by Diane Allen
‘Fixed me up with Clifford! He raped me on our wedding night – there was no love shown at all, that night and every night for a month, and after. He was desperate for a son to show to his father before he died. And then, when I didn’t deliver, he slept with every woman in the dale. I was ashamed of myself; I couldn’t hold my head up anywhere we went, because I knew everyone was talking about us.’
‘Oh, Kitty, I thought you were happy, that you’d got your man and the home you’d always wanted.’
‘What I wanted! What I wanted was to do what you did: leave the dale and make a life for myself, not be pawned off in a deal between families.’ Kitty slammed her spoon down, her eyes filling with tears. ‘Then the final insult came when, one night, he brought Tobias home – or “Bastard” as he calls him now. He tried to tell me that he’d found him nearly dead in a ditch, but I knew it was the baby of one of his whores. He thought he would be bringing me comfort. The only comfort I got was when the child was asleep and I prayed for the Lord to take him, instead of me having to see his face every day.’ Kitty sobbed, her face reddening and her chest heaving. She’d shut up her feelings for years, with no one to talk to, and now they were rushing out like pent-up demons.
‘Shush, Kitty, think of the child. He shouldn’t be hearing such talk. It’s a wicked thing you say. He is innocent in all this – it’s his parents who are to blame.’ Daisy reached out for her sister’s hand and squeezed it tight.
‘Oh! He’s heard worse – things a child’s eyes and ears should never see or hear. Clifford has made sure of that. He takes delight in abusing the child; you see how he sleeps, like a dog under the table, fed only on leftovers. He’d have been better off dead years ago, but he is a determined soul, I give him that,’ Kitty sobbed.
‘Well, I’m here now. We will be stronger together. We’ll stand up to Clifford, now that I know your true feelings, and I’m sorry if I’ve caused you any pain.’ Daisy looked across at her sister. She couldn’t let Kitty know her own story: what her parents had really done to her, and the death of her baby. Daisy decided not to tell her sister about her marriage to Bob, and simply told her about seeking service in the Mattinson household. She thought the less she told her sister about her true life, the better it would be all round. They both needed a roof over their heads, so they both had to play Clifford’s game and hope that none of their true feelings were found out. She told Kitty about the wicked Angelina and her downtrodden husband, and about Jim and his decision to marry Susie.
‘I think it was the decision of Jim to marry Susie that really brought you home, not your illness, sister.’ Kitty held Daisy’s hand. ‘I know that look in your eye – you used to look at Clifford the same way, and I used to get jealous.’
‘I did not. He was yours, and all the world knew it.’ Daisy blushed.
‘Happen not. But I’m right about this Jim. Even though we’ve been apart a while, I can still tell when you have a soft spot for a man.’ Kitty sniffed and rose from the table.
‘He is a good man. He used to call me “Daisy petal” and make me laugh.’
‘There are some good men out there, I’m sure, but the tarts always seem to win them. One day it will be your turn, Daisy petal,’ laughed Kitty.
‘It doesn’t quite have the same ring to it!’ Daisy hugged her sister. ‘We’ll stand strong; we’ve got each other now.’
‘Aye, happen so. Only time will tell.’
16
‘Two bloody women in the house and I still don’t get my bloody dinner on time, you useless bitches.’ Clifford sat, cursing, at the table. ‘And where’s the bastard at? Where have you put his bed?’
‘Daisy thought he’d be better in the barn above the cow. It’s colder there and he’s out of your eyesight, Husband. Out of sight, out of mind – isn’t that what they say?’ Kitty poured her agitated husband a drink, and urged Daisy on to make haste with the dinner.
‘I thought he smelled, and that you wouldn’t want him under your feet.’ Daisy smiled at Clifford as she poured the mutton stew into a bowl, urging him to get some bread to go with his meal. ‘Besides, I’ve taught him to milk the cow – he’s nearer the job there, and it’s no good having a dog and barking yourself, as the expression goes.’
