by Gayl Jones
I comes before you this morning to tell y’all that y’all is too strong a people not to keep on keeping on. People has asked me to know the true doctrines of the Perfectability Baptist Church. I ain’t going to lie to y’all, but rumor has it that Perfectability Baptism is a combination of African Methodist Epicopalism, Scientific Christianity, Holy Roller Theology, Southern Baptist Theology, and Gladys Knight and the Pipism. We is too strong a people not to keep on keeping on. We is too intelligent a people not to keep on keeping on. We is too wise a people not to keep on keeping on. We is too sound a people not to keep on keeping on. We is too spirited a people not to keep on keeping on. I ain’t going to lie to y’all and tell y’all that y’all is a perfect people, like some peoples tells they peoples. I ain’t going to lie to y’all ’cause y’all would know I’m lying. We has spiritual perfection and we has the capacity to reverse the fables that the enemies of our peoples says about us and to attain the truth of who we is and who we wants to become.
Tell it like it is. Rev, say John Henry.
We has spiritual perfection and we has the capacity to reverse the fables about usselves and to attain the truth of who we is and who we wants to become.
Tell it like it is, Rev.
We has spiritual perfection and we has the capacity to reverse the fables about usselves and attain the truth of who we is and who we wants to become.
Tell it like it is, Rev.
We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on.
We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on.
We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on.
We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on.
We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on.
Tell it like it is, Rev.
We might not be a perfect people, but we is a perfectable people.
Tell it like it is, Rev.
Monkey Bread and John Henry rises in the air and flies about the room like they is in a magic show. I knows that Monkey Bread wants to quote from Maya Angelou, but so many people quotes from Maya Angelou that she resists quoting from Maya Angelou. They rises to the ceiling and starts dancing on it just like in the videos.
We is a sane people. Don’t let nobody try to tell you you is crazy, say Monkey Bread. They racism makes them crazy fools. They racism makes them schizophrenic, not us. We is a sane people. John Henry to the rescue, John Henry to the rescue, John Henry to the rescue, John Henry to the rescue, John Henry to the rescue, John Henry to the rescue, High John the Conqueror Henry. How come you don’t use your whole name, John Henry?
’Cause ain’t everybody that knows who I is.
Then they parades around the walls and the ceilings, traveling the whole bathroom.
Too strong not to keep on keeping on. We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on. Ain’t we, y’all? Sing with us, congregation. Too strong not to keep on keeping on. Say we too strong not to keep on keeping on? Yes, we’s too strong not to keep on keeping on. Halleluia. We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on. Say it again. We’s too strong not to keep on keeping on.
We rose from the tub. We dried each other. I put on my jeans and sweatshirt and wrapped a towel about my head and he put on a royal-looking robe and we went into the living room. I sat on the sofa. He went into the kitchen and came back with two cups of hot chocolate with marshmallows floating on top like floating islands. He sat beside me and put on his glasses. He looked through some letters that were on the table that had postmarks on them from around the world and looked like they were written in different languages of the world. Then he sat back on the sofa, drank his hot chocolate and looked at me.
THE REVOLUTION
You know I ain’t recited that seventh love poem since the Revolution, I said, sipping hot chocolate.
What do you mean?
Well, that was when Monkey Bread and I was ostracized.
You got your recorder, John Henry? asks Monkey Bread.
John Henry reaches into his pants pockets and takes out a miniature recorder.
I don’t know what you’re talking about, says Ray.
