by H. D. Nels
“Help Line, Benny speaking.” He felt silly roleplaying to himself.
“Um, hi, Benny, I’m Ian. I thought I had a boyfriend, but he up and left. Apparently, he was less committed than me. I’ve met someone who makes my toes curl and my eyes roll back. I think it might be too soon. I’m not even sure if my boyfriend, well, ex-boyfriend, is okay.”
“Ian, I sense that you might be conflicted. Did the boyfriend ever make you curl your toes or roll your eyes?” He felt like a true professional counsellor at the moment.
“Nope, but he hated how I put the toilet paper on the roll. He disliked that I always put knives and forks in the dishwasher with the pointy edges down. He hated that I bought the one brand of toothpaste that I fucking well enjoy. I can’t think of much about me that he liked.” Ian had never spoken this out loud before and it was freeing to get it out of his head.
Benny said, “Okay, so having said that, how do you feel now? Tell me more about this someone who did amazing things to your upper and lower body. Be as explicit as you can. I want details.”
Ian sat up and put his phone down. His imaginary call actually did help him figure out his lot in life. Rene had disappeared more than a few times. Each time when he returned he was humble and contrite for a few days, and then he was back to his old self again. Ian was distracted by the almost painful erection he got from even thinking about Brody during his imaginary phone call.
He stretched and contemplated a snack or exercise before heading to bed, and his phone began playing Bad to the Bone ringtone. Rene was calling him. He grabbed it and sat in the same chair where he had his practice help line call a short while before. “Well, speak of the devil. I was just thinking about you. Wondering where you managed to get off to.”
There was a brief moment of silence. Then Rene said, “I’m sorry, Ian. A lot has happened over the past month, but I’m not a prisoner anymore. I’m allowed to call and decided my first one would be to you.”
Ian shook his head. “Okay, buddy, you’re going to have to explain that one. But first I need to know if you’re safe. Tell me what you can and I’ll draw a conclusion from there. Your family was sort of worried about you. I’d previously encountered your sudden disappearances before, so I waited before checking the morgue and filing a report with police. Speaking of which, what do I tell them?”
Rene chuckled. “My fucking family wasn’t even remotely concerned so don’t pile bullshit. I might have lied to you about a job interview. I was meeting someone—a guy. We chatted on Squirt and I thought he and I could maybe get into a business venture. It would involve guys on the website and we’d offer videotaping services. You know, so I wouldn’t have to live off you as much.”
Ian snorted. “If you got a real job you wouldn’t have had to live off me. But that’s my outside voice talking. You do not want to hear my inside voice. Let’s just say I got a suspended sentence for you using my bomber jacket to stash your weed. You said you were a prisoner. Explain that as simply as you can.”
“I was going to drop my pot off after the meeting at a motel with this guy. He’s absolutely dreamy by the way. He’s French and his name is spelled “Hughes”, pronounced oog. He took the jacket off me in the motel room and found the bag. He freaked and pulled me out of the room, leaving everything behind. He led me toward his car and seemed to calm down once we were outside.”
Ian made a humming sound. “This may come as a shock to you, but you are French. Okay, Acadian, but I’m sure that counts as French. But I digress. According to police, a witness put you and your French connection French kissing in the motel parking lot. It sounded pretty graphic to me. If he was forcing you to leave I’d have to assume he was dragging you by your tonsils with his tongue. Why did you text me to pick you up?”
“I waited for almost an hour and thought he wasn’t going to show up. I figured you’d give me a ride home. Look, I told you he calmed down in the parking lot. He might have kissed me but that was a trick to get me into his car. He used duck tape on my wrists and put a piece over my mouth once we were inside. He drove me to his place, parked in the garage and led me to his basement where he locked me in.” Ian could almost hear the pout. “I am French, but this guy is France French. He immigrated here a few years ago.”
Ian was skeptical but curious. “That’s duct tape, and why would he do that? Where is he now and what changed for him to let you make phone calls?”
