by Unknown
Tommy tried to cover his snort with a cough while I bit my lip and shut my eyes.
My mother smacked her hand down onto the wooden counter top and howled, “Cynde!”
“What?”
She was genuinely stumped.
Too bad we all weren’t.
“Did you have to make it sound so dirty?”
“Oh, Vicki! They’re grown adults. What they do is their business.”
“Yes, but I don’t need to hear about it.”
“Please – if Taylor hadn’t been hiding this whole time, you would have wanted full blown details.”
“I most certainly would not.”
Tommy cleared his throat in an attempt to get the conversation back on track and off of, well, our sexy times business.
After everyone had cleared out, after much shoving, mama insisted she had to whip me up some of my favorite: Zucchini bread. She turned her back and walked over to check the stove next to Tommy when Cynde pulled a flask out of thin air and spiked my apple cider.
“Bless you.” I whispered.
Bless her. She always played devil’s advocate when we needed it most.
Cynde was the risk-taker, dare-devil, partner in crime and then some all wrapped into a sweet, wholesome, perfect, southern wife wrapper. She never fit into the mold and I loved her all the more for it. A wink and the flask disappeared when mama turned back around. Tommy shook his head with a smile playing at the corners of his lips, knowingly.
I just shrugged my shoulders and took a big gulp.
Oh, the delicious burn!
My best guess was that famous moonshine Buster made in his back shack on the outskirts of town. He was our very own Uncle Jessie in a way – no sheriff was able to bust his operation yet and he’d been running it for well over fifty years. Praise him. It was damn good ‘shine.
“Don’t put it away, now.” Mama said and tapped the rim of her own mug, eyeing Cynde.
Her best friend to the core just smiled and added a dollop to mama’s cider.
I chuckled and raised my cup to mama in toast.
“After the last six years of trying to get you two together, I need alcohol to deal with whatever is going on.”
“Technically you’ve been trying for a hell of a lot longer than six years.” I pointed out.
“Don’t push me sweet girl. These last few years have been especially hard. You’re stubborn as a mule and we nearly thought Thomas wasn’t interested in women the way he drug his feet getting to you.”
Cynde hummed her agreement, I choked on my drink and Tommy stood tall with a disgruntled cluster of arguments.
Oh mama, if you only knew. The man doesn’t have a gay bone in his body. But lord does he have some nice bones.
This time, Tommy really coughed and it was Cynde’s turn to choke.
“I just said that out loud, didn’t I?” My cheeks reddened.
Tommy nodded his head and made busy around the kitchen.
“And just what happened to waiting for marriage?”
“Don’t act like you never did anything wild and crazy as a young woman, Vicki.” Cynde chided.
“I waited for marriage to do…that.” My mother smoothed her hair and cleared her throat. The utter heartbreak in her eyes, the pure sorrow, at the mere mention of a union between Tommy and me – it slayed her.
It hit me like a train.
In all of this time away, I had robbed my mother of that opportunity to see me grow into a woman and bond over that growth. She hardly knew anything about my new life aside from the little I divulged when she visited. It had to have been hard on her. Especially being the only daughter in two large families. To them, I was both their daughter. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It only took about five seconds for me to gather the faux courage and make up my mind about what to do. This was going to hurt everyone, but false hope was better than no hope. Or was it really false?
“Do yall still have the binder?” It was a question for either of them and they both took no time in answering.
“Of course.”
“Absolutely.”
Tommy stopped and eyed me curiously.
“Well, maybe yall can start going through it.”
“Start going through what, exactly?” He asked curiously. Tommy was fishing with a net out like that. In the back of my mind, I said a hasty pray that for now at least Tommy didn’t catch anything. I knew he would stick a big stick of “No” dynamite in my idiotic plans.
Cynde ran into the living room and squealed pretty much the whole way. Returning, she had a very thick binder in both hands with many scraps of various samples hanging out.
“Son, mind you not. Just be there when we say.”
I’d take that.
“Be where?”
“You’re the perfect man, Thomas.” My mother said, slipping back into her sweet demeanor, all while giving him the brush off.
I stood, kissed both of our mother’s on the cheeks before walking to Tommy. Taking charge, I grabbed Tommy’s hand and pulled him out the back door to my waiting truck.
“Please tell me what is going on.”
“We are going home to finish what you started.”
“I see what you’re doing here and it’s not going to work.” Hermione much?
“Are you sure about that?” I gave him my very best, sex-me-eyes.
The result was what I would consider a preferred reaction. He tugged my arm, pulling me into him and effortlessly managed to haul me up his body, wrapping my legs around his waist. Hands resting on my bottom for support and, I’m pretty sure, to cop a feel.
He continued walking like this, down the porch steps and to my truck with absolutely no strain. It was like he just picked up a piece of paper and carried on with his day. A girl could get used to this.
“What aren’t you telling me?”
Maybe it wasn’t most preferred reaction.
“Um… well, I mean – nothing big. I just…” I looked away as if that would help disguise the words any better. “Itoldthemtoplanourweddingnobigdeal.”
Tommy pretty much made the sound of coming to a screeching halt as he did just that.
