by L. Ann Marie
Fuck. “I’ll teach her Dakota. Does she have the ability to shield?”
“Not like you. She can attain a level of shielding that will help her stay safe, but I do not believe she will ever be completely safe from touch if it is sustained contact. You have the ability to feel then command. She can learn to command and shield for the initial shock, but taken by surprise—I fear she will always be in danger.”
“Can I shield for her?”
He looks at me surprised. “I do not know my Warrior Protector.”
“When you have a minute to ask, can you? If I can shield her I will.” I look at her thinking I’ll do whatever it takes to keep her safe. My Little Pixie doesn’t need to go through this shit for the rest of her life.
“I will ask. I will stop in later Brother.”
He flies and I watch him thinking there has to be a way around this and I’ll find it. We jump back and Aaron is standing in the open door. He looks at Dean then me. “Dakota couldn’t help?” He’s pissed at himself for touching her.
“He did. She’s going to sleep for a while apparently.”
With a nod, he steps back. “Prez is on his way.”
“Fuckin’ great.”
He laughs and opens the door. We walk into the back and Beth takes us to a room. “What happened to her?”
“Dakota saw her already. She’s sleeping. She was touched by Aaron then two women at the Reader house.”
She nods thinking this is bad if just that touch has her out. I nod and she smiles. “I need to see where the blood is coming from.” I hold Dean away from me and take my shirt off. “You do realize her being in the air like this is freakier than I usually see from you.”
“I’m not letting her go so do what you have to so I can get her home.”
She’s still smiling. “You could put her in the bed.”
I shake my head no. “She needs to feel me.”
She puts gloves on and looks at me. “I’m going to have to touch you.” I nod and brace for it. “She feels you hanging in the air like that?”
“Yeah.”
Nick comes in with Prez. “That’s not something you see every day.”
Aaron laughs and walks to the door. “I’ll be outside.”
“It’s a graze, but deep,” Beth tells Nick.
“Shit. Okay, get the suture kit ready.” He looks at me. “Prez said you took a shot to the back. I need the vest off.”
“It’s fine.”
“Take the fuckin’ vest off and let him see,” Prez says looking at Dean. “I saw you shield her. Why is she still out?”
“Dakota said her body can’t take the energy with no way to release. I could only throw a shield around them. I don’t know how to shield her if someone is touching her. I’m not a healer. He’ll check on her later.” I clench my jaw when I pull the Velcro on the vest. Moving it in front of me, I spin it to see the back. Fuck. I’m fuckin’ lucky I had it on.
His eyes snap to mine. “You saw Dakota? You jumped to him?”
“No, we met at the reservation.”
Nick stands on the side of me looking at my back. “I need to touch for a minute.”
I nod and he pushes on my back making me see stars. “Stop.”
His hand moves away. “It will be sore for a couple of days. Since you walked in here carrying her you don’t have damage to your spinal cord.” He smiles. “No more than the big fuckin’ lump and bruise that is.” I roll my eyes at him. “Your arm needs stitches.”
I shake my head no. “I can’t take much more. Dakota isn’t here and Jeremy is in Mass. Can’t you just cover me?”
“We could try the super glue thing,” Beth says.
I smile. “Do you have to touch me?”
Nick laughs. “Very little. I’m willing to try it and this is a time it would matter.”
Prez moves closer. “Can’t you let her down and get stitched up?”
“No.” I’m not putting her on the table. Right now, she feels my arms around her and she’ll keep feeling me until I can hold her again.
He doesn’t ask any of the questions going through his head. “You need to get her a cut.”
“It’s due tomorrow.”
Beth comes in with super glue and opens the package. She’s excited to try this and I can’t help, but smile. Women are funny. Nick sits on the stool and looks at the line across my upper arm. “I’m touching.” I nod and he opens the cut. “This is fuckin’ deep Christian. Stitches would be better.”
“No,” I breathe out when he moves his hands. “I can’t take more on Nick.”
Prez throws for me to put her down. “No. He can super glue me or just cover the fuckin’ thing. I’m not letting her go.”
“Jesus you’re stubborn. Just super glue him,” Prez says smiling. “I can relate Brother, but she’s out and won’t know that you put her on the bed.”
