by Nashoda Rose
Something that demanded.
Something that controlled.
Owned.
That was what it was—owning.
The signals indicated that Killian got whatever he desired. And tonight, it was me.
I leaned over the counter as the thought slammed into me and my face heated and sex clenched.
God, what was I thinking? But from my body’s reaction, I knew exactly what I was thinking.
Sex with Killian. Rough, demanding sex that owned a woman’s body. Protected. Coveted.
I turned on the taps, cupped my hands under the steady stream and brought the cool water to my face.
Was I strong enough to have sex with him and keep my heart? My heart had already been broken once. I’d trusted David, and he’d taken advantage of that trust. He’d made promises and broke them. Maybe I was blinded by those promises of a family and a home, but it had still hurt like hell.
Except this was about sex. Sex with Killian, not a relationship. He wasn’t making promises.
But there’d be no question experiencing Killian would leave bits of myself behind just like it had with my first kiss.
And then there was the issue of him paying me to date him. If I slept with him, what would that make me?
“Are you dating Kite?”
I darted upright at the woman’s voice, having not heard the door open.
Water dripped down my cheeks, and I quickly reached for the paper towels and dried my face before the water stained my dress.
I looked at her in the reflection of the mirror. She was about twenty or so, with long brown hair and light amber streaks. It reached past her shoulders, and there were some layers at the front that framed her soft, pretty face. Well, it would be soft if it weren’t for the harsh eyeliner and bright blue eye shadow.
“Uh, yes.”
“I saw you go into the washroom and well, I didn’t want to come to your table because I heard he likes his privacy, but I really, really like him.” She inhaled then trudged on. “I like his playing. On the drums, I mean. I’ve seen Tear Asunder in concert four times, and Kite is so calm and easygoing when he plays. He’s mesmerizing.” Another deep inhale. “I love Ream, too. He’s intense and God, he’s so sweet and protective with Kat. Well, all the guys are from what I’ve read and seen. Emily is a sweetheart and rescues horses, and Sculpt isn’t into them, but I’ve seen pictures of him at her horse whispering clinics supporting her. Oh, and Haven is like an angel and helps kids on the street.” Another breath. “They are the coolest band around. Sometimes they do surprise gigs at Avalanche where they first started playing. It’s so cool of them.”
When she paused to take another breath, I quickly interrupted, “Would you like his autograph?”
“Oh, my God, would I? Yes. Yes. I was going to ask if you could maybe ask him.”
I smiled. “I’ll ask. But I’m sure he’ll be fine with it.” It was weird because to me, Kite was just Killian. But these girls saw him as a god. An idol.
I laughed to myself as I led the girl back to our table because I’d compared him to Zeus that day on the school steps.
Killian stood beside the table talking to François when I approached with the girl trailing behind.
“Thank you, François,” I said. He took my hand and kissed the back of it. “The meal was amazing.” Everything had been perfect, including Killian.
“Mademoiselle, it was our pleasure, and when we are not so busy, you must meet my other half.”
“I’d like that,” I replied, but that was unlikely to happen since our arrangement was over in a month.
He nodded to Killian and then weaved through the tables.
“Killia—” I stopped myself, remembering the fans called him Kite. “Kite, this is…”
“Jenny,” the girl offered, stepping from behind me.
“Jenny,” I continued. “Do you think you could give her your autograph?” I tried not to laugh because it was odd seeing him as a celebrity.
Of course, Killian saw me biting my lip to stop myself from laughing and rolled his eyes.
Then he shifted his attention to the girl. “Of course,” he replied.
The girl took over from there and repeated pretty much what she’d told me in the washroom, except this time at warp speed.
Killian politely listened.
I tilted my chin down to hide my smile.
If only these girls knew what Killian was like before. They wouldn’t even consider walking up to him and asking for his autograph.
The girl finally bounced away with Killian’s name scrolled across a cocktail napkin. I thought of that day I found the orchid on my trailer steps.
The note where he’d signed his name. It read Killian though, not Kite. I still had it tucked away in a book that sat beside the orchid.
“Ready?” he asked.
“Yes. Thank you for dinner.” His gaze flicked to my mouth, and his eyes smoldered. “I was thinking maybe… well, you have fans here and they’re watching so maybe I should kiss you? For the publicity, I mean.”
He didn’t grin. Didn’t respond. Didn’t do anything for a moment and I wasn’t sure if I said something wrong until his hand slid into mine and our fingers interlocked. He briefly squeezed.
I thought he might kiss me when he moved in closer, but instead, his mouth hovered close to my ear as he whispered in the sexiest voice ever, “No, orchid. I’m not sharing the first time you give in and kiss me with anyone.”
I hated dropping her off at this fuckin’ place. It made me uneasy that there was no security in the building, not even cameras. Then there was the smell of marijuana in the stairwell. A stairwell she had to take because the fuckin’ elevator didn’t work. My only consolation was as of three days ago, I had Roman—part of Luke’s security team—keeping an eye on the place in the evenings.
Bottom line was I had to get her out of here. I just didn’t know how to do that yet without pissing her off. Savvy may be kindhearted and sweet and thought everyone had good bits, but insisting she move could shatter anything I’d built so far.
