by Julie Tizard
The rest of her landings went equally well until the airplane in front of her flew a “bomber pattern.” They were too wide and delayed their final turn too long until it was obvious she didn’t have the proper distance behind them to land.
“Tango 61, going around,” she called as she added full power, brought the landing gear up, and retracted the flaps. She couldn’t fly over the other plane, so she banked to offset her jet from the runway to keep them in sight. She departed the pattern and flew back to Willie for some more landings until the fuel gauges showed it was time to land. Captain Hardesty hadn’t said a word to her the entire flight. Her silence was disconcerting, and Casey hoped she hadn’t messed up too bad.
Casey completed her shutdown checklist, filled out the aircraft logbook, and walked back into the parachute room in silence with Captain Hardesty next to her. Casey was dying inside. She had to know how she did.
“Well, Casey, you showed me today you can fly the jet by yourself. Good job.”
Casey wanted to scream out loud. Instead, she maintained her composure as she listened to the rest of the debrief, looking intently at Captain Hardesty.
“Your landings were consistently good, and you were analyzing and correcting your own errors. You showed good judgment when you decided to go around at the aux field. The guy ahead of us screwed you over by flying a bomber pattern, and you handled that situation exactly as you should have. I expect you to do that tomorrow when you solo, and every other flight from now on. For your solo flight tomorrow, we’ll fly together for the first pattern and landing. Assuming that all goes as well as it did today, we’ll taxi back in, I’ll jump out of the jet, and then you’re on your own. Do you have any questions about your ride today?”
“No, ma’am.”
“You did well today, Casey. Don’t fuck up tomorrow.”
When she got up to leave the flight room, Kathryn put her hand on Casey’s shoulder and gave it a firm squeeze.
There was a little electric tingle that ran down from Casey’s shoulder to her spine.
Chapter Nine
May 1992
Casey hardly slept anticipating her solo flight. When she walked into the flight room, she noticed two names were erased from the big schedule board. It was scary how quickly you could be washed out of pilot training if you screwed up. Bust three rides in a row, and you were gone in less than a week.
She banished that thought from her mind. Her whole life would be ruined if she got washed out. Failure was not an option. She had to put doubt and fear in a little box in the back of her mind, lock it, and not think about it.
The tradition was to buy a bottle of your IP’s favorite alcohol as a gift to them for soloing you out, but she had no idea what kind of booze Captain Hardesty liked.
“Captain Arnau, can I ask you a question?”
“Sure, Casey. What’s up?”
“Do you know what kind of alcohol Captain Hardesty likes?”
“She doesn’t drink, Casey. But I have heard she’s fond of See’s chocolate, especially dark chocolate.”
“Thanks, ma’am.”
Casey was antsy as she watched the flight room door waiting for Captain Hardesty. She didn’t have to wait long. Captain Hardesty strode into the flight room like she owned it. She had a smile on her face as she made a straight line for Casey.
“Ready to go fly, Lieutenant?”
“Yes, ma’am, I sure am.”
Casey knew she had to show Captain Hardesty she could handle everything today. She checked the logbook to make sure there were no maintenance issues with the jet, climbed in, and strapped the airplane to her body. She was sure and confident as she completed her preflight checks. She taxied out to the runway, took off, and entered the traffic pattern for her first landing. The pattern was busy with about a dozen other jets in the air with her. She saw all of them, adjusted her spacing for them, and flew two flawless approaches and landings.
“Casey, make this one a full stop. You’re ready.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Oh my God, she’s actually going to let me solo.
She landed, turned off the runway, taxied back to the ramp, and shut down both engines.
“After I get out, the crew chief will come over and secure the right seat, then he will signal you to start the engines again. Fly three touch-and-go landings, then a full stop. If you need to go around or break out of the pattern, then do it. Don’t try to land out of a bad approach, just go around and try it again. If you have any emergencies, handle it. You’re the pilot in command now.”
Captain Hardesty climbed out of the jet and, instead of leaving, she stood over to the side, just past the wing tip. Casey waited for the visual signal from the crew chief, then started up both engines. She checked her engine instruments and called for taxi clearance.
“Ground, Hook 27 Solo, ready for taxi.”
“Hook 27 Solo, taxi to runway three-zero left.”
When she cleared the area before taxi, she saw Captain Hardesty snap to attention and bring her hand up to salute her. She felt a lump in her throat as she returned the salute, pushed the throttles up, and taxied to the runway.
*****
After she climbed out of the plane, Kathryn stood just past the left wingtip watching Casey. No matter how many students she’d taught to fly, and there were many of them, this moment always gave her mixed emotions. She knew Casey was ready, but she also knew anything could happen up there, especially in a very busy traffic pattern. Her judgment as an instructor pilot was on the line, as well as the student’s life, whenever she let a student solo a jet for the first time. She’d never been wrong in this decision, and she knew Casey wouldn’t disappoint her. She was happy with her own ability as an instructor pilot to correct Casey’s flying problems, but she was bursting with pride for Casey. She had seen her confidence as a pilot grow before her eyes. The desire to fly was so strong in Casey she’d risked asking the head scheduler for an IP change, an unheard of request from a student, to get to her goal. Now, as she watched Casey from outside the plane go through her preflight checks, this was the moment they had worked for together. This was why she loved being an instructor pilot.
