Rhodes stood beside the bed looking down at his mother. His eyes brimmed with tears. He tried to slap them away, but they filled again, spilled down his cheek. His throat tightened, and he swallowed back a sob.
Rosanne stood up and drew his head down on her shoulder. For the first time he realized he was as tall as Rosanne. He tried to pull away from her. Her arms tightened and her soft hands soothed his hair.
• • •
“Rhodes.”
It was six o’clock that night. Rhodes was startled to hear his mother speak.
“Yes.” He jumped up from his chair, bent close over her bed.
“Where is Will? I haven’t seen Will in two days.”
Rhodes tried to smile. “It hasn’t been two days, Mamma. It seems like it — you’ve been sleeping so much.”
“The doctor was here.”
“Yes.”
“I was sick and the doctor was here.”
“He’s coming back, Mamma. He’s coming back tonight.”
Lena turned her head away. After a moment she looked back at Rhodes. “That — woman is here on the place again.”
“Rosanne?”
“That woman. I don’t want her here.”
“Mamma. She’s working hard. She’s trying to help you.”
“I don’t want her to help me. I want her out of here. Why is she here?”
“She wants to help you.”
“Why doesn’t she go back to Alabama?”
“I don’t know, Mamma. I guess she will.”
“Yes. She will. You send Will to me. I want to tell him. That woman — off the place — I want her to go back to Alabama. You send Will to me, Rhodes.”
“He’s not here, Mamma.”
“He’s not here? Where is he? I’m ill, and he’s chasing after that woman. Where are they? Where did they go-together?”
“No, Mamma. Stop. You’re getting all upset. Rosanne is fixing supper. Will is — he’s in town, Mamma. He’ll come to you, as soon as he gets home.”
Lena subsided then, closing her eyes, turning her face away.
Rhodes sat there watching the midwinter night darken beyond the closed window, hearing the way the wind was rising, cold and sharp about the eaves of the old house. He listened, for the sound of cars — of Will’s coming home, of the doctor’s return … or Darl Hollister’s arrival. He sat there without taking a full breath.
Almost an hour passed. Lena said, “Rhodes.”
He leaned over her again. “I’m here, Mama.”
“Yes. You’re here. You’re here with me. You’re all I’ve got. Chris is gone, and you’re all I’ve got.” Suddenly she screamed out, wailing.
Rhodes caught her shoulders, pressing her back in the bed.
The bedroom door flew open and Grandpa ran into the room.
“I best get Rosanne up here,” Grandpa said. “Lena needs another one of them pain pills.”
Lena writhed, twisting on the bed. “It ain’t pain, Papa. It ain’t pills I need. We’re disgraced. That’s my pain. That’s the pain I can’t stand.”
“It ain’t true, girl. Don’t talk like that.”
“It’s true. Oh, you won’t see it. You don’t want to see it. But I know. I know. I lie here in this bed … I lie here dying and I know more than all the rest of you — because I see what you don’t want to see.”
“Mamma,” Rhodes whispered. “Stop. Don’t talk like this. The doctor will be here soon.”
Lena’s face got wild. “Yes. The doctor will be here soon. But Will won’t be here. Will’s gone — hasn’t he? Will’s run away with that slut — ”
“Lena. Stop it. If you mean Rosanne, she’s down in the kitchen. I’ll call her for you.”
“Don’t!” Lena gasped it out. Her face was taut and her eyes were distended. “I don’t want her in this room. Oh, I know about her. And all about it. Rhodes, boy, are you here?”
“I’m here.”
“Rhodes, I want you to go into town. I want you to go to Sheriff McCall. I want you to bring him out here to me. Now. Right now, son. If he’s not at his office. You go to his house. You tell him your mother wants him. You tell him he better come now. Right now.”
“Mamma, please.”
Lena began to sob. “Will you do it, Rhodes? Will you do what I tell you? Or must I get up from this bed? Do what I tell you.”
Rhodes stared at Grandpa. The old man looked at his daughter for a long time, then he turned his head toward Rhodes.
