by Ivy Jordan
I wasn’t about to end up in the same situation as Molokai, where every fuckin’ tourist that visited the island ended up on the path towards my cabin.
“So, in town, they are looking for a woman that matches Bailey’s description, and surprisingly, Bailey is her name,” Liam announced.
Bailey grabbed a throw and pulled it over her legs as she shoved them into her chest. She stared at Liam as he spoke, but still didn’t push for the information he had.
“Who’s looking?” I asked reluctantly.
“That I’m not sure. Local police chief had her name, description, and that was all. They said her car was found below the mountain, right where I parked my truck,” he explained.
A strange sense of relief fell over me. Maybe there wasn’t anyone looking for her; it was just the empty car that set forth the search.
“Bailey Martin, 31, petite build, long red hair, that’s you,” Liam grinned towards Bailey.
Her face fell pale at the news he delivered.
“Does Martin sound familiar?” I questioned.
She shook her head slowly as she played scratched at her hand.
“I don’t think I’m good enough to make it down the mountain yet,” Bailey announced, lifting her eyes to Liam.
He paused, staring at her with seriousness. I knew he was trying to analyze her, to get inside of her head.
I was elated that she wasn’t ready to leave, but I wondered why she wasn’t eager to get back home to whoever was searching for her.
Chapter Sixteen
Bailey
Why the fuck was this man here? He was ruining everything, not only the love making he interrupted at his arrival, but everything.
I watched Xander as he struggled to be friendly and hospitable to the man he called a brother, but it was obvious he was a little irritated too. I wondered if it were for the same reasons I had. Was he dreading me leaving as much as I was?
“Are the roads cleared then?” Xander asked.
My heart raced as I waited for the answer. I bit my bottom lip into my mouth and calmed my breathing with slow, deep breaths until Liam finished chewing his piece of squirrel.
“Some of the roads in town are okay, but closer to the mountain, they are still pretty bad,” he informed.
Relief. Sweet relief.
“I had a hellish time getting my truck through the last two miles of road to the mountainside. I left my truck in the parking lot next to Bailey’s car, which is covered in ice by the way,” he chuckled.
“It’s a long hike from that parking lot to here,” Xander blurted.
“Yeah, and I wasn’t even sure where the fuck I was going,” Liam chuckled.
Liam’s eyes moved to mine, making me uncomfortable with his glare. His hands wrapped together as he wringed them like an old washcloth.
“You don’t have any idea who’d be looking for ya?” he asked me.
I shook my head. I really didn’t.
“I still don’t have a memory,” I explained.
“Nothing? By now you should be having some memories flooding back,” Liam exulted.
“Just the lyrics to a song, and the ability to fry chicken, well, squirrel,” I smiled softly at the man.
He was just like Xander described him, short, stocky, and looked like a body builder. You could barely see his neck from the muscles rippling up from his shoulders, but he still appeared to be very soft and gentle.
I watched as he leaned back on the couch, obviously ready to make himself at home. My blood boiled at the thought of him staying, but I knew that trip up the mountainside had to be harsh, and sending him away would be more than rude; it would be dangerous.
“Looks like there’s one more storm this evening, nothing major though, and then it’s all clear,” Liam announced.
“We should be able to get you off this mountain soon,” he winked in my direction.
That wasn’t what I wanted. That wasn’t what I wanted at all.
I smiled as politely as I possibly could, but I wanted to leap across the room and strangle the man who brought nothing but bad news and interruption from the time I had with Xander. Now, he would most likely be here until I did leave, dragging me down the mountain himself if he had to. How was I going to have any time with Xander? There would be no more intimate talks, no more snuggling in the bed all day, and no more love making.
I hate Liam.
“Until everything is clear, I don’t see the point in risking getting hurt,” I interjected into Liam’s plan of rescue.
“What was the mountainside like?” Xander asked, his eyes piercing into mine with anxiousness.
“It was still rough, very slick. The wind blowing snow from the treetops was making it feel like a blizzard was surrounding me, so I got lost for a while,” Liam explained.
“You’re lucky you made it up here,” Xander sighed.
“Yeah. I figure you know the way like the back of your hand, so getting down should be a cinch,” Liam added.
“But I have to get back up,” Xander pointed out.
“What, you sayin’ you’ll have problems?” Liam chuckled.
It was obvious Liam knew his friend was more than capable of handling this weather and this mountain. Xander had told me he could get me down, even during the worst of the storm, so I knew he was stalling. I was more than a little grateful that he wasn’t eagerly packing me up to get rid of me.
“Maybe. Got attacked by a coyote the other night, so my arm’s not as strong as it was,” he patted his shoulder as he spoke to his friend.
“Well, we can just hold up here until you’re both ready,” Liam smirked, glaring at each of us before leaning back on the couch cushion.
Ugh, he’s staying.
I didn’t want to appear to be ungrateful that Liam had come all this way to offer up news, and possible rescue me, so I offered him more coffee and then disappeared into the bathroom to splash some cold water on my face.
Martin wasn’t ringing any bells as I tried to connect to the last name. My mind was blank with stress over Liam’s arrival, making it impossible to think straight. Maybe after I calmed down, it would be more familiar.