Kathryn smiled looking at Casey get ready to taxi out. She resembled a large insect in the plane with her white helmet on, dark, shiny visor over her eyes, green mask covering her face, and an oxygen hose dangling from the mask like a big proboscis. Not all instructors waited by the jet for their students to fly, but Kathryn knew this was important. She always thought of her own solo and the gesture of respect her IP had shown her. When Casey looked at her before she started her taxi, Kathryn came to attention and gave Casey her best salute. Casey paused a moment, then returned the gesture. She felt like a mother eagle nudging her own fledgling out of the nest. Enjoy this, Casey. It only happens once in your life.
*****
The plane seemed oddly empty without Captain Hardesty sitting next to her. Everything went just as Casey had practiced it. She talked to herself out loud as she maneuvered around the pattern looking for other airplanes and executing her approaches and landings. Her first landing was a little firm, but not too bad. Her second and third landings were grease jobs.
“Hook 27 Solo, gear down, full stop.” She saw a plane still on the runway in front of her. Come on, bucko, get off the runway.
“Hook 27, go around, traffic on the runway.”
“Roger, Hook 27 Solo, going around.”
“Crap, I hope they don’t bust me for that.”
“Just fly the jet, Casey,” she heard Captain Hardesty’s voice say in her head.
After the go-around, she flew her last pattern and landing, made a good touchdown, and taxied back in. God, I hope Captain Hardesty didn’t see me go around.
After filling out the aircraft logbook, Casey saw a large group of her classmates in a crowd by the parachute shop. They surrounded her, took off her parachute, took her helmet from her, and hoisted her into the air. They all were shouting, “Whoop, whoop, whoop,”
as they carried her over their heads to the solo water tank.
She remembered the sunny Saturday afternoon two weeks ago when her whole class came out to paint the solo tank with their class patch and motto, “Fire on High.” It was a fun tradition that every class decorated the solo tank, but at the time, she didn’t picture herself being thrown into it. Now her moment had come. She’d soloed a jet for the first time, and her class was honoring her by hurling her into the ice-cold water tank. Her joy was overflowing.
Just before they threw her into the solo tank, Casey sought out the one person she wanted to see. She locked eyes with Captain Hardesty and was happy to see her laughing at her expense with the traditional dunking festivities. Their eyes stayed on each other as Casey flew through the air and hit the water with a big splash.
*****
Kathryn applauded with the other IPs and students as Casey climbed out of the solo tank dripping wet. The flight commander, Captain Stavros, came up and shook her hand as did everyone else, with the notable exception of Lieutenant Carter. Kathryn stood back a little observing Casey. Even though soaking wet, she looked tall, happy, and confident as she shared her accomplishment with her classmates. She looks different now. Beautiful and radiant.
The first solo flight was a milestone for anyone, but for an Air Force pilot, soloing a jet and getting thrown in the solo tank was a baptism. You were no longer thought of as just a dumb student, you were now a pilot—an inexperienced, beginner pilot, but a real pilot nonetheless. Kathryn relished watching Casey enjoy her success. She appreciated seeing all women student pilots succeed, but Casey was special. She loved the bright smile on her face, and even in a soaking-wet, baggy green flight suit, Casey was a striking-looking woman. Kathryn was proud of her but also surprised at the sensation of a small tingle in the depths of her belly. Casey really is gorgeous.
At that instant, Casey saw Kathryn and made a beeline for her. Kathryn couldn’t help but return her big smile. Uh-oh, Casey—no hugs, no hugs—not in front of the guys. Before giving Casey the chance to commit the fatal error of showing affection for an IP, she stepped forward and offered her handshake. Casey paused, indicating she understood the unspoken rule, and grasped Kathryn’s hand in a firm grip.
“Good job, Casey,” Kathryn said as she returned the firm grip. This was the highest praise an IP could give a student pilot. Anything more would be unseemly.
“Thanks, ma’am, I really appreciate your help. I couldn’t have done it without you.”
“Sure you could have. I just helped you see your own mistakes. You soloed all on your own. Don’t ever forget that.”
“I won’t, ma’am.”
Chapter Ten
Mike and Jeff soloed the next day, and when the flight room was somewhat quiet, Casey asked Captain Arnau if she could be excused for half an hour to run an important errand. Captain Arnau granted her a thirty-minute leave and she rushed over to the Wing Headquarters building. She found the flight safety office on the second floor and asked the secretary if Captain Hardesty was available.
“Second door on the right, Lieutenant.”
“Thank you, ma’am,” Casey answered.
The door read, “Captain Kathryn Hardesty, Chief, Flight Safety.” Just as Casey raised her hand to knock on the half open door, she heard music coming from inside. She stopped and listened for a minute. It sounded like classical music, maybe opera. It was something grand and soaring. Casey glanced into the office and saw Captain Hardesty’s back as she was looking out the big windows watching the planes in the traffic pattern. Casey couldn’t take her eyes off her. Just before she was about to announce her presence, feeling a little guilty for staring, Captain Hardesty turned to face her.