Yet leaving her here didn’t sit well. My instinct was to protect. To make sure those I cared for weren’t threatened in any way. Fuck, Logan and I had put all the money we had into buying a farm for Emily so she’d feel safe after what happened to her.
“I don’t like you living here.”
She half laughed as she turned the key in the lock. “Well, this is where I live.”
“Savvy, it’s a dump.” And she deserved better than this.
She smiled, leaning back against the door, her hand behind her on the doorknob. “So what, are you going to burn it down so I have to move?”
I shrugged. “If I have to.”
She snorted, and it was so damn cute it took everything I had not to kiss her.
“It’s unsafe.”
“I’ve been here for months, and there hasn’t been one incident.”
“It only takes one,” I replied.
“Trevor’s across the hall.”
“The hacker,” I said. “Who makes fake concert passes and whatever else. And therefore has God knows who knocking at his door.” Trevor wasn’t the problem. I had Luke look into him. The guy was a genius and had graduated with two degrees. What I didn’t like was who came to his door for his illegal hacking services.
“Are you embarrassed to date a girl who lives here?”
I jolted, scowling. “Fuck, Savvy. No. You know I don’t give a shit what people say. I’ve never been like that.”
“But you’re dating me for your reputation. Isn’t that a little contradictory.”
I put my hand on her hip and nearly groaned out loud when I felt her shiver in response. “I think you know this has nothing to do with my reputation.”
She tensed. Then within a breath, she relaxed again. “Thank you for tonight.”
She stood on her tiptoes, and before I knew what she was doing, she kissed me. It was brief, but the touch of velvet plush lips
against mine was irresistible. And when she pulled back, our lips clung for a second as if not wanting to let go.
Fuck. “Savvy,” I murmured, fingers tightening on her hip and dragging her into me.
My cock jerked, and it took all my control to not scoop her up into my arms, kick open her door and carry her to bed. But this was about her, not me.
And this was far more than fucking her one night. This was letting her in and having all of her. If I fucked her while I was paying her to date me… she’d regret it. I couldn’t have that.
The creak of the door handle turned and then her door was opening, and she disappeared inside, quietly shutting the door behind her.
I stood in the hallway for a minute staring at the door and listening to her heels click on the hardwood floors inside.
“Don’t hurt her.”
I stiffened, slowly turning to see Trevor leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. “I don’t plan on it.”
“Yeah, well, you’re a rock star with a shit track record. Actually, no track record because you don’t date. Except suddenly you’re dating Savvy and giving her a new car and telling her she can’t live here.”
“You heard.”
Trevor knocked on the wall. “Like you said, a dump. Thin walls.”
“Babe, are you coming back to bed?” a female voice called from inside his place.
Trevor ignored her. “I like you because I think you care about her. And you rock on the drums.” Trevor pushed off the doorframe. “But this bogus dating thing is bad news.”
“She told you?” Fuck, the fewer people who knew about our arrangement, the better. I didn’t want Savvy to get hurt by it because the media might not be so kind if they found out, even if the truth was I wasn’t fake dating at all.
He shook his head. “No. She didn’t have to. Savvy gets a job at Compass, new car, cell phone, and is going on dates with you. She’d never take that shit from you if there wasn’t something else going on.”
“She didn’t willingly take it. And I’d never hurt her.”
He shrugged. “Just sayin’. I saw the way she looked at you the other night. She was drunk maybe, but the truth is often revealed when you’re drunk. There was nothing bogus about that.” He turned, went inside his place and closed the door.
The only way I got her to take the car, money and the cell phone was because of the arrangement we had.
I understood it. She’d worked for everything she’d ever wanted and had grown up with a mother who hadn’t given a shit about her. To only then be thrown into the foster care system. But she continued to dance. She took that with her and I wanted her to have that.
But not at a nightclub.
As I walked into my warehouse a half hour later, I tried to picture Savvy here, in this empty, desolate space with no memories, no attachments, nothing except brick walls and the necessities.
She’d want memories. Pictures on the walls and knickknacks on the shelves. The question was if I could give it to her or was I delusional in thinking this could work.
Tonight had tested my control, watching her eat dessert. The way the cream clung to her lips. How she held it in her mouth, her cheeks flushed.
My dick was so fuckin’ hard. It took everything I had not to follow her into the restrooms at the restaurant and fuck her up against the wall. But the first time wouldn’t be a quick fuck against a wall. The thought of slipping my cock into her… I didn’t know how long I’d last, but I wanted to savor that moment, a moment I’d never experienced before. A moment that would change everything.
I unbuttoned my dress shirt on the way to the bathroom, peeled it off and tossed it on the bed. I finished stripping in the bathroom, my cock jutting out.
I turned on the shower, the rainfall teeming down from the sprayer on the ceiling.
Stepping into the tiled oasis, I stood under the waterfall, tilting my head back, running my hand through my hair then down my chest to my abdomen, then to my cock.
It jerked the second I touched it. Christ.
It wouldn’t take long tonight. I’d been hard for the last five fuckin’ hours.
