Ignite (The Disciples Book 4)

by Cassandra Robbins

  “Antoinette.” Dolly’s voice is so obvious that I sit down, rolling my eyes. Fucking Eve.

  I sigh. “Eve told you.” It’s not a question, so her shocked gasp makes me smile.

  “Eve? Who’s Eve?”

  This time I do laugh. “Stop it. By the way, she promised me she wouldn’t.”

  “Oh, you stop it. She’s protecting you from yourself.” She starts to laugh. Dolly is the best. She doesn’t judge. I think it’s because she stabbed Edge, and let’s be honest—it’s hard to top that.

  “Look, I’m calling because I know you’re upset. But I’ve known Axel since we were kids, and I can one hundred percent tell you he’s going to surprise you. Don’t give up on him.”

  I puff out all the air I was holding and clear my throat. “Thank you. I needed that.”

  “I know you did. Sometimes we need to know we’re not alone.”

  Breathing deeply, I look up at the ceiling. “I’ve been alone all my life, until I met Axel that is.”

  “Well, you’re not alone anymore… Holy fuck. What happened to your nose?”

  “What?”

  “I have to go. Edge just got home.” Her voice sounds dry.

  “Okay, thanks, Doll—” I hear the door open and I nearly drop the phone. I’m going to puke. Strike that. I’m going to faint because I can’t breathe. I’ve been waiting for hours and now that he’s here, I want more time.

  He walks in like a caged beast. The heat coming from him is palpable and I stare in horror.

  “Holy God!”

  He walks past me, straight to the freezer, grabbing a handful of ice. Then he turns and leans on the counter, bringing it to his eye.

  The room is silent, save for the slight dripping from the ice melting and my breathing. My heart is pounding. Maybe he can hear it.

  I guess I’m standing, because the way he looks at me makes me reach for the chair to steady me. His white shirt is covered in blood, along with his face. He seems to have a split lip, black eyes, and a cut on his chin.

  “Axel,” I croak, having absolutely no idea what to do.

  “Going somewhere?” His gravelly voice makes me shiver as he lowers his hand, dumping the ice into the sink with a loud smash.

  “I… thought you—” This is not how I saw this going down. I don’t know what I thought would happen but definitely not this. “I—”

  “You taking my baby with you?”

  I blink at him as I try to breathe. And think. Holy fuck, he knows. I stay silent because I truly have no words.

  I clear my throat and lift my head, staring straight into his beautiful eyes. They’re like blue fire, even with black and purple surrounding them.

  “Eve promised she wouldn’t say anything.” Because that’s all I can think of.

  “Eve didn’t tell me,” he snaps.

  Swallowing, I start to back away, my mouth suddenly dry. “I’m sorry,” I whisper then stop. Screw this.

  “Actually, I’m not sorry. I know you won’t believe me, but I did not get pregnant on purpose. I—”

  “Shh.” He comes closer, and I can smell everything. Like I’ve developed the bionic nose. I smell the booze, smoke, and just him and still all I want to do is throw myself in his arms and bury my nose in his neck.

  “I’ll ask you again, you going somewhere?”

  “I was. I mean, you want me gone.”

  “I told you last night not to leave. And yet here we are.” His voice is soft, his beat-up hands that were ripped open by whatever happened with Benny seem to be bleeding again. All of that doesn’t matter as my back hits the cold wall and he traps me with both his arms and leans into me.

  “Talk to me, Cookie.” His lips are so close. Too close for me to think properly, so I tell him the truth.

  “I was planning to go—to leave and not tell you about anything, get an abortion, and move on.” I breathe out. He’s too close, and my head is spinning as I reach up to grab hold of his arms.

  “You thought I’d let you do all that?” His swollen, bloody lips caress mine and I moan. I love him so much. My tongue touches his split lip and he growls as his mouth crushes mine. It’s hard, fierce, as my tongue twists with the metallic taste of his blood, and I think I’ve lost my mind because I like it.

  He pulls back. “You’re mine.”

  I go to move, but he grabs me. “You don’t get to walk away.”

  “Why?” I hiss.

