by Becky Black
“I suppose not. So what’s the plan? I won’t let them intimidate me, but what if they go after Gracie?”
Raine sipped his coffee, frowning, clearly thinking it through. “You should be okay up here, where help is close by. But you’re in the most danger in the food container. How about I have one of my people accompany you and Gracie when you go down to collect stores?”
“You can spare someone to go with us?”
“You only take an hour or so every couple of days.” With the daily check-ins, he must know Kit’s routine as well as he knew his own. “It’s not a problem. Cargo security is part of our job, so they can do a general inspection when they’re down there.”
“Okay, if you think it’s best.” Kit glanced at the clock on the wall. “Damn, it’s so late. I should be in your bed by now.” That made Raine flush, always a fun sight. “How come you’re here yourself, by the way? Shouldn’t you be off duty?”
“My duty officer called me. Said something about assuming I’d want to know since it involves you. I thought he just meant, you know, you being a stowaway, but I wonder if he meant something else.”
“Raine, if you don’t think every single one of your security team knows we’re screwing, you’re even more oblivious than I thought.” He smiled, moved in closer to Raine, resting one knee on the bench. “I’ll be done here in a few minutes. You still want me to come to your cabin?”
“Of course.” Raine looked up at him and slid one hand up his thigh, around his waist.
“Maybe even sleep there?”
“If you like.”
Kit had slept there a couple more times since the container incident. When he didn’t, it wasn’t because he thought Raine didn’t want him there but due to lack of space. He bent down to kiss Raine, who made a sound of protest, but Kit quickly stifled it. Yes, they were in public. Yes, someone might walk in any minute, but so what?
Trish walked in. He heard her footsteps and lifted his head quickly when it occurred to him that the “what” of “so what?” was that he was still at work.
“Ah, sorry,” Trish said. “Didn’t know you were still here. You can head out, Kit. I’ll lock up.”
“Thanks, Trish.” Raine had taken his hand off Kit’s hip, but he didn’t pull away when Kit took his hand as they stood. “See you tomorrow.” He walked out, keeping Raine’s hand in his.
“Ah, Kit. Not sure about this,” Raine said as they walked.
“What?”
“Hands. It’s not professional.”
“It’s practically midnight, and you aren’t on duty. Lighten up.”
“I have lightened up.” Raine looked so defensive, it made Kit laugh, which only made Raine bristle more. “I’ve made a real effort the last few days not to be so stiff.”
“I like you stiff.”
“Knock it off. You know what I mean. You were right. I was being too cautious, too conscious of what everyone thought. And then, the thing with Taylor… You showed loyalty to your friend and the ship. I don’t have a reason to be ashamed of being involved with someone like that. Whatever else you’ve done.”
“Damn, you were doing so well.”
“What? Look…” He stopped, making Kit turn toward him. “Why don’t you tell me exactly what happened, how you ended up on the run?”
“You won’t believe me, though, will you? Or if you do, it will only be because you’re screwing me.”
“Are you suggesting I’m blinded by lu-lust?”
Kit frowned at the slight stammer on the last word. He couldn’t have been about to say another word starting with a “luh” sound, could he?
“Doesn’t matter.” Kit walked on, still holding Raine’s hand. He didn’t want to tell Raine about Jeff, not yet. They walked in silence until they stepped onto the elevator. Kit wondered, as he did every time he used the elevator, if this was the same car they’d met in. Kissed in. Who’d have thought one little kiss would lead to all this? Though, it was a hell of a kiss. He smiled at Raine.
“What?” Raine said.
“Nothing. I can’t even get mad at you properly anymore. You’re such a bad influence on me.”
“I think it’s the other way around.”
“Could be. Does me being a member of the crew make a difference to you?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never dated a member of the crew before.”
Dated? There’s an idea. They hadn’t had what you could call an actual “date.” Kit would have to plan something.
“First time for everything,” Kit said.
“The crew thing is only a technicality, though.”
“But haven’t you ever heard of someone getting off on a technicality?”