Closing my eyes, the heated water drizzled over my skin and my hand tightened around my cock as I pictured Savvy.
Her hips swaying seductively in that dress as she walked. A sway she had no idea she had, so completely unaware of her beauty.
I grunted and gripped harder, slowly moving my hand up and down.
Her on her knees in front of me. Still wearing that dress as the water soaked into the material. Her mouth inches from my cock, her hand around it and those doe eyes asking me.
Asking me if she could suck me.
I groaned, my head back, hand moving faster. Tightness clenching.
No. Not yet. Not fuckin’ yet.
I slowed. I wanted her mouth first.
Her mouth full of me like the crème brûlée.
She opened her mouth and took all of it. All of me.
I’d purposely given her more than her mouth could comfortably take, wanting to see her reaction.
And I nearly came in my pants like a fuckin’ teenager when she did it.
God, she was fuckin’ perfect.
I groaned louder as I jerked my cock harder.
Faster.
I leaned against the wall, legs braced, picturing Savvy between my legs sucking me off. My fingers fisted in her red wet curls as I pushed deeper. And deeper. A little choking sound and then she sucked harder.
Her slight gasp.
“Fuuuuckkkk.” I groaned as my balls tightened then jolts shot through me again and again as I came.
My cock still in my hand, water drizzling down my wet skin, heart thumping, I bowed my head. “Jesus.”
Three more weeks and then this bullshit with the dating would end, and I’d be able to have her.
And when that happened, Savvy Grady was going to place her good bits in my hand, and when she did, I’d close my fist and never let them go.
The only way I could describe dating Killian Kane was frustrating. I’d never wanted a man as much as I did him, and he didn’t make it easy on me. In the last week, we appeared in public places, restaurants, the club, the boardwalk, and the Science Center because there was an exhibit on Wild Weather he wanted to see.
But what really did me in was showing up at my door looking smokin’ hot with coffee and croissants for the last five mornings. Sometimes he didn’t stay as he had to go to Logan’s to work on the album, but other times he did, and we’d sat at my kitchen table and talked while eating the delicious pastries and the best coffee I’d ever had.
One morning Trevor even joined us. It said a lot about Killian as, despite his overprotectiveness and how he reacted to me dancing at the club, he was okay with Trevor being around.
We also went and visited Lucifer again where I broached the subject of his dad. All he told me was he and Emily were attempting to get the horses away from him, but the law wasn’t on their side. Killian was pissed about it, too. I had the feeling he’d drive over there and steal the horses if he could.
I liked him. I mean, I had before, but I really did now.
I knew he wanted more, but there was so much of Killian he kept hidden, and that scared me. I’d trusted David and maybe that was partially my fault, but I wasn’t making the same mistake. I didn’t even know where Killian lived.
It was nine on Sunday morning and I was getting dressed when there was a knock on the door. I caught myself smiling because I knew it was Killian with coffee. He’d told me last night that he’d pick me up at ten to go for brunch. It was early, but I’d discovered Killian was usually early and never late.
But when I opened the door, it wasn’t him.
It was David.
I believed in the good in people. I gave them the benefit of the doubt. I forgave them. But David hurt me. No, it was more than that. He destroyed my willingness to trust.
He stuck out his foot when I tried to slam the door. “Savannah, baby, please. Giv
e me five minutes.” He hated my nickname Savvy, said it sounded childish, so he always called me Savannah. I’d never minded until now. I loved how Killian pronounced Savvy with the “a” elongated to “ah.”
“No,” I retorted and tried to shut the door again, but he pushed inside, and I was forced to back up.
He clicked it closed behind him.
“Get out, David.”
David wasn’t bulky big, but he was tall, agile, and strong. After all, he did lift dancers above his head. He was good-looking, kind of a pretty boy look with short dark blond hair, a square jaw, and baby blue eyes. He also had a panty-melting grin and was armed with a wink that had all the girls in dance class swooning. And probably why one of them ended up in his bed.
“I want you to come back,” he said as he walked toward me. I backed up until my calves hit the coffee table. “I made a huge mistake. It was stupid. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”
“You should’ve thought of that before you shoved your dick into another girl’s pussy.” I rarely used language like that, but I was mad that he was here, bringing up all the hurt and emotions that came with him. God, I can’t believe I fell for him. “You purposely ruined my reputation, David. You sent out an e-mail!”
He bowed his head and ran his hands back and forth over the top. “I know. I know. I was desperate and mad and wanted you back.”
“So, you spread rumors that I was difficult to work with and slept with one of my students when it was you who had. I couldn’t get a job. No one would hire me. You hurt me, David. What makes you think I’d ever come back to you?”
He was inches away from me now, and my stomach curdled. Slimy. That was what he was. I’d been blinded by him and knew now it was because he’d fit into my dream. What I’d been working for since I was a kid. I loved working at the dance studio. He’d told me he wanted a family. A family, damn it. I’d never had a family. God, he’d said he wanted kids.
“I fucked up.” He reached for my hand and linked our fingers together. I jerked back and tried to brush past him, but he hooked my waist from behind and pulled me into him. “I love you, Savannah. Please, give me a second chance. You believe everyone deserves one, so why not me?”