‘Uhh! Never thought of that. Perhaps I should have married you instead of that useless bugger.’ Clifford grunted and slurped the potato and mutton down his chin. The grease dribbled onto the collar of his clean, white shirt.
Daisy and Kitty looked at one another; they’d take the insults thrown at them as long as it gave one or the other peace.
‘I’ve Oversby and his friends coming over tonight. He owes me in cards, but I don’t want you womenfolk around. You’ll only turn their heads and give me bad luck. Get yourselves to bed and out of the way, once you’ve laid out something for us to eat.’
Kitty looked at Daisy. Both of them knew that meant a night of rowdy gaming and bawdy songs and, for Kitty, a loveless session of sex.
‘They must be keen on their cards, coming in this weather,’ said Daisy innocently, knowing full well the conversation she had overheard.
‘Aye, the weather’s cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey all right, but a game of cards lifts the spirits. And besides, we have hunt business to talk about, so mind you stay out of the way.’ Clifford spat out a piece of neckbone from his stew before continuing to eat.
Kitty bade Daisy join her in the pantry. ‘Take Tobias into your room tonight. They sometimes have sport with him, and I wouldn’t want to see him hurt.’
She walked back into the kitchen. Standing with her hands on her hips, she said, ‘There’s some cold meats, bread and cheese in the pantry for your guests. When are you likely to be going to Hawes or Sedbergh? We could do with some supplies.’ She was worried that the flour barrel was getting low and the sugar block was disappearing.
‘When I’ve some brass, which – if I’m lucky – will be tonight. I’ll show that bastard Oversby that I can play cards.’ Clifford grunted.
‘Well, I hope you win, else it’s going to be meagre pickings until spring.’
Daisy didn’t want him to win, for his ego would be unbearable, but at the same time the larder was empty. If it came to it, she’d spend some of her savings. After all she did have a roof over her head.
‘Light me the fire in the parlour before you’re away to your bed. It’s too cold to be in that back room without some warmth. You can lay the food out on the dresser in there and all – save my legs. As you say, why do it yourself when you’ve a dog to do it.’
Daisy looked at the fire crackling in the grate and pulled the curtains around the oil lamp that was burning brightly in the window. She’d laid the food out, and now she’d wait on Clifford’s guests before sneaking down the stairs for Tobias, to hide him in her room.
‘Well, he’s kept you quiet, the old dog.’ A portly grey-haired man pushed open the door and grinned at Daisy. ‘You must be that plain skinny sister that was at the wedding. You’ve certainly filled out now. Middleton said you were staying, but he didn’t say how much you’d changed.’
Daisy curtsied. She recognized the voice – it was Joshua Oversby from Yore House. As he’d said, he had been at Kitty and Clifford’s wedding; a little slimmer then and a little younger, but he’d been loud then, as he still was now. She should have recognized his voice on the first night she had heard it, but it had been buried in memories of the past. She knew him of old to be a big landowner with influence in the dale, but he was also known to either mend or break people with his contacts. She blushed as her skirts brushed beside him, in her hurry to leave the gambling den.
Oversby’s hand reached out and grabbed her arm. ‘What’s the rush? We could have a little drink and a conversation together, that would be most agreeable.’ His ruddy cheeks wobbled as he smiled at the blushing Daisy.
‘I’m afraid my sister awaits – she is in need of me.’ Daisy tried to pull her arm away from the grip of his thick, sausage-l
ike fingers.
‘Not half as in need as I am. I could do with a kiss from them red lips – it’s a while since I bedded a woman.’
Oversby pulled her close, his face inches from hers, so close that she could smell on his breath the onions he’d had for his supper.
‘Let her go, you animal. You’ve come to play cards, not shag my sister-in-law. Seek your sport elsewhere tonight.’ Clifford entered the room unexpectedly and glared at Oversby.
‘I see how it is. Tired of the wife, so now you’re bedding her sister. Two women under one roof – I’ve got to give you credit, Middleton, you live a full life.’ Oversby let go of Daisy’s arm and patted her on her bottom. ‘It’ll have to be the urchin afterwards that gives me my pleasure. Where is the little bastard? You’ve moved him from under the kitchen table.’