Rene took a deep breath and sighed. “I’ve got Stockholm syndrome or whatever it is when a prisoner falls in love with his captor. He was going to kill me for trafficking drugs. It seems to be a big issue for him. I assured him the weed was mine and not to be sold. It took some of my best love-making skills to convince him I was sincere. He finally released me so I’m staying at his place now.”
Ian tried to get over his bit of shock. “He was going to kill you? I might be wrong here, but I’m not sure you’re safe with a person who could be capable of such actions. Vigilante justice is not condoned. Trust me, you would have been lynched for your constant criticism of every fucking thing I did around the house.” He blew out a frustrated breath. “Did you even consider that I might be worried? I need an honest answer from you for once. Were we ever a couple or was I only a bunkmate who rode your ass whenever you got the urge? I thought I was in love with you. I need to clarify exactly what we’ve got.”
Rene chuckled. “Ian, your flair for the drama is always refreshing. You fuck better than anyone I’ve ever met—well except maybe for Hughes. We’ve been friends forever and I always felt it would be a shame to ruin that with love. I’m still in the city and soon I expect I’ll be able to go out and visit friends. I’d like to see you so we can fuck again. Plus, I need to get my things if I’m going to move in here. I do love this man and he loves me, so I’m sure I’m safe. My big scary jailer is here now so I’ve got to go. I’ll call again soon.”
That was it. The call had ended and Ian was left to debate his options. The first thing would be to inform Detective Klassen that he’d heard from his missing friend. That might prove to be tricky because, even though Rene felt safe now, he had been abducted to be murdered. He was pretty sure the police would not be willing to look the other way. Then again, he didn’t have much information to pass along. He decided to fill them in on all that he knew based on his conversation with his definitely now ex.
* * * *
“You’re quiet this morning. Don’t tell me you and that gorgeous waiter had a spat. I’ll do what I can to fix things.” Janet set a coffee on Ian’s desk. “I’d like to go over ideas my team has, to see if we can get a boost in funding. We want to put on a new play at the community center. There are also suggestions for new sports events and the committee has things they want to try for family leisure times. Everyone is looking to capitalize on our growing success. Of course, it’s all because of you.”
Ian was only half listening and nodded. “I’m sure we can allocate funding so everyone leaves smiling. As long as this new play has all the male cast members fully dressed and not spilling seed everywhere, that is.”
Janet pouted. “You’re such a party-pooper. From the videos I’ve watched, the seed doesn’t spill as much as it erupts at a mind-blowing velocity. With all those young, hung males around this town, I’m surprised the sidewalks and parks aren’t painted white.”
Ian shook his head. “God, you truly are a twisted sister. I wonder which of your genes got seriously screwed up to have your mind work the way it does. Maybe I need to bring a scientist on board. She would be tasked with trying to figure you out.”
Janet put her hands on her hips. “Don’t change the subject. I asked if you and the waiter had a fight. You’re not the usual laid-back man I look forward to teasing every day. What’s going on, Ian?”
Ian took a deep breath and slowly released it. He vaguely remembered that technique from a yoga program they’d developed. It turned out to be a huge success, at least until the instructor was caught getting plowed by a bare
ly-legal student while she was in a down-dog pose. It was rather impressive, but not appropriate for their organization. He wondered if Janet might have been involved in that one.
“I had a call from Rene last evening. He’s apparently well and in love with a potential serial killer who held him hostage for weeks. Or so he said. I don’t know what to believe, other than that he was sincere when he said I was the best fuck he’d ever had. Oh, and that he’d never loved me.” He put his elbow on the edge of his desk and brushed his palm over his forehead. “Brody’s fine and I like hanging around with him. I’m not sure I’m ready for a relationship this soon.”
“News flash, boss, you finished telling me Rene never loved you. No love means no relationship. Therefore, you’re not obligated to mourn or even feel bad. Pull up your socks, pull down your pants and briefs and get to work on Brody. Remember, I have it on my bucket list to watch.” She smirked and twirled around to leave the office. She called over her shoulder, “I fully intend to get that one scratched off soon.”
