She pocketed her phone and grabbed her bagel and cream cheese. Bethenny was already sitting at a table eating her lunch and Addison moved to join her. Just as she took her seat she felt her phone vibrate and a shot of adrenaline coursed through her. Pull yourself together woman, he sent a text, not a dozen roses. Maybe it’s not even him.
Just as she reached to check, Bethenny spoke.
“What do you think of Henry, Addison?” Bethenny asked before Addison could pull her phone out of her coat pocket.
“Umm, as a future doctor? He’ll be great. Not sure about his bedside manner, but whatever,” she answered before taking a bite of her bagel and casually pulling her phone out onto her lap.
“No I mean as a person. Do you think he’s cute?”
Addison nearly choked on her bite of bagel and was once again distracted from reading Holden’s text.
“What? Where is this coming from?” Addison asked, noticing how Bethenny wouldn’t pull her gaze away from her meal.
“I just think he’s so smart, and he actually helped me with the case study you know. I don’t think we ended up with the right diagnosis... but while everyone else was avoiding each other like the plaque, he approached me to get coffee and to go over it together.”
“Wow... that’s... so not Henry.” Addison laughed taking another bite of bagel. “But it seems oddly sweet. He is cute if you take away the intense overachiever attitude...or maybe you like that?” Addison winked and Bethenny rolled her eyes, laughing.
Addison finally took a moment to steal a glance at her phone before Bethenny continued divulging her feelings for Henry.
How does he know? Addison’s head snapped up and she quickly scanned for Holden. Is he here? She spotted him a second later through the lounge windows. He was standing just beyond the room, casually talking with a few other residents. Holy crap, he’s flirting with me. He wants to eat lunch with me.
“Earth to Addison,” Bethenny spoke, waving her hand in front of Addison’s face. Addison laughed awkwardly, turning back to her conversation.
“Sorry, I spaced for a second. I’m really glad Henry invited you to dinner later though. That’ll be such a good change from studying every night,” Addison spoke, trying to keep her excitement about Holden’s text from bubbling over too obviously. She was telling me about dinner with Henry, right?
“I know, I wonder where he’ll take me.” Bethenny stood to go heat up her soup in the microwave giving Addison a few seconds of free reign to stare at Holden. He was angled slightly toward her laughing at something said within the group. She wished she was a part of whatever was making him laugh. She wanted to be the girl to make him smile like that.
Holden looked toward her then, his smile somehow becoming even more intoxicating as his eyes locked with hers. The weight of their stare held so much potential. The residents continued to talk around him and Bethenny made her way back to the table, but Addison and Holden didn’t look away. His expression was so captivating and full of things she knew they needed to say. She smiled coyly, letting her guard down in front of him for the first time since returning to Austin. Alright, I came back for you a LITTLE bit.
“You’ve got some major explaining to do,” Bethenny said as the two girls walked to the conference room.
“Oh come on, I was just staring off into space, not at our crazy-intimidating head resident,” Addison promised, trying to cover her bases. She knew her words were obviously lies but she wasn’t prepared to be honest with herself, let alone Bethenny, about what was truly going on. She realized that although they were friends in the past, he was now her supervisor and any relationship between them would most likely be breaking dozens of rules. As if I didn’t have enough baggage pushing him away already...
“Yeah, but you have to be honest, that man makes all of the guys in this hospital look like Neanderthals.”
Addison laughed as she rolled her eyes, “He may look like a freaking Greek god, but that’s all. I wasn’t staring at him. I was simply thinking of how breathtakingly beautiful the 1980’s wallpaper in that nurse’s lounge is.”
Bethenny cracked up as the two girls finally entered the conference room and took their usual seats.
“I’ll accept that ridiculous answer for now, Ms. he-and-I-used-to-be-friends.”
Chapter 19
“Now that everything else is covered, I’d like to announce Dr. Warwick’s choice for tomorrow’s surgery spot,” Holden declared, his words causing a hushed silence to fall over the room.
“While a few of you identified the correct disorder as spondylolysis, only one of you was able to provide the correct treatment plan.” All of the students sat motionless, waiting on pins and needles. Just tell Henry he got the spot already…“Ms. Caldwell,” Holden began as she snapped her gaze up to him.
“Your choice of rehab, rather than surgery, was spot on,” Holden explained, offering her a professional smile. “While many spinal injuries require surgical procedures, it’s important to identify when less extreme measures can, and should, be taken.” He nodded toward her and she tried to swallow only to find her mouth dry. Wow, I’m doing a surgery. With him. Tomorrow.
She let out a surprised huff.
“Ms. Caldwell, please stay behind to speak with me for a minute. Everyone else is dismissed.”
What? I have to talk to him alone? We haven’t been alone since that night a year ago.
Every eye had turned to Addison during Holden’s announcement; her fellow students tried and failed to hide narrowed glances aimed at her for being chosen over them. Bethenny shot Addison a surprised look and a warm smile before following the other students out of the conference room. “You’re so lucky” she mouthed before stepping out and Addison couldn’t decide if she was talking about getting to assist in surgery or getting to be alone with Holden. Addison’s gaze remained fixed on the spot by the door Bethenny had just occupied as she tried to absorb all that had happened in the last few minutes. I was chosen for the surgery. Holden wants to talk to me alone.
