After speaking briefly with Andrew, Jack obediently followed the priest.
✽✽✽
Dr. Bennett called Andrew into a small conference area saying, “Here’s the situation; Ms. Thayer doesn’t appear to have any significant injuries other than superficial cuts and abrasions and a mild concussion. However, she has experienced what often happens to people who have been close to an explosion; in layman’s terms, her eyes were burned by the flash.
“Although she was close to the explosion, the timing of the passing vehicle somewhat shielded her from its full force. We have taken precautions and have had an ophthalmologist evaluate her condition. We’re going to keep her for a few more days and then she can go home, but until the bandages can be removed from her eyes someone must be with her.”
Andrew listened attentively, and assured Dr. Bennett, “That’s good news, Doc, and she’ll be well taken care of. Now, may I tell her?” Andrew asked eagerly.
The doctor nodded, “Go ahead, I’ll follow up with instructions.”
✽✽✽
It was mid-morning when Father Ben and Jack arrived at the Center; Sister Ruth, Byron and Davey were busy unpacking and putting away supplies.
Seeing Father Ben, Sister Ruth eagerly seeking news asked, “How are Mrs. Thayer and Andrew, of course?”
“You will be happy to learn that Charlene is awake and Andrew is much better! But when she is released from the hospital she is going to need some care because her eyes have been injured—do you think she might stay at the Convent for little while ?”
Ruth’s face lit up, “Of course, Father; you didn’t even have to ask.”
“Well Andrew has volunteered to stay with her...” he didn’t finish.
“Well, of course not!” Sister Ruth exclaimed. “He’s much too busy and besides we can’t have that,” she stated.
Father Ben smiled, “That’s what I thought, but we’ll cross that bridge when Andrew comes to it; by the way, this is Andrew’s friend Jack Hubbard, Sister Ruth Myers, Byron Curtis and Davey Collins,” he said introducing each of them. “The Center would not run without these three people who keep me going too.”
Byron and Davey both smiled and shook Jack’s hand and Sister Ruth gave him a hug saying, “I’m so excited to meet you—I’ve read so many of your columns, I feel I almost know you.”
Sister Ruth just smiled, “You’re a good friend to Andrew and that makes you our good friend!” Jack relaxed.
Father Ben broke in, “Come into my office, Jack, we can talk there. I have a comfortable chair that just might fit you. Would you like some coffee?” Ben asked as Jack settled into a deep seated leather chair. “Andrew says that our coffee is terrible, but I drink tea so ...,” he smiled.
Jack requested coffee in spite of Ben’s warnings and Ben said, “I’ll have Davey bring us some.”
Noting Davey’s childlike mannerisms, Jack commented, “Father Ben, Davey seems to have found a niche here at the Center. He seems happy.”
“Yes, Davey is much help to me and to all of us here. You have noticed he has a slight disability, but he has a good understanding of what needs to be done. When Mr. Kelshaw was attacked there was no one else I could rely on. Sister Ruth and Byron had gone for the day; Davey had to stand in the gap for me, closing and locking the Center without anyone guiding him and he did it very well. I have come to look at him through new eyes.”
Davey brought the coffee and tea closing the door to the office on his way out.
Father Ben began, “I saw your face while you were conversing with Andrew about Mr. Kelshaw at the hospital, Jack. It was very disturbing to you. I know that he was your friend, but I sense there is something else.”
Jack sat motionless and silent, then looking at Ben, he sighed, “Yes, Father Ben, there is something else and I don’t know if I can even talk about it right now,” he said carefully setting his coffee mug on the desk.
Ben sat in a chair opposite Jack and studied him for a moment before responding, “My friend, you need some relief from the weight of the burden you carry. If you do not get it, I am afraid it will continue to grow and devour you. While I do not know if I am the one to help you, I do know that allowing light into our dark places is often a way to begin the healing process. And perhaps later, together, we can work on finding a solution.”
“It was partly the explosion...” Jack offered.