“You best do it, boy. You best humor her. Better to do what she says than have her waste all her strength a-carrying on like this.”
Lena exhaled a long sigh and sank back against the pillows. She stared up at them, her eyes lighted deep in their sockets, showing malice and satisfaction and a terrible kind of triumph.
Sheriff McCall took off his big Stetson when he came through the bedroom door. He stood beside Lena’s bed, looking awkward and uncomfortable. He looked down at her and tried to smile.
“Howdy, Mrs. Johnson. Your boy tells me you want to see me urgent. What’s got you so upset?”
Lena stared up at him, picking at the coverlet with her bony fingers. “The same thing that would have you upset, Sheriff, if you knew the truth like I do.”
“The truth, Ma’am, about what?”
“Sit down, Sheriff. In that chair. Pull it beside the bed. I haven’t a lot of strength any more, Sheriff. It’s a wonder to God I have any strength at all the terrible things I have to go through.”
“Yes, ma’am, now just why did you call me?”
“It’s not easy to say the things I’ve got to say, Sheriff. I want you to know that. I’ve — been through hell in my mind — but I knew I had to tell you.”
“Yes ma’am.” The sheriff leaned forward slightly. “Now what is it you wanted to tell me?”
“It’s about my husband — about Will Johnson — and that woman downstairs — that woman he brought here on the place.”
Sheriff McCall frowned. “You mean Tom Wilkes’ widow, ma’m?”
“Certainly Tom Wilkes’ widow. Who else? That no good. Strutting and twitching around here from the first moment she came. It’s their fault. It’s their fault that my poor dear cousin Tom lies dead right now.”
Sheriff McCall scowled, looking from Grandpa to Rhodes. Rhodes was holding his breath, but Grandpa had an odd smile on his mouth, and he was staring at Lena.
“Their fault, ma’m?”
“That’s right. I’m going to tell you the truth about the way Tom Wilkes died, Sheriff. You believe that Tom was robbing Will, don’t you?”
“I know he’d been doing some thieving, ma’m. I know he had three calves in his truck that seemed to belong to Will.”
“To Will? To Will Johnson? He had nothing. He has nothing — nothing but what he tries to take from me and my poor unprotected boy. Those calves were mine. They were mine, Sheriff. I gave them to Tom Wilkes.”
For a long time it was silent in the room. The rising wind tickled at the house with a chinaberry branch.
“You — gave them to your Cousin Tom?”
“Of course I did. He was a Wilkes. My flesh and blood. Why wouldn’t I give them to him if he needed them to get started in a place of his own?”
“Did — Did Will Johnson know this, ma’m?”
“Of course he knew it. I told him. But he wouldn’t have it that way. He knew that Tom was not robbing us. How could Tom rob us — his own family?”
“Way I looked at it, ma’m, I figured Tom just wasn’t too particular who he robbed — own family didn’t make no difference.”
“Well — that’s not true. Tom was a Wilkes. And we’re not thieves — and liars and — murderers.”
“Ma’m … do you know what you’re saying?”
Lena burst out laughing. “Are you suggesting I’m lying now?”
“No, ma’am, it’s just that nothing I learned gives any credence to your story. Why would Will kill your cousin?”
“Why? It
’s plain enough. That woman downstairs. That’s why. Will Johnson is in love with her. He has been. I’m ill, ugly. He can’t stand me. But a pretty little slut comes along — and he looks for an excuse to kill her husband. Will wanted any excuse to kill Tom — and to act like it was a robbery. That was just what Will Johnson had been looking for.”
“But — they fought and argued — there in the corral, ma’m.”
“Yes. Why? Because Tom was trying to bring Will to his senses, trying to make him see that I had given those cattle to him. Will didn’t listen, because he didn’t want to listen.
“He gave them his house to live in, didn’t he? It’s been closed all these years, but he gave it to Tom and that Rosanne to live in. Why? He wanted to keep that woman near him. That’s why he gave her that house. So he could sneak to see her — so he could wait for a chance like this — to kill poor Tom.”