I ran the water, letting my hands slip under the stream just for a second, and then splashed my face. I grabbed the towel on the sink, dried my face, and then stared into the mirror. Who was looking for me, for Bailey Martin?
Liam’s assessment of my lack of memory had me rattled as well. I had remembered my mother, and I believe my father’s voice, but that wasn’t hardly enough to make sense of my life, whatever life it was before I got here.
I’d kept the secret of my brief memories from Xander, so I surely didn’t feel the need to share them with Liam. When I knew more, I would divulge.
Liam was leaning into Xander as I walked out of the bathroom. He appeared to have been whispering something to him and quickly pulled away when I appeared. A warning, I was certain of that, telling Xander that he shouldn’t be getting too close to me, to this strange woman with no memory.
I picked up the empty skillet from the table, smiling at Liam warmly as I did, and then took it to the sink.
Xander’s eyes followed me. I could feel them on my back. I wished I could read his mind, to know what he was thinking, feeling.
I wiped the skillet out with a damp towel, and then seasoned it with oil before hanging it back up where it belonged. Heat pushed into my back, and then Xander’s strong hands rested on my hips.
“Are you okay?” he whispered in my ear.
“Yes. Are you?” I retorted.
“I am,” he said softly, and then quickly moved from his position behind me.
I turned, watching Xander grab the bottle of whiskey from under the sink. Great, now they were going to have a drink, hang out like old pals, and where did that leave me?
“Would you like a drink?” Xander asked, holding up the bottle with a grin.
“Sure,” I agreed, realizing that it would be a long night if I kept myself excluded.
He smiled sweetly and grabbed three glasses from the counter.
I followed him to the couch, taking the seat beside him instead of the one alone in the chair. Liam noticed, his eyes lingering on mine as I scooted in close to Xander and rested my hand on his leg.
“Oh yes, you know how to treat a guest,” Liam chanted, grabbing his glass and holding it out for Xander.
I waited until he’d poured theirs, and then lifted mine for him to fill. Xander’s eyes looked apologetic as they skimmed mine quickly, but I couldn’t tell for sure. From what I could tell, he seemed very uncomfortable with my hand on his leg. His muscles were tensing and flexing, and he shifted in his seat several times before I finally moved it.
The guys toasted, including me just for good manners, and then started roaring about their times as SEALS.
“You wouldn’t believe how wild and crazy this guy was,” Liam said, his eyes directed on me.
“I probably would,” I chuckled, sipping on the whiskey Xander poured for me.
“One night, we all had a three day pass, and this guy decides to commandeer a tank,” Liam laughed hard from the belly as he paused.
“And wrecked it into the fence, fled the scene, and then was called on scene to investigate?” I finished his story.
Liam’s eyes widened.
“Wow, you’ve really opened up to this one,” Liam gasped.
He had no idea. We’d talked so much, that I felt as though I’d known Xander forever. I, literally, knew more about him than I did myself.
They continued to tell stories, some I’d heard, some I hadn’t. It was nice watching Xander smile and laugh and witness the closeness he had with his brothers. I knew that he wasn’t one to develop relationships with anyone other than his brothers, so I felt honored that he’d become so close to me. I only wished it could continue and that I didn’t have to leave.
“I’m getting tired,” I interjected into their endless reminiscing.
Xander looked as if he were struggling with what to do or say. He stood from the couch, extended his hand to mine, and smiled. I wanted to lean in to kiss him, to have him lean in to kiss me, but he just stood there. We both just stood there.
“Do you need anything?” he asked sweetly.
I shook my head. I needed him.
“We won’t keep you up, will we?” Liam asked.
“No. I’m just going to lay down for a little bit. I probably won’t sleep anyway,” I responded.
It was still early, but I couldn’t sit there so close to Xander without touching him any longer.
Xander smiled, released my hand, and let me head over to the bed without his assistance. I’d hoped he would at least come over and tuck me in with a kiss away from Liam’s sight, but it was obvious he was being cautious around his friend.
I curled up in the bed, snuggled in the blankets that still carried Xander’s scent, and closed my eyes.
I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep, but it felt good to rest. I guess I’d need all the rest I could get. If Liam had his way, I’d be making that long trip down the mountain side real soon.
Chapter Seventeen
Xander
Bailey was acting strange. I was aware that I was being distant, but I wasn’t ready to deal with Liam’s judgement of the situation. I knew he’d tell me exactly what I was already feeling: it was wrong, I was taking advantage of her, and that I knew better. I did know better, but I couldn’t explain it. She done something to me, something different, something I truly loved.
“So, she’s all healed?” Liam asked, leaning in to keep his voice low.
Bailey had been in bed for a couple hours, maybe more. Hell, we’d finished the rest of that bottle of whiskey over an hour ago. I hadn’t seen her move in a while, and I assumed she was sleeping, but I still didn’t want to chance talking about her too loudly.
“Almost,” I responded, not wanting to admit I thought she could make it down the mountain.
“So, nothing was broken then?” Liam pushed.
I shook my head. “Just sprained and bruised pretty badly.”
