Anna's Heart (Wilderness Brides Book 2)

by Peggy L Henderson

  Ethan wiped a hand over his damp face. Those had been the last moments he’d spent with his folks alive. When he’d returned to their camp, their wagon had been in flames and the bodies of his parents and baby sister lay on the ground, bathed in their own blood, and lifeless. His three younger brothers hid in the bushes, far enough away not to have been discovered.

  Anger had been Ethan’s first reaction. The guilt followed later. When he’d lain his little sister in her grave, his heart had turned to ice. She’d adored him, and he’d ignored her on her final day. She shouldn’t have died in the wilderness. She shouldn’t have even been in the wilderness. Why had his father brought his family to an unsettled place along the Missouri, away from the safety of a settlement and other people?

  Self-loathing and a steely resolve had steadily grown inside him. He’d felt weak and helpless, and consumed by guilt, making him rigid and unfeeling. Had he not been so impulsive, he could have done something to save his folks. He should have been there, rather than running through the woods, trying to prove he was no longer a young boy who had to listen to his folks.

  Ethan shook his head. Frustration made the muscles along his neck and shoulders taut. He would never be like his father and risk the lives of a wife and family in the wilderness.

  When Harley had found him and his brothers, he’d gladly made the decision to go with him into uncharted mountains. Here it was easier to forget everything he’d ever loved. He’d learned how to survive on his own and, aside from his brothers and Harley, would never have to face the kind of loss he’d experienced before.

  Ethan raked the fingers of his good hand through his hair. Sweat bathed his face again, like it had most of the night. The voices of his past hadn’t tormented him this much in a long time, but they’d been a constant presence during the long hours of the night while his body battled to rid itself of the puke weed he’d ingested.

  The mint Aimee Osborne had given him had soothed his stomach a little, but then the pain in his hand had taken over. Any water he’d drunk to quench his raging thirst had come up again moments later. Anger at Anna Porter for giving him the vile drink in the first place had teetered with guilt over his behavior where she was concerned. Truthfully, none of what she’d done to him yesterday had been on purpose, yet he’d made her feel as if she’d caused the injury to his hand, as well as acting like she’d deliberately switched the herbs for the tea Aimee had wanted him to drink.

  The cabin door creaked open, followed by loud voices. Aimee Osborne laughed along with Harley.

  “You’ll have to come visit soon, Harley. Sarah and Chase would be happy to see you.”

  “I bet them young’uns they got are growin’ up mighty fast.” Harley chuckled. “Chase done good, raisin’ four girls. Bet he’s glad he’s got hisself a son, though.” He cleared his throat, then asked, “Gotta be hard for Sam, raisin’ his little boy without a ma.”

  There was a slight pause before Aimee answered. “He takes Josh to spend a lot of time with his Shoshone relatives. Sam is raising him to know both his white and Indian heritage.”

  “Good thing, too,” Harley said. “I ain’t shore if I done the right thing by takin’ my boys away from all they knowd an’ raisin’ ‘em here in the mountains after their folks died. Mebe I oughta have took ‘em back ta where they come from. Trevor’s real smart. He coulda done good with some book learnin’.” He coughed. “They all growd up ta respect the mountains, but that’s all they know now.”

  Chairs scraped across the floor, and someone poured liquid into a cup. Harley’s voice lowered when he spoke again. “Ethan’s growin’ more surly every year, blamin’ hisself for what happened to his folks an’ not lettin’ go. He needs a family of his own ta move on, but he don’t listen ta what I say. ”

  “We all do the best we can for our kids, Harley.” Aimee’s voice had lowered, too. “You raised them well. They’re grown men, and have to make their own choices. Nathaniel has a nice family. Cora’s a real delight, and so are her sisters and brother.”

  Harley chuckled again. “They shore do brighten up the valley. Jes wish Anna warn’t leavin’. She’s lonely an’ somethin’s eatin’ at her that she don’t wanna talk about. She needs a man, an’ Ethan needs a woman, but neither one of ‘em see it.”