* * *
Nights were good, but Raine had started to appreciate his off-duty days more, since they often led to a little joy in the afternoon, or even the morning, when Kit came looking for a way to fill in the time between the meals in the galley.
The morning was more rare, since between breakfast cleanup, collecting food stores, and his morning report to the security office, Kit barely had time to turn around. So it was a nice surprise to get up from his bunk to answer the door to Kit about 0930 a few days after the late-night incident in the galley.
“Morning, handsome,” Kit said. “I didn’t wake you up, did I?”
Raine rubbed his unshaven chin. Unprecedented at this time of day. “Yes. I was sleeping in. You’ve worn me out. Come in.”
Kit came in looking annoyingly smug at being responsible for Raine’s disheveled appearance. Disheveled fit. His hair stuck up—he needed to take the clippers to it—and he wore only shorts, socks, and a T-shirt he’d hastily pulled on to answer the door. Far from his usual ready-for-inspection perfection.
“Oh, I see you have the furnace on again,” Kit said and began shedding his clothes. God, Raine loved the way he stripped unselfconsciously.
“I’ll turn the heat down.”
“No, leave it. You’ll only go and put on your damn bathrobe.” Naked already, Kit lounged on the bed, grinning and inviting.
“What have you got against my bathrobe?”
“Its entire existence. C’mere, then, big fella.”
Raine still felt only half-awake, but climbing onto the bed and shuffling around until Kit straddled him soon woke him and his cock up. Kit eased Raine’s shorts off and brought the cock to full readiness with his hand.
“I’ll leave your shirt on,” Kit said, “because otherwise you’ll want to turn the heat up to the point my hair will catch fire.” He stroked his thumb lazily up and down Raine’s cock, making him writhe and breathe out in a snort. “So what do you fancy for this little wake-up call?”
“B-blowjob. Please.”
“Good. I’m ravenous. Okay, hold on to your socks.”
Kit’s mouth felt deliciously cool in comparison to the warmth of the room, which had an even more stimulating effect on Raine. He reached down to stroke his hand through Kit’s hair, restraining himself from pulling him down. Kit’s head bobbed up and down faster and faster, and Raine couldn’t hold on long, began to pant and gasp, taking his hand off Kit’s head, fearing he’d pull his hair despite vowing not to. Instead he grabbed the edges of the mattress at each side of him and clung on tightly while his hips pushed up at Kit. Kit’s hands on his thighs steadied him, and then he moved one of them to roll Raine’s balls lightly in his fingers, and Raine released instantly with a strangled cry. Oh God, yes. My God, my love. Kit, my love.
The words in his mind didn’t fade as the orgasm did. They echoed. Over and over.
My love. My love.
Kit lay on top of him, his cock pushing against Raine’s belly, and Raine knew he had to return the favor. But he was too paralyzed right this second by the echo on his head. At last he shook himself, dismissing it. He’d been coming. The nearest a sane man got to not being in his right mind. Thoughts at the moment of orgasm were not…real. Or rather, they didn’t mean anything. He didn’t love Kit. He couldn’t. The
guy drove him mad, the cheeky little scofflaw. Okay, he’d been better the last few days. And when the chips were down, he’d shown his true colors, leaving Raine more well-disposed to him. But that didn’t mean he loved him.
Just because he slept over more and more often…
It didn’t mean anything.
“Hey, don’t you dare fall asleep on me, you big lug.”
Raine smiled, opened his eyes, and looked into Kit’s flushed face and urgent eyes.
“I want you inside me, Kit.”
“Thought you’d never ask.” Kit grabbed the lube as Raine turned over onto his front. Raine would have liked to have tried it face-to-face with Kit, but the narrow bunk didn’t give him the room he needed. One day, he thought, as Kit dropped kisses on his shoulders and back, working his way down, his hair caressing Raine’s skin. Goose bumps rose where it swept down his side. Maybe one day they would share a big bed and have the room to try every position going. But not today. Kit landed a kiss on Raine’s left butt cheek, then started preparing him, probing lubed fingers into him and making Raine groan and writhe.