  He looks at me, frowning. I guess he didn’t think I’d ask him that. “Antoinette, come here, baby. I have no idea how you got under my skin from the first second I saw you. All I know is that I knew you were mine and that I was a selfish prick.”

  The dreaded, hated tears are already spilling. This is it. The moment he kills me with his truths, and I almost reach up to kiss him so I don’t have to face them.

  “I don’t… I told you I loved you, and you told me to leave,” I yell at him, all of a sudden angry. “Don’t you get it? I was already feeling…” I try to move away from him. It’s impossible to think when he’s this near.

  “Look at me. Tell me. Tell me everything, baby, so I can make it better.”

  “You can’t,” I yell. “I was already feeling not good enough for you and now I’m pregnant and I’ll always feel like I trapped you.” There. My dirty secret is out. His hand tightens and brings me to his warm chest.

  “Not good enough for me?” He cocks his head. “Antoinette, you are my everything.”

  “What?” I’m sobbing now, certain I’m not hearing things right.

  He smiles and my heart thuds. “Antoinette, Cookie, Candy, Van Doran, you’re my everything.” He kisses my lips and I throw my arms around his neck, not having a clue what he’s saying but not caring because I see it in his eyes and know it in my soul.

  Mitchell Axel Fontaine is in love and he loves me.

  “Maybe the Stuffed Muffins can convince you that you are my everything.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  He laughs, his lips taking mine, then whispers, “You’ll see.” He swings me into his arms and I scream, holding on to his neck.

  “We need to make sure my seed really did the job.” He tosses me on the bed as he starts to tear off his bloody clothes. He’s bruised on his abs, and his lip is bleeding again. And all I can do is stare at him. He’s so hot. His beautiful face is calm, almost peaceful, as if at war with his battered body. His eyes rake over me from head to toe, making my breath stutter.

  Fierce.

  Beautiful.

  And mine.

  AXEL

  Fifteen months later

  I can sense her looking at me through the window. Antoinette has a thing for watching me run with my girls. I feel a cool chubby hand smack me right in the lips as I straighten her hat so the heat can’t burn her fair skin. “Sweetheart, Daddy loves you, but Mommy needs to change you. You stink.”

  She starts laughing. I start baby talking to her, telling her she’s the most beautiful stinky baby in the world. As I lift her out of the Baby Bjorn, her chubby legs almost kick me in the face.

  “Come on, Michelle, be a good girl while Daddy gets your sister.” I turn my head because she truly does stink, and with the jogging, it might have leaked out of her diaper.

  Perfect.

  “If I had ovaries, they would be bursting.” Doug walks up carrying a large Starbucks coffee. “Here, let me take her.”

  Michelle tries to leap out of my arms. “Christ, Doug, put the coffee down. What are you, crazy?”

  He rolls his eyes and sets the coffee down as he takes Michelle. “Come to Uncle Dougie.” My daughter laughs as she hugs him and I fucking melt.

  “You’re so fucked, man,” Doug whispers and shakes his head as he takes her up the stairs leading to my large yellow house. Because that’s how I roll these days.

  After numerous fights, I decided that I had to agree with Antoinette. We can’t live in the clubhouse having twins.

  So, I bought the love of my life th
e house of her choice. She picked it out. It’s not on the same street as Eve and Charlie’s but close enough so we can walk over for parties.

  I look down at my sleeping beauty inside the jogger. Juliet has dark black curls and her mother’s violet eyes. She’s gentle natured, unless you make her mad, and then Michelle looks like the angel.

  In a year and a half, I’ve become a father, a homeowner, and I get to wake up to the most beautiful woman to walk this earth.

  I’d like to say this bliss was easy. It wasn’t. We’ve had lots of obstacles to overcome. Me with my reluctance to, shall we say, grow up. And her with trusting me. But we work on it and we love each other.

  “Come on, my angel.” I scoop Juliet up. Her eyes blink open and my heart aches. It’s not rational, this love I have for my family. The fear that at any time this could be taken from me makes me look up to the window at my ethereal princess. She’s laughing with Doug, but her hands are waving me inside.

  “Fucking Granger,” I grumble, causing Juliet to smile. “Not you too. It’s bad enough with your mother.” I take the steps and she opens the front door, glaring at me as I smirk.

