by Connie Mason
“What will you do?”
Angus’s encompassing look took in the rank rushes on the floor, the aging, drafty hall, and the indefensible wooden curtain wall, and gave a scornful snort. “Sinclair Keep holds no fond memories for me. I havena tended to the upkeep, for I assumed I would be living at Braeburn one day.”
“We could wed and start anew in the Lowlands,” Seana suggested.
“You expect me to wed you, a woman whose own father doesna want her?” Angus sneered. “Nay, I have other plans. I intend to flee, but not with you. I am in possession of a good sword arm and will offer my services to the king and make my living as a mercenary. Those of my kinsmen who wish to accompany me can do so. I care not what you do, Seana McHamish.”
Seana grasped his arm. “You intend to abandon me? I have done naught to gain your enmity. What will I do? Where will I go?”
“You are the cause of all my problems. Think you I believe you had naught to do with Gillian’s escape? I amna stupid. If you came here seeking succor, you came to the wrong place. I plan to gather what valuables remain in the keep and leave while the weather still holds. You may do as you damn well please.”
Turning on his heel, Angus left to consult with his kinsmen. Seana stared after him with searing hatred. What was she to do now?
Ravenscraig Tower
Ross rarely left Gillian alone after her close call with death, though Gillian didn’t seem to welcome his company. Gizela had insisted that Gillian remain in bed several days following her mishap. Though Ross knew little about medicine, he made sure Gillian followed Gizela’s orders. When all seemed well with the bairn a sennight after her fall, Gillian was allowed to leave her bed.
She had just finished dressing when Ross entered the bedchamber and roared a protest. “What are you doing out of bed? Are you deliberately trying to harm our bairn?”
Gillian gave an exasperated snort. “Leave off, Ross. Gizela gave me permission to get out of bed. My bairn and I are both fine. I fully intend to carry him to term.”
Ross sent Gillian a skeptical look. “I suppose if Gizela has pronounced you well, then I shouldna protest,” he relented. “I’ll escort you down to the hall to break your fast.”
“I can see myself down, thank you.”
Ross shook his head. “Gillian, lass, why are you still angry with me? Did I nae bare my heart to you? Did I nae send Seana away, as you requested?”
Gillian sighed heavily. “Aye, you did, Ross, but I canna forgive you for denying our bairn. You should have kenned I was lying when I told you Angus and I had become lovers.”
Ross pushed an impatient hand through his thick hair. “I amna a mind reader. ’Tis past time you forgave me. I want us to be a family, sweeting. I want to go to bed with you at night and wake up with you in my arms in the morning.”
Gillian refused to meet his gaze. Unwilling to let the gap between them widen, Ross reached for her, pulling her gently into his embrace. “Mayhap you will believe this.”
He lowered his mouth and kissed her. Rather than fight him, Gillian wanted to cleave to him, to become his love, his life, but her pride kept getting in the way. And logic argued that a man did not declare his love for a woman he had once considered an enemy. Ross wanted his bairn, not her.
To Gillian’s disquiet, Ross’s kisses affected her as they always did, leaving her craving more. It seemed like forever since she had been in his arms this way. Of their own accord her arms lifted and twined around his neck. With a soft growl of triumph, he brought her closer, held her tighter, enveloping her in the heat of his warrior’s body. His kisses grew desperate, deepened, as his hands roamed freely over her back and bottom.
Despite her body’s response to Ross’s attempt to arouse her, Gillian resisted his seduction. She would know when her heart found the forgiveness Ross requested, and it wasn’t now. Removing her arms from his neck and placing her hands against his chest, she pushed him away. Dropping his arms, Ross stepped back. She could tell it pained him to stop, but she wasn’t ready yet to let him make love to her.
“Forgive me, lass. You are newly recovered from your fall. I had no right to press myself on you. But heed me well: I willna give up on you.”
Gillian had little doubt that Ross was right. How could she resist a man who had declared his love so sweetly? But meanwhile, it wouldn’t hurt him to suffer a wee bit of rejection.