  Being privy to the conversation between Aimee and Harley bristled the hair at the back of Ethan’s neck. The old man had made it no secret for years that he wanted Ethan to find a wife. Now he was trying to match him up with Anna Porter? The thought was almost laughable.

  Harley had it all wrong. Ethan didn’t want, or need, a family. Even if getting hitched was ever something on his mind, which it wasn’t, Anna Porter was the last woman he’d ever consider. He’d sealed off his heart a long time ago, and that’s how it would remain.

  Good thing Anna had plans to leave the valley. At least the woman had some sense. She didn’t belong here. She was too fragile and soft to live in this environment. For that very reason, he hadn’t even responded to Harley the night before when the old man had suggested he take Anna to Oregon. He was not going to be held responsible for her safety. What if something happened to her along the way? He wasn’t going down that road again.

  Aimee laughed. “Your matchmaking efforts haven’t paid off, have they? You can’t force something like that, Harley,” she added softly. “I hope Anna finds what she’s looking for in Oregon. I was miserable when Daniel’s father forced me out of the mountains, thinking he was doing what was best for me. If Daniel hadn’t found me again, my life would have been completely different.”

  “Good thing ya come back,” Harley said. “Many men woulda gone under if ya hadn’t been around with yer healin’ skills.”

  “I can’t imagine living anywhere else.”

  Feet shuffled across the floor, and the kettle used to heat water clanked. Aimee’s voice drew closer to where Ethan still stood next to his bunk. He fumbled with his boots and pushed aside the curtain, stepping into the main room.

  “Oh, good. You’re awake,” Aimee said brightly, stirring a spoon in a cup at the table. She stopped and walked up to him. “How’s the hand?”

  “All right.” Ethan pushed his foot fully into his boot and straightened. “When am I gonna have full use of it again?”

  Aimee scrutinized him, her eyes wandering to his unbuttoned shirt. A knowing smile passed over her lips.

  “The less you use it for a while, the faster it will heal. I put a thick bandage on it to keep your hand as protected and immobile as possible. If you follow my instructions, it should be better again in a couple of weeks.”

  Ethan cursed silently. How was he going to get any work done for two weeks with only one hand? He couldn’t even button his shirt. Aimee stepped up to him, as if she’d read his mind. She reached for the buttons on his shirt, but he shot her a look, silently telling her he didn’t want her help. He’d known Aimee Osborne for years, but her motherly gesture at the moment only added salt to his wounds.

  “You’re going to have to swallow your pride and let people help you,” she said with an indulgent smile and dropped her hands. “I know it’s hard, but your family cares about you, and a few days of being at their mercy and letting them do things for you is better than a lifetime of a useless hand.” She reached up and patted his arm. “I left a pouch with willow bark and some mint on the table.” She pointed to the cup at the table. “There’s tea ready for you and Caroline and Trevor know how to change your bandage. Listen to them.” She jabbed her finger into his chest.

  Ethan nodded wordlessly. She was right, but he didn’t have to like it.

  She glared up at him. For her small stature, Aimee Osborne was an imposing woman. “Get some rest today. You still don’t look well. Keep chewing mint, and drink as much water as your stomach can handle.”

  “You leaving?”

  Aimee nodded. “I just wanted to check on you before we go. Daniel’s getting the horses ready. We’ve already said our goodbyes to everyone. As much as h
e wanted to get away from home for a while, he’s anxious to get back.”

  Ethan followed her out of the cabin. Daniel Osborne sat on his horse, his flintlock draped across his lap. The old trapper smiled at his wife, then raised his hand in a gesture of farewell.

  He nodded at Harley, who helped Aimee mount her horse, then turned his attention to Ethan. “Come visit when you can,” he said. “Sam and Chase will be glad for the company.”

  Ethan raised his bandaged hand. “Once I’m healed, I just might do that. Like you, it’ll do me some good to get away from this valley for a while.” He shot a quick look at Harley, who chuckled.

  “If’n ya go ta Oreegun, ya’ll get away fer a while, too,” the old codger mumbled.

  Ethan scowled and shook his head. Once Aimee and Daniel were out of sight, he headed back into the cabin without another word to Harley. He wasn’t going to let the old man corner him into another discussion about marriage and family again. Taking some of the mint the healer had left, he kicked off his boots and crawled back under the covers of his bed.