  “What?” I look at her and grit my teeth. She looks phenomenal. Of course, she does. We’re going on our first date since the twins were born, and I’m taking her to see the Stuffed Muffins.

  I now have a Grammy sitting on the fireplace mantel. “Untouched” not only became a hit, but won Best Song, and the album won Album of the Year. Since fucking Rhys made sure I got credit as the songwriter, I’ve made so much money, I donate it to women’s shelters.

  “You know we’re taking the bike, baby.” I hand her Juliet so I can take a quick shower. “Your hair is gonna get all fucked up.”

  She smiles and holds her shoulders back. She’s wearing a tight pink T-shirt that says the Dicks on it, her flat stomach showing no indication that she ever gave birth to twins. I reach for her as I walk by.

  “Axel,” she screams. “Stop! Don’t mess me up.” She spins away.

  I mumble, “I’m definitely gonna mess you up tonight.”

  Doug lets out a tortured sound. “God, you two. Just go. Do it now, upstairs. I can’t take the—”

  “Shh, Doug. We’re late. Go get ready, Axel.” Her big eyes shift toward me and I smirk as I smack her ass in her white jeans. “You know what they say about women who wear white jeans?” I call out as I take the stairs to the master bedroom that we painted a soft celery green. French doors lead out to a balcony. And there’s a bathroom the size of a regular room. I have to say, the large tub and shower were worth every penny we spent on this place.

  All of us still stay over at the clubhouse when needed, but this has slowly become my home. I could be living in a tent in Alaska and if it had my girls, I’d be okay.

  My phone vibrates. I’m almost ready to get into the shower. I know it’s Blade saying that he and Eve are already there, so I ignore it.

  Yeah, I decided to surprise Antoinette with taking her to see them. The band’s in town for two nights at the Forum and we’re meeting up with Granger and the others after the show.

  I quickly wash, in and out of the shower in under five minutes. Thinking of my old bandmate, I remind myself I need an attitude change. Antoinette loves me. She’s not gonna run off with Granger.

  It’s been years since I’ve seen him. It’s time. I dress and run my hands through my hair, grabbing my cigarettes and car keys. I’m a dick, but my girl looks gorgeous and this is going to be a special night, so we’ll take Luscious and not my bike.

  As I walk down the steps, I hear them gossiping together.

  “Stop it, Doug. Of course, Robert will say yes.” Antoinette’s voice sounds like she’s reading a fairy tale.

  Doug messes with her hair, smiling. “Well, we shall see. I’m excited and ner—”

  “What’s up?” I saunter in and watch my twins crawl around on the floor with what looks like fifty toys all spread around. Well, Michelle crawls. Juliet rolls, but she gets everywhere as fast as her sister, so whatever.

  “Oh my God, Axel. Doug is going to ask Robert to marry him. Isn’t it romantic and wonderful?” She arches a brow at me, knowing full well how I feel about marriage.

  I nod. “Big commitment, man. I mean, that’s it, old ball and chai—” Antoinette grabs my arm, laughing and putting a hand over my mouth.

  “He doesn’t really mean it.” She says over her shoulder as I pull her close and bury my nose in her hair, inhaling my favorite scent.

  “Let’s go,” I growl, reluctantly pulling back to look down at her beautiful face.

  It hurts.

  Sometimes I love her so much it hurts when I look at her. She’s my everything, my life, my reason to get up, my favorite thing in the whole world. Lacing my hand in hers, I grab my leather jacket. I can feel her slight disappointment that Doug is going to get married and she’s not.

  It’s not that I don’t want to get married per se. It’s only that I made her my old lady already, and I don’t fuck around on her. I love her and I’ve made it clear I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with her. Why do we need that stupid piece of paper?

  Except that she wants the paper. The other day, Blade and my brothers had a sit-down with me where they stumbled their way through telling me what a woman likes. Apparently that’s a big diamond ring and a wedding.

  “Get a jacket, baby. It’ll be cold later on.” She nods, her eyes shiny as she smiles at Doug.

  “We are really happy for you, Doug.” She grabs a coffee-colored, three-quarter-length suede jacket that matches her heeled boots. Doug lifts an eyebrow at me and I visualize punching him. But I guess I’m stuck with him forever.

