armani was kissing on my neck. She started unbuckling my pants and I stopped her. “I just want to feel good,” she said. Now, what kind of nigga would I be not to make her feel good when she’s sitting here sad and I’m able to help?

  I scooped her up in my arms, kicking shit out the way as I made my way to the first bedroom I came to. When I walked in, it was spotless so I knew it was Tamia’s bedroom. I wanted to take her to the other room but shit, we were in here now. “She’s not coming back tonight,” she stated as if reading my mind.

  I allowed her to take my clothes off and she hopped on my dick. She was doing a piss poor job, so I began to guide her hips with my hands. It didn’t take long for her to get the hang of it and before long, I was using my hands to slow her down. She came and I wasn’t too far behind her. Afterwards, she walked me to the door and didn’t mention it again.

  We didn’t fuck or communicate at all until that next year. She posted a picture on Facebook straddling a chair with all that ass hanging off. My dick got hard instantly. I started sending for her to come see me regularly. She never posted a status about Tamia and she never talked about her, so I assumed some shit popped off and they weren’t friends anymore.

  I didn’t find out they were still close until she told me she lived alone, so I could come over to her place and it turned out to be a place she shared with Tamia. I got so fucking pissed off that I beat the fuck out of her. I had to beat her for all the pain this shit was going to cause Tamia when she found out. I knew she would find out eventually because Armani had been talking about us being exclusive, since I was the only dude she was fucking that wasn’t married.

  I didn’t understand her logic at all. Why the fuck would I be exclusive with someone that was admitting to fucking married niggas. She was fucking us all for money. Shit, I’m really like Shy Glizzy that sing that shit that say “I can trust myself, I can’t trust myself. So, the fuck I look like trusting anybody else?” Nigga had to have made the song for me because I promise you, I trust nobody!

  I decide to just pop up on Tamia since Armani ain’t responding. I’m really popping up on Armani but if Tamia answers, I’m going to act like I followed her home one day and have been trying to talk myself into knocking. I pull up to Tamia and Armani’s building so I can get out but I see some dude with dreads coming out of the door. That’s why the bitch wasn’t answering! Her ass had one of them married men in there. Slutty ass bitch!

  I wait until he gets in his car and he looks familiar, but I can’t place it. After I watch him drive away, I head up to the door and knock. Tamia opens the door with a smile on her face that disappears as soon as she sees me. “What the hell Amere? What are you doing here?”

  I stood there frozen, not really knowing what to say to her. I had all of these thoughts in my mind on the way over on how things would play out. I just knew when I saw her I would apologize and she would actually listen, and some kind of way we would be good. I stepped fully into the apartment and took a seat on the couch. The look on her face was priceless! I could tell she was shocked but I could tell she was pissed the fuck off too. “Is Armani here?” I asked her.

  “No, I haven’t seen her all day, why?” she returned.

  “So, that nigga was here for you?” I asked, getting pissed off. The more I thought of someone else touching her body, the angrier I got. I couldn’t believe she done came out here and turned into a hoe! Bitch was too focused to spend time with me but the way she opened the door smiling was like she feeling this nigga. She stood there with her arms folded across her chest and the meanest scowl I have ever seen on her pretty face. It was then that I realized I had never really seen her mad. I mean, I’ve seen her beat a few bitches up but she would fight at the drop of a dime. This scowl was towards me and I had never seen this side of her before. I didn’t know what to expect.

  She walked up slowly to me, swaying her hips with every step. She didn’t close the door but I didn’t care because I didn’t want to break her stride. When she got within arm’s length, I stood up to hold her but she reared back and slapped the fuck out of me.

  “I been wanting to do that for years!” she said before sighing with relief. I was so damned confused. I didn’t even say anything. I knew she felt like I deserved it.

  “Can we talk?” I asked her.

  “About?” she replied shortly.

  “You and ole boy,” I stated because I know she already knew.

  “What about him? Before you answer that, remember you have no place in my life to question anything I have going on.”

  “You doing that shit Armani be doing?” I asked her and watched as she laughed. She laughed real hard then stopped out of nowhere.

  “How you know what Armani does?” she asked with a straight face, like she wasn’t just laughing a minute ago.

  The question caught me off guard but being the nigga I am; I always think quick on my feet. “Shit, who don’t know? You must still don’t have a Facebook page?” I asked, changing the subject. She didn’t respond. “Are you feeling him?” I asked her.