“You mean the event that triggered Sunday night? But you didn’t know it was Andrew and Charlene...so it was the event itself.”
Jack mumbled, “Yes, Something like that.”
There was a period of silence—Ben waited.
Jack was thinking, “This isn’t going to be easy.” He spoke softly, “I don’t know where to begin.”
“Why not talk about George Kelshaw? When was the last time you saw him?”
“In July in Bangkok.”
“Of this year?”
“Yes.”
“How did you find him?”
“He found me...he had been looking for me after he had escaped from the Pathet Lao. He had escaped with the help of Hmongs and a Chinese man, and had gone to Vientiane where we had originally set up a meeting place. I had left word with my contacts where I would be in Bangkok.
“He and his Chinese friend had to get out of Vientiane and they made it to Bangkok where he found me. George was afraid he was being followed; he wasn’t sure by whom, but it could have been the Pathet Lao. At the time George was very sick he had malaria and he had not recovered from the treatment he had received as a POW.
“He knew whoever was following him had trailed him and his Chinese friend to Bangkok, so we had to be very careful to protect him while he was regaining his strength. Even so, George had a task he felt driven to undertake before he would leave Bangkok.”
Father Ben asked, “He was a prisoner for how long?”
“Nearly five years, from 1973 to 1978. We were captured together.”
Father Ben stopped and looked incredulously at Jack, “You said, ‘we were captured’--were you a prisoner, Jack?”
“Yes, and it was my fault; at least it was because of me that George was captured,” he answered.
“What do you mean—your fault?” Father Ben asked.
“If he hadn’t been slowed down by me, he might have gotten away. I insisted that I go with him; I wanted an exclusive story—and I wanted to meet Vang Pao.”
“Getting an exclusive news story was your job, wasn’t it, Jack?”
“Yes,... initially, I was assigned to cover the peace negotiations, then Kelshaw came along and I saw it as an opportunity.”
“You acted as any good correspondent should, so blaming yourself is a fruitless exercise,” Ben said gently, and asked, “You got your exclusive story?”
“I guess I did,” Jack responded.
“Can you talk about what happened to you as a prisoner?” Ben pressed gently.
“It wasn’t just what happened to me, Father, but what happened to Kelshaw and others.”
Jack recounted the days and weeks in captivity. Then he spoke of George’s disappearance and how glad he was to eventually learn that George had survived.
“When were you released?” Father Ben asked.
“They didn’t release me, Father; I was rescued by the Hmongs, Vang Pao’s people. I don’t remember the rescue. The last I knew I was in a pit in the camp and I woke up in a hospital in a place called Long Tieng. One of the Hmong who stayed with me told me that George had survived, but that he was still a prisoner. Vang Pao had people watching and tracking where he was. I think they planned to rescue him if they could.
“Long Tieng was a strange place. I knew there were Americans there, I was treated by American doctors who patched me up...I guess I was in bad shape. But they really didn’t want to talk to me or answer questions other than about my medical condition. They didn’t even want me to go outside of the building when I was able. I’m sure they knew I was a correspondent.
“I hea
rd lots of aircraft landing and taking off I knew it had to be American planes, but I didn’t encounter one other American until they moved me out to Vientiane; then I saw a pilot and crew. Long Tieng was a secret airbase of some sort, probably CIA. A lot of the Hmongs would come in to see me and they were the only ones who tried to communicate with me.
“The last day there, General Vang Pao himself came to see me and tell me they would continue to track Kelshaw and the other prisoners. I found out that this place was also his headquarters. He told me then that the Pathet Lao was slowly getting closer and that Long Tieng may have to be abandoned. He didn’t volunteer any information and for once, I didn’t ask.
“Vang Pao told me that he would get word through to Kelshaw that I was safe and he also assured me that I would continue to get reports on Kelshaw through his people after I got back to Vientiane. That was important; Kelshaw and I had an agreement that I would send any information from him to Neil Klein. That was the agreement and I intended to keep it even if it was only to say he was still alive!”