  Moments later – or was it hours? – Ethan startled awake, but his eyes remained closed to hold on to the images from his dream for a few moments longer. He moved his head from side to side and threw off the covers. Crisp air hit his sweat-soaked torso, cooling his heated body. He sucked in several quick breaths and wiped his hand across his damp face.

  He relaxed his head against his pillow. Images from his disturbing dream faded, but the memory lingered. His mother had called to him, begging him not to walk away.

  “Don’t make the same mistake again.” He’d turned to look at her. She’d smiled at him. Ethan had reached for her hand, but he’d been too far away. The more he’d tried to grasp for her, the further away she’d moved. She’d shaken her head, then had pointed at another woman next to her.

  “Don’t turn your back this time.” His mother’s voice echoed in his head, while pointing at the dark-haired woman standing beside her. Ethan had looked at her, confused. She’d raised her head. Anna Porter, with her sad eyes, smiling that soft, enticing smile.

  “Would you like some tea?” she’d asked, her words sounding hollow and far away.

  “Why are you doing this to me?” he grumbled.

  Ethan opened his eyes. He blinked, then frowned. Standing over him was the woman from his dream. Not his mother, but Anna Porter. She didn’t smile, as her eyes darted from his chest to his face.

  “Doing what? I heard you mumble in your sleep and came to see if you were all right. Would you like some tea?”

  Ethan groaned and shifted, then sat up fully in his bunk. He threw his legs over the side, forcing Anna to take a step back.

  “I made some meat broth, if you think your stomach is well enough to handle some nourishment.”

  Ethan ran his hand through his hair. He gritted his teeth and pushed his disturbing dream from his mind. Then he looked up at Anna.

  “I promise, I didn’t put anything unbecoming in the broth, or the tea.” She offered a tentative smile. Her face transformed instantly in front of him. Her soft brown eyes held a hint of hesitation, but there was patience and determination, and none of the wariness he’d seen the day before. Ethan blinked again to focus. What the hell was she trying to do to him, looking at him like that?

  “What do you want, Miss Porter?” he growled. “Did Harley put you up to this? You think you can sweet-talk me into taking you to Oregon?”

  She frowned and a spark of anger pushed aside the softness she’d shown a moment ago. Her hand shot to her hip. Her mouth opened, then she clamped her lips together. Her chest heaved when she inhaled deeply through her nose and she closed her eyes for a split-second. When she opened them again, the anger was gone, replaced by hurt.

  “I’ll ask your brother or Caroline to look in on you, Mr. Wilder. Clearly, your disposition hasn’t yet improved,” she said, her voice calm and even.

  She spun on her heels and stepped into the main room of the cabin. Without looking back at him, she pointed to the foot of his bed.

  “I found your dirty clothes in the barn. I know you don’t like anyone touching your belongings, so forgive me for having taken it upon myself to wash them, since I feel responsible for getting them dirty in the first place.” She pulled the curtain closed behind her with a swift yank and disappeared from view.

  Ethan cursed under his breath and sprang to his feet. Stars swirled in front of his eyes, and he swayed to steady himself, waiting for the dizziness to subside. Damn him for his impulsive rush to judge, and damn the woman for being so infuriatingly calm and genuinely caring. If she’d simply have a temper, he’d have something to latch onto and fight back, but her quiet demeanor left him at a complete disadvantage. There was no valid excuse to be angry with her.

  Ethan stared at the curtain. His mother’s words from his dream haunted him. Don’t turn your back this time. What did she mean by that? That he shouldn’t turn his back on Anna Porter, and offer to take her away from the valley to Oregon?

  Pushing aside the curtain, he stepped into the room just as Anna reached for the door handle to leave the cabin.

  “Miss Porter,” he called. Her back stiffened but she didn’t stop. Ethan rushed to her and reached for her arm before she could leave. She spun to face him, looking up at him with wide eyes.

