by Ava Hardy
“We can’t stop them.” Chris ran his hand over his beard, trying to think of what could be done about it.
“I’ll go ask them to give us some privacy,” Blake offered. Before we could answer him, he took off towards the small group. It was his turn to speak softly, but I picked up a few words about training and privacy. I smiled to myself, thankful that he didn’t mention anything about my nerves or lack of control when it came to my energy. There was a real chance I could hurt someone.
“Don’t stress.” Chris smiled. “Breathe.”
I took a deep breath and smiled at him, hearing Blake jog back towards us.
“That’s my girl,” Chris whispered before giving me a soft kiss. His hands dropped off my arms and he turned to walk towards the end of the field. I could see a stack of various things. A ball, some short 2 x 4s, something that looked like a rock.
Blake stopped once he got beside me and kissed my temple. “They are going to leave us alone, but I’m sure a few will be watching from the nearby windows. Don’t worry about sucking cause they all think you’re wonderful.”
I smacked him in the stomach. “You’re not helping my nerves,” I laughed, turning my attention from Chris to look at Blake’s eyes. He smiled back at me and we both leaned in to share a kiss.
Some might find it weird, this dynamic that I found myself in with both men. At first, the idea of sharing a romantic relationship with more than one person seemed extremely foreign, but then again, I didn’t really have much experience in the love department. I went by society’s rules. But living by Gaia’s rules and the laws of nature, following my destiny, I finally felt like I was right where I needed to be.
“Ready?” Chris shouted from where he was.
“Ready!” I put my feet shoulder width apart and tried to mentally prepare myself the best that I could. I knew I had to focus, but besides that, I felt a bit clueless.
Chris took one of the balls and rolled it down the field towards me. I put my hand up, tried to aim at the moving object and nothing happened. I started to get a little frustrated and the ball slowed to a stop. Nothing happened.
“I don’t know why I can’t do it!” I groaned and felt Blake’s hand rubbing my back.
We started to walk closer to the ball and Chris jogged over to join us. I stared down at the ball, mentally cursing the thing for not exploding or doing something under my command. Crossing my arms, I looked back up at Chris and Blake.
“Don’t give up.” Chris smiled gently. Sometimes I wanted to smack his optimism away.
“There’s no way I can do this.” I was complaining, sure, but I had no idea what I was doing. Controlling this energy seemed like something that I should have been working with as soon as I found out I had it. Years of practice and maybe I’d be able to unleash it without a second thought. How was I supposed to help defeat a Dark Defender and get the element when I couldn’t do more than shoot white light out of my fingers randomly?
Chris and Blake spent a long time trying to figure out how they could help me. No matter how frustrated I got, they stayed calm and reassured me that everything was going to work out. Even when I wanted to give up, I appreciated their ability to change my tune. If they wouldn’t give up on me, neither was I. There was a sprinkle of rain here and there, snowflakes fell, but we stayed there in the field and worked on trying to get it so all I had to do was lift my hand and think of what I wanted to hit. Ideally, the energy would flow from my fingers and reach its target. That was the perfect scenario, and it was so far out of reach at this point.
“What happened when you lit the fire?” Blake asked for the hundredth time.
I sighed and crossed my arms over my chest. “I just wanted it to happen, and it did.”
“And when you did it with the Defenders?”
“I didn’t want either of you to get hurt or be killed,” I explained. I had given these same answers a dozen times and nothing changed. There was no point in repeating myself, and yet I continued to. Maybe it helped them to process things better.
“An emotional response,” Chris stated softly. “It’s why you were able to warm us with your kiss. You have healing powers, more so than shifters. The ability to heal plus the energy that you possess was able to thaw us. When you thought we would be killed by the Defenders, you reacted. The fire, I think you wanted it bad enough that it happened.”
It made sense. I was fired up with emotions each time it happened. Emotionally charged, if you will. I needed to figure out how to bring up those emotions without forcing myself to be in a life or death situation.
Deciding that I was going to give it a try, I stepped back and looked at the ball that hadn’t been moved all day. I brought up the image of both of them on the ground, a blue tint covering every inch of them. The way it felt to lose them even for just a second. The empty hole that needed to be filled. I promised to do anything possible to save the both of them, and that was a promise I intended to keep.
I felt a surge of emotions wash over me, drowning out everything around me. I wasn’t going to lose them. Lifting my hand, I concentrated on the ball and the flash of light was instant. It traveled from my fingertips and hit the ball within a second. There were pieces of rubber flying into the air and I let out the breath I was holding. Two sets of arms were around me; excited voices spoke but I couldn’t focus on what they were saying. There was a dull ringing in my ears that made everything muffled. Thump. Thump. Thump. All I could hear was my heartbeat.
The fog that had settled over me disappeared nearly as fast as it had appeared. I smiled and looked at the happy faces of both Blake and Chris. I did it!