Gillian knew she would allow Ross in her bed again, but she intended to speak to Gizela about her readiness to make love after her fall. She would do naught to harm her bairn.
Ross escorted Gillian to the hall. To Gillian’s surprise and delight, she received a warm welcome from Ross’s kinsmen. Everything that had happened in the past seemed to have been forgotten in the light of the news that Gillian was carrying their laird’s heir.
Both Gordo and Niall were already in their places at the high table. They rose when Gillian entered the hall and stood until she was seated.
“You’re looking well, lass,” Gordo said. “Ross has been worried sick over you.”
“He was worried about the bairn,” Gillian maintained.
“Mayhap, though I doubt the bairn was his only concern.”
Niall cleared his throat. “Gillian, do you really believe Seana pushed you down the stairs?”
Gillian looked at Niall, saw the devastation Seana had wrought, and wished she had the answer Niall sought. “Aye, Niall. As much as it pains me to admit it. Seana isna the woman you thought you knew. She is evil. She tried to poison Ross, and she drugged you. ”Tis time you opened your eyes to her true nature.”
“Thank you for being truthful. I fancied myself in love with Seana. I thought my love could change her, but apparently I was wrong.”
“You are better off without Seana,” Ross said. “I regret my past association with her, for she brought naught but trouble to Ravenscraig.”
“Amen,” Gordo added.
Gillian ate her meal in silence. Hanna had gone out of the way to please her, tempting her delicate digestion with her favorite foods. To Gillian’s relief, everything stayed down.
“I’ve neglected my duties of late,” Ross said after he had eaten his fill. “Some of the lads and I intend to inspect the livestock today. Will you be all right? I’m leaving Gordo in charge of the keep during my absence.”
“I’m fine, Ross, truly. Alice and I will be counting linen and inspecting stores today.”
Ross frowned. “Doona overdo it your first day out of bed.” Before he left, he lifted her chin and kissed her mouth.
Ross didn’t leave the keep immediately. While Niall and the others were saddling the horses and loading sacks of feed, Ross went in search of Gizela. He found her in the stillroom, grinding roots and herbs she used for medicinal purposes.
“There you are, Gizela,” Ross greeted her.
Gizela studied Ross through eyes brimming with intelligence and mystery. “Aye, laird, I was expecting you, and have an answer to your question.”
Ross stopped in his tracks, astonished by her words.
“You ken what I want?”
“Aye, laird, I do. Gillian is healed and her bairn is safely entrenched within her. If she wishes it, you may return to her bed and love her without fear of harming her or your son.”
Ross never blushed, was rarely embarrassed, yet he could feel his cheeks heating now. Then something Gizela had said captured his attention. “I’m going to have a son?”
“Aye, didna Gillian tell you?”
“Nay, Gillian is angry with me.”
“Her anger wanes, laird.”
“You know this?”
“I know many things.”
“Tell me how I can earn Gillian’s love.”
Gizela’s sagging features eased as her lips turned up into a smile. “You canna gain her love, laird.”
Ross’s heart plummeted. “Are you saying Gillian will never love me?”
“Nay, laird, I am saying you already have her love. Go now and leave me to
my work.”
Ross’s laughter followed him out the door and into the cold, crisp air. Gillian loved him. Now all he had to do was get her to admit it.
Lingering over her breakfast, Gillian conversed briefly with Gordo. She gasped in surprise when he asked, “Why are you tormenting the lad, Gillian? Any fool can see he loves you. I admit I didna think your marriage would work, but you and my nephew are matched in strength and stubbornness. I ken you love him but are too stubborn to admit it.”
Gillian swallowed hard. Was she that easy to read? “Is it so obvious?”
“It is to me, and I’m sure others ken it as well. Are you nae pleased about the bairn you’re carrying?”
“I am thrilled about the bairn, Gordo. ’Tis Ross I amna pleased with.” She hesitated, then said, “He questioned whether the bairn is his. I find it difficult to forgive him.”
“Och, the man is a fool. I know his careless words hurt you, but you canna blame him. I, too, heard you proclaim that you and Sinclair were lovers. I wasna the only witness when you renounced Ross and your marriage.”