Well, when Monkey Bread and I were in high school everybody was talking about the revolution so Monkey Bread had a party. A lot of people came to it, even John Henry Hollywood. Monkey Bread said she wouldn’t believe in the revolution till she saw it, and since everybody was just talking about it, she decided that she would throw a party that she would call the revolution. So we had the party in the basement of Monkey Bread’s house. People who come to the revolution had to come dressed up to resemble they favorite revolutionaries. So there’s a lot of people that came as el Ché more than anybody, there was a few of the Black Panther heroes and the Black Panthers’ wives and girlfriends, ’cause the women thought they could only come as the wives and girlfriends of the revolutionaries. A few of them women come as Harriet Tubman or claimed they was Harriet Tubman. A few men come as Marcus Garvey, though some of them that come claiming to be Marcus Garvey looked more like W. E. B. Du Bois. There was one Frederick Douglass and a few Nat Turners. Seem like the man that wrote that book The Confessions of Nat Turner had published his book, so they was denouncing that book and claiming to be the true Nat Turner. One brought his girlfriend that at first I thought was a white girl. There was one that come as Martin Luther King, but they sent him back home and he returned as Nat Turner. Some people came as Brazilian revolutionaries. There was a lot of Malcolms. A lot that only thought they looked like Malcolm, a few that really did resemble him. Some of the young women came as Malcolm’s wife. There was people dressed up to look like the Black Muslims. They let Gandhi stay, though he was supposed to be a nonviolent man. One guy was supposed to be some Algerian that had fought in the war against the French. I don’t know the names of all of them. There was even a John Brown. I wasn’t sure why Monkey Bread had that party myself. I do know that a lot of the people didn’t get to the party on time. And she said a lot of them wouldn’t even be there on time when the revolution did come. And there was one guy that didn’t get there till the party was over. He peeked his head in the basement door and said, I thought somebody said they was having a party in here, and Monkey Bread says, Do we look like we’s having a party? But by then they had ostracized the both of us.
How did they ostracize you? What do you mean?
I was dressed up to look like Sojourner Truth, wearing a scarf on my head and one of them type dresses they usedta wear back in them days, but didn’t nobody know I was Sojourner Truth, and then after I read that poem about love, they starts calling me Aunt Jemima and handkerchief head and names like that and saying that love ain’t the proper subject matter for a revolutionary. So Monkey Bread she gets up and starts cussing everybody out and telling them about theyselves and then she leaves and comes back dressed up to look like a cannibal with a bone pasted to her nose and still cussing all of them for calling me Aunt Jemima when I supposed to be Sojourner Truth. And telling me the least thing I knows who I am and they don’t even know who they’s supposed to be and shit like that. So they ostracized the both of us. You know, we went all through high school being ostracized, and there’s still people in Covington that calls me Aunt Jemima. They don’t even know me by Mosquito or my true name.
What about John Henry?
Daylight come and me want Monkey Bread, sing John Henry, and him and Monkey Bread comes out of the bathroom and into the front room where me and Ray is. Monkey Bread is dressed like a cannibal, the same cannibal costume she wore at the Revolution. She dances around with John Henry as he sings, Daylight come and me want Monkey Bread. Then they does the Argentine tango together.
We thinks that we has got enough for us movie. Come on John Henry, these fools don’t know nothing about making no American movie. I knows y’all knows that this is not ideal cinematic form. Come on, John Henry. John Henry goes into the bathroom and comes back with the bunch of bananas. Then Harry Belafonte starts singing, you know like people starts singing in the movies. He sing the true “Banana Boat Song.”
Me and John Henry is going to Florida, say Monkey Bread. Maybe they is got some Seminoles that wants to rebel. Come on, John Henry.
Daylight come and me want to rebel, sing John Henry.