Father Ben had listened intently and when Jack paused he interjected, “Let’s go back to your time as a prisoner, Jack, you went through some terrible experiences, are those memories what it is that is eating you up inside?”
“I’m not sure what’s eating me up, Father. Maybe it is...I don’t know,” Jack said ponderously. “I had always looked at war as a bystander...trying to remain above it all, neutral and objective. I did my job, wrote the stories, covered battles and events, sometimes barely getting away by the skin of my teeth. I always believed that I had to be dispassionate in order to present things in a true light. All that changed when we were captured. I realized how frightened I was...and that maybe the reason I had viewed myself as a bystander was that I was really a coward.”
Ben shook his head no, but allowed Jack to continue.
“When we were captured I found myself in hell and what was worse, because of me, Kelshaw was in a deeper hell than I and I couldn’t do anything about it. No amount of dispassionate explaining or neutrality made the slightest difference. I encountered men who were not just soldiers fighting for a cause, but men who hated so much! And the hate didn’t stop with us as Americans it was directed at their own countrymen.
“I don’t know what I feared more; whether I was afraid of what would happen to George and me personally, or knowing that my life, or whatever was left of it, was in the control of men with so much hate! That’s when I saw the others, prisoners, some of them Americans, who had been there for months maybe even years; some were barely alive and surviving in such terrible conditions and I got sick.
“I asked myself how, with all of the lessons in the history of the world, can there be such savagery left in we Homo sapiens? How can men who call themselves civilized, treat each other like that, Father?” Jack asked angrily.”
Ben shook his head in silence at the anguish that Jack was reliving, but he said nothing as Jack continued.
“You know what, Father? I learned to match their hatred; I, Jack Hubbard, objective Jack Hubbard, came to hate them just as much, maybe more! It was my passionate desire to literally see them burn in hell and never... ever..., receive any mercy from anyone. That was how I survived; it was the only way I could,” Jack’s intensity was mounting.
“And now when I think about it, it’s like a black hole inside my gut; I always thought I was better than that, but I’m not. You see, Father, deep down, I still hate them! And there isn’t enough booze in the world to make it go away!” Tears were running down Jack’s face as he struggled to regain his self control.
Father Ben’s hand was on Jack’s shoulder, “I can see, my friend, the terrible war you fight within yourself for having such feelings. It may surprise you to know that even I, a priest, am sometimes only one prayer away from many of the same emotions.”
“You, Father? How do you ...”
Father Ben answered Jack’s partially asked question. “Forgive yourself, my son; you must; the best part of you resists the hate or you would not inwardly struggle so.
“Many of us constantly fight the dark side of our humanity, but we can only overcome it if we face it and recognize that it is there. Forgiveness is the only way we can survive our world and ourselves. That’s why our Lord talked about it so much; He knew we had to operate in forgiveness.
“Jack, there are lessons to be learned, even from the most terrible circumstances. I believe that you will never again look at war or brutality as a bystander. I am sure you know there are no bystanders in life.”
Jack sat silent for a short time then nodded his head as he weighed the words of the priest. Taking a deep breath and exhaling he said with some uncertainty, “Perhaps you’re right, Father Ben; you have given me something to think about. Maybe talking with you has helped. Thank you,”
“My door is open whenever you want to talk, Jack,” Ben offered.
✽✽✽
Early Monday afternoon Andrew was mulling over the discovery of Lyle Ramsey’s private telephone number turning up in Monte Maxwell’s possession as he dialed Neil Klein’s number.
He was relieved to hear Neil answer on the second ring. “Klein”
“Neil, this is Andrew; I know you’ve already talked with Savalza about the explosion, but we have a new development that may help the investigation.”
“Yes, Andrew I have spoken with Savalza; actually I was about to call and see how you and Charlene Thayer are doing. What is this new development?”
