Neither of us has said anything about the accident since that day after her doctor’s appointment in the parking lot. We didn’t need to and that’s how our relationship has always been. That’s what makes it work at the end of every day. We may not be perfect and we are more than likely going to make mistakes along the way but we get each other. Some people live their whole lives looking for what we have.
Kennedy walks me out to my car after we finish dinner with her parent’s. She always does this when I go to leave. I don’t know if it is because she won’t settle for a simple peck on the lips and she wants one last earth shattering one or what? Either way I don’t mind. We always sit outside for a little while just to talk. It’s my favorite part of the day.
“Are you ready for your appointment tomorrow? You’ll get to schedule your surgery at least,” I asked kissing the back of her hand.
“Yeah, it will be nice to get it out of the way and start recovering. Hell, maybe I’ll be able to dance at the talent show next year,” Kennedy smiles at me knowing that is just what I need to hear.
“I love you, Kennedy.”
“I know you do and I love you too.”
I leave her sitting on the swing as I pull out of the driveway. I wave to her as she gets up to head inside and drive home. Being blissfully wrapped up in Kennedy all day, I managed to forget to call my mom to let her know that I wasn’t going to be home for dinner. I must have left my phone in car. There are three missed calls. Being only a few minutes away, I don’t bother to call her back. Whatever she needs can wait until I walk in the door.
Pulling in the drive way after the short drive I park my car in my normal spot. The garage door is open and my father’s SUV is inside serving as a warning of what’s waiting for me inside.
I walk through the garage door that connects with the kitchen. Standing over the stove refusing to look up at me is my mother. It’s eerily quiet in the house.
“Mom…” I call walking closer towards her where she’s standing stirring something in a small pan. She looks up at me. Gasping I see a huge bruise covering her left cheek that’s clearly fresh.
“What happened?” I demand an answer from her trying to keep my voice down. Hopefully he’s already passed out.
“Where have you been, son?” My father’s voice fills the kitchen. I feel him behind me.
Son? It doesn’t sound the same coming from him as it did Mr. Conrad.
That frightened me.
“I was at Kennedy’s studying and having dinner,” I turn to explain hoping that he’s still sober.
“You selfish little prick,” he spits out with anger. I guess being sober is out of the question. He’s close enough that I can smell the…bourbon? Looks like good ol’ Dad is switching things up these days. “You fucking call next time you plan on not being home for dinner.”
I don’t know what I’m thinking before the words come out. They have their own agenda. I quickly regret them the moment they pass through my lips.
“Why do you even fucking care, Dad?” I yell in his face.
His face turns this unnatural color of murderous red. My dad is seeing blood and I’m in his eye line. I take a second to glance over where my mom’s still standing by the stove to see her holding a spoon with her eyes the size of saucers. She knows just as well as I do what’s about to happen.
I turn back towards my father. He throws the first punch followed quickly by the second. There’s no chance to dodge his fists. My right eye begins to swell within seconds after the first contact. That’s the problem with having a dad who still works out. He’s just as strong today as he was twenty years ago. I can feel the stream of blood falling from my face. I must have fallen to the ground, as I try to stand up to get my bearings I feel his hands on my shoulders shoving me back against the kitchen island. He slugs me once more in the face for good measure. The tile is cold on my skin as a fall over. There’s a temptation to lay my face down on the tile to help with the swelling. I know if I do that I will be at his boots disposal.
“John, stop it. Now,” My mother yells in my defense. He steps over me to get to her. While I’m trying to catch my breath I hear a loud snap. I turn to see my small mother barreling over holding the side of her face. I know he’s drunker than normal because he tended to avoid bruising her face. Since he already released his anger on her earlier, what’s the point in avoiding it now? That last hit will leave a lasting mark.
Once his back is turned heading out of the kitchen I get up from the ground searching for my mother who is slumped over on the ground pressed against the stove. I see the tears that always find a way of breaking my heart a little bit more every time I see them fall.
“Mom, are you okay?” I ask gently. She looks up gasping at what is probably the poor condition of my face. “I’m fine, but are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” she mouths. I let myself believe that she is because I don’t want to be in this house any longer. I can’t stay here. Deep down I know I shouldn’t be leaving her here alone. “I’m leaving. I’ll be back tomorrow.”
“Where are you going?” she asks before I walk out of the kitchen towards the garage door.
“Don’t tell Dad. I’m going to Kennedy’s for the night. I can’t stay here. I’m sorry, Mom.”
And with that I’m walking out of my parent’s house once again after dealing with my drunk of a father. I don’t have time to stop to peer in a mirror to see what damage he has done. I know it’s bad by the way it throbs with shooting pain through my face every time I move any muscle.
Kennedy isn’t going to be happy when she sees me. This is what she was talking about earlier. She’s scared for my well-being and it’s a well-deserved concern. This isn’t the first time I’ve showed up at her house with some sort of bruise or cut. She’s been far too observant. Of course she would notice when I’m hurt without me having to explain it to her. She’s just been kind enough to ignore it until now.