Yeah, they ostracized him too. I said. ’Cause he grabbed Monkey Bread and took that pasted bone off her nose. And tried to calm the fool down. Then she looked up at him and started singing that song about John Henry. So they ostracized him for protecting us. I mean. I looked like a fool after I’d read that poem about love ’cause I thought sure everybody knew I was Sojourner Truth. I thought they knew my true name was Sojourner and would naturally know that I would come to the revolution as Sojourner Truth. So John Henry rescued us from the revolution. Least from that party. Plus somebody had seen me come in the door with a plate of watermelon and some fried chicken. I didn’t know I wasn’t supposed to bring watermelon and fried chicken. I didn’t know they’d mistake Sojourner Truth for Aunt Jemima. But they’s always peoples who looks at you and don’t know who you is. I did have a white person to put an umbrella in my hand and to photograph me at the Derby to try to make me look like Sambo. One of them multicolored, rainbow-type umbrellas. I thought it was pretty till I realized they thought I was Sambo. And published my photograph in the newspaper ’cause I was the only jiggaboo at the Derby that wasn’t serving mint juleps. Except the time Whoopi Goldberg came there. And I would still come to the revolution dressed as Sojourner Truth. I know I didn’t like what I seen them do to Maria’s cousin. I seen pictures of her since that time, and she ain’t never looked helpless and hopeless in none of them early pictures of herself.
I starts to boast how when I was standing there with Maria and her cousin I imagined myself like Stallone in them movies, but even they ain’t like Stallone in they movies. In reality they organizes theyselves. Like that poem by Sterling Brown say. Them people don’t come at you in ones. Then they tell you you ain’t supposed to blame them all for what a few of them do. Now I seen them. And my impression is the same as his. I’m sitting there imagining I’m Stallone coming back to that place where they held Maria’s cousin. Course there’s those of you thinking that Maria’s cousin ain’t my cousin. How I’m supposed to be so concerned about how they treated her. But then I ain’t telling my story to y’all. I’m telling my story to them that know what I means.
You didn’t tell me who Monkey Bread came as, said Ray, looking at me from over the top of his glasses. And in that royal robe.
Herself.
And John Henry?
His natural self. To tell you the truth, when I seen Monkey Bread dressed up to look like a cannibal I wanted to ostracize her myself. I mean if them high schoolers hadn’t ostracized me first. I mean I brought fried chicken and watermelon to the party, but I didn’t do it with evil on my mind. I stopped eating watermelon till I learned it was a true native of Africa.
Now he’s looking at me like he don’t know whether I’m telling him a true story or whether I’m signifying myself ’cause he said I ain’t told him no stories. You know, maybe he thinks I’m just telling him a story, ’cause he said I ain’t never told him no stories. I gets up like I’m getting ready to go, but he slaps the seat beside him. I sit back down, but he don’t say nothing to me. He starts reading them letters on the table. Course you know I’m wondering whether I told him too much about myself than he need to know. Or even if it is a confabulatory story, maybe it ain’t the type of confabulatory story that he thinks I would tell. You know, like when Delgadina create them characters, they has got to do and say things that is consistent with they personality. And then mens has got they own ideas and preconceived notions of a woman. They’s got one idea of you till you expresses too much. I likes people to express too much about theyselves myself. I won’t lie and say I ain’t got no preconceived notions.
That’s a true story, I said. Monkey Bread did have a party and call it the revolution.
He don’t say nothing. He continues looking at his correspondence. I think he going to be playful with me, you know how mens is in the romances when they’s in love. But to tell y’all the truth he be acting more like them exemplary types of men. I remember Delgadina be reading one of them books called Blakes, or the Huts of America, ’cause she were taking a class in African-American literature, and she say it were an interesting book, as a historical book and the types of ideas it contained.
’Cept Martin Delany has the burden of having to make a exemplary man, she said. It doesn’t mean it’s not the man’s true self in this book. But people like Blake, they have the burden of being exemplary men. I’m thinking what his personality would be like if he had the kind of freedom, well you know, if he had the kind of freedom.
I be sitting there and think whether Ray got the burden of trying to be a exemplary man.
What you need is a personal assistant, like Monkey Bread’s star, I says, watching him with that correspondence. Them movie stars they’s got personal assistants who answer they correspondence. You sho got a lot of correspondence, Ray. The only one who corresponds with me is Monkey Bread. I don’t correspond back to her as much as I should. She say I must think it still slavery time and a crime to write, ’cause I sho don’t write no letters. Or ain’t as many as she would want. You should have yourself a personal assistant, though. One of them Sanctuary workers oughta assist you in answering correspondence.