Daisy turned. ‘You leave that li’l child alone.’ She’d have hit him if she’d had the strength to hurt him.
‘Whoa! A woman with spirit. By God, Middleton, you are blessed. Perhaps not with brass, but with plenty of other pleasures.’
‘Shut up, Oversby! Daisy, go to your room and lock it, and then I don’t have to make excuses for my so-called friends.’ Clifford scowled and poured a drink for his visitor as the third member of the party arrived.
‘By gum, we’ve had some sport already, Isaac. Middleton’s got himself a mistress under the same roof as his wife. You must just have passed the pretty bitch.’
‘Shut your mouth, Oversby. You don’t know what you are saying.’
Daisy could hear Clifford’s voice as she climbed the stairs. Joshua Oversby was revolting. She prayed she’d get to Tobias safely and that, once inside her room, they’d both be safe. She sat on her bed and listened to the low rumble of voices below her for what seemed to be an age. It was pitch-black outside and her stub of candle flickered in the draught from the window. Time to pick up her courage.
She unlocked her bedroom door and crept along the landing and down the dark stairs, along the passageway, glancing only once at the three men playing cards, smoking and drinking. She ran across the cold kitchen flags, with the dying embers of the fire as her only light, and unbolted the back door into the cold night’s air. She quickly made her way into the adjoining barn by the light of the full moon.
‘Tobias, Tobias, it’s me, Daisy. Come here, I need you,’ she whispered and jumped slightly as the cow in the byre acknowledged her presence with a steady low moo. Then she heard a movement above the hayloft and heard Tobias coming to her. ‘Tonight you sleep in my room – it’ll be warmer there.’ The little boy nodded his head and clung to Daisy as they crept back into the house like mice, up the stairs to Daisy’s room, locking the door safely behind them.
‘Do you know that man, the one who tethered his horse in the barn tonight?’
‘Yes, I don’t like him,’ Tobias whispered. ‘He makes me do things I don’t like to do.’
‘Shh . . . You don’t have to tell me. He’ll not be doing that again. I’m here now, and I’ll look after you.’ Daisy sat on the bed and cuddled him. How could anyone treat a child so? Even Freddie back in Leeds had not been abused; he may have had a hard life, but he was loved. ‘Come on, Tobias, jump into my bed and we’ll keep one another warm. It’ll be a treat for both of us.’ Daisy pulled the little urchin towards her, putting her arm around him as she pulled the covers over them. She watched as his eyes slowly closed. Did his mother ever think of him? Who was she, and where was she now? She would be his mother tonight; and tonight he would sleep safely in her bed.
Daisy awoke with a start, the sound of raised voices from outside her window making her lie there in fright.
‘Damn it, Middleton, where is the little brat you promised me?’
‘Get yourself home – you’re waking the whole household.’ Clifford Middleton swayed uneasily at the garden gate as he watched his wife come to the window with a lit lantern to see what all the commotion was. He didn’t agree with Joshua’s fascination with young boys, but he’d no option but to go along with him. He needed his credit; and besides, he’d no feelings for the boy.
‘Aye, come on, Josh. Have your way another night. I’m away to my bed.’ Isaac was already mounted on his horse, and it was getting frisky with the noise.
‘If he’s hiding in that barn, I want him found.’ Oversby staggered over to the mounting blocks at the side of the barn and sat down firmly on them. He felt sick; he’d eaten too much and had definitely drunk too much.
‘Get on your horse, and we’ll come back another night. Remember we’ve a hunt meeting tomorrow, so you need a clear head.’ Isaac grabbed hold of the reins of Oversby’s horse and pulled it in front of Joshua, to enable him to mount.
‘The little bastard – he’s hiding.’ Oversby climbed the steps and slouched on his horse’s withers, before climbing onto its back.
‘Thank God for that! See you tomorrow, Middleton – if he makes it back,’ Isaac shouted as he steadily paced out of the yard of Grouse Hall, with Joshua Oversby dutifully following.