“I explained my reasons for lying to Ross. I did it to save his life. He should have kenned I was lying.”
“Will you ever forgive him, lass?”
“Mayhap, after he has suffered a wee bit more.” She rose. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to confer with Gizela.”
Gillian left the hall in a thoughtful mood. Had Ross suffered enough? Was it time to tell him she loved him? Mayhap she should end Ross’s misery and let him make love to her—after she consulted with Gizela, of course.
Gillian located Gizela in the stillroom. She greeted the healer warmly. If not for Gizela, neither she nor Ross would be alive today.
Gizela turned at her greeting. “If people doona stop interrupting me, I will be forced to neglect my work. Are you unwell, lass?”
“I am well, and so is my baim, thanks to you, Gizela. I have a question to ask of you.”
“In truth, I was expecting you, so I will save you the trouble of asking your question and give you my answer. ”Tis time to forgive your husband. Your marriage was written in the stars long before you were born. Welcome the laird into your bed, lass. Naught he can do will harm you. Your bairn willna leave your body until the appointed time. Go now; can you nae see I am busy?”
Suppressing a smile, Gillian left the stillroom. Though most people thought Gizela a wee bit daft, her psychic powers were uncanny. Gillian didn’t doubt Gizela’s word. She believed her bairn was in no danger and that she would carry it to term, because the healer had said so.
She also knew it was time to heal her marriage, for her heart demanded it of her. She and Ross had started out as enemies and suffered through countless trials and tribulations to be together. The time had come to make things right between them.
The day flew by as Gillian went about her duties. The linens were counted and the stores inspected. Everything was in good order. Gillian spoke to Hanna about preparing a special meal that evening and serving it to her and Ross in the solar. They would dine alone tonight, with naught to distract them.
Gillian ordered a bath and soaked in the tub until the water cooled. Afterward, Alice brushed out her hair and helped her into a filmy night rail and chamber robe. Then she ordered the tub emptied and refilled with clean water for Ross.
After Alice and the servants left, Gillian walked to the window and watched the snow fall, her mind stumbling over the words she wanted to say to Ross tonight. After long minutes of silent contemplation, she decided to say whatever was in her heart.
Ross entered the hall in a rush of cold air and blowing snow. He stomped the snow from his boots and headed for the hearth to warm his bones. He and the lads had had a busy day. They had rescued several head of cattle from snowdrifts, rounded up a few lost sheep, and delivered feed so the livestock wouldn’t starve.
Ross was warming his backside when he noticed that Gillian wasn’t in the hall. Disappointment rode him; he had hoped his wife would be on hand to greet him. Disappointment turned to concern. Had Gillian taxed her strength her first day out of bed?
He strode to the staircase; Alice met him on the bottom landing. “Your lady is waiting for you in the solar, laird.”
Gillian was waiting for him? Had he heard aright? Though Ross had no idea what to expect, he took the stairs two at a time. He burst into the solar, his gaze searching the chamber for his wife. The first thing he saw was a tub of steaming water sitting before the hearth.
“Gillian? Alice said ...”
His words fell silent when Gillian turned away from the window and greeted him with a smile. “I’m glad you’re home, Ross.”
Ross felt as if the floor had dissolved beneath his feet. Gillian was dressed informally in night rail and robe, her long hair framing her face in a halo of living flame. What was she up to now? Didn’t she know she was tormenting him?
“You must be frozen,” Gillian said. “The bath is for you. Shall I help you disrobe?”
Gillian wanted to help him undress? He blinked. Had he heard aright? Had the cold frozen his brain? “Are you well, sweeting?”
Slowly Gillian walked toward Ross, her gaze intent upon his face. “l am verra well, thank you. Let me take your plaid. Your bathwater is growing cold.”
Ross watched warily as Gillian removed the woolen plaid from his shoulders and helped him out of his jacket. When she undid the strings at the neck of his shirt and pulled it over his head, he felt his cock grow hard and his body clamor with desperate need. Seeing Gillian like this reminded him why she was the only woman he wanted, the woman he would protect and love the rest of his life. Was she finally willing to be a wife to him again? Was she ready to release him from his misery?