There ain’t really a lot of people that I trust—not with my personal correspondence, he said, and opened one of the letters that looked like Greek to me. But he read it.
I liked your story about the revolution, he said. But he still don’t say whether he think it a real story or a confabulatory story.
I think he’s going to say something else, but he looks back at them letters. This one looks like it in Chinese. He read that. Then he gets a little notebook on the table and starts jotting down notes. ’Nother letter got swiggles. He read that one. Then all the rest of the letters is English letters. I ain’t try to read them, though.
I’m just sitting there sipping my hot chocolate. I’m sitting there thinking about that song about somebody getting upon that train that ain’t got no ticket. Y’all know that song. Somebody singing about getting upon that train without no ticket. But you gets to ride some. I’m sitting there feeling like I ain’t got no ticket to ride a lot of people’s trains. And getting to ride some don’t seem like it enough. Then I’m sitting there scolding myself like a fool. How come I’m there thinking ’bout ain’t got no ticket to ride no train, when I gots me my own means of transportation. Get you a mule, fool, I heard somebody say when listening to that song. I ain’t got no ticket to ride nobody’s train. But I get where I wants to go just the same.
What are you humming?
Song about a train. I rose up and said I had to get back to work.
Stay, he said. Then he realized how that sounded. Stay with me.
I thought he wanted to make love again, but he didn’t. I sat there thinking about what Delgadina said about the burden of being an exemplary man and watched him read letters, then I got up and made us some more hot chocolate. When I comes back with the hot chocolate, I do spy on one of them letters. It begins. As a man of integrity, I appeal to you. . . . I think it’s one of them foreign people trying to write in English, so I don’t know whether he calling hisself the man of integrity or Ray. ’Cause y’all know about them dangling modifiers.
Then I’m thinking of Delgadina. She reading that Blake and then she look up at me. I’m thinking what it would be like if Martin Delany put a character like you in a book with a man like Blake. I know one thing, you’d be freer to express yourself, ’cause you don’t have the burden of being an exemplary woman.
Now I know some of y’all women of color wouldn’t want her saying that about y’all. But I know what Delgadina mean, so I ordered me a Budweiser. ’Cept I wouldn’t be talking no explicit sex scenes like some of them in the novels you reads, I said. I might not be exemplary, but I ain’t evil.
Aw, Mosq
uito, this is modern fiction, this ain’t the nineteenth century.
Then I’m sitting there watching Ray with them letters. He read them letters, and then he underline certain words in them letters and put certain words in his notebook. I knows what he’s doing ’cause them letters have got codes in them. I gots to tell y’all a little bit more about them codes, but I ain’t going to tell y’all everything. I sat there drinking hot chocolate whilst he read them letters.
You’s as manly as Luther, I says, watching him. But you ain’t as playful. That’s ’cause you’s got the burden of being an exemplary man.
He looked at me. Who’s Luther? Is that John Henry’s real name?
No.
Your ex-husband?
No. He a man in a play us children put on when we was childrens. I usedta go visit my cousin and there was this neighbor woman that wrote plays and we performed one of them called Luther. I remembers the description of him: Six feet tall, brown eyes, dark-complexioned, handsome, well built, strong and muscular, black hair in a crew cut. You ain’t as dark as him and you ain’t got no crew cut, but you’s as well built and manly. ’Cept he could be more playful ’cause he didn’t have the burden of being no exemplary man and no revolutionary personality. He’s a good man like you is, though. He returns from the Second World War on a furlough to romance his girlfriend. They’s truly in love and everything, but they’s a game and playfulness to they romancing, even though it is set during the Second World War.
PLAYING A GAME OF ROMANCE
Listen to the radio,
And the lights are turned down low,
Grab your partner, and let’s go,
A-playing a game of romance.
Take me to the picture show,
Still the lights are turned down low,
Light from the picture, make a glow,
Allaying a game of romance.
Its time this game got started,