“Uh, what?”
“How does Chinese sound? I could really go for some steaming hot chicken fried rice and beef and broccoli. That would just hit the spot, don’t you think? Is Mr. Kim’s still open?” I rambled on as I tried to escape his hulk hold. While trying to throw him off my tracks, I effectively sidelined myself while I giggled to myself about the mystery that was the Chinese place named Mr. Kim’s, because the owner was Korean and his name was Mr. Hyun.
“Wedding.” He said. It wasn’t a question, but I had no doubt that he was asking.
My bottom lip automatically found itself caught up in my teeth. It wasn’t like I was reaching out of the deep blue yonder of girly dreams and forcing him into holy matrimony. We were already there, minus the holy probably.
This man squeezing the life out of me, or at least my ass, was always surprising me.
He reached one hand up and firmly placed it at the nape of my neck, pulling my lips to his where he brushed over mine lightly.
“I didn’t really see a way out of all of that.”
Tommy pulled back minutely and said, “You always ruin it when you open your mouth.”
Well, that wasn’t very nice. And the woman should be saying that to the man.
“Hey.” I smacked his stupid, steel like shoulder and pouted.
“You know that doesn’t work with me.”
“How about a good kick to the balls?” I quipped.
“You’re only going to break their hearts, Taylor.”
He was right. As always. Damn him.
“You in a hurry to get rid of me? Because you sure are quick to remind me that I didn’t plan on staying.”
“No I’m not. And didn’t?” He asked. “That’s past tense.”
“As thrilled as it makes me that I’ve turned you into a grammar nazi and all…”
“Do what?” I didn’t expect him to pick up movement yet so it made me a little breathless when he did.
“Don’t shut me out like that and pretend like I don’t know you at all.”
“Maybe you don’t.”
We both knew I was lying through my teeth and not very well at all. He knew me, but something in my heart was beginning to yearn for home, like it had yearned for adventure when we were teenagers. That could be dangerous. As if life wasn’t dangerous enough right now. Plus, add the fact that he just mauled me in the very near vicinity of our mothers, and we were basically walking on the fire, no longer dancing around it. Tommy opened the passenger door, set me on the bench seat like I was made of glass.
“Tom…” I started but he slammed the door on me.
He took his sweet time walking around the hood of my truck and I’d be a full blown Pinocchio if I said he didn’t look like sex on a stick while he did it.
Tommy opened the driver door but stopped and cranked his head to the south, ears perked up like a hunting dog.
“What is it, boy?” slipped out of my mouth. I really had a way about myself.
Either he didn’t find it amusing or he was really focused on something.
Tommy shook it off and climbed into the cab, turning the engine over and pointing us back towards the house. Our house. It was still pretty weird to say. Not that it didn’t feel right – It was just new.
“You didn’t tell them to keep quiet about me.” I said in a lame attempt at anything other than silence. In the famous words of my hero, P!nk, “The silence scares me, ‘cause it screams the truth.”
“When have you ever known a man to give a Kane or Jameson woman any type of order?” He pointed out.
“Good point.” I agreed.
“Plus, they already know. They’re really good with helping out whenever they can where the clients are involved but considering who it is this time, I think it’s safe to say their lips are sealed. As for Mrs. Can’t-keep-my-mouth-shut-or-camera-to-myself, I am still figuring the best way to dispose of her body.”
“Well, it’ll have to be quick from death to drop because a lot of people will notice her radio silence if she hasn’t tweeted, text, pinned, instagramed or facebooked after five minutes. Ten tops.”
“True.”
“I always liked the Alaskan river theory, but that’s kind of out of the question here.”
“Alaskan river theory?” He asked, eyebrows hitched.
“Yeah. If you want to dump a body in Alaska, do it in any decent sized river just as winter picks up, right before the rivers freeze over. It’ll take forever to find the body and it’ll wipe a good deal of evidence away.” I said matter-of-factly.
He just stared at me.
“Or so they say.” I shrugged my shoulders. It was a non-committal type of shrug and he laughed at me.
“I guess if you want to get away with murder, having a mystery writer on hand doesn’t hurt.”
“You could always leave her in a barrel of paint thinner, too. But that’s just punishment to whoever finds her and or has to clean her out. The smell is horrendous.”
“So they say?”
“Exactly. Plus, I’m sure you could teach me a few things. What with being all special, elite, black ops and stuff.”
That unfamiliar emotion returned behind his eyes and it made me want to run my hand through his hair and kiss it all away. So I tried.
When my hand slid between his dirty blonde tufts, he leaned his head into my hand and let out the heavy sigh he had been holding in.
“Do you mean it?”
I knew exactly what he meant and right now, yeah, I meant it. Going back to New York meant starting over again. Yeah, I had the apartment and the job and Matt but I wouldn’t have Tommy or my family or familiarity and I had no idea where things stood with Jamie right now. She was another piece to my puzzle and it hurt me so intensely to know that she could have been involved in all of this.
I just let out my own sigh and went to drop my hand when he caught it and held it to his lips.
My eyes closed before the tears spilt out of them.