Chapter Forty-Five
-Kennedy-
“How are things going with you and Graham?” my mom asks. She must have been in the mood to chit chat because she very rarely comes into my room and sits on the bed. She’s making herself comfortable. It’s already twenty past eleven. Dad must have been asleep by now, which means she’s either bored or she came in here with a purpose.
“Great,” I answer quickly. I wasn’t sure where this conversation is going.
“You guys are pretty serious then?”
“Come out and say it Mom. I know you’re trying to get at something.” I sat up a little straighter to prepare myself for where this is headed.
“You love him?” she asks with a smile. I can see the concern and the hopefulness in her eyes as she the words slip from her thin lips.
“Yeah, I do. He’s a lot different than what people think. He has this reputation that follows him everywhere. Most of it is true, unfortunately. It’s just…when I look in his eyes I know there is something more to him. He’s smart and compassionate. No one else knows that side of him. It sounds crazy, doesn’t it?” I explain honestly surprised at what I’m saying to my mother.
“No it’s not. He loves you too. That’s obvious,” she pats me on the leg trying to be supportive.
We sit on my bed for a few minutes just talking about anything and everything when we hear a tap on the window. It makes us both jump then laugh at how ridiculous we are. I know without looking who it is. I frantically try to come up with an explanation for my mother who’s now getting up to check the window where Graham will be waiting. Why’s he here in the first place? I grab my phone to make sure I didn’t miss a text from him. Nothing.
My mom opens the window and stares out at Graham. It’s too dark to see him fully. I have a feeling. Something’s wrong. I jump up from my bed taking the few steps to stand in front of the window nearly knocking my mom out of the way. I need to see him.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Conrad. I’m sure this looks really bad, but I have to see Kennedy,” Graham says i
n a slow quiet voice. Something is definitely wrong. The fearfulness is in his voice.
“Mom, please let him in,” I say almost to a near panic.
“What the hell is going on exactly? I feel like I’m missing a piece of the puzzle,” my mother questions us both while looking back and forth between where I’m standing inside my room and where Graham is hiding in the shadows outside my window.
“Mom, please.” I beg for her to let him come in. I need to make sure he’s okay even though I can tell he’s not.
“Graham, get in here but I want an explanation.” She steps back from the window and paces the length of my room.
“Yes ma’am,” Graham whispers ashamed. He steps through my window as I back up to give him room. When he stands, my mom and I both take in a lung full of air when we see it. It’s hard to miss. There was no way of hiding this one, unlike a lot of the others.
“Graham. Honey, what happened?” My mom goes to get a better look. He seems uncomfortable under her watchful gaze. Someone else is going to know his secret now. I know he’s not nearly ready for all that will entail.
“Come sit down, baby.” I grab his hand to guide him over to my bed. My mom watches us with a fascination in her eyes. She’s just as observant as I am. She already senses something is going on and she knows now that I’m aware of it already.
“If you are going to sneak in my daughter’s window in the middle of the night then please explain to me who did this to you.” Her voice is soft with sympathy.
“Mom, if he tells you…” I plead. Graham tries to protest my suggestion. I wave him off. “If he tells you then it stays between us. This has to stay between us.”
The room falls silent for a few minutes. You can practically hear my father snoring from across the house. Graham reaches over to grab my hand interlocking our fingers. He traces a small circle on my thumb with his. He’s nervous. He’s never told anyone besides me about his father. There isn’t an option anymore.
“Mrs. Conrad, my father…” he lets the thought trail off looking up at my waiting mother. She smiles sadly at him knowing where the confession is going. “He drinks. He drinks a lot. It started when I was eleven I think. He only does it when he’s drunk which tends to be more and more these days. No one knows because of my mother. Somehow she loves him still. I don’t know if it’s the cushy lifestyle he gives her or if she truly can’t stop loving him. I learned at a young age that if I let him take it out on me then he would leave her alone, so that’s why I’ve never told anyone. That is until I met Kennedy.”
She let it all soak in before saying anything. You can tell the wheels are turning in her head. This is a big secret to have to keep. I’m not sure she’ll be able to do that for Graham.
“I’m going to go get you some ice and Tylenol, sweetie. You’re going to need it,” she pats him on the leg in a comforting way only a mother is capable of.
Once she walks out of the room I turn to face him. I just need to touch him to make sure he’s alright. I wrap my arms around his waist and cuddle in next to him trying to ease some of his anxiety.
“You’re going to be fine,” I whisper into his chest.
“Can I stay tonight?” Graham whispers.
We hadn’t noticed her standing in the doorway. I don’t know how long she had been standing watching us, but I can’t find it in me to care.
“Graham, you can stay here. We’ll keep it between us. Kennedy’s father wouldn’t be thrilled, but something tells me that you need my daughter right now,” she explains with rather wet eyes.
This is why Graham doesn’t like people to know. He knew people would feel sorry for him. There’s a certain pity that comes along with dark family secrets like Graham’s.
“Thank you, Mrs. Conrad. I really do appreciate it.” Graham stands to walk to my mom hugging her for the first time. She wraps her arms around him holding him for a minute or so. He needs it more from her than he does me. He isn’t used to having adults fussing over him.