Now that I knew how to pull up emotions that would help, training with the guys went a little better. It was rocky at first. I struggled at keeping the emotions at the front and using them to control my energy. We kept at it though. The guys were so positive that I kept asking to go again. I wanted this to be perfect, if not for me, then for them.
It started to get close to dusk, and we had used up all the supplies that the villagers had donated. A small crowd had returned to the edge of the field and watched in wonder as I continued to destroy things in the air, on the ground and wherever Blake or Chris put them. My aim was getting better. My control was near perfect. I was getting confident. I might actually be able to do this.
Time slipped by and I was squinting in the dim light that was left from the sun to see whatever it was that Chris held. He wanted me to try and destroy it while he held it against his chest. It made me nervous. I could barely see and one inch too much on either side, and Chris would...I didn’t want to think about it.
“I can’t,” I told him, shaking my head as I dropped my arm. “There is no way I’m going to chance it.”
“I trust you. All you have to do is focus,” Chris said, his buttery smooth voice hitting me directly.
He stood nearly at the other side of the field, his outline pretty much the only thing visible. While I understood the need to practice in less than perfect conditions, I didn’t want to do it like this. If something happened to Chris, I would never be able to forgive myself.
“You can do it,” he said encouragingly.
I glanced at Blake and all he did was give me a little smile. He wasn’t going to convince me one way or the other. This was my decision. Taking a deep breath, I looked back towards where Chris stood. I focused, my eyes squinting again. Raising my hand, I kept my eyes on my target and then pulled up all the emotions that I needed to send a bolt of white light across the field. A loud snap ricocheted across the field and Chris was thrown onto his back. I was in a sprint alongside Blake before the sound filtered away.
“Chris!” I called out his name but there was no response. He didn’t even move.
Fear pushed me to run faster. Blake was right there beside me and we both fell to our knees when we got to where our friend was laying. I put my hand on his cheek while Blake checked to see if he was injured anywhere. His heart was beating and he seemed to be bre
athing normal. I glanced up to look at Blake, silently asking what we were going to do. Just as he was about to speak, Chris started to move his head and let out a little cough.
Relief was an understatement as I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him in close. “You scared the shit out of me,” I whispered against his ear as he hugged me back.
“The impact landed me on my ass.” He chuckled, rubbing my back. “At least we know what happens now and we know that you can do things at dusk. I bet you’d have no problem if it was dark; your eyes would adjust. It’s just tricky when the light is neither here nor there.”
“Stop talking,” I told him softly, wanting to spend a moment just holding him and being thankful that he wasn’t injured.
Blake chuckled, obviously glad to see that Chris was okay. “You’re not allowed to be on the receiving end anymore,” he told his friend with a smirk and I nodded in agreement.
Chris didn’t argue as he moved to stand up, keeping his arms around me. I wasn’t letting go, and he realized that as we started to walk back across the field. We were done for the day. Tired, cold, and hungry. Nothing sounded better than relaxing by the fire with some good food with my two favorite people.
Offering to cook up the last few steaks that we had, Blake got busy in the kitchen while Chris and I sat down on the couch. The fire was going and helped with the stove to warm up the house. It felt very homey. The scent when we walked in was now ours and no longer the musky scent of the previous tenants and from the doors and windows being closed for too long. I started to picture what it would be like if we lived here full-time. Not here specifically, but in a house together. Home would be wherever they were, but I wondered if they would ever consider it. With Blake living in Canada and Chris down in Oregon, we were in the same region but not even close to being able to visit unless on weekends. I started to frown at the idea, hoping that we didn’t lose touch with one another after this.
“Hey...what’s wrong?” Chris asked softly, jarring me out of my thoughts.
I shook my head and plastered a smile on my face as I looked at him. “It’s nothing. I was just thinking. How are you feeling?”
“I think I’ll have a few bruises but that isn’t much. If it’s too bad, I’ll shift and be right as rain,” Chris answered. I reached out and ran my fingers through his hair, loving the feel of the soft strands sliding through my grasp.
“That doesn’t tell me how you’re feeling,” I pointed out softly, causing him to look me in the eye.
For a moment, he hesitated. I don’t think he wanted to tell me what was on his mind. It looked like he was going to take a few steps back mentally, and it was hard to watch. His mouth opened and I froze for a second, not wanting to miss a word he said. Then nothing came out and I frowned.
“I can’t figure out why we haven’t found the element yet,” Chris confessed. His voice was soft, his eyes glancing towards Blake to see if the man was paying attention.
“Well, it took you guys how long to find me?” I tried to reason, and Chris whipped his head back around to stare at me. “You can’t expect to find it right away.”
“We’ve been searching. Everyone has been searching. There are packs all over the world that are helping collectors find the right path that will take them to the elements. It doesn’t make sense that we’re not able to do it.”