“I’ll know. She needs me. I’m not letting her go.”
He shakes his head, but he’s still smiling. Nick starts squeezing the super glue on me with tweezer things holding the skin up as he goes. I hold my breath. Fuck, it burns like a bastard.
“Done Brother.”
I breathe. He gets me covered and I pull Dean over to me. “Thanks Nick and Beth.” I stand and feel the pull on my back.
“I’ll check you in the morning. Eight or so.”
I nod and walk out. “Almost home baby,” I tell her getting back in the SUV.
The kids are waiting on my steps with Done and the dogs standing on the side of them. “They said they can help,” Done says hoping I won’t be pissed.
I smile. “I’ll take it.” I carry Dean up the stairs and the kids follow me in. Nekanis runs up the stairs coming back to check where we are. When I put Dean on the bed he jumps up and lays beside her. Since I didn’t give him any commands I find this funny. “You’re a good Brother Nekanis.”
Mucimi climbs on the bed with some help from Brandon. Aquyà, Phoenix, Teller and Justice get up without a problem and sit beside Mucimi. I watch them put their hands on him and think the little Badasses are supporting him. Jacob comes and chants then the boys do. I put my hand on her leg and jump. Hawk is waiting. I tell him all that’s happened and how I just want her to wake up, but I get no advice from him.
Jessie, Prez, Brantley and Taylor come to collect the boys. Jax comes in and says the meeting is set for Saturday. I look and see they’re having a community meeting.
Prez looks at me. “We need their help. Too many readers could have been hurt today.”
I nod, surprised he’s reading me. When they leave, I hold my girl against my chest while Nekanis lays against her back. My dad calls and I go through the day with him. Everyone is checking in and I throw to all of them that she’s sleeping and I’ll let them know when she wakes up. I love every one of them, but—fuck—I need a minute to think.
I order dinner and tell the guard to leave it on the counter then jump with Dean and sit on the rock overlooking the lake. Hawk sits beside me and I settle. I think about the last few weeks. We’ve been everywhere and seen everyone so they can meet her. I smile thinking about Tess. She had Dean talking to her forever. It was cute, the pixie and the fairy, both so happy to meet. I’m so glad the family is letting her do this slow and not showing all at once. My girl isn’t good with crowds and they’re respecting that. I remember reading everyone and not being able to shut their thoughts down. That’s how I ended up on the reservation. I smile remembering Nunánuk words ‘your little one.’ She is too.
I kiss her head and talk to her about the things we’ve done. She had never been on a horse. It was fuckin’ funny. I ended up putting her in front of me and riding to the water. She loves seeing the ocean. She loves everything. Even taking Mucimi and Chance canoeing was a happy day. I expected her to want to bring them home when we were done, but she wanted to go eat and we brought them to the park. I think she loves them as much as I do. Something is pulling me, so I jump back.
When I hear the chopp
er, I groan. Fuckin’ ‘rents. I keep my shields up not even wanting to know. They’re too much sometimes. Nekanis jumps up when they come in. “Friends.” He lays down putting his head on her back. “Good Brother.”
Pres, Uncle Danny, Uncle Steve, my dad and Tiny walk in. Maybe I should have looked. “Why is she still sleeping? Little Ben said Dakota saw her,” Pres asks and I see his concern.
“He said her body can’t handle the energy without a way to release it. Mucimi and the boys were here too. Dakota will check on her when he gets back.” Everything is running through his head and I shield from it.
“Needs a dog,” Uncle Steve says.
That’s not a bad idea. “Yeah. I was thinking I could shield for her, but I don’t know how.” They all just look at me.
“Dog,” he says again. I nod.
Prez comes running up the stairs. “Jesus.”
I look at him and smile. “Yeah. I need to get up and walk.”
“Your back must be killing you. Do you need something for pain?”
“No Prez. I didn’t take the last pills. It’s too much.” I raise her up and slide out. It takes me a minute to stand and move the pillows. When I put her down Tiny laughs. I look to see what’s funny, but they’re all watching me. “Since you’re all here I need to change.” I get shorts and take them to the bathroom.