“Casey. Sorry, I didn’t hear you knock. Guess the music is a little loud,” she said as she turned the volume down.
“I don’t mean to disturb you, ma’am, I just wanted to give you this.” Casey handed her a white box.
“Thanks, Casey, but I don’t drink.”
“It’s not alcohol, ma’am. I just wanted to say thanks for your help. Have a good day.” Casey set the box on the desk.
Kathryn unwrapped the box, her eyes got big when she saw the two-pound box of See’s dark chocolate candy. “Well done, Casey,” she said as she ripped into the famous treats.
*****
Casey’s next big hurdle was passing her first check ride. She would have to pass six check rides to graduate from pilot training. Proficiency checks were a big part of every pilot’s life, and she already knew how this game worked. You had to fly like you were solo, even though the check pilot was sitting next to you, and he judged you on everything you did. If you screwed up, the check pilot might let you repeat the maneuver to try and make it better. If it was an unforgiveable error, such as forgetting to put the landing gear down, he just flew the plane back to the base and you busted the check ride. If you passed all the flight maneuvers, the check pilot then grilled you on aircraft systems, emergency procedures, and flight regulations. If you answered his questions wrong, you could still bust the ride. If you busted a check ride, you got one or two practice rides, then a recheck. If you failed the recheck, you were kicked out of pilot training. In short, the whole process was a nerve-rattling minefield.
Casey had to fly with Carter, and he still screamed at her, but she didn’t let it get to her. He showed her the loop, aileron roll, and split S, and she loved every second of flying acrobatics.
Casey hoped to fly with Captain Hardesty again, but she wasn’t on Good Grief’s schedule board. The day before her check ride, Captain Hardesty showed up in the flight room even though she wasn’t on the flying schedule.
“Lieutenant Tompkins, let’s do a pre-check ride ground eval.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Casey answered. Other student pilots gathered around them to listen in. She ran through aircraft systems questions like it was a game of Jeopardy. She asked flight regulation questions and grouped them together so they made a lot more sense. She summarized the emergency procedures into the most important points to remember.
“Don’t allow yourself to get nervous. You will make mistakes in the air. The check pilot wants to see you recognize your errors and correct them yourself. Remember, the ground eval is like a hostile interrogation. Only answer the questions he asks. Do not bullshit the check pilot. If you do, he will know it, and rip you a new asshole. Just fess up if you have no idea how to answer a question. Good luck, everyone.”
“Thanks, ma’am,” the students said as she got up to leave.
“Lieutenant Tompkins, a word please.”
“Yes, ma’am?”
“You’ve got Captain Pescado tomorrow. His favorite systems are hydraulics and fire warnings. Make sure you are up on that.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“You’ll do fine, Casey. Just don’t get flustered if you make a mistake. Think of this as an opportunity to excel, to show him what you can do.”
How was it that she always knew just the right things to say to make Casey feel better?
The next day Casey was ready and also nervous to show Captain Pescado that she could fly this jet. He was completely silent as she went through all her maneuvers. She was satisfied with her stalls and landings. After her single engine landing at Willie, Captain Pescado finally said, “I have the jet.”
Oh no, did I mess something up?
Captain Pescado requested an overhead pattern and flew the plane without saying anything.
He’s not going to even let me try it again? I’m screwed.
He did a touch-and-go, requested another pattern, then called for a full stop landing. Casey was dying inside. She felt hot tears well up in her eyes, but knew she could not let him see that. He didn’t say a word as they put their parachutes away.
Finally, he said, “Meet me in my office at the end of the hall, Lieutenant.”
“Yes, sir.” Here it comes, the end of pilot training, the end of my dream.
After washing her face, with
her head held high, like she was facing the executioner, she walked into his office.
“Well, Lieutenant Tompkins, you passed the flying part. Let’s see how you do on the ground eval.”
She wanted to scream in relief. He asked her every possible question about hydraulic malfunctions, fire warning systems, and a smattering of everything else from her flight books. She knew the answers to every question, replied without hesitation, and knew she had this.
“Good job, Lieutenant, you passed.” He stood and shook her hand.
“Thank you, sir.”
It was a Friday afternoon, she was done with this ordeal, and she really wanted to see Captain Hardesty and tell her all about it. Instead, she went to the Officer’s Club for several well-earned drinks.
*****
All weekend, Casey found her thoughts turning to Kathryn Hardesty. She wanted to talk to her, to fly with her, to sit next to her in the jet, and to feel the connection to her when they both had their hands on the stick together. She had to watch her conversation so that she wasn’t constantly talking about her. She was looking forward to the next phase of training—advanced acrobatics—and she wanted to ask Captain Hardesty about flying acro. More than anything, she wanted Kathryn Hardesty to be proud of her. She knew it was a waste of time to think about her all the time, but she didn’t care.