“Can we talk?” Liam asked, his tone turning serious.
Liam was always the philosopher in the group, the one who analyzed everything to death. I knew he’d already analyzed this situation, and he had plenty to say. I wasn’t looking forward to hearing it, but I certainly didn’t want Bailey to hear it.
“I need to get some more fire wood. You wanna come out and help me split some logs?” I suggested.
Liam agreed, standing from the couch and grabbing his coat and gloves. When I stood, I was a little tipsy, not accustomed to drinking that much anymore.
“Let me get dressed,” I excused myself, moving over towards the bed.
I picked up my jeans, a flannel, and my gloves that were on the ground, careful not to wake Bailey.
The blanket was pulled up, just to her shoulders. That sweet part of her neck was peeking out, and it took everything I had to refrain from pressing my lips against it. Liam was standing by the door, already wrapped up and ready for the cold, so I quickly slipped into the bathroom, changed clothes, and followed him outside.
I had enough wood split to last for a week, but I grabbed two more logs and stood them on the stump.
“So things have been going okay?” Liam asked.
I picked up the axe and swung down hard on the log, splitting it halfway through with the single hit.
“Things have been great,” I replied, not making eye contact with my friend.
“You two seem pretty cozy,” he added with a chuckle.
I looked up, resting the axe by my side and sighed. I knew where this was going, and even though I wasn’t ready for his warnings or advice, there was no stopping it. I knew that.
“It’s been nice having company,” I admitted.
“Has it?” he questioned.
“Yeah,” I smiled.
“That’s just so unlike you. I mean, hell, you came out here in the middle of nowhere to be alone,” he pointed out.
“True,” I sighed.
“So, this girl, she’s got a hold on you?” he hesitated.
I took another swing with the axe, splitting the log all the way through. I wasn’t sure how to answer his question, or if I even wanted to answer it. I leaned down, picked up the split pieces, and tossed them on the pile.
“Xander, have you two been sleeping together?” Liam asked.
I stood up, stared at my friend, and felt the blood rushing from my face. He knew me, almost too well, and lying to him was useless.
“We have,” I admitted.
Liam’s head dropped, and a deep sigh rolled from his mouth. When he looked back up at me, his eyes were filled with concern.
“She doesn’t even know who she is,” he pointed out.
“I’m aware of that. You can’t tell me anything I don’t already know. It’s wrong, it’s stupid, yeah, I’ve already beat myself up. But there is something about her, something I can’t explain,” I rattled.
“What happens when she leaves, when she remembers?” Liam asked the question that had already gnawed a hole in my soul.
I shrugged, picking up another log and placing it on the stump. As I started to lift the axe, Liam gripped my arm, pulling it down to my side.
“Xander, I’m serious,” he warned.
“I get it. She’s going to remember, and she’s going to leave. I’ve already came to terms with that,” I lied.
“What about her? Will she be able to come to terms with it?” he asked.
I stared into Liam’s eyes, trying to find the response he was looking for, but came up empty. I hadn’t thought about how it would affect Bailey. I just assumed she’d be the one to take off, not look back, and be fine. I was the one that would be left alone, left to shake off the feelings I’d developed for her.
“I mean, don’t you think it’s weird that she doesn’t even want to go home?” Liam questioned.
“Well, she doesn’t know what she’s g
oing home to,” I defended.
Liam was silent for a moment, shifting his feet in the deep snow. I watched as he lifted his eyes to mine, dark and distant. There was something he wanted to say; that was obvious by his body language.
“Maybe she does know what she’s going home to, and that’s why she’s avoiding it,” Liam uttered.
“What do you mean?” I queried.
“Well, she hasn’t made any attempt to get help, didn’t seem even slightly interested in the information I had, or didn’t have, and she said she hasn’t remembered anything. I mean, c’mon, she would have remembered something. She didn’t hit her head that fucking hard,” he accused.
“She wouldn’t lie to me about that,” I snapped.
“Really, because you know her so well?” Liam snarled.
He was right. I didn’t know her that well. But he wasn’t right about her lying. Bailey was sweet, innocent, and different from any woman I’d ever met. What we shared was real, wasn’t it?
“Why else would she not be interested in going home, or at least finding out where home is?” Liam pushed.
“We’ve become pretty close, so maybe she’s just afraid of leaving me,” I suggested.
“So she’s staying here for sex?” Liam chuckled sarcastically.
“It’s more than sex,” I grunted.
Liam’s stopped half-snort, looking up at me with a surprised expression.
“More? What do you mean?” he asked.
I didn’t answer. I lifted my axe and dropped it down hard on the thick log, splitting it in two with one hit. I picked up the pieces, tossed them towards the pile, and then felt Liam’s hand grip my arm tightly, pulling me back towards him.
“You have real feelings for this woman?” he questioned.
As I struggled to find the words to respond, I realized that yes, I did have real feelings for Bailey. I hated the thought of her leaving me, and a part of me wished she could stay forever. It was ridiculous, I knew that. I mean, what the fuck? She didn’t know who the hell she was, so how would she have any idea of what she wanted? Fuck, this is why I should’ve followed my gut, and never let things get to this point in the first place.