Words failed him as he pulled Gillian against him, letting her feel the thick ridge of his need. His heart thudded wildly when, instead of resisting, she melted into his embrace and raised her face for his kiss. Ross didn’t hesitate. Lowering his head, he met her lips, savoring her sweet taste while his tongue ravished her tenderly. Something had changed Gillian, and he wasn’t going to question it.
Long moments later Ross drew back, his voice hoarse with need as he whispered against her lips, “I want to love you, wife. My body aches for you.”
“I want that too,” Gillian breathed, “Bathe first. Then we can talk, and afterward we will make love.”
“Or we can love first and then talk while I bathe,” Ross suggested, as eager as a green boy to be inside his wife again, to feel her body writhe against his.
“We have a lifetime to love,” Gillian replied.
A lifetime; the word was music to Ross’s ears. “Then I had best get on with the bathing.” He chuckled.
Ross finished disrobing and climbed into the tub. Gillian knelt behind him, rubbed soap on a cloth, and began scrubbing his back. When she moved around to his chest, Ross’s cock jerked upright in reaction. He didn’t know how much of this sweet torment he could stand.
“Give me that,” Ross said, snatching the cloth from her hand. “I had best wash myself. Fetch the drying cloth. I can wait no longer for my wife.”
Gillian retrieved the drying cloth from the hearthstone and handed it to Ross. Smiling, he rose from the tub. Water streamed from his powerful body; his cock thrust upward from a nest of ebony curls. His face stark with unconcealed desire, he held out his arms so she could dry him.
Her hands shaking, Gillian ran the cloth over his warrior’s body, loving the way it hardened beneath her touch. She had missed Ross, missed his body next to hers in bed, yearned for his kisses, his passion.
“What did I do to earn your forgiveness?” Ross asked. “Not that I’m complaining, mind you. This mom you were implacable and unforgiving. I was at my wit’s end.”
Gillian dropped the drying cloth and met his probing gaze. “We are nae enemies, Ross. Though my heart was sorely hurt, I realized that rejecting you wasna the answer. Before I could heal, I needed to forgive.” She took a steadying breath. �
�I do love you, Ross, and I forgive you. I have loved you for a verra long time. My father must have kenned that we would suit before he proposed uniting our clans. But we needed to learn that for ourselves.”
Ross closed his eyes to better savor her words. When he opened them, Gillian was smiling at him, her green eyes misty with unshed tears. “You are wise for your years, Gillian MacKay. I loved you as a warrior woman, but I love you better as the mother of my bairns.”
“No more talk, Ross. Just love me. Almost dying has shown me that life is too short to waste on pettiness. You have apologized, and I believe you have suffered enough. I have suffered enough.” She lifted her arms to him.
Groaning, Ross enfolded her in his embrace, bent his head, and kissed her, his fingers twining in her fiery hair to hold her head in place. He ravished her mouth until they were both breathless, and then he lowered her onto the fur rug before the hearth.
Trembling with need, he knelt beside her, untied the belt of her robe, and pulled it free. Then he rid her of her night rail, baring her glowing white flesh to his appreciative gaze. The gripping need inside him tightened. His breath came heavily as he kissed her mouth, her throat, her breasts. He wanted to devour her, every precious inch.
His voice vibrated hotly against the quivering flesh of her stomach as he said, “I want to taste you.”
He stared into her eyes as his hands slid beneath her to cup the twin globes of her buttocks, his fingers slowly squeezing and kneading. The throbbing between her legs intensified; she arched violently when his thumbs parted her feminine folds, stroked, and slowly circled the tiny hidden nub of her sex.
“Ross ...” The word died in her throat when Ross bent and pressed his mouth against her dewy cleft. A jolt of pleasure shot through her. Gasping, she went rigid.
Ross lifted his head and gazed at her so intently, Gillian felt scorched by it. She reached up and stroked his cheek. “I love you, Ross.”