“For your information, I wear boxers, not briefs.” Ian sat back to wonder what bizarre alignment of the stars and planets when he was born caused him to attract so many unusual people. He snorted. Not unusual people, fucking wingnuts.
Ian picked up his phone after digging out a card from his wallet. Detective Klassen answered on the first ring. He wondered how to begin this conversation and decided to get right to the point.
“Good morning, Detective. I heard from Rene Bouchard last night. He called to assure me he was safe—now. He had a story about being abducted by a man who hated drug dealers and had planned to kill him. He’d found the bag of weed that was in the inner pocket of my jacket. I’d loaned it to Rene—the jacket not the weed—and it was found by your colleagues. I was charged with possession, but that’s a whole different story. Rene swears he’s safe and in love with his captor. I have no idea where he is other than still in the city, but I guess I should withdraw the missing person report.”
Klassen was quiet for a few moments. Then he chuckled. “Tell me honestly, what do you make of the story? It sounds pretty far-fetched to me.” His tone became serious. “Is it possible he was coerced into saying what he did? You know the man better than anyone I’ve spoken to about him, including his family.”
“I thought I knew the man. Turns out I know absolutely squat about him. He may be telling the truth but my gut feels that he’s trying to ease his conscience by deflecting his behavior toward me. I guess time will tell. However, things play out, and even if the guy is a first class dick, I’d like him to be safe.”
They ended the call and Ian briefly considered calling Rene’s family. He was about to forego that joy but then decided that, out of decency, he would let them know he was safe and leave it at that.
Chapter Three
The last training session was over and Ian was about to start his first shift at the Help Line. Each station had a phone with five lines, a notepad and pens, and a binder full of resource and reference materials. Each call was to be logged with start and end times and a brief one-line summary of the nature of the call.
“Hey, Benny, it’s good to see you again. There will be three of us newbies on shift this evening. I’m going to grab the station beside yours.” Helen was an older lady who used an abundance of makeup and jet-black hair dye to thwart time. Her lips were painted an intense fire-engine red and she had been a real pleasure to train with. She was quick with a joke and definitely flirted with Ian, and David, one other younger guy in the group. Her real name was Delores.
“Hi, Helen, let’s hope it isn’t a trial by fire tonight. With you, me, and Bruce all being new, hopefully, the gods of compassion will be smiling on us.” Ian glanced over as Bruce came in to stow his gear under his desk and open his coffee. Bruce was the alter-ego of David.
Helen wiggled her fingers in a flirty wave when Bruce looked over. “It should go well. Our training was thorough and we’ve all got street sense. We’ll be fine. Maybe later, Ian, David, and Delores should go for a nightcap.”
Benny got settled when his phone rang. He glanced at Helen and shrugged. “Here goes nothing.” He took a deep breath and answered. “Help Line, this is Benny.” He heard breathing and figured the caller needed to muster the nerve to begin. “It’s fine if you need to take time to get your thoughts together. Why not begin by telling me how you’re feeling right now?”
He heard a soft female voice. “I don’t know how I feel right now. There’s so much I don’t understand. I’m worried about things.”
“I hear the worry in your voice. I’m here to listen if you’d like to talk about it. How about you tell me about the first thing that comes to mind that has you worried?” Benny noticed his tension had eased. It felt natural to him to have this type of conversation with a stranger. “If you’re comfortable enough with the idea, tell me your name, or a name I can use while we speak. It helps to lower barriers and may make it easier to understand feelings better. I’m Benny.”
There was another brief pause. “Hello, Benny, I’m Vera. I’m worried about my son. He told me he’s gay. I scald the dishes he uses, but I think I need him to leave. He’s been good to me but I’m afraid of AIDS. What do they do, Benny? Gay people, I mean?”
Benny bit back a sarcastic reply. He heard her fear in her voice and this was about her, not her gay son. Nor was it about the gay counsellor to whom she was speaking. “Tell me what you understand about HIV and AIDS, Vera. There have been a lot of advanced studies. I may be able to get you some current and helpful information to put your mind at ease.”