“Do you need to interrogate me about the empty coffee pots in the nurse’s lounge? I swear I’m not the culprit,” she quipped, finding herself suddenly nervous at how quickly the atmosphere around her had changed. We’re alone… and he looks like the most divine creature on the planet…and I can’t even make myself look at him.
Holden looked down at his feet and let out a soft laugh.
He shook his head and she could tell he was amused. “No Addison, any student chosen to assist in tomorrow’s surgery would have been asked to stay.” Oh. “There’s a few waivers that you need to read over and sign, as well as some procedure codes to go over,” he said, pulling out the chair next her and sitting down.
She nodded as she watched him take a seat. So, this has nothing to do with us. She watched his hands at work as he pulled various papers from his clipboard and slid them toward her. Her skin was tingling from their proximity.
“I’m proud of you, Addy,” he spoke softly. His comfortable declaration finally eased some of the butterflies out of her stomach but she still couldn’t gauge how to read the situation. He had to go over these forms with whoever was chosen, but then he flipped it around with his endearing words. It was like one minute she was facing plain old Holden and the other she was facing the new, stern Dr. Taylor.
“Yeah… thanks,” she stammered. “I can’t believe I was right. I mean, I definitely thought Henry would end up getting picked...” she admitted, still shocked.
There was an awkward lull in conversation as they both realized the significance of the moment. How can we have small talk when there are so many things I need to say just hanging in the air? She knew they didn’t have the time or privacy to talk about every detail, but she wanted to take the opportunity to ask him something that had haunted her since Monday.
“Are you going to tell me how you knew I was homecoming queen?” she asked, her head tilted to the side as she turned to face him.
Addison flashed a tiny
amused smile as Holden looked down at the table, obviously surprised by her question.
“This isn’t really the time Addison...” Holden answered, looking up through the glass paneled walls to the nurses and doctors bustling around the ward.
“No one can hear us in here, Dr. Taylor, and you owe me an explanation,” she said stubbornly, teasing him.
He ran his hands through his hair as if giving himself time to piece together what he was about to tell her.
“It’s not a big deal Addison. I drove to your house in Houston. Your mom showed me the picture. That’s it,” he offered sitting back in his chair.
Wow. What?
“You did what? When?” she asked, her treacherous tone giving away how taken aback she was. His response had been the last thing she was expecting him to say and he’d said it so casually, as if it wouldn’t have meant the world to her. What’s going on? Holden kept his gaze on the window panels as he began to explain.
“I went the week after you left for PA school. You didn’t tell me the day your program started so when I got there, your mom told me you had already left, and I knew I was too late.”
Too late?
“You know, I had such a hard time finding your address. Thankfully Alicia was willing to give me the information in exchange for my hospital badge and driver’s license number.” He laughed.
“I drove there even though you’d blown off my calls and texts, I couldn’t let things end the way they had.”
He drove to Houston? He came after me?
“But my mom never told me,” Addison argued, instantly recalling all of the opportunities her mom could have mentioned it as they sat on the phone day in and day out since she’d been away.
“I asked her not to. When I drove to your house and found you gone, I knew it was over. I told myself that fate would have intervened if I was meant to see you again. I felt so dumb driving all the way down there after you’d basically blown me off completely... Our timing was just off. So I moved on.” No…
Addison registered his words, enduring the pieces of her heart beginning to rip away their once-healed scars. Of course you moved on, you dumb bastard. That brunette was on you before I even left for Houston. She sat staring at the documents in front of her with fuzzy focus. She couldn’t process all the new information he was unfolding before her and she knew she needed time to think.
The glass door to the conference room suddenly slid open and Dr. Warwick stepped in.
“Hey Dr. Taylor, we need to go see that post-op patient stat. She’s been waiting for a while,” the older man ordered, waiting for Holden to join him. Addison realized it was her cue to leave and she stood up, grabbing her papers and walking toward the door.
“I’ll see you in surgery tomorrow, Dr. Taylor,” she spoke professionally.
Holden stood from his seat, his fierce brown eyes holding hers in a final moment. “Make sure you read and sign every one of those papers before tomorrow,” he urged and she couldn’t pinpoint why his words shook her. Maybe he’s just really serious about procedural codes…
The rest of the day passed in a blur as Addison went through the motions expected of her. She completed rounds and ran through various tasks all the while playing through memories in her mind, wondering what she would’ve done differently if she'd known Holden had gone after her. There were so many questions she needed to ask him and didn’t know when they’d see each other again before surgery the next day. When she got a small break later in the day she stepped out of the hospital and called her mom.
She answered on the second ring. “Hey sweetie, aren’t you usually doing rotations right now?”
“Yeah, I stepped out for a second.” She took a breath before biting the bullet. “Mom, did Holden come to the house after I left for North Carolina?” Addison asked, bracing herself for whatever answer she was about to hear.