“You got hit in the back?” Pres asks.
I lift and turn. “Yeah.”
They’re all watching me again and I’m glad I’m shielding. Sometimes I feel like I’m on display. It’s fuckin’ weird. I change and pace the room. They aren’t talking, so I stop and look around at them. “What?”
Everyone looks at Pres so I do. “You’re going to figure out how to shield her?”
I nod. “I need to do something. She can’t go through life like this. Dakota said even if she can command and shield from the initial touch he fears she’ll always be in danger and her body can’t handle the energy. If I can find a way to shield for her I will.”
“Dog releases energy.”
Uncle Danny looks at him and rolls his eye. “He already agreed to the fuckin’ dog.”
“Shield like you did today?” Prez asks.
I pace. It feels good to move. “I don’t know. I was shielding them from bullets. I never thought about another way. If I could read her I’d know and could do something, but I get nothing from her unless she’s excited or scared like today.”
“Why was she scared?” Tiny asks like I did something to her. I roll my eyes and pace.
Prez answers for me. “She saw him get shot. Aaron picked her up and we could see her fighting to get away, but he brought her in the house and was covering Christian. Shots were coming from every-fuckin’-where.”
Pres puts his arm out stopping me. “Why didn’t you see it before it happened?”
“I don’t see me.”
“The other readers do.”
I see where he’s going. “They would bring it to Dakota or Prez. They can’t tell me if it alters something else.”
Everyone looks at Prez. He nods. “He felt something off and called for HS. There was no time or day, just the vision. When I found out he called for a bad feeling I sent Taylor and Tag, but him and Aaron were already clear when they showed.”
Pres’s hands go in his hair. “You need to be covered by a reader.”
“There isn’t one available. We’ve been through this.”
They go back and forth and I get a fork and move my food up. Since they aren’t fuckin’ leaving, I move beer and send one to each then sit on the bed and eat. “Your food is down Nekanis,” I tell him. He jumps down and runs down the stairs. When I’m done, I bag the tray back up and send it to the kitchen trash.
“Do you do anything normal?” Pres asks. I look at him wondering what he’s asking, but I don’t pull the shield.
“To him, it’s normal,” Prez says.
The bag? I move me back to the floor and pace. Shielding while I can’t read her is impossible. Maybe Dakota will have something. They’re still going on about the kids. I just realize my dad hasn’t said a word. I walk to him and see he’s worried. “You haven’t said a word.”
He nods. “There’s not much to say. You’re taking a dog and I think that’s a smart move. You’ve already told us why there isn’t anyone to partner with you and they aren’t really here for anything, but to show support. You were shot and your girl was hurt. You’re able to deal with both without us, but I wanted to see that you were okay. The fuckin’ crazy Brothers are just comic relief at this point.”
I laugh. “Thanks Dad. I’m fine.”
He nods. “I see that. I’m proud of you Son. These fuckin’ fanatics need to be stopped.”
Dakota comes in smiling. “I had hoped I would not miss the obligatory visit from the ‘rents.”
“Just in time. Thanks Brother.” He touches my arm and I look back at my dad. “It wasn’t the fanatics. They were aiming for me and Dean. It was to hurt the MC.”
I look at Dakota. “I’m good Dakota can you release more from Dean?”
“You need the tissue mended. Super glue is not really a medical treatment. Nadine is sleeping. She does not have energy to release. The boys did well for her.”
“Super glue?” Tiny asks and I laugh.
Prez smiles. “He wouldn’t let Nick touch him so he could hold Dean up in the air.”
I turn back to Dakota while they pick that apart. “Will she wake up tonight?” He shakes his head no. “Will you be here long enough for me to take Nekanis for a run?”
“I will stay until you return Brother. Someone needs to keep the ‘rents from covering you in body armor and partnering you with Danny.”
I crack up. “I’ll be twenty minutes. Call if you need me.”
“I will Christian. Go take your dog out and stretch your back.”
I grab a shirt and suspend down the stairs. My dad follows me. “I’m just going for a quick run.”
“The brace works for you.”
“Yeah. I love it. I can’t stand without it yet, but it keeps me moving as if my leg is fine while it’s on.”