“I can’t hang on,” Kit said, sounding like he was gritting his teeth. “I should take longer with this, but I’m about ready to pop.”
“Do it,” Raine said, looking back over his shoulder. “I can take whatever you’ve got to give.”
“Tough guy, huh?” Kit had a condom on already, and as Raine watched, he pushed in quickly. Raine groaned, dropped his head down between his arms.
“Did I hurt you? I’ll stop if—”
“Don’t stop. Doesn’t hurt.” A small white lie. But the pain was easing quickly. He glanced back again, seeing the concern on Kit’s face. “You’re just bigger than I’ve had before.” That might be a great big white lie, but it certainly put a smile on Kit’s face. No man minded hearing that one.
“You’re just buttering me up,” Kit said, making a few cautious thrusts, growing more confident as Raine showed no more signs of pain, swallowing down groans.
“Sorry,” Raine said.
“I’m not complaining. Keep going.”
Raine laughed. There was no more pain, only a building tension and heat. His cock rubbed on the bedclothes, and he wished he could get his hand on it. Never mind. He’d come with or without his hand. Kit’s cock rubbing his prostate would see to that.
“Oh God, Raine.” Kit’s voice was strained. His thrusts were hard, growing faster. He was going to come. Too soon. Raine wasn’t as close, and he didn’t want this to be over yet.
“Kit,” he said, “count backward from one hundred.”
“What?”
“Slow you down.”
“Damn.” Kit groaned. “You’re not ready to come yet?”
“Too soon after the last one. Not as young as you.”
“I knew you were too old for me. Okay, I’m counting.”
“I don’t hear you.”
“I’m counting in my head. Shut up, you made me lose count.” His thrusts steadied into a slower rhythm. Looking back at him, Raine saw his face twisted in concentration, eyes closed. His hair hung limp, sticking to his shoulders, damp with sweat.
So beautiful. Damn him, why’d he have to be so hot? Why did he have to show up and make this huge mess out of Raine’s perfectly nice life? Why did Raine have to love him?
“Can’t go any longer,” Kit gasped. “Trying to hold on. Can’t.”
“Do it,” Raine moaned. “Do it. I’m there too. Do it!”
Kit slammed into him hard, more times than he expected, until Raine was coming, feeling the warmth spreading up his belly and chest. Until Kit shuddered and released, clinging to Raine’s shoulders, leaning over so his hair stuck to Raine’s back.
“Fuck,” Kit moaned as he collapsed at Raine’s side. “Fuck, that’s good.”
“How far did you get?” Raine asked, pulling him closer.
“How far?”
“Counting.”
“Sixty-nine.” Kit smirked. Raine rolled his eyes.
“You’re such a liar.”
“Well, I kept losing count.” He stroked the tips of his fingers through Raine’s short hair. “I wish you’d grow this. I bet it’s a beautiful auburn.”
“It’s brown. Nothing special.” But he couldn’t help smiling. Kit sighed and rested against him, eyes closed.
Sleep, Raine thought. He deserved it after all that exertion. It had been good, but Raine shouldn’t make a big deal of it, he told himself. Just because he didn’t ask for penetration unless he was with someone he trusted. Just because he asked Kit for it, that didn’t mean… Oh, what the hell is wrong with me?
“You okay?” Kit asked, looking over at him. “You’re all thundery of brow.”
“Sorry. I’m okay. I was…ah… thinking about a meeting we had with the ore-plant managers yesterday.” Better than explaining the real reason. I love you and it’s scaring the hell out of me.
“When I was fucking you, you were thinking about a meeting? Were you trying to slow yourself down too?”
“No,” he said, chuckling. “Having you here reminded me about it, because they responded to the complaint the captain made about the incident the other night.”
“Oh yes?” Kit leaned up on one elbow, his head resting on his hand. He slid his other hand under Raine’s shirt and traced delightful little swirls and circles with his fingertips. Raine had one arm trapped under Kit, around his waist, palm flat and fingers spread to touch as much of the cool skin as he could.
