His first words were: ‘I wasn’t drunk,’ even though I don’t think anybody had gone out of the way to say he was.
Geoffrey: Before we start properly, I want to make it clear that I’m only talking to you because my son thought it would be a good idea. It sounds like there are lots of wrongs to right and corrections to make. Sloppy work on your part, from what I’ve heard.
That holiday was supposed to be a time for my wife to enjoy what was going to be her last trip abroad. Obviously, things didn’t quite turn out like that – but I will absolutely not countenance anyone saying I was drunk on that first night. I admit I’d had a couple of glasses of wine but nothing more than I might have had on a normal evening at home. I’ve read the police report, for what it’s worth, and it doesn’t mention alcohol.
Emma: Dad said that he didn’t remember what happened. He was looking out over the cliffs and then heard the wind whistling. Next thing he knew, he was in a hospital bed.
Geoffrey: There’s not much to say. I was on the cliff and then I was in that hospital. Accidents happen. No big conspiracy.
Emma: It felt like an anti-climax. The man in the village told me he’d heard voices on the cliffs – but it’s true that sound echoes and amplifies around the cove. He could have been wrong.
I felt deflated, like I’d been chasing something that wasn’t there.
Geoffrey: I’m still here, aren’t I? Cliffs: nil, Geoffrey McGinley: one.
Emma: I wanted to ask more – but then the door opened and the doctor came in. It didn’t take long for things to be decided: Dad was going back to the hotel.
Chapter Thirty-Four
THE DISHEVELLED NON-GIRLY-GIRL
Emma: I went into the main hotel when we got back and took the lift up to Julius’s room. It was early when I knocked on his door, but he was up, watching TV with the girls. I told him that Dad was up and about. It was an obvious slip of the tongue, a stupid thing to say. I blamed it on the early morning and said that what I meant to say was that Dad would be on his way back to the hotel once he’d had the proper paperwork to clear him. It was something to do with needing documents for the airline.
I remember Julius blinking at me, like I’d told him the sky had turned green. He was surprised and I think confused that it was me who’d been at the hospital instead of him. He asked how Dad was.
Julius: It was a surprise to see Emma that morning.
She’s never been a girly girl – and I’m not saying that she should be, or anything like that. I’m a feminist, you know. I love women.
But there was something a bit… dishevelled about her that morning. Like she’d slept on the floor, or something like that. I don’t think she’d been into the main hotel since that night she babysat the girls, plus she’d skipped dinner the night before. I didn’t know if we’d fallen out, or if we were getting on. It’s always difficult to tell with her.
Emma: Did he really use the word ‘dishevelled’? I don’t remember what I was wearing. I suppose Mum rushed me up that morning. Does it matter? Why would it matter?
Julius: You have to understand that was the starting point. My scruffy sister was unexpectedly knocking on my door.
Emma: Julius was acting a bit strangely. It’s hard to tell you exactly why, other than that he kept looking past me along the corridor. He said something like the girls would be happy Dad was coming back. It made me realise that I should’ve spent more time with them since that night I babysat. We’d had those few minutes on the cliff edge, but that was unexpected and I hadn’t gone out of my way to plan anything with them.
I regret that. I was wrong.
Julius: I tried to help Emma. I asked her to babysit because I wanted her to rebuild her relationship with Amy and Chloe. Then what happened? She looked after them for one night and essentially ignored them the rest of the holiday. Don’t ever let her tell you that the family isolated her: she isolated herself.
Emma: Julius asked if Dad had said anything about what happened on the cliff. It was a fair question, considering it was more or less the first thing I’d asked Dad.
I told him that Dad didn’t know what had gone on. I probably could have left it there – but… I didn’t.
Julius: I saw it in her eyes: conspiracy time.
Emma: I told him that I’d found Daniel in my cottage the day before. Julius reeled a little at that and asked why.
Julius: Emma said she’d found something of Dad’s and that Daniel wanted it.
It sounded, well… mad, I suppose. Such an odd thing to say. I asked what she’d found and she said: ‘I’m not sure I should say.’
Emma: I didn’t know if I could trust him. It was only the day before that I found out he’d lost his job and had been lying about it.
Julius: She ended up saying: ‘It’s just something Daniel wants,’ as if this was perfectly normal. She’d basically told me she’d stolen something from Dad – and that Daniel wanted it back. What did she expect me to say?
Emma: When it’s put like that, I realise it doesn’t sound great. All I can say is that it wasn’t as clear-cut as that. I knew lots of little bits of information that nobody else seemed to know and I made the best decisions I could in the moment.
It’s easy to say I was wrong when you can look back on things – but you could make that observation about all sorts of choices. There’s a whole scientific theory about it, called hindsight bias. Say you go into a lake to save a drowning dog. If you drown yourself, it was a terrible idea. If you save the dog and get back to shore, then you’re a hero. It’s the same decision, but it’s viewed through the outcome.