“I read that homosexuals get diseases all the time. I’m afraid my boy caught something. What do they do, Benny? I know how things work with men and women, but what do two men do when they get…intimate?” She had lowered her voice to almost a whisper.
“Vera, if people are careful it is easy to avoid any type of disease. HIV is the virus that causes AIDS. It can’t be spread by sharing cooking or eating utensils, so there isn’t a need to sterilize the place settings your son uses. Normal washing, the way you did before your son told you he was gay is fine. As to what they do, that is a very personal thing. Many heterosexual couples have ways of expressing love and being intimate that may differ from what you experienced. May I ask, what has changed with your son after he came out to you?”
Vera sighed. “Benny, he still looks and acts the same. He’s sad that I got cross with him but he still helps me with things I can’t do now that I’m seventy. I feel different about him now. Am I a bad person for that?” She sniffled.
“You’re not a bad person at all. You might not have correct or sufficient information to understand your son and his preferences. It may be uncomfortable for you both, but it would do good to have this conversation together. I’d like to think that you can both get past this and continue with your lives being happy, the way it should. If your son meets a partner, I’ll bet he’d be proud of you if you accepted a son-in-law. These are things mother and son have to work out. You’ve taken a big step opening up to a complete stranger about your concerns. I respect that.” He glanced over and smiled at Helen as she mouthed, “Wow.”
Vera chuckled. “I could always say I’m too old for new things. What if I can’t change how I feel? He’s almost forty. I should have guessed, when he never brought a girl home, there was something different about him.”
“It’s nice to hear the tension leave your voice. Try to understand that while there might have been something different about your son, there wasn’t anything wrong with him. We’re never too old for new things—I promise you that. Think about our conversation and your concerns. Think about your son and how much he loves you. Ask him to help you find out more information about the things that worry you. You’re a good person, Vera. I believe, from what you’ve told me, your son is, as well.”
Vera gave a small sigh. “Benny, you’re a good man. I hope you have a loving family who knows that you’ve got a kind heart. I’ll thi
nk on what you said. Maybe soon I’ll be ready to have that talk with my Charlie. Thank you.”
Benny beamed with pride. “Vera, call anytime. I’d love to hear how things go with you. If I’m not here ask to have a message passed to me. I can’t call you back, but know that I’ll be thinking about you.” The call ended and Benny leaned back in his chair.
“Honey, you were marvelous.” Helen drew out that last word and added an accent. “Absolutely marvelous. I was getting hot listening to your sensuous voice, especially when you said, ‘ways of expressing love and being intimate’. I’d like to share my ideas with you about that.” She was about to continue when, to Benny’s relief, her phone rang.
Delores pouted when both Ian and David declined the invitation to go for drinks after their first shift. Both men pleaded that work came early and they wanted to get some rest before then. Ian made a mental note to ask Delores if she knew Janet.
* * * *
Ian stopped by Chaps instead of going straight home. He was hoping to see Brody. The place was busy so Ian edged through the crowd to find a spot at the bar. He ordered a bottle of Kokanee beer and glanced around. He couldn’t help the smile that pulled his lips when Brody walked to the bar to ring in an order. He walked over beside the handsome waiter. In his best British accent, he said, “’Ello sailor, come ’ere often?” He loved the way the gorgeous man’s eyes twinkled and his smile lit up the place.
“Aye, mate, I ’ave one in every port. But I ain’t never seen no beauty like the one standin’ right beside me now.” He chuckled. “Let me get this order dropped and I’ll take a quick break.” He loaded his tray with drinks and easily moved through the crowd. He was back before Ian had a chance to miss him. He led them to a table off to the side and gave Ian a quick kiss before they sat.
“I could get used to this. Coming into a bar and getting ravished by a very sexy, hunky waiter.” He took a swallow of his beer and set the bottle on the table. He reached over to take Brody’s hand in his. He gently rubbed his thumb over the man’s knuckles.