“They weren’t exactly helpful,” Raine said. Kit didn’t look surprised. He must have heard Raine complain about those people often enough to predict their degree of likely helpfulness in any situation. “They said they haven’t been able to identify the men—even though we gave them clear pictures from our security feeds—and I don’t have access to their full personnel database. They talked like they didn’t give a damn. The captain said we’ll be putting in an official complaint to their head office, but they didn’t care.”
“Dicks.”
“It just ticks me off when they show such disrespect to the captain.”
The anger in his voice made Kit look at him, surprised. “You’re um, a loyal guy.”
“She’s my captain.”
“Yeah. She’s your commanding officer, right?”
“Yes.”
“Thing is, she isn’t theirs. Those ore-plant guys, I mean. To them she’s only a contractor.”
“What?”
Kit shook his head. “Sheesh, Raine. You think you’re still in the military, don’t you? You think Dryden’s got power of life and death over everyone on the ship.”
“She has.”
“Her crew, yes. But not the ore plant. To them you’re a haulage company, getting them and their ore where they need to go.”
“I’m not stupid, Kit. I know this is a merchant ship, not a military one.”
“Are you sure you know? Deep down, I mean?”
Raine sighed and rubbed his eyes, ready for more sleep after their exertions. “Maybe you’re right. I do need to think differently.”
“It would make life easier for you. Think corporate. What’s the company for?”
“Hauling cargo.”
“Making money, dummy. Hauling cargo is the way they do it, but the company exists to make money. You should keep this in mind.”
“I’m getting a headache.”
“Good thing I’m due back at work, then.” He slithered across Raine, which felt nice enough to start Raine’s motor running again. He watched Kit grab a towel and head for the shower.
“Think you’ll have time to come back this afternoon?”
“Good lord, are you the same Raine I met all those weeks ago? Mr. One-Fuck-a-Year-Will-Do-Me?”
“You’ve unleashed a monster.”
“Don’t flatter yourself.” He vanished into the shower. Raine dozed, listening to him singing in there. But he revived long enough to watch lazily when Kit emerged to dry off and dress again,
putting on a show worth staying awake for.
“See you later, my monster,” Kit said, pulling a sheet up over Raine and bending down to kiss him before he left.
“Later.” Raine spoke only as the door closed. “My love.”
Chapter Twelve
It didn’t mean anything, Raine argued with himself for the umpteenth time. Three days had passed since the crazy idea of being in love with Kit had first crossed his mind, and he was still trying to convince himself it didn’t mean anything even if he was. He’d been in love before. He would be again. Love didn’t have to mean eternal love. It could be—usually was—a passing thing based mostly on physical attraction.
“Hello, Chief. So we’ve finally lured you into this den of sin.”
Raine glanced around the captain’s ready room. As dens of sin went, it appeared innocuous. The only evidence of sin he could see were the decks of cards and box of poker chips waiting on the table for the officers’ poker game.
“I thought I’d try my luck, ma’am.”
Kit’s fault. He’d apparently decided Raine needed coaching in how to be corporate. When Raine had mentioned he didn’t attend the card game on principle, since gambling was against regulations, Kit had scoffed and told him it wasn’t about gambling but something he called networking. In the army, it had definitely been about gambling.
For the sake of a quiet life, Raine had agreed to give it a go. He’d even started to look forward to it once he’d agreed. Despite what he’d said to people in the past, he was not a bad player, and he prided himself on having a good poker face.
“Everyone got drinks?” Dryden said, picking up her glass of scotch and soda. “Let’s start, then.” There were eight of them, including the captain, who usually hosted the games. “Sit where you like,” she said with a wave of the hand.
Raine didn’t pay too much attention to where he sat—a mistake, as it turned out. He looked to his left to find Jon Parker beside him, wearing a most unfriendly look. Parker didn’t speak to Raine as they settled in, sorting out the chips. Raine didn’t mind; he had Jalota, the navigation officer, at his right side, and she was friendly enough.