“A telephone number was found in one of Detective Maxwell’s pockets. What makes it so intriguing is that the number is the private line of one of the principals of a powerful law firm here in Seattle, that of Ramsey & Carr. The number is that of Lyle Ramsey.
“If you recall you told me that you were sure that someone large and local was watching the handling of the Kelshaw murder? It occurs to me that the firm of Ramsey & Carr and Lyle Ramsey fit that category.”
“Yes, I do remember and it is intriguing. Ramsey & Carr is a large well known firm that handles a lot of government contracts; they have offices here in D.C. although they’re headquartered in Seattle. They are also in New York and San Francisco and I believe they have overseas representatives in Tokyo. Yes, Andrew I would definitely say that they would fit the category of ‘large and local’”
“Neil, the other piece that makes it more curious is this, Charlene told me that Coleman was coming to the West Coast on business and had moved his timetable ahead so he could talk with her about the letter. We know that his business had to be in Seattle because he didn’t leave town until he left for Washington on Saturday.”
“What you are suggesting is a possible tie between Coleman and Ramsey, Andrew; that raises some interesting questions. In any case I will caution you again to be careful. You and Charlene Thayer are lucky to be alive. Please don’t put yourselves at risk again. We are doing everything we can at this end...,”
Andrew cut him off, “Look Neil, I appreciate your concern for our safety, but until we get to the bottom of this rotten barrel I don’t think we’ll be very safe no matter what we do; and I have to do what I have to do.
“I didn’t tell you before, but I had a second interview with Coleman on Friday before he left town.”
“Aha...and how well did that ‘interview’ go and what did you gain by it?” Neil asked calmly, although Andrew noted the slight lowering of Klein’s voice that indicated he was less than pleased at the news.
“Neil, I’m a newspaper man and I’ve had a hunch about Coleman. I just thought I’d push a few of his buttons.
“I dropped in on him as he was packing to leave, so I asked him if his business in Seattle had only to do with Charlene Thayer or if there was something else; I was just fishing, his verbatim response was, ‘why I came to Seattle is personal and none of your business nor is it in any way connected to Charlene Thayer’... Then he told me to get out. However I didn’t accommodate him for a few more questions.
�
�In answer to your question, Neil, I gained an insight that the man has a lot more to hide than an affair with Lia Dupre`, although that obviously concerns him. He’s wound tighter than a tick and he’s very worried about something that I am certain has to do with Kelshaw.”
“Andrew, tell me you didn’t ask him about Lia Dupre`.”
“Can’t do that, Neil, I did ask him. He turned pale as a sheet, denied ever knowing anyone named Lia and told me I needed better information sources and then he threw me out, after a few more questions,” Andrew added lightly. “I didn’t mention that I had a very reliable source.”
“All right, Andrew, I can’t control your actions, but keep in mind that other people can be affected by whatever you do, so don’t risk too much. I know you don’t like Coleman, neither do I, even so don’t that let cloud your judgment; just remember a wounded bear is very dangerous...especially if he’s cornered.
“We’re still going through Martha’s luggage and some very interesting things are turning up. I’ll do a little follow-up on your information at this end. Give Ms. Thayer my regards.”
“Thanks, Neil, I will. Savalza is looking into the Ramsey-Maxwell connection at this end and I’ll be working with him as much as I can.
✽✽✽
It was nearly four o’clock when Andrew called the Seamen’s Center to report the news on Charlene to Father Ben and Sister Ruth. After telling them about the doctor’s prognosis he said lightly, “Taking care of her will be no problem, I’ll just stay at her house and...,”
At which point Father Ben said, “No, Andrew, Sister Ruth and I have another plan. Sister Ruth has suggested that Charlene stay at the Convent of the Sisters of St. Helena and they will take care of her.”
Andrew began, “But I...,”
Father Ben interrupted, “Sister Ruth and I agree that you are much to busy to undertake this task and I believe the Convent is a wonderful idea; that settles it then.”
While Rome Was Sleeping Page 37