  “You two have fun.” He grabs Juliet who’s rolling under the kitchen table. “Say bye-bye to beautiful Mommy and Daddy.” I don’t miss the dry Daddy. Whatever. Doug is beyond biased when it comes to Antoinette.

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” She bites her bottom lip looking at Doug as I pull her to the door.

  “Cookie, he knows his way around our house better than I do.” She looks at me and blows out some air.

  “True.” She throws kisses at both the twins who seem to sense that the milk truck is leaving because they both start to fuss. I smile at Doug.

  “Good luck. We’re all counting on you.” He rolls his eyes at me and I shut the door, holding her hand as I stop at my GTO.

  She cocks her head. “What’s wrong?”

  “I love you.” I cup her face and kiss her. She moans and I deepen the kiss because after tonight, things are gonna change.

  I lift my head to gaze at her. “You ready to go see my friend and his average band?”

  “I am.” Then she jumps up and down. “I can’t wait.” Throwing my head back, I laugh as she happily gets in and tells me all about what geniuses my daughters are the whole ride to the Forum.

  “Christ.” We turn into the parking lot for the Forum, and I hand the usher my VIP pass. He directs me to the underground area where the bands arrive and leave. I pull in, let the valet take it, and we walk over to Blade and Eve.

  “About fucking time,” Blade says. Eve is talking to Rafe, manager of the Stuffed Muffins. At one time, I thought that he and my little sister had something going on. Thankfully it was not true since he’s in his fifties. We got into it, but that’s in the past and he’s nothing but smiles now.

  Blade looks at me and gives Antoinette a kiss on the cheek. She and Eve look so excited I can’t help but smile.

  “Rafe.” I nod. “This is Antoinette.”

  “You two have done well for yourselves. Look at these gorgeous creatures.” Rafe stinks of arrogance and money. He also has the attitude that he’d just as soon kill you, rather than fire you. Less paperwork for him.

  “Here you go, my princesses.” He hands them both all-access passes.

  “Axel.” He basically tosses mine to the concrete. The Forum vibrates with all the people waiting for the band.

  “Okay. We’re runnin
g late. Let’s do this.” He walks to the door and a security guard nods at him. We walk down the dark hallway, the energy crackling as people run past us.

  The lights are already going crazy and the huge screen above is playing clips of the band members.

  “Oh my God.” Antoinette smiles at me, and I grab her hips as I guide us forward. The roar of the crowd is almost deafening. I’m not gonna lie—there is nothing like playing in front of an adoring crowd. When I was with Granger, we were still small, so I never dealt with this number of people. My dick grows hard.

  I bring Antoinette’s ass to my cock. She turns and looks at me.

  I lean down to nip her ear. “Let’s go over in the corner with the spare lights. I have something to show you.”

  As she turns, Rafe interrupts us. “They’ll be coming right by. Have fun. I’ll see you after the show.”

  Suddenly the lasers change and the large flat screens show feet. The camera trails up to the drummer, Nuke. I found him playing outside Guitar Center when I was sixteen. He had a rough childhood, always kept to himself. But he could bring down the house with his drums.

  Then the bass player, Cash, walks out and salutes the camera.

  I bite her neck and pull her tighter, so I can growl in her ear. Next is my replacement, Ammo, and I snarl, “Punk.” She turns and touches my cheek, her eyes alive and shining with love.

  I’m so caught up in her that I barely hear the crowd explode. Except Antoinette starts to jump and clap as Granger walks out wearing a black T-shirt and dark jeans.

  Both Eve and Antoinette turn to look at me since we’re both dressed the same.

  Eve grabs Antoinette’s hand and I reluctantly let her go to the edge where all the crew is busy clearing the area for them to enter.

  Blade walks over, arms crossed, as he looks out at the thousands of people. A stagehand comes over with a bottle of Jack for us. I barely get the bottle open when Nuke runs by, his drumsticks twirling as 25,000-plus people go wild.

  “Axel.” I turn to Ammo. He looks good and I nod at him. He gives me a smirk and grins as he takes the stage. Women are already climbing onstage, throwing themselves at him.