  Ethan stared at her. Details about her face that he’d never noticed before came into focus. He’d never stood this close to her, not even yesterday after the muddy-water incident. Her skin looked smooth as silk, provoking an irrational need to touch her cheek. Good thing his hand was still wrapped around her arm and the other was bandaged or he might have given in to the impulse. Several freckles sprinkled her nose, probably from spending too much time out in the sun. Her amber eyes mirrored her soft and tender heart. Damned if they weren’t melting away the ice that enveloped his own.

  “Has it ever occurred to you, Mr. Wilder, that sometimes people might do things simply to be kind to someone else, without wanting something in return? The truth is, you are the last person I would impose upon to escort me to Oregon or anywhere else, for that matter.” She pulled her arm away and stepped outside.

  Ethan clenched his jaw. “Miss Porter, I owe you an apology.”

  Chapter Seven

  “He apologized?”

  Cora’s eyes widened at the same time a smile brightened her face. She set aside the wool shirt she held in her hand and shifted in her seat at the table in her cabin. A soft chuckle passed from her lips and she shook her head. “And you accepted?”

  “Of course I accepted.” Anna concentrated on her sewing, having already pricked her finger once with the sharp needle. Her stitches, which were usually neat and even, were barely passable this time. Good thing she was simply mending one of Travis’ socks.

  Her second encounter with Ethan Wilder in just as many days was still too unsettling. She’d chosen to eat supper with Josie in their cabin the night before, rather than with Cora and the Wilder men, so she hadn’t seen him since he’d told her he’d treated her unfairly.

  “What did he say?” Cora prodded, an eager look on her face.

  Anna pulled the needle through the sock, careful to stay away from her thumb. She shrugged. Her eyes lifted to Josie, who sat quietly at the other end of the table, cleaning her rifle.

  “He said he had no cause to blame me for the mix-up with the herbs, and he was sorry for calling me witless when I tossed the water at him. Then he thanked me for washing his clothes.”

  Cora’s smile widened. “I suppose for Ethan, that’s quite an apology. I knew that he wasn’t the ogre everyone makes him out to be.” She leaned forward in her chair. “Then what happened?”

  Anna paused in her work. She glanced at her friend. Her forehead scrunched. “What do you mean? Nothing happened. I accepted his apology and left.”

  “He didn’t say anything else?” Cora’s brows rose, as if she was expecting a more elaborate answer.

  Anna shook her head. “
No. I was ready to walk out of the cabin, since he woke in a bad mood. I believe he may have thought I was someone else for a moment, the way he looked at me before he fully came to his senses. I only went to the cabin to bring him some broth and his clothes.”

  She’d heard a quiet moan from his bunk when she’d come to the cabin. The curtain separating his area from the main room had been left open and she’d seen him toss in his bed. He’d even reached his hand out to someone who wasn’t there.

  Unsure of what to do, Anna had gone to check on him since no one else was in the cabin. Sweat had covered his face and torso, and she’d almost left to find Trevor when he’d woken and stared up at her. Offering him some tea had been the first thing to come to her mind at that moment.

  Cora chuckled. “I thought Caroline and Trevor were in charge of Ethan’s recovery.”

  Anna blew air from her mouth. “I still feel responsible about what happened to him. After all, I gave him the wrong tea that made him sick. That had to be awful, especially after the accident with his hand.” She glanced at her lap to avoid eye contact with Cora. “I thought a lot about what you told me, about what happened to Ethan’s family. It doesn’t excuse his behavior, but at least I can understand it a little better. I truly think he’s closed himself off from everyone for so long, he doesn’t know how to be any other way.” She ventured a glance at her friend.

  Cora smiled, staring at her as if she could read her mind.

  “What?” Heat crept up Anna’s neck and into her cheeks. The reaction to Cora’s knowing smile was unexpected. She hadn’t done anything improper. She’d simply wanted to ease her guilt and make sure that Ethan was all right. She couldn’t have known that he’d be asleep in his bunk, or that the curtain had been pulled back, letting her see him a second time without his shirt on.

  The heat in her cheeks grew in intensity. Anna sat straighter in her chair. Although Cora knew her well, she wasn’t a mind reader. She couldn’t have guessed at the images that lingered in her thoughts.