Chris was frustrated, and I could understand why. His entire adult life led to this moment and nothing was happening according to plan. I thought about pointing out the fact that this wasn’t something that could be studied out of a textbook. He couldn’t roll out a map and there be a giant X where the element was. It would be nice, but it was not going to happen. No treasure map this time.
“I don’t want to fail.” He sighed, glancing at his hands on his lap. I ran my fingers through his hair, trying to comfort him again. I asked what he meant by him failing. This was a team effort. “For each element, there is a lead. He’s the Gifted that is closest to the element and it’s an easy way to figure out if someone is part of your team or to see who’s missing.” I wasn’t following him but attempting to. It was clear by the look on my face that Chris was starting to lose me.
“Blake, he’s water. He can manipulate it to some degree and harness its energy similar to the energy that you have. It comes in handy when he’s fighting fires. He can increase the output of the hose or with the sprinklers and nobody can tell. The funny thing is, the man hates the water,” Chris chuckled.
“It’s true,” Blake confirmed from the kitchen, moving about as he got their dinner ready.
I smiled as I glanced to Blake and then looked back at Chris. “So what are you?”
“Earth,” he answered. “When we put the rocks in the dirt, I was able to make it hold heat so that it would keep your core warm, when usually the ground would suck every last ounce of heat from you. But if you think about earth and water as elements, together they are cold. It’s why we’re here, pretty much as far north as we can possibly get. All the signs pointed us here and yet we can’t find the actual element. So Blake is the lead and that makes me...not really second in command, but it is my job to do the legwork. That’s why I’ve been doing a lot of research, talking to people and gathering the data. It’s not just because I like it, but because it needs to be done. It allows Blake to rest, mentally prepare for the battle.”
I listened as Chris explained everything to me and it started to make sense. My fingers ran through his hair again and I paused for a moment. “Who tells you who’s the lead...the one who has to battle?”
“Nobody tells you. You figure it out based on the elements and the location,” Chris answered, his eyes closing as his head went to the back of the couch. He was falling in love with the feeling of my fingers in his hair just as much as I was enjoying it.
“So it’s possible this is really your battle and it could be why we haven’t found the element?”
Chris didn’t move, and I noticed that Blake was frozen in the kitchen. The water in a pot started to boil over and neither moved nor said anything. I started to wonder if I said something wrong. Chris finally turned his head to look at the other man just as Blake did the same. Their wide eyes told me that we may have just figured out why we were having so much trouble finding the element.
Chapter 14
I didn’t have to open my eyes the next morning to know that Blake wasn’t in bed with us. Where he usually cuddled up behind me was cold, and seemed to have been for some time. I stretched out and figured that he had gone for his usual morning run. Surprisingly, Chris was still there and watching me with curious eyes.
“He got up early to start gathering more information,” Chris explained as if he could read my mind.
“You sure he didn’t go for a run?” I asked with a bit of a yawn. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and moved to sit up. With no idea what time it was, I hoped that I had managed to sleep in a little. The boys seemed to like letting me do so.
Chris shook his head against the pillow and smiled at me. “I talked to him before he left.”
“Left? Where did he go?” I pulled my knees up to rest my folded arms on them and turned my head to look at Chris still lying beside me. Images of Blake leaving for good flashed in my mind, scared me, but I knew there was no reason why he would just vanish on us like that. He was as much a part of the team as anyone. No, his duty to finding the element wouldn’t allow him to leave. Yet my mind was still worried that maybe he decided he couldn’t do this. I knew I was having similar thoughts.
“Now that we believe I’m the lead, he is picking up where I left off. He wanted to meet with some packs that live further out and see what they have to say. It shouldn’t take him more than a few hours to travel out and back,” Chris told me softly, his hand moving to rub my back. “He’s just as determined as I am to find the element so we can go home.”
Resting my chin on my arms, I nodded my head a little and stared at the open door to the bedroom. Home. I didn’t know if that mea
nt the log cabin set back deep in the woods for Chris and the small-town bungalow for Blake. I’d be left to return to my small apartment in Seattle and then what? Go back to working for Roger? No thanks. I already sent in that resignation. I’d have to find something else to do with my days that would pay the bills.
“What’s on your mind?” Chris’s voice was softer than it was a minute ago, smoother too. I think he was starting to pick up on the fact that when he spoke like that and melted butter, he could melt me as well.
I shrugged my shoulders and continued to stare at the door. The hesitations I felt were probably just nerves. They’d go away as soon as I had them both back under the same roof. ’Til then, I’d worry about Blake. I’d worry about my ability to fight. I’d worry about the aftermath for both the world in general and my personal one. Could I go back to Seattle alone? Did I want to? Gaia’s idea of a collector staying with her Gifted was starting to sound like a dream but could we make it a reality?
Chris sat up and moved to press against my back a little. He rested his chin on my shoulder and then kissed my neck softly. “Talk to me,” he pleaded softly.