You can say I made the wrong decisions – but what if things had gone differently in those final twenty-four hours?
Julius: …
Really? Dogs in lakes? Is that the best she has…?
Emma: Julius said he was glad we were talking again. I said something like: ‘Did we ever stop?’
Julius: She’s my sister and there was a double punishment in losing her son and then going to prison. I’m not a monster. I wanted her to be an aunt to Amy and Chloe. Our estrangement, if you want to call it that, was pretty much enforced because she was behind bars.
Emma: I told him that he could have visited me at any time. He said he didn’t want to take up any of my visit times when other people could have seen me. He mentioned Mum, but I must have raised an eyebrow or something because he admitted then he didn’t want to go to a prison.
Julius: Can you blame me? It’s not like we were really close before that. What would we have ever talked about? Surely it was better to let Mum have the visiting slots?
Emma: He said that the twins ask after me and that he’d talk to Simone about seeing if I could be a bigger part of their lives when we got back to the UK.
…
He made me cry.
Julius: …
Obviously, I know what happened after that – but it was a genuine moment that morning. Amy and Chloe wanted to see more of her and it seemed like they were good for her, too. I thought that Emma might be able to tag along on some weekend trips, that sort of thing.
There were tears in Emma’s eyes and I can’t pretend that I wasn’t uncomfortable. There was a spare toilet roll on a shelf by the door, so I passed it to her and she blew her nose. It led to an awkward moment where she was holding this snotty tissue and didn’t know what to do with it. It made us both laugh.
…
I guess that was the last time we really enjoyed one another’s company. The last time we were a proper brother and sister. I didn’t know it then, of course. If I did, perhaps I’d have thought of something better to talk to her about. If we’d have been flying home that day, everything would have been different.
Emma: I wanted the thing he was offering. I wanted to be a fun aunt. I suppose I wanted to be part of a family.
Julius: It was Emma who chose not to have that.
Emma: We’d been talking for a while and the twins were obviously wondering what was going
on. Amy came to the door and squished around her dad. She asked if I was going to be at dinner that night, because she’d missed me the night before. I said that I would. She asked if I’d sit next to her on the plane when we went back, and I replied that I thought she’d want to be by Chloe.
She lowered her voice to a whisper and there was a glint in her eye as she said I could sit in between them.
Julius: Amy came to see what was going on and asked if Emma could sit next to her when we flew home. I said: ‘We’ll see,’ because I thought Mum might want to be with the girls.
Emma: Julius told Amy that we were having a conversation and that she should go back to the telly. He said he’d be back soon and then they could go to the pool. She protested in the way kids do when they want to be involved in the things grown-ups are doing – but she did as she was told, which left Julius and me alone in the doorway again.
Julius: After that, Emma left and I didn’t see her again until the cottages.
Emma: Julius moved closer and pulled the door half-closed. He leaned in and whispered, asking if we should tell the police about Daniel.
I think I was surprised more than anything. He had seemed almost dismissive of everything I had been saying – but then he brought up the police.
I said: ‘Tell them what?’ – and Julius said that Daniel was the person who’d gain the most if Dad had died. That Daniel had been in my room and that something was clearly going on.
Julius: That didn’t happen. Emma left after Amy came to the door.
Emma: I said there was no evidence that anything untoward had happened. Bear in mind, I’d never told Julius about the fake licence, or anything else.
He said that we’d be leaving in twenty-four hours and that, if we didn’t tell the police about Daniel now, then it would be too late. I said that I wasn’t sure Daniel had pushed Dad. That even Dad himself wasn’t sure what had happened. That it might have been a fall, in the same way Alan had fallen.
Julius: Why would I say any of that to her?
Emma: He stepped away after that and I was so conflicted. There was a while when I thought Dad had been pushed and then a time when I was sure he hadn’t. Everything had got caught up with the fake licence I found, along with the bank accounts – not to mention seeing Scott and the documentary crew. It felt like a puzzle to be solved and then, on that morning, it turned into a jigsaw that was already complete.
Except that Julius was complicating it. I wondered if I was right in the first place.
…
After Julius stepped away, he said: ‘At least Dad’s OK…’
That was easy to agree with.
We stood for a moment and then he nudged the door back open and stepped away. He winced again and clutched his side as he was doing that.
I started to ask if he was OK – but it was quickly obvious that he didn’t want me to know anything was wrong. I barely got the sentence out before he closed the door in my face.
It was much later that I realised it was that tiny moment that saved me. If it hadn’t been for that, I’d be dead.
Chapter Thirty-Five
THE AWKWARD, CONTEMPTUOUS TRIANGLE
Emma: I spent about an hour by the pool late in the morning, probably around eleven. Everybody who wants to sunbathe is already up and reserving beds by around seven, so the only spot I could find was near the shallow end, where there was no sun until late in the afternoon.