“She’s incredible.” I see a happy Mitch in his head.
I smile. She is. “Nekanis out.” We start and my dad paces to me. Nekanis runs ahead and I smile. He loves being out as much as I do. We see Taylor and Delta, but don’t stop. He throws chin and keeps running the other way. I’m feeling my leg and back when we walk in so I suspend up the stairs. ‘Rents are still here and Dakota is holding my Little Pixie’s arm. I bend and breathe deep. When I feel his hand on my shoulder I stand straight.
“I’m good Brother, should I be worried?” I indicate Dean.
“Always, but she will be fine. She needs time for her body to heal. She is getting that now.”
I nod. “Thanks for staying.”
“I would not miss the chance to see the ‘rents in all their glory.” He’s got a serious look on his face, but I crack up. He’s so fuckin’ funny. “I will check in on her in the morning Brother.”
I throw him chin and look at my girl. “We were here, why did you wait for Dakota to be here? We wouldn’t let anything happen to her,” Pres asks.
I look around. Prez is gone. I guess I have to answer. “If she woke up he can calm her. His touch is healing. If you touch her now she’ll be out longer.”
He nods and I pace. I wish they’d go already. Uncle Danny stands. “They don’t need us here tonight. Christian and LB have it handled. We can’t change or fix anything and Christian can do anything they need. I’m going home.” Tiny follows him out throwing me chin.
My dad hugs me quick. “Proud of you Son. Call if you need me.”
“I will Dad. Thanks for coming. It feels good.”
He smiles and walks out. Pres and VP are watching me. I wait feeling impatient. “No one gave you the vision they saw,” he says it in a resigned way. I nod. “I don’t like that we almost lost you today,” Pres says.
I smile. “
I can’t say it would make the top of my best day list either. It’s been the way we’ve always worked. It’s as it should be Pres. The bigger picture is always the hardest view to see. Our purpose is keeping the vision alive and working to make it better for more. I’m just a small piece of that picture Pres. I have no problem giving my life for that cause, especially if it means someone else that carries that vision makes it. It’s as it should be.”
He takes that in for a couple of seconds. “You’re not pissed at them for not telling you?”
I’m surprised. “I understand what changing the outcome means better than most and know that even for me, it is what it is. I don’t get the benefit of visions of me. I trust my Officers and family to do what’s right, even if it’s hard for them to do that. Even if it means I don’t make it. We have no regret in us to look back at Pres. Every one of your Officers would die for you and not think twice about that decision. I don’t understand why it’s so hard for you to see that we would do the same. We’ve been doing it for years. I would never be pissed at anyone for keeping alive what I’ve freely given my life to defend. Like I said, it’s as it should be.”
Uncle Steve stands up. “He’s right. Leave ‘em alone. He keeps sayin’ same shit over and over. Problem isn’t you need it, it’s you seein’ it. Not his problem. Let’s go.” He throws me chin. “Good Brother, but stupid fuckin’ questions get old even for me.”
I laugh watching him pull Pres out. Thank fuck, I think, as I turn back to my girl. I take a quick shower and come in raising her up. It’s almost two. I slide in, but can’t take the feel of my weight on my back so I suspend. Nekanis sits watching. I lower and call him to her. When he lays with his head on her back I raise us all up and close my eyes memorizing the feel of her against my chest and down my side. Her heart is beating against me. I’ve never felt anything like that and spent time a couple of nights ago trying to figure out how the feel of her heart calms and focuses me. We are connected through that beat. That’s the best I came up with. She’s mine and that’s how it was meant to be. Her heartbeat is my life force. As it should be.
I jump relaxing on the rock. All is calm in my mind and the spirit world. I look for my Protectors. They’re relieved the day didn’t go as they saw. I smile, I am too. I hold her closer. I wasn’t really honest with Pres; losing her would be my one regret. Her hands on me is a dream I never thought would really happen. Knowing it’s the same for her is a comfort only when we’re all safe. She freaked waking up without me. I don’t ever want to be the one that causes my Little Pixie tears or pain. Dying would hurt her and that hurts me. Knowing I wouldn’t change it doesn’t help.