My mom cups his face in her hands looking him over once more. “You promise me that if you ever need anything that you’ll come to us.” She looks around him glancing over to me. “Get some sleep.”
Before we can say anything she’s gone. She is going to let him sleep in my bed. This is awkward.
Graham walks to my bathroom without looking back at me. I give him a few minutes to himself before I walk in. We need to talk about what happened tonight. I find him in front of the mirror inspecting his eye hissing out in pain when he touches the bruises and cuts.
“Kennedy, I just need a minute if that’s okay?” Graham turns to face me. There’s emptiness in his eyes. He’s far away. I allow my mind to think for a split second that he could have been easily been taken from me tonight in a blink of an eye.
“I’m not leaving. You can get that out of your thick skull. Tell me what happened,” I demand. I hike myself up onto the vanity countertop pulling him in between my legs. I run my fingers over his head, down his jawline over his neck and down his arms. It’s my way of convincing myself that he’s standing in front of me still in one piece. One battered piece.
“There’s not much to tell. I came home and he wasn’t supposed to be back until tomorrow. He was mad that I didn’t call my mom to tell her I wouldn’t be home for dinner and I sort of snapped back at him. He threw a few punches and slapped my mom. Just a normal day in the Black household,” Graham shrugs his shoulders like it isn’t a big deal. I hate the way he dismisses the severity of it all.
“This is what I’m talking about, Graham. You can’t keep living like this. It’s not fair to you or your mom. He’s going to go too far at some point. I’m going to get a call someday telling me that you’re dead. I don’t want to get that call, do you understand me? I can’t live without you in this world.” I confess in a state of panic. Graham brushes my tears away then kisses the skin where they once were.
“Can we just go to bed please?” Graham asks. I know I should have argued. Should have put up a bigger fight to get what I needed from him. It’s the look in his eyes that have me relenting from my inquisition.
“Yeah, we can go to bed.” I jump from the counter reaching for his hand guiding him back to my room. I pull back the covers just as I had the first night he stayed here waiting for him to climb in. He pulls off his clothes until he was standing in just his boxer briefs. Once we are both comfortably under the comforter, I curl into the nook of his body where I fit perfectly. It’s as if he’s made for me. I just hope he lives long enough to realize it.
Chapter Forty-Six
-Graham-
Kennedy and I lie in her bed without saying anything to each other for several minutes. Neither of us knows what to say. Nothing seems appropriate. She said her peace about everything. She has every right to be worried after how I showed up at her house tonight. Now her Mom knows everything. It felt nice to have her mom embrace me the way she did. Usually after my father had an episode, my mother was too busy trying to talk him down that she doesn’t have time to check on me. I never knew that was something I needed until Mrs. Conrad held onto me tonight.
Kennedy is running her fingers up and down my arm drawing a pattern that I can’t quite place. I grab her hand to stop her. She scoots over to rest her head on my chest.
“I love you,” she whispers into my skin with such conviction. It’s just loud enough for me to hear.
“I know. I love you, too,” I whisper into her hair. She props herself up on an elbow and plants a kiss on my lips quickly. Neither of us turns off her bedside lamp. I can see the worry all over her face.
“It won’t last forever. I’ll be out of here before we know it,” I say softly playing with her hair that falls down her back.
“Yeah, you’re right.” Kennedy’s voice is apprehensive like she doesn’t quite believe that.
“What’s wrong? I can hear it in your voice and see it on your face.”
Kennedy sits in silence. I can tell she’s mulling it over in he
r head. She always does this when she’s really thinking about her answer. She forces a smile before she speaks.
“What’s going to happen when you go off to college?” she asks softly.
“What do you mean?”
“What I mean is what is going to happen with us? You’re going to go to Georgia and I’m going to be going to New York hopefully. Where does that leave us?”
I now understood the tone in her voice. She’s worried about what will become of our relationship. I don’t know what to tell her either. I don’t have the fix-all answers to her worries and insecurities.
“Ken, we have a whole year to worry about that. We will figure it out when the time comes. Let’s not wrap ourselves in the future too much that we forget to enjoy each other right now.” I explain honestly. I know at some point we are going to go opposite directions and I’m not sure what will become of us when that day arrives. Honestly, I don’t want to think about it either. For now I want to ignore the inevitable that will tear us apart.
“You’re right.” She leans up to kiss me before flicking the light off. She curls back into me where she fits perfectly. There is no better way to fall asleep than with her in my arms.
I wake up the next morning still holding onto Kennedy. It’s also the best way to wake up. Neither of us has opened our eyes yet until we hear her bedroom door opening slowly. I’m afraid to look to see who it is just in case Mr. Conrad had decided to check on his daughter this morning. There is a dip in the mattress and I know right away that it’s Mrs. Conrad. Kennedy and I both look down at her at the same time. Talk about awkward.
“Good morning,” Mrs. Conrad whispers.
“Good morning,” Kennedy and I answer at the same time.
“Your father left early this morning, so it’s safe to come out. I made pancakes.”
“Thanks Mom,” Kennedy sits up looking over to me. Mrs. Conrad let me sleep in her daughters bed last night then made me breakfast this morning. This is a first.
When Our Worlds Collide Page 30