  “Yes,” she replied.

  “Why?” I asked.

  Rashard

  I was so glad I hit Tamia up when I did because she is everything I assumed she would be. The only thing I wasn’t thinking about is if she could cook or not. When I got to her house, I expected her to open the door with little shorts on and a tank top shirt, like most bitches do. Tamia had on sweatpants, a t-shirt that showed her stomach, and her hair was in a ball. The way some hair strands fell around her face made her appear angelic.

  When I walked in, everything was clean. It made me wonder if she keeps everything like this or if she just did this on my way over here. I know some bitches shit be filthy and you won’t know it unless you pop up on her. That or tell her you’re on your way whe
n you're not far enough away for her to actually clean up. Anyway, she gave me a quick tour opening and closing every door except one. I assume that’s her roommate’s room. When she opened the hall closet, I saw she had all of her towels folded in the same direction. She had all of the hangers facing the back of the closet and the blankets on the shelf. Yes, she a keeper!

  We made it back to the living room and she turned on some show called Revenge that was on Netflix. I normally don’t watch TV but it was a pretty good show. About ten minutes in though, I heard her stomach growl and she asked me if I wanted anything to eat. What nigga gone say no? I gave her a head nod and continued watching the show. I wanted to tell her to start the series completely over because I felt out of the loop and I liked to know everything.

  We ate meatloaf, mashed potatoes with gravy, and sweet peas with some raspberry tea. The shit was bussing, I swear! I wanted to go in her room, pack up all her shit, and move her to my crib right now. After we ate, she took our plates in the kitchen but she didn’t come right back. I don’t trust people, so I got up to see what she was doing. She had a little grocery bag on the counter that she was dumping the remaining food off our plates into. I watch silently as she tied the bag and pressed down releasing all the air. She walked out the side door, placing the bag outside in the trashcan and came back in, cleaning our plates. She didn’t sit them in the dish rack though, she dried them off with a paper towel and put them in the cabinet. I’ve never seen a woman my age do all of that. I walked back into the living room taking a seat on the couch.

  A few minutes later, she came and joined me, apologizing for the wait. We talked about everything under the sun but I noticed she kept checking her phone and looking nervous. “What’s the matter, Miss Lady?” I asked. She shook her head like nothing was wrong. I grabbed her chin turning her to me. “Listen, I’m here for you. Tell a nigga what’s bothering you so I can help,” I demanded.

  “It’s Armani, that’s my roommate. She left this morning with one of her dudes and she hasn’t been back a single time,” she said. I thought it was cute that she was worried about her friend but if she was gone with a man, he probably decided to let her stay overnight.

  “Maybe she stayed the night with the guy,” I said and she gave me a strange look. I could tell she was trying not to tell me something. “You have to tell me everything babe.” I don’t know what made me call her that but I needed her to trust me. For some reason, since it was bothering her, it started to bother me too.

  “Armani has four guys that she sleeps with for money. Three of them are married and I know nothing at all about the other one. He doesn’t want anyone to know they mess around and she made sure she kept his secret, even from me. She left this morning with one of the married ones so she isn’t staying the night,” she paused as if thinking about something. I was glad she paused because I hadn’t digested it all yet.

  I was literally sitting here wondering if Tamia be doing the shit too. I mean, you are the company you keep, right? Instead of trying to help her, I was now trying to find a good exit. I felt like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place because she didn’t seem like the type but she told me herself that her and ole girl was as thick as thieves.

  When I looked back at her, she was looking at me with questioning eyes. “Look-,” I started but she cut me off.

  “I know you’re thinking I do it too, which is why I didn’t want to tell you. People are so quick to judge you off of someone else’s actions. This an opposites attract type of friendship, not birds of a feather,” she said and I released a breath I didn’t even know I was holding. That caused both of us to burst out laughing.

  “Finish telling me,” I told her.

  “Armani comes home periodically throughout the day,” she said.

  “How do you know?” I asked her. It’s strange for her to know how often Armani is here when she’s normally at school all day.

  “I go to my first two classes and come back home for lunch. I clean up whatever it was that she left behind, eat, and go back. When I come back home between my last class and track practice, I have to clean again. Then after track practice but that late, it’s normally just clothes,” she said then started playing with her fingernails. I felt bad for her having to clean behind another grown woman.