The doctor walked into the room. He stared at Lena. “Good lord,” he said. “What are you people trying to do, kill this poor woman? Look at her. She hasn’t the strength for anything like this. I’ll have to ask you people to leave this room. Now.”
Rhodes was staring at his mother. Her eyes were lighted as they had been when she sent him for the sheriff. He turned, feeling sick at his stomach.
The sheriff stopped him in the hall. The sheriff looked gray and ill, too. He said, “Boy, where is Will? I’ve got to see him.’’
“He’s not here,” Rhodes said. “I don’t know where he is.”
If I did, he thought, I’d warn him. I’d tell him never to come back.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
WHEN Rhodes came in from watering the stock late Sunday afternoon, Will was there.
The house was silent and somehow Will was the last person Rhodes expected to see. The doctor and Rosanne were upstairs with his mother, and Grandpa was huddled before the front room fire.
He stepped into the kitchen and Will was standing beside the stove with a cup of coffee held in both hands.
Will turned and grinned. He said, “Hello, boy.”
For a moment Rhodes could not speak. It was more than surprise at seeing Will back. Last night he’d slept fitfully, dreaming of his mother’s dying, and Will being killed by government men when he was caught with Swamp Taylor’s bootleg shine.
Perhaps he had decided that Will would never come back. But it was not just his being here that made Rhodes speechless. It was the way Will looked.
He looked as if he’d been dragged feet first through hell.
His beard was two days old, rough and matted. His hair stood wild on his head. His clothes looked as if they’d been soaked and were still damp. They were streaked and caked with mud, and mud was covering his shoes and trousers.
His smile was weak and tired. He stood there letting the steam from the hot coffee warm his face. His whole body shivered.
“Will,” Rhodes said. “You better get into some warm clothes.”
Will nodded. “Yes, boy. All right. I’ll go in the downstairs bathroom. You bring me something to wear. I’ll get a hot bath and a shave before I see — anybody.”
The bathroom was steaming when Rhodes carried Will’s fresh clothing into it. Will got out of the tub and rubbed vigorously with a rough towel. He started to dress.
“Your Ma get away to Jacksonville all right, boy?”
“She didn’t go.”
“She didn’t go? Why not?”
“She had a bad day — yesterday. I tried to find you. I couldn’t. The doctor said he would wait before he took Ma to Jacksonville. He wanted to talk to you first.”
Will’s face looked haggard. “I’m sorry boy. Looks like no matter what I try to do — I mess up everything.”
“That’s not true, Will. I knew you had to get some money somehow.”
Will laughed and patted Rhodes’ shoulder. “And I got it, boy. Something I said I’d never do, and — ” he shivered, “I pray God I don’t have to go through it again … But by holy God, I got us enough money to get through.”
“You-didn’t get hurt, Will … They didn’t catch you?”
“I’m here, boy. I made the delivery. All the way across the state. In one of Swamp’s trucks. I had some trouble getting back.” He shivered, shook his head. “I’m here … what did Darl Hollister do when he found out that check I gave him wasn’t any good?”
“Nothing, Will. He hasn’t been here. I kept waitin’ for him. But we haven’t heard from him at all.”
Will finished dressing, stroked his fingers along his newly shaven cheeks. “I better go see that doctor. We can still get your Ma over to Jacksonville tonight.”
“He’s up in her room, Will.” Rhodes followed him from the bathroom. They went down the hall. “Will — ” Rhodes wanted to tell him what Lena had said to the sheriff. Will had to be told.
“Later, boy. I better see that doctor and find out why in hell he never took Lena to Jacksonville like he said he was going to do.”
Dr. Beckwell met Will at the head of the stairs.
“Will,” he said. “You picked a hellish time to stay away from home.”
“Never mind me,” Will said. “Why didn’t you take Lena over there to Jacksonville in that ambulance like you said you were going to? Wasn’t my check any good?”
“The check cleared Will. It wasn’t that.”
“Wasn’t it enough money? It was all I had. More than I had.” His laugh was sharp. “You mean even that wasn’t enough.”
“I told you it wasn’t the money, Will.”
Will drew a deep breath. “All right, Doc. What is it?”