“Later.” That one word from his lips was so encompassing of all things Taylor related. It was practically my motto because I wasn’t very confrontational and he always saved me from having to be. Confrontation didn’t bother me, I just preferred to avoid it. One day here soon I was going to have to face up to everything I did and or didn’t do and try to put everything right. I was going to have to get confrontational with my demons and it wasn’t going to be pretty.
So if right now was me being selfish, then so be it but I wanted to cherish whatever it was we still were to each other.
Sometimes, being an adult blew.
“How well do you know Matt?”
The question took me by surprise as we pulled up in front of the house. I turned to look him in the eyes and tried to figure his angle. His question made me wonder if he were reliving his own confrontation with Matt this morning. I’ll bite on this one.
“Almost as well I know you.”
My answer simply made him shake his head. “That’s what I was afraid of.”
“Just what does that mean?” I huffed in annoyance.
Tommy pulled the keys out of the ignition and shifted away from me instead of to face me.
“A lot has happened since you left. I’m not the same gangly, awkward teenager you left behind.”
“Tommy you were never gangly or awkward. I’m pretty sure you were never a teenager either because you went from cute kid to male God. But I digress. A lot of shit may have happened to you, but I know you better than I know myself and the same goes for you about me.”
He shook his head but didn’t argue the point. I climbed out of the truck not waiting for him to open my door and headed out to under the willow. It was like its own world beneath it and I needed an escape.
“Matt is a good man and he has done right by you in the absence of your family, of me, but there are…” he paused, searching for the right words, “dark shadows lurking in his past, ready to strike given the opportunity. I need you safe and careful isn’t exactly your strong suit.”
“Eat me.” Was pretty much all I had, but that wasn’t going to stop me from arguing now.
“Matt is a good man and he held me up when I had no one.”
“You left, Taylor. No one forced you.”
Talk about a slap in the face. The truth hurt.
“No one asked me to stay, either.”
I could play this game if I had to.
Tommy reached for my hand and in a moment of stupid, I let him. There never was much sense in my body to keep me pulling away from him.
“Safe.” He repeated. There was a vehemence in his voice that meant business.
We locked eyes in a silent battle of the wills which really sucked because my contacts started to dry out about thirty seconds in. Stupid eyes. Tommy opened his mouth to say something when Matt opened the front door and spotted us.
“How goes it?” Matt asked somewhat cheerfully.
There was only one reason for that smile and I had learned it real good the past couple of years.
“Please say you did it at her place.” I griped.
“I’m not stupid enough to bring anyone back here, Taylor.” He kissed my temple and took a step back, checking out the showdown.
I had to blink, I couldn’t take it. My contacts were almost shards of pointy glass on my eyeball.
“What are you two on about?” Noah called.
He had pulled up behind my truck and Candace was with him, climbing out of the SUV.
“Are we having a party I didn’t know about?” Tommy asked in return.
“Not that I know of. And you know I’d know.” Noah said.
“Matt had sex!” I sort of blurted out.
“Jesus Tay, you didn’t need to announce it.” Matt tried his hardest to sound annoyed but he was too high
on sex feel goods to really care. I could see him beaming like headlights in my peripheral vision.
“Well good for Matt. What are you doing here?” Tommy said, turning to Noah.
“Ha! I win, you looked away.” I shouted, probably a little too loudly at him.
Noah laughed because he knew damn well what we were just doing. It wasn’t the first and probably would not be the last time. Age didn’t make a difference.
“What, I can’t just come hang out with my baby brother and …Taylor?” He said, grinning like the Cheshire cat.
“No.” Tommy answered. And just like that it was back to the hard ass, no nonsense way he had become in the years apart.
“Stop it, Thomas.” I chided.
He eyed me and looked back to his brother.
“This about the case?”
“Nope, just wanted to hang with my favorite Jameson.”
Tommy made a noise but no one else seemed to think anything of it. We both knew he meant me.
“Can we please get inside now?” Matt suggested, suddenly looking weary, glancing around as Tommy had, frequently, earlier. Taking into consideration how calm, cool and collected he normally was - if that didn’t make my skin crawl, I didn’t know what would.
Noah sauntered over to me and picked me up playfully around the waist and turned to carry me into the house while I giggled like a loon. Tommy was not having it.
“Put her down.” He commanded, standing in Noah’s path.
“Oh, stuff it tight ass.” Noah snorted and made to move around his brother.
“Now.” Tommy enclosed his hand around his brothers’ bicep and gave a little tug.
“Listen block head…” He began, stepping closer to Tommy and in turn, pushing my back up against Tommy’s front. Not that I minded too much physically, but I knew what was going to happen and after 18 years of it, no matter how long the break, I wasn’t exactly excited to jump back into the mix of fighting brothers. Noah had always known how to goad Tommy into a fight where I was concerned.
“Stop!” I shook my head at both of them, because seriously, this was ridiculous. “Alpha Neanderthals the both of yall.” Struggling between two deliciously tight, puffed out chests, I wiggled my way out of Noah’s arms. Each of them were gifted with a punch before I turned on my heel and stomped up to the house. Talking angrily to myself, all the way I felt Tommy on my back.