I read a bit of a book, but, even in the shade, it was so hot that I couldn’t think properly. I’ve always been like that. I like those autumn and spring days where there’s a breeze and it never gets above fifteen or sixteen degrees. Sunshine was more Dad’s thing, probably Julius’s as well.
I said hello to Amy and Chloe – but they were enjoying their final day on the slides, so it wasn’t much more than that. They wanted me to join in, but my days of waterslides, rollercoasters and that sort of thing are long behind me.
It was probably around midday when Victor appeared out of nowhere. I was on a sunbed and he stood over me, before nudging the bed with his knee.
I didn’t recognise him at first. He was unshaven, plus wearing shades and a hat I’d not seen before. He was also topless, with impressively tanned arms and so much chest hair, it almost looked like he was wearing a vest.
I have no idea what he’d been getting up to in the days since Claire left, but, from the look of him, it likely involved a lot of free booze.
…
Honestly, there was something about him that day that was unquestionably charming. I’d never seen him like that before. He was wearing sunglasses and a fedora that, surprisingly, didn’t look ridiculous.
The crackhead rock star look suited him, if you want the truth.
Victor told my chest that something was happening by the cottages and that he’d been sent to find me.
Julius: Everyone was waiting at the cottages except one person.
Emma: When I got there with Victor, Dad was in the middle of a small circle of people. Mum, Julius, the twins, Daniel, Liz and the hotel manager were all there, surrounding Dad in his wheelchair.
It felt like this was some sort of organised thing – but nobody had told me what time Dad was returning, let alone that we were having a mini get-together to celebrate.
Daniel: Typical, wasn’t it?
Emma: They were obviously waiting for me. I was feeling out of place and underdressed. Victor had surprised me and I’d forgotten to grab a towel before we headed off to the cottages.
I looked across to Dad and that ring was on his finger, as if it had never left. Meanwhile, Victor was standing a couple of spaces away, as if we were one big, happy family.
When I was in place, Dad lit up, he wheeled himself across to the manager and goes: ‘Looks like you have to fall off a cliff to get a good room in this place!’
Everyone laughed, including me. It was a good line.
He wasn’t quite the same as I’d seen him that morning, though. I suppose the painkillers had started to wear off.
There was a blanket across his legs and something a little frail about the way he spoke. I wondered what the doctor might have said to him in private, after I left. Whether he’d been told about the timeline before he might be able to walk, or – perhaps – if he’d ever be able to walk again.
I’ve said before that Dad would never have admitted to any of that. If there was any fear about the state of his health, then he wouldn’t have showed it openly – and definitely not in front of a crowd.
I remember him playfully nudging the manager with his elbow and saying he hoped there would be some good wine for dinner that night.
The manager started to reply, but Mum cut him off, saying that Dad wasn’t allowed to drink with the medication he was on. Daniel took that moment to open his mouth and come out with something like: ‘One never hurt anyone.’ It got a laugh, but then he glanced to me and said: ‘It’s two that’s the problem.’
Julius: It probably was out of order.
Daniel: It was an honest mistake and nothing was meant by it. I was greeting an old friend, that’s all. This snowflake generation wants to be offended by everything.
Emma: Everyone knew what he meant, probably even the twins. There was a long, long silence and then Dad clapped his hands and said he was grateful for everyone coming out to greet him.
I think the manager probably wanted to get out of there, so he said he had things to do and rushed back towards the main hotel. That was the cue for people to start looking around and head back to whatever they were doing. Victor didn’t hang around: he was already past me and on the way back towards the pool when Daniel clamped a hand on Dad’s shoulder and said: ‘Can I have a word?’
There was something so pronounced about it, so deliberate, that it was obvious he wanted me to see.
I could have left, but I think I knew how things were going to play out. Julius and the girls went back to the pool, while Liz, Mum and me stood in this awkward, contemptuous triangle, with n
one of us saying anything.
Dad wheeled himself away to the corner of the cottage and, all credit to Daniel, he actually managed to crouch as he spoke to Dad. At most, they spoke for a minute and, as soon as they were done, Dad turned and looked right at me. Daniel was watching me, too.
When he came back towards us, Dad was being deliberately cheery. He thanked me for visiting him in the hospital, and for helping Mum, plus looking after the girls.
It’s the compliment sandwich, isn’t it? Give all the good information up front, slide the turd into the middle, and then finish with something like: ‘By the way, I love that top you’re wearing.’
Dad asked Liz and Mum to excuse us and then I was left waiting as they headed back towards the pool.
It was only Dad, Daniel and me on the lawn outside the cottages when he said it.
Daniel: Geoff asked Emma if she was OK. She had been behaving erratically and everyone was worried.
After the Accident: A compelling and addictive psychological suspense novel Page 19