“Dr. Beckwell glanced toward Rhodes. Will put his arm about Rhodes’ shoulder and drew him against his side.
“What is it, Doc?”
The doctor breathed heavily. “It’s the worst, Will. There’s no way to soften it. There’s nothing I can do. It — it has gone too far this time. An operation would be futile. Your wife — is going to die. I thought several times that she would die — during the night, all day. You better go in to see her now.”
Rhodes caught back the sob that welled in his throat. It was like an animal cry of pain. Will tightened his hand on Rhodes’ shoulder.
“Come with me, boy,” the doctor said. He put his arm about Rhodes and started down the steps. “Come downstairs with me.”
Rhodes looked back over his shoulder once. Will was standing there, staring at the floor. He had not moved.
• • •
Will closed the door. In the room was the smell of death. Lena lay in the middle of the bed, like a shadow lost in darker shadows. Her hands were at her sides and they were still.
He went slowly across the room to the side of the bed. He stood there, looking down at her. He did not speak.
At last Lena opened her eyes.
“Will.”
Before he could speak, he saw the fright move into her eyes. She tried to withdraw into the bed.
“Will … I know you hate me, Will.”
“No. Why would I hate you?”
“For what I’ve done to you.”
“You haven’t done anything to me, Lena.”
“Yes. Oh, yes, I have. You don’t have to be nice any more, Will. You don’t have to spare me any more. You don’t have to say things you don’t mean.”
“I just want you to get well, Lena.”
“No. I know. I’ve known for a long time now. They never did get it all, Will. The — doctors — they’re not that smart. They tell you — they are. But they know better. It kept growing — no matter what they did. It got ahead of them — it got too far ahead of them. They never kept me alive, Will — you did. Always you did. Because I loved you so much — even when you never loved me at all.”
“Don’t talk.”
“I’ve got to talk. It’s what I’ve waited for. You — were gone so long. Remember when you’d go away, Will, after we’d been married a while? I knew. Then I knew. I wasn’t what you wanted. I — I couldn’t satisfy you. I couldn’t give
you what you wanted. It killed me, Will. It ate me up inside. No matter what I did — I didn’t excite you … you didn’t want me. And you’d go away — and I’d wait for you to come back, and — I hated you — and the hate ate me away inside. It was that, Will — it doesn’t matter what the doctors say. They don’t know why I’m still alive — so how would they know what is really killing me.”
He sank down beside the bed. “I won’t try to lie, Lena. I’ve never been a good man. I — I’ve just done what I could. I — always wanted to be better. It just seemed there was something in me — I was what I was — not matter how hard I tried.”
“You’ve been good, Will. Better to me ever than I was to you. But — it wasn’t enough. You — didn’t want my love — and I — I didn’t want your goodness. If you’d beat me, Will. If you’d done anything — and loved me — I wouldn’t have been so full of hate … and now — now when it’s too late, I want you to forgive me, Will. I want you to know that — I’ve always loved you — even when I hurt you most, it was because I loved you — and you — didn’t love back. So that’s why I did it, Will. You got to know, Will. That’s why I did it.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, yes. You do. About Tom. Why you killed him. I lied to them, but I made them believe my lies…. I had to — I — I’d rather see you in the — chain gang — than with some other woman after all the — hell I lived through.”
Will stood there, looking down at her. She stared up at him. Her stark eyes filled with tears.
“Poor Will,” she whispered. “You — you’ll just never know how terribly I loved you …”
CHAPTER TWENTY
IT WAS a little after nine that night when the doctor came down into the front room.
Will had the account book across his knees, but was not reading it. Grandpa was staring into the open fire and Rhodes was sprawled out on the couch.
They looked up at the doctor when he came into the room, but they did not speak. There was no need for words. They could hear Rosanne moving around upstairs. It was that quiet in the house.
“I’m sorry,” the doctor said.
They stared at him and did not speak. He placed his medical kit on the table, examined it briefly, snapped it shut. He breathed in heavily. “She was in great agony,” he said. He was looking at Rhodes. “She died peacefully.”
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