  I grabbed her hands into mine. “I’ll find her for you,” I said to her then leaned over kissing her forehead. She shifted her body so she could sit closer to me. I usually don’t let bitches cuddle me but Tamia is going to be my wife. After a while I decided to leave, she looked disappointed but quickly smiled when she noticed I was looking at her. “I’m going to come see you when you get off work tomorrow, Miss Lady,” I said kissing her forehead.

  “What happened to babe? I kind of liked that,” she said smiling.

  “Come walk me out babe,” I said to her before winking.

  As soon as she opened the door, I saw a guy sitting in front of the building looking at the door. I didn’t say anything to her; I just walked off heading towards my car. I was able to look at him without him knowing because he was still staring at the door. I had a bad feeling about what was about to happen and I had no clue what it was. I backed up so I can get a clear shot at his brake lights, so I could see if he had his foot on the brake or if he had the car in park. It was in park because the brake lights weren’t on. That meant he was being patient, waiting on his time to enter.

  I didn’t know if he was there for Armani or Tamia, all I knew was Tamia was in there alone and she’s unavailable. I hit a block and came back to park. Just as I expected, he was no longer in his car. I glanced up at the door and it was wide open, so I hopped out and walked casually to the door, standing in the foyer.

  I listened to her ask him why he was there and he asked for Armani. I listened to their conversation until I heard a slap. I glanced around and she had done slapped fire from dude, and he sat back down. I don’t place my hands on women in a violent way but I can’t say I wouldn’t start if one hit me like that. I continued listening until he started asking about me. I was making my way into the living room until he asked her if she was feeling me. I only stopped because I wanted to know how she felt. When she said yes, that was all I needed to hear to drop these bitches.

  Man, I bet you never thought I’d be talking about dropping bitches! Shit, I’m normally trying to recruit these bitches to my team. Tamia’s the perfect package though. She’s what I’ve been subconsciously looking for. I started to send all my hoes a group message telling them it's over with, but I’ll just ignore them and they’ll get the point. “Why?” I heard this nigga say.

  “Because I’m that nigga,” I say, making my presence known. She turned towards me and winked before turning back around. That wink made ya boy want to scoop her little ass up and take her to her room to punish that pussy.

  “This why you left the door open?” he asked, pointing to me.

  “Why are you here?” I asked him before she could respond. I could see her with my peripheral vision shifting her weight from leg to leg, letting me know taking charge turns her on. Either she’s turned on or she has to piss.

  “Why nigga?” he asked looking at me. I could tell he had heart. If the circumstances were different, I’d give the nigga a job.

  “This my girl,” I said before glancing at Tamia, who was hiding her surprise very well. She didn’t even look my way as she took a seat on the couch. “Who or what are you looking for?” I asked after noticing he kept looking towards the other bedroom. I began to put two and two together in my head. Some foul shit had been going on and I hate to hurt Tamia, but she’s pretty blind to the bullshit.

  “He’s your ex, right babe?” I asked Tamia. She told me about him and described him and the chick he cheated on her with. Now that I think about it, this is the nigga that made Tamia run out the store at the mall. Man, I’d bet my last dollar that Armani was the chick following me at the mall!

  “Yes,” she answered me without looking away from the TV.
I glanced at it and this crazy ass girl is watching Revenge again, like some shit ain’t popping off right now in her damn living room! I’m telling you now, if you weren’t listening before, dark skinned bitches are crazy!

  I focused in on him, “Bruh, what’s up? What do you need? How do you know where Tamia stay?” I asked him question after question. This nigga started sweating so I knew my assumption was right. I planned on hitting the blocks but shit looking like my girl will need me.

  My last question must have caught Tamia’s attention because she started mugging the fuck out of ole boy. “Yeen gone answer the question?” she asked him.

  “I- I- I um… followed you home one day,” he answered, looking at the wall behind her head. See, she probably thought he was looking directly at her but from the angle I’m standing, I can tell he ain’t making eye contact. This nigga a real live liar! He knows he can’t lie looking into her eyes, so he’s focusing in behind her. I really should hire this nigga.

  “Bullshit!” she replied standing up. I had no idea what she was about to do. You know these dark skinned bitches are unpredictable! I watched her get in a fighting stance like she’s really about to bang dude out. “How you know where I live? Look at me nigga, not behind me,” she said shocking the fuck out of me. I thought for sure her little ass was about to buy the shit.