Clifford raised his lit lantern in acknowledgement and watched the drunken pair make their way into the darkness of the night. He was wondering the same as Oversby: where was the little bastard? He’d go and have a look for him – he must be hiding in the barn. Clifford waved his lantern around the cow and horses that were standing quietly there, wondering why their night was being disturbed. He looked up towards the hayloft and stumbled between the animals, tripping over the cobbled byres and landing in the warm, soft hay. ‘Come here, you bastard, where are you?’ He lifted the lantern and looked around him. His head was spinning and his eyes felt heavy; the warmth of the animals and hay was making him sleepy. ‘Don’t worry – I’ll find you. And when I do . . . I’ll get you, I’ll get you tomorrow.’ Clifford yawned and felt his eyes closing and his head dropping onto his chest. It was time to sleep.
Daisy had lain still until she had heard the noise of Oversby and his sidekick leaving, and then she lay waiting for the noise of Clifford climbing the stairs. She stared into the darkness, listening to every noise that the night made and to the soft breathing of the little boy lying next to her. The night was silent – not even the hoot of a hunting owl could be heard. Suddenly her senses were awoken; there was a smell of smoke filling the room. She rushed from her bed and lit her bedside candle. Looking around the room, she saw that smoke was seeping through the gap in the wall from the barn. She grabbed her dressing gown and shook the sleeping Tobias awake.
‘Quick, Tobias, quick! The barn is on fire – we must save the animals.’ Daisy unlocked her door and hammered on Kitty’s bedroom. ‘Kitty, come quickly. The barn’s on fire. Is Clifford in bed with you?’
Kitty opened the door almost immediately. ‘No, he never came to bed. Where is he?’ Both women and the boy ran down the stairs, gathering bowls, buckets and pitchers from the kitchen as they flew out into the yard and round to the barn.
Flames were just starting to lick at the doorway, and the sound of horses and cows going mad with fear filled the air. Daisy drenched herself with icy water from the horse-trough, not even feeling the cold as she rushed into the fire-filled barn to release the terrified animals. She threw the bucket of water she was carrying at the heart of the fire as she quickly untied the cow and horses, which didn’t need the encouraging slap across their flanks to tell them to get out of the blazing barn. Kitty and Tobias rushed back and forth from the trough with buckets of water, while Daisy caught her breath after being in the smoked-filled building.
Daisy gulped. ‘Clifford’s in there. I’ll have to go back and save him – he’s out cold.’ She coughed and bent double, trying to get her breath.
‘Leave him – we are better off without him.’ Kitty stood for a minute with her bucket full, not daring to think about the words she had just said.
‘I can’t. He’s Tobias’s father – he can’t be all bad.’ Daisy watched Kitty as she struggled with her thoughts. ‘Come on, Kitty. I might be a bit dim, but I’
m not blind: Tobias is the spitting image of Clifford – anyone can see that.’ She turned and ran back into the barn, then grabbed hold of Clifford’s legs and tried to pull him, but he was too solid. She turned around to see Kitty standing behind her. Kitty grabbed Clifford’s other foot and together they pulled him out of the barn onto the cobbles.
‘He’s a heavy bastard!’ puffed Kitty. ‘Leave him, but let’s save the barn. If he lives, he lives; but I need my home.’ The three of them paused for a second, looking at the body of Clifford, whose left arm and hand were badly burned, before getting back to saving the barn. Clifford was nothing to any of them, but they needed a roof over their heads.
Bucket after bucket was thrown at the devouring fire. The two women and Tobias were exhausted, but by the light of day they had saved the barn and their home. The last few dying wisps of smoke rose into the air as Kitty, Daisy and Tobias gathered around Clifford while he moaned in pain and spluttered for breath.
‘He’s alive then. I hope he’s grateful to us for saving him.’ Kitty looked down at her husband, unimpressed that he was still in the land of the living.
‘I suppose we’d better get him into bed and comfortable. Should we send for the doctor from Hawes?’ Daisy looked at her sister.