She heard a deep sigh through the phone before her mom answered. “Yes.” She paused. “He had a bouquet of magnolia blossoms in his hands when I opened the door; I’d never seen such beautiful flowers.” Addison found an old wooden bench near the entrance of the hospital and sat while she listened to her mom continue. “He was standing there, sweetheart, like a prince out of one of those silly films you grew up watching. When I explained that you had left for North Carolina the week before the expression on his face broke my heart. I don’t know what sort of spell you put on that boy... I invited him inside and made him a cup of coffee. I didn’t bring up the details of yall’s relationship... but he knew you told me all about it and I think he needed to confide in someone about it as well. I listened to him talk the whole afternoon, and when he begged me not to tell you about his visit on his way out, I knew I’d honor his request. It was so difficult when you’d call home upset about the way things had worked out, but I knew fate would sort you two out eventually.
I know you went back to Hyde Park hospital for him. You didn’t mention it in the car, but I remember details about your stories more than you think I do. I was giddy that whole drive home thinking of how it would end for you two… Addison, just know that whatever issues you have with that boy, he cared for you at least as much as you cared for him, if not more.”
Addison sat frozen on the bench, feeling the last year of her life crumbling beneath her. Minutes passed by as she continued to sit in silence with her mom on the other end of the line. She didn’t have anything to say but she knew she needed her mom to stay on the line. After a few minutes, when she thanked her mom for keeping her promise to Holden and was about to hang up, she suddenly remembered her original question to Holden earlier.
“Mom, did you tell Holden I was homecoming queen?”
Her mother laughed on the other end of the line. “Oh gosh, he saw that picture of you with your crown and sash on the mantel and I had to show you off; moms love bragging about their babies. Why?”
Addison shook her head, a small smile forming on her lips. “It’s nothing. I’ll call you tomorrow. Love you.”
Chapter 20
The young couple ventured quickly down the cobblestone street as quietly as possible. It was New Year’s eve, and they had left their friend’s gathering early, sneaking past their carriage and out onto the open streets of London. They knew it was against social rules and would result in a scolding for them both , but the couple hadn’t cared. They knew watchful eyes would be on them if they had stayed in the ballroom, and so the boy suggested they run off and spend midnight alone, just the two of them.
They stopped walking once the old keep was out of their line-of-sight. The girl ran off to the darkest side of the street, giggling as the boy playfully ran after her. She held her hand out for the boy to take it once he had caught up. The darkness surrounding them and the excitement of being alone made her feel bold and in love. He stroked her blonde hair and smiled softly. They were only twelve but had been friends their whole life. He knew that this would be his only chance to kiss her, as their houses were sure to keep a more watchful eye on the two of them after tonight.
He pulled a gold pocket watch out the fob of his dark blue velvet waistcoat. “It’s almost the new year.” he whispered, his words saturated in the hope of what might take place at midnight.
The young girl straightened her petticoat, nervous for each passing moment. They both stared down at his watch, holding their breath as the second hand dragged closer and closer to its zenith. As it reached twelve the boy nervously looked toward the young girl’s face and lifted her chin, watching her deep green eyes for any signs of warning.
She stepped closer and sealed her lips to his, feeling brave for kissing the boy she had come to love long ago.
One yoga session and a long shower later, Addison plopped down on her couch to go over the surgical forms Holden had given her that morning. She ran her fingers through her damp hair as she skimmed the paperwork. Most of them were concerning patient’s rights and privacy laws so she read through them carefully and signed each page. There was also a form d
escribing proper dress code and surgical etiquette so Addison made sure to commit the rules to memory before pushing the page aside as well. Underneath that form was a smaller piece of paper that looked different from the previous sheets. There was only a small paragraph of handwritten text on the worn piece of notebook paper and Addison immediately recognized Holden’s messy scrawl.
Addison sat on her couch going through the words over and over in her mind. It was obvious that since Holden had made such a point of instructing her to read every page he’d slipped the quote in on purpose. He’d given her this secret little message and was insinuating that she was the object of his desire, but just thinking of how blatantly forward the statement was made her blush. Didn’t he say he moved on earlier? She wanted so badly to call or text him, to reach out and find answers to all of her questions. Her mom’s description of him standing on her front porch with flowers had turned her hardened heart to mush. She wanted to tell Holden that he hadn’t made a mistake going to her house, she’d been a fool for leaving Austin without telling him how she felt and then she made it even worse by pushing him out of her life completely. He’d gone after her; he’d found her address and gone to Houston and she’d left without so much as a goodbye.
The collection of surgical forms sprawled across her table drew her attention back to the challenging task she’d be facing tomorrow. Focus, Addison. Although she could’ve spent hours, or even days, daydreaming about the quote he’d so purposefully given to her, she knew tomorrow was an important day and she wanted to be prepared. There’d be time to figure Holden out after she assisted in her first surgery. She reviewed specific surgical techniques for the rest of the night, wanting to impress, or at least keep up with, the doctors in the operating room the next day. However, when she laid her head against her pillow to try to sleep, it wasn’t the surgery that kept her so far from slumber, it was the excitement she felt knowing she’d see Holden again so soon, knowing he’d gone after her, knowing his desire had grown stronger for her.
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